Taboo Talk with Sarah

🔑 Main Topics & Takeaways1. Losing yourself while looking after everyone elseRobyn reflects on how years of motherhood, caregiving, teaching and meeting other people's expectations left her questioning who she was outside those roles.2. Finding your voice starts with permissionRediscovering yourself begins with allowing time and space to ask what you believe, what you enjoy and what you want your future to look like.3. Fitting in isn't the same as belongingChildhood bullying and the desire for acceptance can lead people to silence themselves or change who they are. Genuine belonging doesn't require abandoning your identity.4. Understanding coercive control and reclaiming self-leadershipRobyn shares her experiences of abusive marriages and a controlling religious environment, explaining why leaving can be complicated by finances, housing, children and safety. She also discusses her vision for supporting women to rebuild independence.5. Your worth isn't something you have to earnSarah and Robyn discuss the importance of community, honest conversations and recognising that women deserve respect, safety and opportunities simply because of who they are.🗣️ Memorable Quotes“I realised that I didn't actually know who I was anymore.” — Robyn Kent“Fitting in and belonging are not the same thing.” — Sarah Jordan-Ross“Their dreams matter, their voice matters. They matter.” — Robyn Kent⏱️ Key Moments & Timestamps00:00 – Sarah introduces Robyn and how they connected through Voice to Influence01:29 – What has Robyn seen that she can no longer unsee?01:49 – Why women and girls lose their voices and identities03:37 – Robyn's long-term vision for education, prevention and safe spaces05:00 – Childhood bullying, abusive relationships and the search for belonging06:00 – Living alone for the first time and rediscovering her identity07:36 – Who are we beyond the roles we play?08:57 – Recognising when we're living by other people's expectations10:28 – Have we lost our voices or simply learned to keep the peace?11:16 – Giving yourself permission to explore who you are13:49 – What happens when people resist your newfound voice?15:07 – The difference between fitting in and truly belonging17:31 – Designing your own future rather than accepting the status quo19:37 – Why leadership begins with leading yourself21:36 – Robyn's experiences of abusive marriages and religious control24:04 – Why survivors need safety, stability and time to recover26:35 – Rebuilding independence and financial literacy27:19 – How social expectations affect girls from childhood29:53 – Raising boys to respect girls and women31:17 – Sarah shares the safety precautions women routinely consider34:57 – Why community and shared purpose give Robyn hope37:44 – Connection, loneliness and the need for genuine support39:07 – Why saying “I'm fine” can hide how we're really feeling40:56 – Where to connect with Robyn and learn about her programs42:35 – Turning conversations into meaningful action43:25 – Robyn's closing message: You matter, your dreams matter and your voice matters44:36 – Sarah's invitation to keep the conversation going

🔑 Main Topics & Takeaways1. The horizon is always changingLani uses the seasons, compass directions and elements of nature to explore life's transitions. What looks like a fixed ending may simply be the limit of what we can see from where we're standing.2. Growth doesn't always happen in a straight lineLife is cyclical, not linear. Lani explains how we can return to familiar experiences with a different perspective, and why the season that feels most comfortable isn't always the one that helps us grow.3. Grief doesn't have a finish lineReflecting on the loss of her son Jacob, Lani shares how autumn and winter became opportunities for reflection rather than seasons to avoid. Grief remains part of our lives, but our lives can continue growing around it.4. Self-care begins with remembering to breatheCaregiving can be physically and emotionally demanding. Lani encourages people to recognise their capacity, set boundaries and pause for three intentional breaths when life becomes overwhelming.5. Community, family and hope matterFrom becoming a grandmother again to finding supportive communities and sharing her message on new stages, Lani reflects on the importance of belonging, authenticity and keeping family at the centre of her priorities.🗣️ Memorable Quotes“Wherever you are in your journey, there's a different horizon in front of you.” — Lani Almanza“Remember to breathe.” — Lani Almanza“Grief like everything else is cyclical. It's not linear and it doesn't have a get over it point.” — Sarah Jordan-Ross⏱️ Key Moments & Timestamps00:01 – Sarah welcomes Lani back for her third appearance01:33 – The unexpected journey to writing her second book01:55 – The inspiration behind Beyond the Horizon03:28 – New speaking opportunities and caregiving conversations06:55 – Learning when to say no and protect your energy08:26 – What Lani has seen that she can't unsee11:09 – Connection, understanding and choosing collaboration12:54 – Finding communities where you truly belong14:04 – Putting family first and welcoming a new granddaughter16:52 – Exploring the seasons and directions of life's journey18:01 – Why the horizon is always changing20:24 – Are you growing, or staying in your safest season?21:53 – Life as a spiral: returning with a new perspective23:01 – Future book plans and a companion journal24:06 – How Jacob's passing changed