The Motherwhelm

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Sarah, a primary school teacher and mother (now) three, to talk about the ways motherhood changes us, challenges the stories we've inherited, and asks us to reconsider what it means to be a good mother.Sarah grew up watching her mother and grandmother devote themselves entirely to their children, often at the expense of their own needs. While she recognises the love behind their sacrifices, she is determined to model something different for her daughters: a version of motherhood in which mothers are entitled to rest, care, emotional expression, and lives of their own.We talk about the influence of childhood experiences on our parenting, the work of recognising and responding to emotional triggers, and Sarah's experiences of maternal anger. She speaks candidly about the moments when exhaustion and unmet needs have turned into rage, and how psychological support has helped her better understand her emotions.What I found particularly moving was Sarah's hope that her daughters will grow up with a different understanding of motherhood from the one she inherited. One in which caring for yourself isn't something to feel guilty about, but an essential part of caring for a family.This is a conversation about the stories we carry into motherhood, the patterns we choose to change, and the possibility of growing alongside our children.Sarah is now sharing her poetry about motherhood on Instagram: @motherhoodmusings_Resources mentioned:BooksMatrescence — Lucy JonesTen Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child's Mental Health — Dr Billy GarveyHunt, Gather, Parent — Michaeleen DoucleffRaising Resilient and Compassionate Children — Lael Stone and Marion RoseOwn Your Story — Lael StoneWhere the Light Gets In — Ben CrowePodcastsThe Imperfects — particularly the episodes featuring Lael Stone, Dr Billy Garvey and Maggie DentGrowing — Beth Ryan and Lily ClaxtonHumans Being — Lael StoneAustralian Birth StoriesAustralian VBAC StoriesPop Culture Parenting — Dr Billy GarveyDocumentary- SeenTopics discussed: maternal identity, matrescence, generational patterns, childhood experiences, generational trauma, maternal mental health, psychological therapy, EMDR, pregnancy loss, miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, pregnancy after loss, birth stories, physiological birth, water birth, postpartum haemorrhage, birth preparation, body image, body acceptance, emotional regulation, maternal anger, mum rage, parenting triggers, breaking generational cycles, maternal guilt, self-care, essential care, mental load, invisible labour, household responsibilities, relationship resentment, Fair Play, co-sleeping, infant sleep, intuition, motherhood expectations, asking for help, parenting toddlers, emotional intelligence, journaling, poetry and creativity.

What happens when women have the right to choose where they give birth, but the care that makes those choices possible is no longer accessible?In this special collaborative episode of The Motherwhelm and Australian VBAC Stories, I'm joined by Katelyn Comerford, President of Homebirth NSW and Coordinator of Homebirth Australia, and Georgia Slee, birth and postpartum doula, to discuss an urgent issue facing Australian maternity care.On 1 January 2027, an existing exemption from professional indemnity insurance requirements for privately practising midwives attending homebirths is due to expire. But the insurance product currently available excludes non-endorsed midwives, many of whom attend homebirths as second practitioners.Without an accessible and affordable insurance solution, families could lose access to privately supported homebirth, particularly in regional and rural communities where maternity services are already limited.Together, we unpack what professional indemnity insurance actually is, why the current arrangements are causing concern, and what these changes could mean for midwives, pregnant women, and their families.We also discuss the emotional consequences of losing access to a chosen model of care, the importance of continuity of midwifery care, and the possibility that some women may feel they have no alternative but to give birth without professional assistance.I share my own experiences of birth trauma and precipitous labour, and why access to supported homebirth is so much more than a philosophical preference for some women.Ultimately, this conversation isn't just about homebirth. It's about bodily autonomy, informed consent, and the difference between being told you have a choice and actually being able to exercise it.We also discuss Homebirth Australia's proposed solutions and the upcoming Grandmother of All Rallies, alongside national rallies planned for Saturday 21 November 2026.Further information and resourcesHomebirth Australia — https://www.homebirthaustralia.org/Homebirth NSW — https://www.homebirthnsw.org.au/Details of the national rallies, campaign updates, and ways to participate will be shared through the organisations above.