Rebel Ninja Parent Series

You watch your child hang back while the other kids play, and your heart hurts. They want a friend. They just don’t know how to start.Coach Andrew sits down with a mom and her 6 year old to talk about making friends and what to do when a friend is not kind. You will hear why shy children can look cold by accident. You will also hear a simple plan that helps them start a talk and keep it going.Learn why shy body language makes other kids think your child wants to play alone.Hear a 6 year old practice a friendly hello with Coach Andrew.Discover how asking questions and listening keeps a new friendship going.Teach your child to stay calm and control their face when someone is mean.Understand why bullies bully, and how kindness can help them feel better.If your child wants friends but feels stuck, this episode gives you a place to start tonight. (00:00) - Intro (00:34) - Listener thank you notes (03:19) - Meet Xander and his mom (09:12) - Why making friends feels hard (12:14) - Why shy kids look cold by accident (17:55) - The two Cs for making friends (18:27) - Inside and outside compliments (21:42) - Finding something in common (24:02) - Practice: meeting a new friend (28:57) - When you do not share the same interest (34:20) - A mom on rejection and friend switching (36:10) - What if a new friend is mean (37:23) - Calm comebacks: what bullies want (40:30) - The two circles of control (45:59) - The repeat technique (48:44) - Name calling is an opinion, not a fact (51:15) - Kick the mean words out (53:17) - Why bullies bully (54:51) - Use kindness on a bully (56:38) - Advice for parents

Your child makes one small mistake and decides something is wrong with them. Maybe they say they are the worst, and nothing you say seems to stick.Today I share what I teach my 9 year old students about this. Kids will always compare, so we teach them who to compare to. You will walk away knowing how to help your child stop letting wins and losses decide who they are.How to explain self image to a child in words they actually remember.Show your child why one mistake makes them a learner, not a loser.Play a silly game where you act as the mean voice and your child talks back.Draw two circles that separate what your child can control from what they can’t.Ask questions instead of giving orders so your child finds the answer.If your child is hard on themselves right now, this one gives you real words to say and a game to try tonight. (00:00) - Intro (00:30) - A student who compares herself to her twin (02:58) - It is not too late at any age (03:28) - Self image is what you think of yourself (04:28) - Why this is a self esteem problem (05:55) - Believing the truth or a lie (07:03) - Growth mindset and fixed mindset (09:00) - Are you a loser or a learner (09:57) - Why a win should not lift your self image (13:49) - Compare to who you were yesterday (14:47) - The Mount Everest story (18:48) - No one controls your self image but you (20:15) - Phase two: thinking about your thinking (22:11) - The burglar on the couch (23:10) - Meet the inner critic (25:31) - How to play the game with your child (34:06) - The two circles of control (38:55) - The woman who lived past 100 (42:43) - Bonus tip: help without a fight (46:56) - Ask a question, then stop talking

Your child gets nervous before anything new, and you worry other kids will notice. Today a 10 year old and his mom join me to explain what really scares kids and why bullies pick the kids they pick.You’ll hear a kid explain it in his own words. His mom shares what helped him most. I also teach a simple way to help a hurting bully instead of fighting back, plus a game you can play at home tonight.Learn the two reasons a bully picks a target.See what a confident kid looks like, from the back to the eyes to the face.Use a compliment and a question to meet a new kid.Practice 80 percent listening and 20 percent talking.Try speaking life with a kid who is hurting others.If your child freezes around new kids or worries about bullies, this is the one to press play on tonight. (00:00) - Intro (00:42) - Meet Aaron and Mandy (03:05) - Why new things feel scary (08:42) - Hurt people hurt people (10:34) - Andrew's story of being bullied (12:07) - Two reasons bullies pick a kid (13:03) - How rumors work behind your back (14:03) - What confident looks like (15:40) - The what if thoughts (19:07) - Mom on the talk to a stranger challenge (21:05) - Why compliments work (22:13) - Real proof beats saying it (25:21) - 80 percent listening (27:15) - How listening builds trust (30:39) - The weed and the root problem (34:52) - Speaking life into a bully (37:11) - The Question Challenge game (38:39) - Better questions to ask (45:29) - Compliment first, then a question (50:11) - Advice for parents