Lani's relationship with autumn26:51 – Personal experiences behind the book's seasonal reflections28:15 – Why caregiving touches all of our lives29:30 – Self-care and the importance of three deep breaths32:40 – New speaking opportunities and supportive communities35:06 – The seasons and gifts of grief36:25 – Why grief isn't linear36:52 – Growing around grief rather than leaving it behind38:51 – Giving each other space and grace to grieve differently39:43 – How Lani's grandchildren give her hope41:43 – Where to connect with Lani42:14 – Sarah's invitation to continue the conversation🌟 Guest & ResourcesLani Almanza is a Hawaii-based author, speaker and caregiving advocate whose work explores grief, self-care, emotional resilience and life's transitions.Books discussed:Beyond the Horizon: A Guide for Life's Journey — Lani AlmanzaLani's first book, discussed in connection with her caregiving and grief journeyThe Untethered Soul — Michael A. Singer

🔑 Main Topics & Takeaways1. Your past doesn't have to define youAfter addiction led to his discharge from the Army, Richard found his way back into military service. He reflects on the experiences that shaped him and his belief that meaningful change can begin with a decision.2. Recovery takes awareness and ongoing commitmentApproaching 37 years in recovery, Richard discusses recognising triggers, maintaining boundaries and why addiction isn't simply something a person can switch off.3. Even the strong ones need supportRichard openly discusses his two suicide attempts, ongoing mental health challenges and the importance of telling his wife when he's struggling. Being resilient doesn't mean never needing help.4. Look after the people closest to youRichard recalls realising he was so focused on helping others that he'd overlooked his wife's needs. Sarah and Richard explore listening, empathy, relationships and the importance of supporting those at home.5. Everyone has a comeback storyWhether you're facing addiction, loss, mental health challenges or uncertainty, Richard believes the next step matters. His message is to keep reaching out, keep learning and remember that your story isn't finished.🗣️ Memorable Quotes“The three greatest words in the English language are today I decide.” — Richard Kaufman“Sometimes when you're the strong one, you get tired of taking the arrows for everybody.” — Richard Kaufman“Let's be okay not okay together.” — Richard Kaufman⏱️ Key Moments & Timestamps00:00 – Meet Richard Kaufman, The Comeback Coach02:37 – The man in the mirror and personal growth04:49 – Addiction, arrest and discharge from the Army06:00 – Returning to military service and the impact of 9/1107:11 – Three powerful words: Today I decide09:45 – Understanding addiction and long-term recovery13:15 – Recognising triggers and protecting recovery14:12 – Suicide attempts, mental health and asking for support16:04 – Why even coaches need coaches19:28 – What being The Comeback Coach really means20:57 – The power of showing up one more time23:44 – Why we shouldn't judge people struggling with addiction24:44 – You never know who might need your encouragement26:36 – Helping your family before helping the world27:34 – Love languages, listening and marriage31:27 – Richard's books and supporting veterans32:46 – Podcasting with power, purpose and profit35:27 – Everyone has a story worth sharing36:17 – What gives Richard hope38:13 – Choosing who you become: Today I decide39:53 – Sarah's closing reflections on resilience and connection🌟 Guest & ResourcesRichard Kaufman is a US Army veteran, author, host of the Vertical Momentum Podcast and The Comeback Coach. He shares his experiences of addiction, recovery and mental health to encourage others to seek support and find purpose.Connect with Richard:Richard's links and books: https://linktr.ee/VerticalMomentumLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/richard-kaufman-989757139/Vertical Momentum Podcast (Apple): https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/vertical-momentum-resiliency-podcast-2-0/id1587033757Vertical Momentum Podcast (Spotify): https://open.spotify.com/show/1AVDzGn31ZRpzBdBIREhgoThe Power of Proximity and Mindset with Adrian Boysel: https://open.spotify.com/show/1AVDzGn31ZRpzBdBIREhgoThe Podcasting Blueprint: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0D7NLYP2WVoice To Influence™:Community: https://voicetoinfluence.com/Michael Silvers: https://voicetoinfluence.com/faculty/michael-silversEvents: https://voicetoinfluence.com/events

🔑 MAIN TOPICS & TAKEAWAYS1. Your past does not define your futureRobyn imagined growing old with her husband after raising and homeschooling seven children together. Instead, cancer and the end of her marriage completely changed the picture.Her experience became a lesson in accepting that life doesn't always unfold according to plan—and discovering that a different life can still become an extraordinary one.2. Be careful what you make your identityFor years, Robyn's identity was closely connected to being a wife, mum, homeschooler and the person everybody could depend on.Cancer added another potential label.But Robyn intentionally chooses not to make any single experience the entirety of who she is. She doesn't simply want to be a cancer survivor—she describes herself as a cancer thriver.3. Stop waiting for “someday”Facing mortality created urgency.Robyn realised there were places she wanted to go, experiences she wanted to have and dreams she had continually pushed into the future.Her philosophy became:“Say yes and work out how.”Because sometimes “someday” never comes.4. You don't always have to be the strong oneRobyn reflects on a lifelong pattern of being the helper—the person who didn't want to inconvenience anyone or admit she needed support.Cancer helped her recognise that constantly saying “I'm okay” can unintentionally prevent others from knowing when you actually need them.Vulnerability means sometimes being willing to say:I'm not doing so well. This is hard. I need support.5. You are a human being—not a human doingPerhaps one of Robyn's biggest transformations has been separating her worth from achievement.After decades of doing, caring, achieving and being needed, she's learning the freedom of simply being—knowing she has value without having to earn it.