Would You Rather Discover Your Partner's Affair Or...

Fresh from a huge weekend at Sydney’s Festival of Dangerous Ideas, we take you behind the scenes of the talks, performances and conversations that stayed with us long after leaving Carriageworks. We unpack one particularly confronting moment inside Mark Haslam’s FAKE, which opened up a conversation about groupthink, social pressure, integrity, binary thinking and whether we’re really as willing to engage with uncomfortable ideas as we like to believe.We also reflect on the ideas that challenged us most across the weekend, from Joanna Bourke’s confronting discussion of crime, forgiveness and rehabilitation, to Tim Minchin’s call to find the humanity in people we disagree with, and we take you inside our own FODI panel, Non-Monogamy Makes Us Better Parents, where alongside psychologist Dr. Jenny Brown, researcher Dr. Rebecca Huntley and moderator Dr. Tim Dean we explored relationships, parenting, attachment and the surprising common ground that can exist between very different perspectives.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube |Other Links:Mark Haslam - FakeDr. Jenny Brown - Parent Hope PodcastDr. Tim Dean This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

What does it mean to truly want the person you love to shine?In this episode, we explore compersion beyond sex and the joy that can come from watching your partner create, succeed, receive praise and step fully into who they are.Following Liam’s recent performances, we reflect on creativity, jealousy, attention and the ways our relationships can either nurture our gifts or quietly ask us to make ourselves smaller. It leaves us wondering: how many of us dim our own light because we’re afraid of what our success might do to our relationship?We also talk about the reality of being two creative people building a life and family together, protecting each other’s time and energy, navigating periods when one of us is flourishing while the other is struggling, and making choices that preserve rather than diminish who we are.We also reflect on the film The Invite and its exploration of desire, creativity and losing yourself inside a relationship. Ultimately, we ask what it looks like to build a partnership where neither person has to shrink, and where loving someone means wanting them to feel fully alive.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | Festival of Dangerous Ideas This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we share some exciting personal news, including our upcoming appearance at the Festival of Dangerous Ideas, where we’ll be exploring the provocative topic Why Non-Monogamy Makes Us Better Parents. We also talk about Liam’s new creative work, Channels: Artists on Ageing Creatively, and reflect on creativity, ageing, and the importance of making space for the things that bring us alive.We then dive into a conversation about relationships, desire, and connection, sparked by a film that left Abbey completely captivated. Finally, we return to the famous 36 Questions That Lead to Love, exploring big questions about ageing, wisdom, mortality, and what it means to live a rich, intentional, and meaningful life.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | Liam’s Show Festival of Dangerous IdeasDive Deeper This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

What would you choose if there were no perfect answers?In this return of our Would You Rather series, we explore some confronting relationship dilemmas.Would you rather discover your partner had a passionate year-long affair you never knew about, or have them come to you beforehand and ask for permission to pursue the exact same connection openly?Would you choose the greatest romantic and sexual connection of your life if it only lasted two years, or a loving and stable partnership that never quite feels like your deepest connection?Along the way, we unpack honesty, consent, infidelity, desire, long-term partnership, non-monogamy, family stability, and the complicated ethical questions that emerge when real life collides with our ideals.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode of Evolving Love, we dive into one of the biggest fears people have around non-monogamy: what happens if you fall in love with someone else?We also unpack the difference between infatuation, limerence and lasting love. We share stories about dating separately for the first time, navigating intense emotional connections with other partners, and learning how openness and honesty helped us move through those experiences together instead of apart. We talk about the “new relationship energy” that can feel all-consuming, the fears it can trigger, and why emotional transparency became so important for us.More than anything, this conversation became an exploration of what love actually means.Can loving another person threaten an existing relationship, or can it deepen your understanding of connection, choice and commitment?Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | Retreat This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode of the Evolving Love podcast, we dive into one of the most common accusations aimed at non-monogamous people: are we actually narcissists? We unpack the way the word “narcissist” gets thrown around online and in relationship culture, and explore whether non-monogamy is genuinely selfish or whether it can actually require deeper empathy, accountability and communication. Along the way, we reflect on our own experiences with validation, jealousy, manipulation, admiration, social media culture and the messy reality of being human.We talk about the difference between healthy admiration and narcissistic validation, why modern social media increasingly rewards performative vulnerability, and whether non-monogamy exposes narcissism more clearly… or simply gets blamed for dynamics that exist everywhere.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | RetreatDive DeeperEvolving Love RetreatFriday 18th Sept - Sunday 20th Sept 2026 Yass Valley, New South Wales, AustraliaIn 2026, the Evolving Love Retreat opens to all.Whether you’re in a couple, throuple, or exploring solo, this retreat is for you. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we explore one of the biggest questions we hear: is non-monogamy actually right for you?We break it down into three parts, first looking at the reasons you probably shouldn’t open your relationship, signs you might be ready to start exploring, and finally we share what it feels like when you are ready to start exploring non-monogamy.We explore the red flags, the green lights, and the deeper questions that reveal whether opening your relationship will expand your connection or expose what’s already not working.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | Retreat This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

Today’s conversation is deeply personal for us and one that features a unique, open-minded and compassionate perspective from our guest.We’re joined by Dr. Sandra Webster, an educational leader, former school principal across three different countries, and more recently the author of the book “Creating Family-School Partnerships”.In this conversation, we explore what true inclusion looks like for families who don’t fit the traditional mould, how schools can better understand the reality of diverse home lives, and why partnership between parents and educators is essential.We also dive into power, communication, and what it takes to create environments where every child and every family feel like they genuinely belong.Sandra Webster Links:Sandra's BookEvolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we reflect on what it has been like to take our relationship into the public eye after appearing on SBS’s Insight, where we spoke about jealousy, envy, and compersion. What followed was a flood of online commentary, much of it critical. We unpack what it feels like to have our relationship reduced to a two-minute clip and judged at scale, and we explore why people feel so certain in their opinions about something they don’t fully understand.We explore how judgment is a natural human response, but how the way it’s expressed matters, and how much of what people say is actually a reflection of their own fears, experiences, or conditioning around relationships. We also share how we each process criticism differently, one of us feeling largely unaffected, the other needing to work through it more consciously. Through it all, we come back to what grounds us, our relationship, our values, and our sense of self, and why continuing to have these conversations publicly still feels important, even when it invites criticism.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | Retreat This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe

Today’s conversation opens up a wider reflection on modern gender discourse and and whether some narratives unintentionally deepen the divide between men and women rather than bringing them together. We explore what it means to hold space for the realities of inequality while still imagining a future where men and women move forward in partnership rather than opposition. We also discuss Married At First Sight, dating culture and explore the concept of arranged marriage.Evolving Love Links:Website | Instagram | Substack | Youtube | Retreat This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit evolvingloveproject.substack.com/subscribe