Navigating Adult ADHD

What’s the connection between ADHD & trauma? And why can rejection, criticism or simply saying NO feel so incredibly difficult?In this episode, I’m joined by Rebecca Challoner, ADHD expert, author of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria & fellow ADHDer, for a conversation about ADHD, trauma & the ways they can shape our lives.Together, we explore:The relationship between ADHD & trauma - and how ADHD can increase our vulnerability to traumatic experiences.Why people-pleasing can feel safer than saying no.How Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) can impact almost every area of our lives.Why building a sense of success can help us better navigate RSD.An insightful conversation packed with relatable examples, fresh perspectives & plenty of food for thought.CONNECT WITH REBECCA: Book - Rejection Sensitive DysphoriaWebsiteFacebookInstagramLINKS TO MORE GOOD STUFF FROM NAVIGATING ADULT ADHD:*Discover how you can work with your ADHD brain - checkout our ADHD tools, workbooks & resources *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever picked up your phone for a quick 5 minute scroll, only to realise 45 minutes have disappeared? Or found yourself scrolling even when you're not actually enjoying it?Our ADHD brains crave novelty, stimulation & rewards - and our smartphones offer an endless supply... But at what cost?In this episode, we're exploring:Why ADHD brains are so drawn to our phones & the dopamine they offer.How scrolling becomes an automatic habit, even when we want to stop.The impact constant stimulation can have on our attention, relationships & ADHD symptoms.Why scrolling isn't always the rest we think it is.How our phones can become a way to escape uncomfortable thoughts & feelings.What we might be missing when we fill every spare moment with stimulation.This isn't about ditching your phone or adding another thing to feel guilty about. It's about getting curious about our phone use & asking one important question:Where do I WANT to spend my attention?> Click here for the Smartphone Compulsion Test mentioned in this episode.LINKS TO GOOD SH*T FROM NAVIGATING ADULT ADHD:*Discover how to work with your ADHD brain - checkout our ADHD tools, workbooks & resources *12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever feel like you can't trust yourself to follow through, make good decisions or stick to your plans?When you have ADHD, years of forgotten appointments, abandoned projects & broken promises to yourself can leave you feeling like you're the one person you can't rely on.But what if self-trust isn't about getting everything right?In this episode, we're talking about:Why adults with ADHD often struggle with self-trustThe sneaky ways low self-trust shows up in everyday lifeHow seeking other people's approval can undermine our confidenceWhy validating your feelings & honouring your needs mattersTwo simple ways to start rebuilding trust in yourselfBecause self-trust isn't about knowing you'll never mess up. It's about knowing you can handle things when you do.LINKS TO MORE STUFF FROM US:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