🗣️ MEMORABLE QUOTES“Your past does not define you.”— Robyn Jordan“Say yes and work out how.”— Robyn Jordan“What if this next chapter was the best ever?”— Robyn Jordan⏱️ KEY MOMENTS & TIMESTAMPS00:00 – Sarah introduces her friend Robyn Jordan01:55 – Women living lives of “quiet desperation”03:08 – The life Robyn thought she would have03:59 – Seven children, homeschooling and expecting to grow old together05:39 – Who are you when you're no longer defined by being someone's wife or mum?06:27 – Rebuilding Robyn's identity07:17 – Cancer survivor versus cancer thriver08:31 – When one experience becomes your entire identity09:20 – Robyn's lifelong “hero” role10:00 – “Don't worry about me, I'll be alright”11:00 – Allowing yourself to admit you need support12:00 – Moving beyond “Why me?”14:40 – Understanding someone's experience instead of assuming you know14:48 – The importance of support and community16:00 – Facing mortality and discovering urgency17:00 – “My life mattered too”17:30 – Turning dreams into action18:00 – “Say yes and work out how”18:30 – Choosing adventure and going to Italy19:00 – Realising you're actually living one of your dreams20:04 – Don't reach the end regretting what you didn't do21:00 – Use the special dinner set—don't leave life sitting in the cupboard21:23 – You don't need to know exactly how everything will work22:43 – Discovering she's more capable than she realised23:30 – Growth, contribution and fulfilment24:42 – “I'm human, I stuff up, and that's okay”25:11 – Letting go of needing to get everything right26:00 – Emotional suppression and patterns of always being “the strong one”26:30 – The Seven A's27:18 – Finding a new normal28:02 – Autonomy, attachment, assertion and living by your values28:37 – Stop doing something just because you've always done it31:12 – What does a successful life really look like?32:30 – Community, faith and belonging34:00 – Even high achievers still experience fear and uncertainty35:22 – Community can help unlock what you can't yet see in yourself36:00 – “They gave me wings before I grew my own”37:24 – Robyn's perspective on the Voice To Influence community39:25 – Our mess can become our message39:52 – Who is Robyn without all the labels?40:00 – From constantly doing to intentionally being40:44 – Human being versus human doing41:21 – What Robyn would tell her younger self42:41 – What to remember when you're standing in the wreckage of your old life43:00 – What gives Robyn hope44:00 – We can learn from someone's story without assuming we know exactly how it felt45:06 – Trust the journey and learn to back yourself45:19 – Find communities that help you believe in yourself

🔑 MAIN TOPICS & TAKEAWAYS1. Surviving isn't the end of the storyA crisis may end physically while fear and old patterns remain. Peter's leukemia diagnosis forced him to confront his mortality and become willing to question the life he'd been living.2. We can change how we respond to the wavePeter compares life's challenges to ocean waves. The same wave can knock us over—or, with a different approach, we can learn to navigate it. We don't control everything that happens, but we can explore how we respond.3. Sometimes a crisis makes change possiblePeter was diagnosed with leukemia and Lyme disease on the same day while undergoing a physical to become a volunteer firefighter. He describes the diagnosis as the moment that made him willing to consider changing his beliefs, patterns and direction.4. Look beneath the symptomPeter's work focuses on what he calls the root cause. Rather than only looking at what's happening externally, he encourages people to become curious about the beliefs, emotions and patterns underneath it.5. Forgiveness includes ourselvesPeter's closing message is simple: as long as you have breath, you have the ability to change. Sarah and Peter explore forgiveness, compassion and learning to speak to ourselves with the kindness we'd extend to someone we love.🗣️ MEMORABLE QUOTES“The energy is the same. It's how we navigate the energy that really matters.”— Peter McLaughlin“As long as you have breath, you have the ability to change.”— Peter McLaughlin“Our thoughts have power, our words have power. Be careful how you use them.”