Your child comes home and asks, “How come the other kids don’t want to play with me?” It breaks your heart, and you want to fix it fast.Today I share how I helped four girls who felt shy, left out, or stuck in friend drama. The answer is not trying harder to fit in. It’s helping your kid see herself as a leader, and leaders are just really good helpers.Learn why people pleasing and hiding are the same fear of rejection.Use the wolf pack story to show your kid why the leader walks in the back.Tell the 12 oranges story so your child learns you can’t share what you don’t have.Show your kid how to compliment, volunteer, and speak life into other kids.Try the best friend challenge to help a shy kid feel warm around new people.A kid who sees herself as a helper stops waiting for someone else to say hi. (00:00) - Intro (01:02) - The three pillars of confidence (02:59) - The 7 year old who felt left out (03:46) - People pleasing vs hiding (04:15) - Shy in groups and with new kids (05:12) - Left out of a birthday party (05:56) - What is a leader's self image? (08:31) - Leaders are really good helpers (10:34) - All parents are teachers (13:23) - The wolf pack drawing (14:40) - Why the leader walks in the back (17:30) - You can't help if you don't know how (20:13) - The 12 oranges story (23:06) - Compliment the girl who left you out (24:57) - Volunteering and the five second rule (26:01) - Creating a spark in other kids (28:57) - Speak life into others (31:22) - Act warm, not cold (32:53) - The spotlight effect loop (35:58) - The best friend challenge

You can't follow your child to school. You can't stop a mean kid from saying something cruel. But you can make sure your child knows exactly what to do when it happens.Coach Andrew walks you through a real coaching call with an 11 year old girl who was about to start a new school. You'll hear the exact words, questions, and pictures he used to help her feel strong and calm. Every tool is simple enough to practice at home tonight.Explain why bullies bully so your child stops taking it personally.Show your child why bullies pick the "hurt zebra" and how to stop being an easy target.Practice faces and tone in the mirror so your child looks and sounds calm.Use the repeat technique, the uncomfortable flip, and the question technique to shut teasing down.How to help a kind child speak up without feeling like the bad guy.Your child doesn't need to be tough to stand strong. They just need the right tools before the first hard day. (00:00) - Intro (00:51) - Keep it super simple: the KISS method (02:26) - Free bully videos in the Rebel Ninja app (06:12) - Why bullies bully: hurt people hurt people (08:28) - Bad kids or kids making bad choices? (09:15) - Why empathy comes first (11:05) - The two reasons a bully targets your child (11:49) - The hurt zebra (13:20) - Why being a threat brings rumors (15:14) - The diary story (16:34) - Why ignoring a bully doesn't work (18:22) - Why fighting back isn't the answer (19:43) - Step 1: Control your face (21:34) - Logical kids and facial expressions (24:45) - Step 2: Tonality (27:17) - Step 3: What to say (29:08) - The repeat technique (31:21) - The uncomfortable flip (32:31) - The question technique (34:10) - Why telling the teacher is okay (37:29) - Recap (38:43) - How to reach Coach Andrew

You tell your kid what to do. They dig in. You say it again, louder. Now you are both stuck and nobody is listening.Nancy is a homeschool mom of two girls, ages 5 and 8. When her oldest refused jiu jitsu, telling got her nowhere, but a few calm questions found the real reason. You will learn the exact questions she uses to walk her kids out of big feelings and into clear thinking.Name the feeling out loud and let your kid say yes or no.Offer the wrong answer first and the right answer last.Watch for eyes looking down, because it means something is bugging them.Keep "what do you mean?" and "tell me more" in your back pocket.Use a caring, worried tone so your questions never sound like a quiz.Stop pushing harder and start asking better, because your kid already has the answer inside. (00:00) - Intro (00:24) - Meet Nancy (02:58) - What is a Fire Ninja? (04:47) - Asking instead of telling (05:46) - When empathy made it worse (08:18) - Why telling feels faster but isn't (11:14) - Saying sorry to your kids (13:07) - The emotions room and the making sense room (15:18) - The jiu jitsu story (21:16) - Invisible walls (23:13) - When their eyes look down (24:06) - Why questions work (26:18) - When kids beat themselves up for being upset (28:16) - Tell their story first (30:15) - Two back pocket phrases (30:32) - The sourdough lesson (32:19) - Wrong answer first, right answer last (34:02) - When they pick the wrong answer on purpose (35:30) - "This sounds like it takes forever" (36:55) - Role play: trying a dance class (41:21) - Tone matters (45:57) - What's happening in the brain (47:51) - Nancy's advice for parents

