The Frontcourt Female

3:00- what the pain of your path wants for you. 4:00- embracing “toxic culture” after rejection is hurting yourself extra. 6:00- View from Jillian’s court: we do not have to wreck ourselves in pursuit of control in dating, stop the madness!! 7:00- smashing your addiction yes ADDICTION to making what’s wrong for you, right. 11:00- how to stop getting puked on in the vomity tilt-a-whirl of dating. 17:00- unbothered like a human, not a robot: introducing our friend, logic! 20:00- did you think I was JUST gonna blame you? 22:00- “I deserve better”: constantly said, rarely put in action. 24:00- the MONEY question to ask yourself for active rejection healing. 26:00- the reason this person rejected you. (this is a trick) 31:00- I’m the doing-too-much police, and I think you might be guilty. 37:00- overvaluing, fantasy projecting, stories about yourself, all = being addicted to dating crack. 41:00- should your brand of human be for everyone?

View from your court: you refuse to get unstuck in your belief that dating is and always will be a suckfest butt sandwich for you. 2:00- nothing in this world is perfect but one thing: YOUR PATH. 5:15- retraining your brain after getting walloped by love. 10:30- removing the road block your bitch-ass ego built between you and what you want. 14:30- A New Hope: how to surrender, and scan your experience differently! 18:45- check above your head.  Is there a poop cloud hanging there? 23:00- manifestation is nothing without action. 25:00- how to become ok with your “wanting” 28:00- No Negatives, detaching, interrupting yoself: tactics to move through hard feelings. 32:00- why is your rise to power so anticlimactic? 35:00- HARD TRUF: until you rebel against something, it will control you. @hoops.and.heels

1:00: View from Jillian’s court: I may tap things when I drive, but I excel in asking for help. 2:30: The human race are villagers, we are wired for community. 4:00: Not waving but drowning- don’t be that guy. 7:00: Honoring your darkness and co-regulating increases your longevity and looks different ways. 10:00: When you are craving a fairytale: you are actually craving community. 13:00: Where we deprive ourselves of love is where we need it the most. 17:00: You are a lighthouse for others in your emotional strength and your vulnerability - not when you wall off. 20:00: When you’re in the air fryer of suck, you will come out perfectly crispy for your next chapter. 23:00: Go to the edge of your fear of being alone. 25:00: Walking through your greatest pains in community is your healing.

It’s a TOUGHIE for me to tread carefully here. “What you bless blesses you back, what you damn damns you back.” 3:00- Where to start: refuse to make man-shamey dating misery your company. 6:00- Why I do not support female empowerment in the form of fake power over men. 8:00- When you seek ways to hate men, you make zero room for love. 9:00- View from Jillian’s court: I was the girl from The Ring being messy in my man-hating well. 13:00- Idealizing, demonizing, and denying you want love from men dehumanizes them. 18:00- You’re a part of it: how your dehumanizing habit absolves you of your relational role. 22:00- Walk that douche rocket out of the cave. 24:00- TWO DATING CASE STUDIES 1) the events happened TO her. 2) the events happened FOR her. 29:00- Let’s get silly and find evidence of good men. 31:00- How to approach the penis-havers with curiosity, not that they'll do you like your ex did. 33:00- Do you REALLY want dating to be easier? Spoiler alert: YA DON’T, HERE’S WHY! 33:45: If it looks like a dingdong and tastes like a dingdong, IT’S NOT BROCCOLI. 35:50: Are you the character police? 39:00- Spoiler alert: what this man hating business is REALLY about. 41:00- How to (like actually) close this wound and lose nothing by letting a man in. 42:30- Your beliefs about men are really reckonings with your own enoughness. 43:00- New messages we are sending ourselves. @hoops.and.heels for coaching