— Sarah Jordan-Ross⏱️ KEY MOMENTS & TIMESTAMPS00:00 – What happens after survival?01:55 – Victim mentality versus creator mentality02:20 – “What if the black cloud is actually a mirror?”04:30 – Finding meaning after difficult experiences05:08 – Why painful experiences can become turning points06:00 – Learning to navigate life's waves07:45 – Getting knocked down—and getting back up09:00 – Leukemia and Lyme disease on the same day10:31 – How firefighting changed Peter's perspective on life12:03 – How cancer changes the questions we ask13:51 – Peter's experience around 9/1116:09 – Being told he might have ten years17:00 – Becoming willing to change18:34 – How Peter found hypnotherapy20:01 – Mortality, fear and his young children21:00 – The unexpected path that led to hypnosis23:15 – Travelling to New Mexico and wondering, “What am I doing?”24:40 – Faith, intuition and meaningful coincidences26:00 – Knowing without being able to explain why27:00 – Relationships, growth and challenging each other30:08 – Looking inward when something isn't working31:00 – Victim mentality versus personal agency32:00 – Free will and choosing change33:09 – Experimenting with letting go of guilt35:14 – Hypnosis and looking beneath external symptoms35:42 – Why Peter calls himself a spiritual root-cause coach36:04 – Fixing the cause instead of blowing away the smoke37:10 – How we speak to ourselves38:00 – Self-forgiveness, humility and compassion40:36 – Peter's perspective on ancestral healing44:05 – “As long as you have breath, you have the ability to change”45:36 – Spirituality and the human experience47:09 – What makes an experience “real”?48:34 – The subconscious and our responses to thoughts and stories49:41 – When repeated thoughts begin shaping our experience50:38 – Our thoughts and words have power51:01 – Sarah's biggest takeaways51:46 – Your story might change someone else's life

🔑 MAIN TOPICS & TAKEAWAYS1. Look beneath the symptomsBehaviour, anxiety, substance use and other symptoms may be signalling something deeper. Dr. G explains why understanding underlying trauma matters rather than only addressing what appears on the surface.2. Repeated displacement can damage trustDr. G introduces displacement trauma—what can happen when children repeatedly lose caregivers and attachment bonds through foster care, displacement or other circumstances.3. Safety comes before rebuildingAt Dr. G's shelter, survivors initially receive something deceptively simple: time to rest, sleep and eat without expectations. Creating safety gives the mind and body space to begin recovering.4. Healing includes rediscovering who you areTrauma can leave people defining themselves through what others have told them they are. Recovery means rebuilding self-worth, identity and the ability to decide: Who do I want to be?5. One person believing in you can matterSarah and Dr. G discuss resilience and the enormous difference a supportive person can make. Sometimes one person who genuinely believes in you can change the direction of a life.🗣️ MEMORABLE QUOTES“The moment you control your breathing, you control your life. Because breath is life.”— Dr. Kalyani Gopal“All it takes is one person to care.”— Sarah Jordan-Ross“I have power and have self-agency and I have control over my life. And I have the right to have control over my life.”— Dr. Kalyani Gopal⏱️ KEY MOMENTS & TIMESTAMPS00:00 – What happens when our sense of safety is shattered?01:48 – Meet Dr. Kalyani Gopal02:17 – What Dr. G has seen that she can never unsee03:00 – The devastating reality of child trafficking05:03 – 35 years of witnessing trauma and survival07:14 – What keeps Dr. G doing this work08:00 – When the real story underneath the symptoms is trauma09:13 – Treating symptoms versus addressing the underlying cause11:00 – Why Dr. G still loves the work she does14:00 – Women, identity and losing ourselves while caring for everyone else16:00 – What happens when we finally start caring about ourselves17:58 – Toxic relationships and losing your identity19:13 – Understanding displacement trauma20:00 – Repeatedly breaking children's attachment bonds22:16 – Trauma, abandonment and self-worth22:51 – Emotional regulation and helping the brain feel safe24:49 – Strong Roots, Safe Wings and overcoming adverse childhood experiences25:00 – Why the way we speak to ourselves matters27:40 – Resilience, optimism and responding differently to adversity29:56 – “All it takes is one person to care”31:05 – Why rescue is only the beginning32:05 – Creating a shelter for survivors during COVID33:00 – The first month: rest, sleep, eat and feel safe34:00 – Reparenting and giving survivors time to find themselves35:15 – Remembering who you are beyond what happened to you37:38 – What gives Dr. G hope after seeing so much suffering40:00 – Why the goodness in humanity isn't lost42:15 – Reclaiming self-agency and control43:43 – Dr. G's final message: practise human decency and kindness

🔑 MAIN TOPICS & TAKEAWAYS1. Our imperfections may be what make us humanAs technology becomes increasingly polished and predictable, Terence believes our messy, spontaneous and imperfect moments become even more valuable.The things we may once have tried to hide—the stumble, the emotion, the unexpected reaction—can be exactly what creates genuine human connection.2. Belonging is about participation, not simply being presentTerence's work in immersive experiences has taught him that people don't just want to watch—they want to feel like they matter to what is happening.When people are invited in, included and made to feel valued, an ordinary moment can become something they remember for years.3. People want to feel seen, valued and importantThrough his work designing experiences for major brands, Terence has noticed something simple underneath all the sets, technology and spectacle:The moment people remember is often the moment another human made them feel like they mattered.4. We need permission to play againChildren naturally walk up to other children and ask, “Can I play?”Adults often lose that ability.Sarah and Terence explore how play creates connection without needing an agenda, transaction or outcome—and why creating spaces where adults feel safe enough to be curious, silly and open can be transformative.5. Reaching out is not failureIn one of the most vulnerable moments of the episode, Terence shares calling a crisis helpline and initially feeling ashamed that he'd needed to.He later realised something important: the part of him that reached out wasn't giving up—it was the part fighting to survive.