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Tori, a mother of two and PE teacher, to talk about birth trauma, postnatal depression and anxiety, and the profound difference between her two experiences of birth and early motherhood.At 32 weeks pregnant with her first baby, Tori broke her leg in an accident that left her unable to walk. Just three weeks later, she went into premature labour. What followed was an exhausting and traumatic birth involving a hospital transfer, prolonged labour, an emergency caesarean during which she experienced pain despite having an epidural, and a difficult physical recovery.The challenges continued after she brought her daughter home. Months of unsettled nights, feeding difficulties, severe sleep deprivation and isolation contributed to significant postnatal depression and anxiety. Tori speaks candidly about how difficult this period became, the impact on her relationships, and the importance of the professional support she eventually received.Together, we explore motherhood's impact on identity, body image, friendships, and marriage, the importance of informed decision-making and compassionate maternity care, and the complicated reality of loving motherhood while finding it incredibly difficult.This is a conversation about what happens when birth doesn't go as planned, the lasting impact of how women are treated during childbirth, and the possibility of finding confidence and joy in motherhood after a deeply challenging beginning.Resources mentioned:Australian VBAC Stories podcastThe Great Birth RebellionTopics discussed: birth trauma, premature birth at 35 weeks, pregnancy injury, emergency caesarean, epidural failure, feeling dismissed during childbirth, maternal autonomy, informed consent, medical trauma, breastfeeding, infant feeding difficulties, sleep deprivation, postnatal depression, postnatal anxiety, suicidal thoughts, seeking psychological support, birth debriefs, VBAC, vaginal birth after caesarean, breech presentation, external cephalic version (ECV), birth preparation, positive birth experiences, postpartum recovery, maternal identity, body image, exercise after motherhood, friendship changes, isolation, marriage after children, partner support, parenting two children and self-advocacy.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Mel, a mother of five and occupational therapist with more than 20 years of experience, to talk about the ever-changing nature of motherhood, postpartum anxiety, and learning to trust yourself as a parent.With children ranging in age from five to eighteen, Mel has experienced motherhood across many different stages of life. She reflects on the expectations she carried into becoming a mother, the difficulties she encountered with breastfeeding, and the significant anxiety she experienced after welcoming her second child, just fourteen months after her first.We talk about the importance of recognising when you need support, letting go of comparisons, and finding approaches to parenting that work for your own family rather than trying to meet everyone else's expectations.This conversation is a reminder that there is no single right way to mother, that asking for help is something to be proud of, and that sometimes the most important thing we can offer ourselves is a little more time, kindness and grace. Resources mentioned: motherscape.com.auInstagram: @motherscape_Sandwich by Catherine Newman The Treasure House by Amy MatthewsJulia Jones's Newborn Mothers postpartum doula training Topics discussed: raising five children, large families, the transition to motherhood, expectations versus reality, breastfeeding difficulties, combination feeding, postpartum anxiety, seeking mental health support, parenting children close in age, maternal identity, motherhood and career, occupational therapy in maternal health, Motherscape, postpartum preparation, self-compassion, maternal guilt, comparison, learning to let go, parenting children at different developmental stages, the mental load, bodily autonomy, the end of the baby years, children growing up, personal wellbeing, reading and finding time for yourself.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Claire, mother of two, singer-songwriter, filmmaker, and creator of the documentary Matrescence: The Hidden World of Motherhood, to talk about what really happens to women when they become mothers.Claire shares how years of working with children left her believing she was well prepared for motherhood, only to discover that nothing had prepared her for the enormity of the transition itself. We talk about her traumatic first birth, breastfeeding difficulties, the loss of autonomy she experienced within maternity care, becoming a mother again during COVID and the years of pushing through until her body eventually forced her to stop.It was through songwriting that Claire began making sense of what she had experienced — eventually discovering the word matrescence, and with it an entirely new way of