In All Honesty

29 Episodes

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  Apologies: Why do I not believe people when they apologize?

  7/7/2021

  40:13

  Why do I not believe people when they apologize?How do I forgive myself and know I won't do it again?Should I continue to persist when someone doesn't accept your apology?How do I ask for an apology for something that happened ages ago?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on apologies and explains what a good apology involves. She discusses apology languages and why she doesn't completely agree with this model but how it is helpful to construct your own apologies. She talks about the phrase "if they were really sorry, they wouldn't have done it in the first place" and how some people need time to realise when they've done something wrong and some people realise instantly. She discusses the difference between real apologies and when apologies are just words. She also gives tips for people who hate apologising and how to move your ego out of the way. She also discusses a scene in Ginny and Georgia about how jealousy between parents and children can arise and how to process that jealousy.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Red Flags: Is it a red flag if they never ask about me?

  6/30/2021

  49:26

  Is it a red flag if they never ask about me?What are the warning signs for emotional unavailability?Are there any clues that someone is going to ghost?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on red flags and defines what a red flag is. She explains the actual meaning of red flags and why this word should not be used to describe everything. She discusses how the idea of foreseeing every red flag is flawed and why we need to have a balance of being aware of red flags and not being too overanalytical. She explores the concept of conscious dating and why this is the key to a healthy balance. Within this episode, she also gives you tips on how to be conscious enough to spot red flags. She also discusses a scene in Real Housewives of New York and how our fantasies create contradictions in the words we say when we aren't being honest with ourselves.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Breakups: How do I know I made the right decision?

  6/23/2021

  36:39

  Can you still stay friends if one person likes the other and it's not reciprocated?Should you end it if they don't want kids and you do?How do you know your breakup was the right decision?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on breakups and discusses the importance of making sure breakups are clean breaks. She talks about whether you actually should stay friends after a break-up and why it really doesn't matter who breaks up with who. She discusses why breakups should be a discussion and not a finite conversation and whether you are too young to make a decision about kids. Within the episode, she also gives tips on how to heal from a breakup and why you need to take time to grieve the future you once had. She also discusses an episode of Ugly Betty and why boundaries are so necessary for breakups and why it is unfair to force a friendship when both people are not invested.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Family: If I cut them out, will I regret it when they die?

  6/16/2021

  39:38

  If I cut family out, will I regret it when they die?What can you do when family treat me like I'm stupid?Is it OK to set boundaries over emails and text?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on family relationships and discusses how we should hold the same standards of treatment in our familal relationships than any other relationship in our life. She talks about how the media has perpetuated this idea of "perfect families" and how Christmas enhances this idea. She shows how to set boundaries within family relationship and talks about how we learn boundaries most from our parents. She unpicks whether you can be good at setting boundaries if you are not good at receiving it and also questions how the idealised view of parents means we tend to romanticise our childhoods.Within the episode, she also gives tips on how to improve communication within your family and why you shouldnt' accept 'how things have always been' for future communication. She also discusses an episode of Station 19 that highlights how we can talk about the intersections of race and the racism that the Asian community are facing due to Corona Virus.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Sex: How Do You Have The Consent Conversation Without Turning Them Off?

  6/9/2021

  38:35

  How do you have a consent conversation without turning them off?What do you do when penetration just doesn't work?Can you have a casual relationship without moving too quickly?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on sex and discusses how we focus too much on the penis and penetration in sex. She talks about how we need to prioritise female pleasure more and why the consent conversation is simply boundary setting. She talks about why so many women find penetration uncomfortable and why the normalisation of sex hurting for women stems from the idea that a woman's first time is going to hurt. She gives you tips on how to be more in your body during sex and why it's important to stay out of your head. Within the episode, she also shares how to get into a casual relationship and why unsolicited dick pics don't ever need to be tolerated. She also discusses a scene in One Tree Hill that highlights the problem with rushing into marriage to heal a childhood wound and gives a key warning sign of moving too quickly.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Life Changes: What If I Can't Cope With The Responsibility?