🗣️ MEMORABLE QUOTES“Everything that I thought made me bad actually makes me human.”— Terence LeClere“The reaching out is not failure.”— Terence LeClere“How are you? How are you really?”— Sarah Jordan-Ross⏱️ KEY MOMENTS & TIMESTAMPS00:00 – Why some experiences stay with us long after they're over01:29 – What has Terence seen that he can no longer unsee?02:00 – Technology, AI and what they may reveal about humanity04:00 – Why perfection can actually feel less human05:40 – “Everything I thought made me bad actually makes me human”06:43 – The beauty of being perfectly imperfect08:00 – Sarah shares her son's fear of roller coasters09:23 – Terence's terrifying road experience and how perspective changes an experience11:00 – The difference between fear and an amusement park ride12:00 – Approaching life like an immersive experience14:30 – What exactly is immersive theatre?15:55 – Why the audience is necessary to the experience16:48 – Humans making meaning together18:22 – Immersive experiences, technology and participation19:49 – The difference between attending something and truly being part of it20:00 – Sarah's family experience at an American baseball game21:26 – Creating opportunities for people to feel like they belong22:15 – Why people remember how you made them feel23:04 – Our need for connection and belonging23:30 – Fitting in versus truly belonging24:00 – Meeting people where they are27:00 – Expertise, imperfection and learning from everyone29:26 – Why Sarah created Taboo Talk31:16 – “Nobody ever knew” and the danger of suffering in silence33:00 – Why emotional wellbeing can still carry shame34:00 – Terence opens up about calling a crisis helpline35:00 – Realising that reaching out wasn't failure—it was survival35:58 – Why actors often feel safe being messy and emotional on stage37:30 – The unique power of human-to-human interaction38:30 – A Disneyland elf and the tiny human moment people remembered40:18 – Why AI can support connection but can't replace human connection41:57 – What happened to our sense of community?42:35 – Have adults forgotten how to play?43:18 – Children naturally connecting with strangers through play44:13 – Connection without transaction45:00 – Why play creates permission to explore47:12 – Giving each other permission to be silly, curious and uncertain47:52 – Maybe the point of life is figuring it out together49:05 – The most meaningful immersive experiences of Terence's career50:00 – Creating a deeply personal experience from audience responses51:03 – Working on an immersive experience for Saturday Night Live's 50th anniversary53:00 – What it feels like to become the “host” of SNL54:00 – Why people may want fame because they want to feel important55:00 – Treating every guest like a celebrity56:27 – We don't necessarily want fame—we want to know we matter57:30 – What conversation does Terence wish we had more honestly?57:41 – Why “How are you?” rarely gets an honest answer58:30 – The festival “check-in desk” that became a place for real connection59:00 – The power of a few minutes of genuine connection59:58 – “How are you? How are you really?”1:01:00 – Why the experiences we remember are the ones where we felt seen1:03:28 – Where to connect with Terence1:04:03 – Sarah's reminder: reaching out is strength, not failure

🔑 MAIN TOPICS & TAKEAWAYS 1. A diagnosis can be a relief without becoming your identity After years of searching for answers, Tami's fibromyalgia diagnosis finally gave her something concrete to work with. But Sarah and Tami explore an important distinction: living with an illness isn't the same as becoming the illness. Your diagnosis can be part of your story without becoming your whole story. 2. Invisible illness affects more than the person experiencing it Tami describes being able to “hold it together” for a few days around others, while needing significant recovery afterwards. Even her husband couldn't always tell whether it was a good day or a day when something as simple as watching a movie was too much stimulation. The conversation highlights one of the hardest parts of invisible illness: people can't automatically see what your body is asking you to carry. 3. Management is the process—not the destination Learning to manage symptoms matters. Rest matters. Boundaries matter. But Tami makes an important distinction: “Management is the process that lets us get to the life that we want.” The goal isn't to create a life completely centred around managing illness. Those strategies should eventually help create enough capacity to actually live. 4. Healing can require learning to trust your body again Chronic illness can teach you to fear consequences: If I do this today, what will tomorrow cost me? As health improves, those old boundaries don't necessarily disappear automatically. Tami describes needing to carefully test them, notice what happens and slowly rebuild trust with her body. Her accidentally-rock-climbing story perfectly illustrates the process: cautiously discovering that soreness doesn't necessarily mean another flare is coming. 