View from Jillian's court: I (finally) learned how to stop lowering the volume on myself and JUST. LISTEN. 2:25- An awakening can be simple as this: there is another way. 4:30- BIG-ASS Q: how do we answer the call of our deeper knowing? 6:00- Messy: why we devalue what we know we want, in order to do what we’re told is right. 10:00- Self-abandonment over mimosas: spoiler alert, this isn’t normal. 12:00- We prioritize belonging to a group over sense of self, TIL WE DON'T. 14:30- BIG-ASS Q: What truth do I know deep down that I’m not willing to face? 18:00- Using your voice in relationships is to affirm yourself, not receive external affirmation. 22:00- If you require dating approval from your brunch friends, what does that say about where you’re sourcing your power? 25:00- How to distinguish fear from intuition. 27:00- BIG UNPOPULAR TRUF: Perceived powerlessness is your drug of choice. 32:00- BIG UNPOPULAR TRUF: Get more sober to get more intentional. 35:00- Feelings follow behavior: changing your language to internalize self-worth. 37:00- But what if I wanna run? Going to the edge of trust by staying. 40:00- Daily self-trust practices to stuff into your pocket, bra, socks, WHEREVER. 44:00- When a feeling moves through you, how often do you form judgement against it? 46:00- Using feelings in your favor, fear for your benefit, and a self-honesty practice to ascend. 48:30- BIG ASS Q: Whose voice is that? Mine, or scarcity? WHO DO I WANNA ANSWER TO?! 54:00- From your home of self-trust, you bring wholeness into relationship instead of finding it there. Visit me at FrontcourtFemale.com, or on instagram: @hoops.and.heels to partner with me in coaching and take possession of your worth with your own two hands! YOU WIN IN THE END

View from Jillian’s court: ghosting is a silly word that I will reluctantly use. 2:30: Ghosting isn’t new so let’s end the pity party and accept the gift of practicing choice. 5:00: WHY THO do people ghost?! 9:40: Making relational decisions that work in our favor: stop forcing other peoples’ timeline. 13:00: View from Jillian’s court: I’ve been ghosted y’all! I’ve also been a ghoster y’all! Self-responsibility is where the victory lies. 17:00: Clearing with your ghoster 101, clean anger vs aggression. 21:15: Pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice. YOU DECIDE who lives in your brain. 24:00: We can never abandon ourselves, and this truth sets us free with closure. 26:40: BIG questions to ask yourself to get unstuck from an obsessive loop over your ghoster. FIVE (OR MORE CAUSE JILLIAN CAN’T COUNT) WAYS TO PROPEL YOURSELF ACTIVELY FORWARD IN TRUTH AND ALIGNMENT AFTER A SPOOKY GHOSTING: SENTENCE-FINISHERS FOR SELF-CLOSURE AND PRESENCE. Visit me at FrontcourtFemale.com, or on instagram: @hoops.and.heels to partner with me in coaching and take possession of your worth with your own two hands!  YOU WIN IN THE END

View from Jillian’s court: I execute relationships perfectly as the coach that I am, NOT! *Borat Voice* 2:00- Hello, my name is Consistency and I take precedence over constant communication. 4:45- Healing can be found in reclaiming your fun, as opposed fixating on trauma. 8:00- There's a community element to struggling in dating, but we don't have to buy in. Hello from the outside! 9:25- BIG TRUF: we look for evidence for what we want to believe. 10:20- Relational self-awareness helps us stay in reality and and stop letting our feelings choose for us. 14:15- That time when I thought my poop was in a group while single, only to have it sprayed all over the dating scene because I had not resolved all my inner stories. 15:00- Clean up your side of the street, so that your poop does not choose for you. 17:30- Self regulating is checking in with yourself on what meaning you may have have assigned to a lack of text from a hottie. 21:00- Poo hits the fan: what happens when you do not try a different behavior. 23:00- Learn to hold space for discomfort and let people come to you. 25:00- Don’t use attachment theory as an excuse to not change your shitty behavior. 30:00- What are you avoiding in yourself when you want attention just for attention’s sake? Visit me at FrontcourtFemale.com, or on instagram: @hoops.and.heels to partner with me in coaching and take possession of your worth with your own two hands!  YOU WIN IN THE END