understanding herself.Our conversation explores maternal ambivalence, identity, postpartum depletion, the cultural pressure for mothers to “do it all”, community and the village, pleasure and sexuality after motherhood, creativity, and what it means to find your voice again after becoming a mother.We also talk about Claire’s forthcoming documentary, Matrescence: The Hidden World of Motherhood, and her hope that giving women language for this enormous transition might help them feel less alone.Topics discussed: matrescence, maternal identity, expectations of motherhood, maternal archetypes, self-sacrificing motherhood, feminism, the mental load, birth trauma, autonomy in birth, caesarean birth, breastfeeding difficulties, postpartum depletion, maternal mental health, maternal ambivalence, motherhood during COVID, burnout, creativity, songwriting, finding your voice, mothers’ groups, community, the village, sexuality after motherhood, the erotic mother, pleasure, desire, being touched out, body connection, separation, co-parenting, boundaries, people-pleasing, perimenopause, becoming, and Matrescence: The Hidden World of Motherhood.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Michelle, a psychologist and mum in a blended family of five, to talk about breaking generational cycles, birth trauma, and letting go of the pressure to be the perfect mother.Michelle shares a complicated journey into motherhood that included pregnancy loss, fertility treatment, the breakdown of her relationship during pregnancy, becoming a single mum, and a difficult first birth. We also talk about finding love again, creating a beautifully connected blended family, her subsequent VBAC, and the significant birth injuries and physical recovery that followed.Along the way, Michelle reflects on how her own childhood has shaped the mother she wants to be, the relentlessness of parenting, repairing after we lose our patience, body image after babies, and learning that our children don't need perfection - they need connection.We also talk about how motherhood gave Michelle a sense of purpose she hadn't expected and ultimately led her to combine her work as a psychologist with her passion for pregnancy, birth, and motherhood through perinatal psychology. Resources mentioned:The Great Birth RebellionThe Mel Robbins' Podcast'Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers' by Gordon Neufeld & Gabor MatéTopics discussed: motherhood expectations, perfectionism, good-enough parenting, social media, perinatal psychology, childhood trauma, family violence, breaking generational cycles, unconditional love, rupture and repair, miscarriage, chemical pregnancy, fertility treatment, IUI, relationship breakdown during pregnancy, infidelity, single motherhood, caesarean birth, postpartum recovery, breastfeeding, blended families, co-parenting, VBAC, maternity care, birth trauma, forceps birth, third-degree tear, postpartum haemorrhage, blood transfusion, special care, prolapse, pelvic-floor recovery, body image, stretch marks, subsequent pregnancy after loss, preparing for another birth, relationships after children, the mental load, maternal identity, self-care, career and motherhood, slowing down and being present.

In this mini episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with four mums - Nikita, Caitlin, Nicole and Aline - for an honest conversation about the early months of motherhood.They share what they imagined motherhood would be like, what surprised them once their babies arrived, and what they wish they could go back and tell themselves in those first few weeks. We talk about sleep deprivation, breastfeeding, trusting your instincts, accepting help, finding other mums and learning that there is no single right way to do motherhood. And finally, they share what they would want another mum to know if she were listening in the middle of the night, wondering whether she was doing any of it right.Topics discussed: new motherhood, first-time motherhood, expectations versus reality, sleep deprivation, breastfeeding, formula feeding, maternal intuition, unsolicited advice, accepting help, asking for support, loneliness, mothers’ groups, finding community, comparison, trusting yourself, slowing down, the mental load, enjoying the little moments and how quickly the early months pass.