5. Your new life doesn't have to look like your old one to be beautiful Illness can take things away. Sometimes those things return. Sometimes they don't. But Tami and Sarah explore another possibility: identifying what you loved about the thing you've lost and finding new ways of experiencing that feeling, purpose or joy. As Tami puts it, instead of simply replacing an activity, we can learn to “go after the feeling, not just the thing itself.”     🗣️ MEMORABLE QUOTES “Just because you're not getting answers doesn't mean that answers don't exist. It just means that the people you're asking don't have them.” — Tami Stackelhouse “Management is the process that lets us get to the life that we want.” — Tami Stackelhouse “A diagnosis, regardless of what it is, it's a part of the story. It's not your whole story.” — Sarah Jordan-Ross     ⏱️ KEY MOMENTS & TIMESTAMPS 00:00 – Sarah introduces the central question: how do we accept our bodies without allowing a diagnosis to become our identity? 01:21 – Meet Tami Stackelhouse. 02:00 – Tami shares what life was like before receiving her fibromyalgia diagnosis. 03:00 – “Just because you're not getting answers doesn't mean answers don't exist.” 03:30 – Exhaustion, brain fog and trying to function in a high-stress job. 05:00 – When feeling unwell becomes so normal you forget other people don't feel that way. 06:00 – Tami's determination to find answers. 07:00 – A breaking point: struggling to clean the house and wondering if this was what disability looked like. 08:20 – The hidden reality of invisible illness. 09:20 – How chronic illness affects partners and the people around us. 11:00 – Sarah shares her own experience with chronic fatigue as a teenager. 12:00 – Losing abilities that once came naturally. 13:10 – Spending years looking for answers and questioning whether symptoms were “all in your head.” 14:10 – The relief of finally receiving a diagnosis. 16:00 – Sarah introduces the danger of allowing a diagnosis to become your entire identity. 17:13 – Tami explores the difference between living in a “fibro body” and being defined by fibromyalgia. 18:00 – Tami shares that she hasn't experienced fibromyalgia pain since 2018. 19:00 – Agency versus feeling powerless. 19:40 – Treating your own health journey like an experiment: observe, test, learn and adjust. 21:00 – Learning your body's limits without assuming those limits can never change. 23:00 – How Sarah's chronic illness changed the career she originally imagined. 24:00 – Turning a changed path into a 25-year career in wellness. 25:40 – You might not become who you thought you would—but you can discover who else you are. 27:00 – Chronic illness as another chapter rather than the end of the story. 28:00 – Helping people build new lives after illness. 30:00 – Why agency still matters when life doesn't look the way you want. 31:00 – Your value as a human being has nothing to do with how much you can do. 32:00 – Who are you when nobody is watching? 33:00 – The way we speak to ourselves when nobody else can hear. 35:00 – Why getting better can actually feel frightening. 35:30 – Tami's accidental rock-climbing adventure. 37:00 – “Am I going to pay for this tomorrow?” 38:00 – Normal muscle soreness versus the fear of another flare. 39:00 – Rebuilding trust with your body. 40:00 – Tami's Fibromyalgia Hierarchy of Needs. 41:00 – Moving from symptom management toward self-efficacy and self-actualisation. 41:53 – Management versus living permanently in survival mode. 43:00 – Making health changes so you can actually live your life. 43:30 – Why healing often requires help. 45:30 – Everything you say yes to means saying no to something else. 46:00 – “Say no to say yes.” 47:00 – Sarah shares a funny—and very real—example of managing limited energy. 47:45 – Spoon Theory and the enormous number of decisions involved in chronic illness. 49:00 – Why limited energy can teach us to become intentional about what really matters. 51:00 – Self-care looks different depending on the season of life. 52:00 – Giving something up now doesn't necessarily mean giving it up forever. 53:00 – Sarah shares how her son's MS diagnosis changed what he could do—and how he discovered bass guitar. 54:30 – Different isn't necessarily bad. Sometimes it may even become better. 55:00 – Grieving the activities chronic illness has taken away. 56:00 – Finding what you actually loved about an activity rather than focusing only on the activity itself. 58:00 – Modifying what you love rather than abandoning it completely. 59:20 – Start smaller than you think. 1:00:25 – Tami identifies with the tortoise: little steps still get you where you're going. 1:00:57 – Tami's message to people living with fibromyalgia: feeling better is possible. 1:02:34 – Why hope is where change begins. 1:03:17 – You don't need to see the whole picture—you only need to see the next step. 1:04:21 – Sarah's takeaway: there is always hope and always something you can do. 1:05:00 – Accepting limitations and believing something more is possible can coexist. 1:06:09 – “A diagnosis is part of the story. It's not your whole story.” 1:06:40 – You don't have to wait until you're symptom-free before having a life. 1:07:16 – Sarah closes with the reminder that sharing our stories can change someone else's life.