  6/2/2021

  39:02

  When you change a lot, is it normal to want to change your friends?How do you stop worrying about future responsibility coming into your life?And what do you do when you aren't sure who you are anymore?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on life changes and asks that we notice the distinction between the adjustment process vs a settled change. She talks about how changes in your life may result in unexpected changes in the relationships and dynamics with the people in your life. She talks about the changes we have all faced in the pandemic and gives tips on how to manage change and create certainty if you feel unsafe. She gives you tips on how to stay in the moment, not needing to define every stage in your life and having more flexibility in life. She also discusses a scene in Scandal that highlights why it is important to have standards and know how you deserve to be treated. We also get into a conversation about chakras and how that can affect your energy.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Infidelity: Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater?

  5/26/2021

  33:07

  How do you trust a new partner when the last one cheated on you?Is it true that "once a cheater, always a cheater"?And how do you end it with someone if the trust is broken for good.In this episode, Michelle answers questions on infidelity and talks about why what constitutes as cheating will change for every person. She talks about how cheating and infidelity relates to boundaries and whether people really can change. She talks about the lasting impact cheating can have on a relationship and why staying in a relationship isn't always a bad thing. She gives you tips on how to heal if you were cheated on and also why it might have a lasting impact on your trust in other relationships in your life. She gives you practical tips on what to do if you decide to stay in the relationship and how you can know if they are truly invested in changing or it is just words. She also discusses a scene in Desperate Housewives that brings up the idea of comparison and why when we compare ourselves to others, we lose all context.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Self Worth: How Do I Stop Self Sabotaging Myself?

  5/19/2021

  36:58

  What do you do when you feel like you can never do enough personal development?How do you stop self-sabotaging your own success?And what do you do if you feel like an imposter when you are confident?In this episode, Michelle answers questions on self worth, what it is and how to build your own. She talks about how a lot of the self worth conversation is very lofty and why people need practical advice in order to actually create the changes in their life. She talks about imposter syndrome is an illusion and why it's important to let personal development work resonate emotionally and not just intellectually. She gives you tips, exercises and tools you need in order to grow your self worth each day and shares with you a new exercise she is using herself to heal inner wounds from childhood. She also discusses a scene in The Bold Type and talks about why we need to be having race conversations, even if they aren't perfectly eloquent and articulate.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Perfectionism: How Do I Address My Fear Of Failure?

  5/12/2021

  37:17

  In this episode, Michelle answers questions on what to do if you feel like your friends expect you to be perfect, how do you handle someone else's perfectionism affecting you in group projects and how to heal how fear of failure so it doesn't affect your life anymore. She talks about how she believes perfectionism is used as a protection from the ego and how the term 'perfectionist' is used to push others down and feel better about yourself. She discusses how a number of things are hiding behind the term 'perfectionism' and gives you her evidence and proof as to why you should remove this word from your vocabulary altogether. She gives you tips on how to squash perfectionism immediately and gives you practical exercises to get started. She also discusses a scene in New Amsterdam which demonstrates how a boundary can be used as a wall when you are too scared to be intimate.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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  Single Life: Am I Happy Single Or Too Scared To Date?

  5/5/2021

  38:38

  In this episode, Michelle answers questions on how to handle jealousy at other people happy in love, whether people actually do change their mind about wanting a marriage and kids and when being single is just a disguise for not wanting to make yourself vulnerable to date. She talks about why she had a period of being consciously single and how that benefitted her life and why if you wouldn't date yourself, you still have things to work on before you are ready for a relationship. She gives you tips on how to be happy single and talks about what the difference is between walls and boundaries. She also discusses a scene in The Hills which brings up the dilemma of what do you do if your partner is refusing to change.For more information, follow Michelle on Instagram @ScarredNotScared See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.