In this episode, we're talking about why so many adults with ADHD struggle with self-confidence, the sneaky ways we destroy it & how to start building it without needing to become a completely different person.We'll explore:Why your thoughts about yourself matter more than you realise3 things that destroy self-confidence (hello, perfectionism!)3 practical ways to start building confidenceWhy self-acceptance doesn't mean giving up on improvingHow courage & self-compassion help you have your own backBecause self-confidence isn't built by never messing up.It's built by knowing that even when you mess up, you'll support yourself.[Xena also suggests checking out episode #49: ADHD & Self-esteem]LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Do you struggle to speak up, ask for what you need or worry that advocating for yourself will make you seem “difficult”?In this episode, we’re talking about self-advocacy with ADHD & why learning to have your own back can be especially important when you’ve spent years believing you were the problem.We’ll cover:Why late-diagnosed ADHDers can find self-advocacy so uncomfortableThe difference between being assertive & aggressiveHow self-awareness helps you figure out what you actually needMy 2 questions for navigating difficult conversationsPractical ways to advocate for yourself at work, home & medical appointmentsWhy speaking up is still a win, even when you don’t get the answer you wantedPlus, the story of a very disappointing glass of bubbles that sparked this whole conversation 🥂LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever spend the whole day exhausted, promise yourself an early night… then suddenly it’s midnight & your brain has decided NOW is the perfect time to come alive? In this episode, we’re talking about ADHD & sleep & why getting to bed, falling asleep & actually feeling rested can be such a bloody struggle.We’ll cover:Why some ADHD body clocks naturally run laterBedtime procrastination, time blindness & the “just one more thing” trapWhy nighttime can feel like the only part of the day that’s actually yoursRacing thoughts, stimulation & why lying quietly in the dark doesn’t always helpPractical, ADHD-friendly ways to make sleep easierWhy poor sleep can make ADHD feel even louderWhen sleep problems might be worth looking into properlyPlus, plenty of very relatable examples of what our brains get up to when they should be sleeping.LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM US:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Why can your ADHD brain receive 10 lovely comments… then obsess over the ONE person who criticised you?In this episode, we’re talking about RSD, its lesser-known flip side RRE (Recognition Responsive Euphoria) & why genuine recognition can have such a powerful impact on ADHD brains.We’ll cover:Why rejection & criticism can hit so bloody hardWhy ADHD brains can forget the good & cling to the badHow recognition can boost motivation, energy & confidenceWhy you need to create your own File of Fantastic ShitWhat to put in it & when to use itBecause sometimes your brain needs reminding of the evidence it conveniently forgot…LINKS TO GOOD SH*T FROM XENA:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Ever wondered why one tiny thing can suddenly send you from “I’m fine” to “I absolutely cannot deal with this”?In this episode, we’re talking about the Window of Tolerance & why understanding this is incredibly helpful when you have ADHD.You’ll learn:Why your capacity can look completely different from one day to the nextThe difference between the red zone, blue zone & being inside your windowHow stress, sensory overload, emotions and everyday ADHD demands can push us outside itWhy feeling safe matters to our nervous systemSimple ways to regulate, build capacity & widen your window of toleranceResource mentioned: Breathing Techniques to Reduce Stress and Anxiety - Dr. Andrew Huberman on the Physiological SighCONNECT WITH & WORK WITH XENA:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

Dopamine gets ALL the attention in the ADHD world… but what about endorphins?These little feel-good chemicals can help take the edge off stress, support your mood & make life feel just a bit easier. And the best part? Some of the easiest ways to get them are actually pretty fun.In this episode, we’re talking about:What endorphins actually are & why they matterWhy movement can help shift your ADHD stateThe very legitimate benefits of laughing your arse offHow singing, music & dancing can help when you’re stressed or stuckWhy doing something slightly hard can leave you feeling surprisingly goodHow to bring more play into your life Plus, I’m setting you a simple 7-day Endorphin Experiment so you can find out what genuinely helps YOU feel better.LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM XENA:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!

One Saturday morning, I ended up in the ER saying, “I think I’m having a heart attack.”Two weeks later, I had a diagnosis I’d barely heard of: POTS, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome.In this episode, I’m sharing what happened, what POTS actually is & the interesting overlap researchers are seeing between POTS, ADHD & other neurodivergent conditions.We’ll talk about:The weird symptoms that finally made me realise something wasn’t rightWhat POTS actually does to your bodyThe connection between POTS and neurodivergenceCommon symptoms, triggers and co-occurring conditionsWhat diagnosis & management can look likeWhy understanding what your body is doing can change everythingIf you’ve ever thought, “Why does my body do this weird sh*t?” this one is worth a listen.RESOURCE MENTIONED: https://www.dysautonomianz.co.nz/Important: POTS symptoms can overlap with other medical conditions, so please don’t diagnose yourself from a podcast or smartwatch. If something here sounds familiar, speak with your doctor.LINKS TO MORE GOOD SH*T FROM XENA:*Join Adulting with ADHD your ADHD toolbox & everything you need to work with your brain*Get our ADHD Coach in your pocket! + the ADHD Goal Setting Workbook (life planner tool)*12 Things I wished my Doctor had told me about Adult ADHD*Find out if you might be living with ADHD - Download Symptoms List*Check out Courses & Coaching with Xena*Learn, Inspire, Share & Connect inside our Facebook Community *Come hang out with me on Instagram!