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Kimberley, founder of Mum Walk, to talk about the reality of becoming a mother far from family during the pandemic, the isolation of early motherhood, and how those experiences eventually led her to build the community she had needed herself.Kim shares the shock of becoming a mother after years of being deeply career-focused, a difficult first birth in London, postpartum depression, and life with a colicky baby while separated from family in Australia. We also talk about her very different second experience of birth and postpartum, the identity shift of matrescence, and why connection with other mothers can make such a profound difference.We then trace Mum Walk from one local Facebook post to a growing grassroots movement creating free, accessible spaces for mothers to walk, talk, and build community together.This is a conversation about giving ourselves more grace, making motherhood visible, and recognising that if we want mothers to have a village, we have to build it together.Resources mentioned:mumwalk.orgTopics discussed:Motherhood identity, matrescence, pregnancy, pelvic girdle pain, maternity care in the UK and Australia, birth during COVID, birth trauma, postpartum depression, colic, sleep deprivation, maternal isolation, second-time motherhood, positive birth, postpartum body changes, chronic pelvic pain, community, friendship, Mum Walk, mothers’ groups, social connection, the nuclear family, third spaces, maternal wellbeing, volunteer community leadership, the mental and unpaid load of motherhood, self-doubt, grace and building the village.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Rose to talk about birth trauma, postpartum depression, pregnancy loss, and finding her way back to trust in herself after a difficult beginning to motherhood.Rose shares how the premature birth of her first son and an unexpected caesarean left her feeling unheard, separated from her baby, and struggling with attachment and her mental health in the months that followed.We talk about the expectations we place on that first moment of becoming a mother, what happens when the bond isn't instantaneous, and the lasting impact birth experiences can have on the way we see ourselves and our bodies.Rose also opens up about experiencing recurrent pregnancy loss, navigating pregnancy again after trauma, and eventually preparing for a home birth after caesarean. We explore informed decision-making, maternal intuition, advocacy, and what it can mean to approach birth again after your trust has been shaken.Beyond birth, we talk about identity, relationships, career, community, and the ways motherhood ultimately changed the direction Rose wanted her life to take.This is a conversation about trauma and loss, but also about rebuilding trust, finding support, and discovering that a difficult beginning doesn't have to define the rest of your motherhood story.Resources mentionedGidget HouseThe Great Birth RebellionIna May's Guide to Childbirth — Ina May GaskinZoe BlaskeyThe Birth BagTopics discussed: birth trauma, postpartum depression, maternal-infant attachment, premature birth, caesarean birth, pregnancy loss, recurrent miscarriage, VBAC, home birth after caesarean, birth advocacy, informed decision-making, maternal intuition, matrescence, motherhood identity, relationships, career change, doula support.

In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Taylor to talk about becoming a stepmother before she was ready for motherhood herself, navigating a complex co-parenting relationship, and how everything changed again when she welcomed children of her own.Taylor shares the rarely spoken-about reality of becoming a stepmum to a newborn, the loneliness of having no one around her who understood the experience, and the difficult emotions that surfaced after the birth of her first biological child. We talk about resentment, guilt, boundaries, therapy, and the pressure placed on stepmothers to take on a maternal role - even when nobody has asked what they are comfortable carrying.Later, Taylor shares her experience of an ectopic pregnancy, two subsequent miscarriages, and the anxiety of pregnancy after loss. She speaks candidly about knowing something was wrong, feeling dismissed by healthcare professionals, and the importance of advocating for yourself when you know your own body. We also discuss her eventual VBAC, the difference between a traumatic event and a birth that can still feel emotionally empowering, body image after motherhood, the mental load, toddlerhood, career flexibility, friendship, asking for help, and accepting that every family can look a little different.This is an honest conversation about the parts of motherhood and stepmotherhood we don’t always say out loud - and the relief that can come when someone finally tells us our feelings are allowed.Resources mentioned:The Great Birth RebellionPop Culture ParentingYou can listen to Taylor's birth stories in Episode 44 of Australian VBAC StoriesTopics discussed: Stepmotherhood, blended families, co-parenting, becoming a stepmum to a newborn, maternal expectations, postpartum mental health, resentment and guilt, therapy, boundaries, biological and step-parent bonds, motherhood identity, flexible work, occupational therapy, endometriosis, ectopic pregnancy, pregnancy loss, miscarriage, medical dismissal, self-advocacy, pregnancy after loss, perinatal anxiety, caesarean birth, VBAC, birth trauma, informed and respectful care, breastfeeding, postpartum recovery, body image, exercise and mental health, relationships after children, toddlerhood, the mental load, friendship, self-care, asking for help and accepting that families can look different.