View from Jillian’s court- crash courses in how to NOT have fun dating. 1:00: Let us reclaim the FUN we deserve to be having in dating. 4:00: Bad dating experiences aren't all preventable, but TRUST- a bad dating outlook is. How to keep a steady aligned state. 6:00- Set. A bigger. Dating goal. Than finding a relationship! 8:40: Self-abandonment in dating: unfun. Ways we do it, how to stop. 10:00: How to stop operating from a place of lack. Energetic shift hi! 14:30: Dude, you want commitment- taking a seat in your own truth. 16:30: 4 MEGAQUICK UNFUN BELIEF REFRAMES TO TAKE AND USE TO DATE HAPPIER THIS WEEK, LEZ GO 17:00: Dating is about finding the one🚫= dating is about getting rid of the wrong person quickly. 19:00: There are no good options because *insert excuse here*🚫= rejecting scarcity works in my favor. 22:00: I am always going to just screw this up🚫= I have my receipts to steer me successfully. 24:00: My past is going to repeat itself🚫= my past is not my proof. 27:00: Are you dating for an endgame of certainty? Try a shift. 29:00: Dating is about imagination, and you are a badass for embarking. Visit me at FrontcourtFemale.com, or on instagram: @hoops.and.heels to partner with me in coaching and take possession of your worth with your own two hands! YOU WIN IN THE END

View from guest Liz's court: leaving the corporate world and the “box” life Welcome Fearless Female Liz Traines, business coach who helps you create what you want in your business AND life (and reminds you that you're not doing it all wrong like you think!) @liztraines www.Liztraines.com 4:00- Liz's life lessons in breaking the mold: 3 big "NOW I KNOW's" 6:00- the nuances of finding clarity 9:55- BIG OL TRICK QUESTION: how do we find our purpose? 12:30- the big “SHOULD” in the sky 16:00- building a relationship with uncertainty 17:30- the distortion of the masculine and feminine in the workplace 19:00- should work be this draining, or is something wrong? 22:00- what is the difference between burnout and depression? 26:00- do we need a vacation, or do we just need to become best friends with ourselves? 28:00- balancing meeting your internal needs vs going out to make connections 31:00- healing the “pendulum swing” from codependency into the “Beyonce overly-independent woman” archetype 33:00- our power does not lie in people pleasing, NOR does it live in being Beyonce levels of independent! 35:00- embracing your sacred anger but not letting it take over 37:00- does your worth lie in what you achieve, or the fact that you tried? 41:00- “enjoy the process” is a drag- but enjoy the damn process! 43:00- Michael Jordan with amnesia- when you forget to see your own potential 45:00- why do we accept less in our careers than dating? 47:30- hi fellow perfectionists and people that struggle to ask for help! 49:00- Liz bursts your bubble: you’re not doing it wrong.

View from Jillian's court: the void I used to feel is now my buddy old pal 1:00- humans have trouble sitting in their own space. Why we gotta be like this? 4:00- the confusing addiction to needing people around you in order to feel whole 8:00- What we gained from 2020, the year we were not allowed to escape ourselves or our voids 9:00- if the void that you feel could speak, what would it say to you? 10:00- your void is not an obstacle; it’s you rejoining yourself 12:00- turning to the silence; presence with self is the key to your external world having order 14:30- view from my own court- how self-inquiry allowed me to reach a place of content solitude 16:00- the source of all the suffering in the world is your own unquestioned thoughts 20:00- who would you be without the thoughts that cause you suffering? 21:40- it’s never REALLY about scrolling social media, Netflix, or that text back that you’re waiting for- can you text yourself back? 23:00- when you are uncomfortable sitting in your own space, you are making it mean something. Change the meaning Visit me at FrontcourtFemale.com, or on instagram: @hoops.and.heels to partner with me in coaching and take possession of your worth with your own two hands!