🔑 Main Topics & Takeaways 1. Wishing can be more than wishful thinking Brownell began researching wishing while world-building for one of her novels. What started as storytelling led her to explore anthropology, psychology, neuroscience and other fields she believes help explain why wishing and its rituals can be powerful. 2. Make your wishes peaceful, positive and purposeful Brownell introduces her Three Ps of Wishing: peaceful, positive and purposeful. Rather than continually focusing on what we don't want, she encourages people to identify the positive outcome they're actually seeking. 3. Goals, prayers and wishes aren't necessarily the same thing Brownell describes goals as generally focusing on what we believe we can control, prayer as often releasing what we can't control to a higher power, and wishes as potentially occupying the space between the two—combining personal action with openness to possibilities beyond our control. 4. Sometimes a “no” redirects us toward something better Not every wish needs to come true exactly as imagined. Brownell describes four possible responses to a wish—yes, no, wait, or something better—and introduces what she calls the expansive pivot: moving beyond one narrowly defined outcome to understand the feelings or deeper needs underneath it. 5. Hope isn't passive For someone who has stopped wishing because life has disappointed them too many times, Brownell's message is compassionate but challenging: allowing ourselves to imagine something different is itself meaningful. Sarah closes the conversation with the idea that wishing isn't about escaping reality—it's about changing it.     🗣️ Memorable Quotes “Wishes need to be peaceful, positive, and purposeful.” — Brownell Landrum “Sometimes no isn't an ending, it's just more information.” — Brownell Landrum “Wishing's not about escaping reality, it's about changing it.” — Sarah Jordan-Ross     ⏱️ Key Moments & Timestamps 00:00 – Sarah introduces hope—not wishful thinking, but the kind that helps us keep moving when life hasn't gone according to plan. 01:10 – Meet Brownell Landrum and enter the world of wishes. 01:26 – Why Brownell began taking wishing seriously. 02:00 – How writing A Love Story to the Universe led Brownell into researching wishes. 02:45 – Is there actually science behind wishing? 03:46 – The different scientific fields Brownell connects to wishing. 04:00 – Why seemingly simple rituals like birthday candles and shooting stars may matter. 04:54 – Neuroplasticity and our ability to continue rewiring our brains. 05:45 – Brownell introduces the Three Ps: peaceful, positive and purposeful. 06:25 – Why our brains look for evidence supporting what we already believe. 07:13 – The reticular activating system and why we suddenly start noticing what we're looking for. 08:59 – The default mode network and why answers sometimes arrive in the shower or on a walk. 10:24 – Survival mode can stop us from asking ourselves what we actually want. 10:53 – Fight-or-flight, cortisol and why anxiety can make creative problem-solving harder. 12:59 – The surprising ideas Brownell encountered while researching wishes. 13:50 – Wishful thinking versus wishing followed by action. 14:24 – The difference between a goal, a prayer and a wish. 15:57 – Brownell's idea of “cosmic collaboration.” 17:31 – Why “I want to feel better” may create a different relationship with change than a number on the scales. 18:32 – Repetition, practice and training our attention toward possibilities. 19:23 – Brownell's unusual sneezing story and why she interpreted it as a message from her father. 20:31 – Human beings as meaning-making machines. 21:12 – Why listening when our bodies “whisper” may matter. 21:30 – Brownell's idea of reverse optimism. 22:29 – Sarah reflects on turning painful experiences into purpose. 23:18 – Jackie Wilkinson and Turning the Tables on Trauma. 24:43 – The “Blue Balloon Phenomenon.” 26:33 – Why strange ideas shouldn't automatically be dismissed simply because they sit outside our current understanding. 29:47 – Staying open to possibilities without necessarily claiming certainty. 31:02 – Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor and My Stroke of Insight. 32:59 – A tangent with an important message: understand your body and notice when something changes. 37:00 – “Our body whispers at us long before it yells at us.” 37:51 – Working with your body instead of constantly fighting against it. 39:39 – Brownell explains the Cosmic Wish Experiment. 40:00 – Creating “wish circles” and practising a collective wish for eight weeks. 41:43 – Can a wish change because you changed? 41:59 – The four possible responses: yes, no, wait, or something better. 43:30 – The expansive pivot: looking underneath a specific wish to understand what you're truly seeking. 45:01 – Legally Blonde and the difference between what we want and what we need. 45:45 – Cast Away as another example of wants, needs and unexpected redirection. 47:41 – Unanswered prayers and blessings we sometimes only recognise in hindsight. 49:21 – What Brownell would say to someone who has stopped wishing altogether. 50:00 – How hope can spread socially when people begin believing something different is possible. 51:33 – What could happen if we focused more on what connects us than what separates us? 52:34 – One minute a day of being peaceful, positive and purposeful. 52:48 – Sarah's closing thought: wishing isn't about escaping reality; it's about changing it.