Your child freezes when another kid is mean. Or they keep a friend who treats them badly, because speaking up feels like being mean.Teaching boundaries only fixes the surface. Coach Andrew digs into why kind kids stay quiet and finds a deeper fear underneath: being left alone. It starts with a real moment from a coaching call and a simple drawing on a whiteboard. Then he shows how kids build real confidence so they can speak up or walk away without you stepping in.Learn the chain of fears that makes a kind kid freeze.See the difference between being alone and feeling lonely.Understand how a scarcity mindset keeps kids stuck with friends who hurt them.Play the Question Detective game at home with just two W's and three topics.How to use the spotlight effect to calm nerves before your child talks to someone new.Your child does not need you to fight their battles, they need the skills to handle their own. (00:00) - Intro (01:50) - Why kids freeze when someone is mean (03:25) - The first fear: not wanting to sound mean (05:35) - The deeper fear: "I don't want to be alone" (07:15) - Alone vs lonely, the whiteboard drawing (10:05) - Why kids argue at home but not with friends (11:45) - Fixed mindset and the chain of whys (13:35) - Scarcity mindset and the 100 Nidos question (16:00) - Why affirmations don't fix scarcity (19:15) - The priceless pancake and what "value" means (21:10) - Tactical empathy and the Question Detective (25:20) - Two W's and three topics, playing the game (28:10) - Make it about you and you lose (31:00) - The introvert light switch (33:30) - The spotlight effect (38:25) - Chase butterflies or build a garden

Is your kid dealing with a friend who used to be their person and now treats them like an outsider? It is one of the hardest things to watch as a parent, and most of the advice out there does not actually work.Coach Andrew shares a framework he built after testing it with his own students, and it works whether your child is five or fifteen. You will learn how to help your child build their own team of real friends, so one jealous or manipulative kid can never turn a whole group against them.Here is what you will take away:Learn why the kids excluding your child are usually not bad kids, just scared onesUnderstand the North Star that makes a kid magnetic instead of a people pleaserUse the two C's, compliment and common, to get past any wall between your kid and a new friendTeach your child to be a question detective who asks what and why instead of yes or no questionsShow your kid how giving without expecting anything back builds a team that has their back no matter whatYour child does not need to be the most popular kid in the room. They need a team that shows up when it matters. (00:00) - Intro and 1570 downloads thank you (02:12) - Todays topic and the Team Bob idea (04:37) - Why kids exclude a friend (06:54) - The North Star, give not take (08:48) - Bad kid or bad choices (11:01) - The wall called in grouping (12:56) - The two C's, compliment and common (14:20) - Practicing compliment and common (16:23) - Being a question detective (18:16) - Get them talking about themselves (20:13) - Identity problem versus skill problem (22:22) - Two rules after a compliment (23:31) - Show you are interested, not just interested (25:34) - What it means to build Team You

Your kid's best friend became the bully. Now the whole group runs the other way, and making a new friend feels impossible.Coach Andrew breaks down what happened after an eight year old's closest friend turned on him, and why he started rating making new friends a ten out of ten scary. The fix had nothing to do with handling bullies. It came down to giving him real evidence that he is worth being friends with.Spot the spotlight effect before it stops your child from talking to anyone newLearn why telling your child to just go make friends can backfireSee how a simple compliment challenge builds real confidence one step at a timeDiscover why the question challenge turns any kid into a social magnetHow to help your child leave every person better than they found them, and why that changes everythingIf your child still trusts the friend who let them down, or freezes around anyone new, this one is for you. (00:00) - Understanding Bullying and Its Impact on Children (03:09) - The Scarcity Mindset and Fear of Making Friends (06:10) - The Spotlight Effect: Anxiety in Social Situations (09:17) - Shifting Focus: From Self to Others (12:05) - Games to Build Social Skills in Children (17:56) - The Importance of Open-Ended Questions (24:10) - Building Confidence Through Social Skills

Your kid was having so much fun. Then you said it's time to go, and the fight that followed felt way bigger than turning off a screen or leaving the house ever should.In this one, Coach Andrew breaks down the real reason small transitions turn into full meltdowns, and teaches the exact skill that stops it before it starts. You will learn why telling a kid to breathe does not work in the moment, and what actually calms them down instead.Here is what you will walk away with:Learn why your kid hears the word stop and feels like you hate them. Discover why breathing exercises fail in the middle of a meltdown. Play a simple game that trains this skill through fun, not lectures. Hear a real coaching session where a child argues his own inner critic into defeat. Find out why this exact skill worked on a two year old.If transitions turn into fights in your house, tonight is a good night to press play. (00:13) - Understanding Children's Meltdowns (03:19) - The Role of Metacognition in Emotional Regulation (06:08) - Teaching Metacognition: The Ant Squasher Game (12:04) - Developing Inner Critic Awareness (17:57) - Shifting Perspectives: From Mad to Glad