🔑 Main Topics & Takeaways Why feeling comfortable in your own skin is about far more than appearance How the constant message of being “not enough” or “too much” affects women's confidence Why ageing is a privilege to embrace rather than something to fear The guilt women carry and why sometimes you need to intentionally “empty your cup” Why vulnerability, community and honest conversations remind us we're not alone How defining success and making choices on your own terms can change the way you experience life   🗣️ Memorable Quotes   “If someone tells you you're too much, tell them to go find less.” “It takes a village to raise a woman.” “Hope isn't in the definitive. Hope is in the opportunity.”   ⏱️ Key Moments & Timestamps   00:00 – Introducing Margot and the conversation about confidence, identity and self-worth 01:33 – What does it really mean to feel comfortable in your own skin? 01:42 – Why women are constantly made to feel like they're “not enough” 02:12 – Looking in the mirror and learning to be kind to yourself 03:21 – How our relationship with our skin reflects our relationship with ourselves 04:26 – Why ageing is a blessing, not something to fear 05:26 – Three generations of women and their different experiences with ageing 06:45 – Living in the moment instead of worrying about future imperfections 07:12 – Margot's 103-year-old grandmother's philosophy on enjoying life 07:54 – What happens when we let people see what's really behind the curtain 08:00 – The pressure women feel to wear every hat and never drop the facade 09:00 – Why a mum shouldn't feel guilty about simply enjoying a cup of coffee 10:07 – Taking time for yourself can make you a better mum, partner and person 10:42 – “You have to empty a cup to fill it” 11:12 – Choosing what you want to refill your life with 12:00 – Why we often wait for burnout before deciding something needs to change 13:09 – The lessons Margot learned from looking up at rock bottom 15:35 – Letting go of guilt and accepting that none of us can carry everything 16:03 – Why “it takes a village to raise a woman” 16:20 – We were never designed to do life alone 16:48 – Redefining what strength looks like for women 17:35 – Why vulnerability and asking for help are strengths, not weaknesses 18:00 – The damaging pressure to appear perfect 19:14 – How changing ourselves to fit in can make us forget who we really are 19:20 – “If someone tells you you're too much, tell them to go find less” 20:46 – The women we compare ourselves to may be comparing themselves to us 21:15 – Finding the tribe that fits your unique “vibe” 22:28 – Social media and our universal desire to belong 23:00 – Why belonging and fitting in are not the same thing 25:25 – Why sharing our insecurities helps other people feel less alone 27:13 – Asking better questions instead of pretending we have all the answers 28:15 – The women who fought to give future generations more choices 29:06 – Margot shares her grandmother Elizabeth Grant's extraordinary story 29:06 – Surviving a V-2 rocket attack during World War II and suffering facial injuries 30:00 – Refusing to accept that nothing could be done for her damaged skin 31:00 – The discovery that ultimately led to Elizabeth Grant's signature skincare ingredient 32:00 – A conversation with actress Vivien Leigh that helped spark a business idea 33:02 – Launching one of the earliest facial serums in 1948 34:00 – Knocking on the doors of Selfridges and refusing to accept rejection 35:00 – “If someone closes the door, go through a window” 36:00 – Rebuilding the company after bankruptcy 37:00 – Margot's mother being rejected by 27 banks before receiving a $5,000 loan 37:36 – Generations of women refusing to be kept small 39:12 – “Get the job, then figure out how to do it” 40:13 – Why Margot doesn't believe in “can” and “can't” 41:23 – What gives Margot hope for the future 42:00 – Women supporting women instead of pulling each other down 43:00 – Margot opens up about IVF and miscarriage 43:30 – The importance of talking openly about experiences that make people feel alone 44:00 – “Do you want me to listen or do you want my opinion?” 45:00 – Taking ownership of our choices and becoming the conductor of our own lives 45:12 – “Hope isn't in the definitive. Hope is in the opportunity.” 45:53 – Why silence around miscarriage doesn't make the experience easier 47:00 – The need for better conversations and research around women's health 48:24 – The pressures facing teenagers today 49:00 – Looking beneath bullying and asking what may be driving the behaviour 50:13 – Raising good humans and creating a kinder ripple effect 51:11 – Margot's final piece of wisdom about what really defines us 52:43 – Where to connect with Margot and Elizabeth Grant Skincare 54:46 – Why life doesn't stop at 40, 50, 60, 70 or beyond 55:22 – Sarah's closing reminder to become comfortable in your own skin and share your story