379: Stage Three of the Five Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough
In this episode, we delve into Stage Three of the Five Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough. If you're unsure which stage you're in, by the end of this episode, you'll have a clear understanding. We cover:
The feelings, personas, and experiences typical of Stage Three.
Why Stage Three is the most common stage where people get stuck.
The consequences of staying in Stage Three and how to move forward.
Key Points
Understanding Stage Three
Common Feelings and Experiences: Stage Three is characterized by small self-benefits like being right, blaming others, and getting sympathy without having to rebuild trust.
Negative Thought Patterns: The mind starts believing destructive thoughts, leading to deeper entrenchment in Stage Three.
Energy Attraction: Like energy attracts like energy, resulting in circumstances and relationships that confirm the negative state.
Personas in Stage Three
Alex: Struggles with unanswered questions and the fear of confronting raw emotions, leading to a loop of indecision.
Jordan: Uses distractions like TV, food, and alcohol to avoid the pain of betrayal.
Taylor: Experiences resignation, believing life will never get better and settling into a colorless routine.
Morgan: Feels profound exhaustion and lethargy, unable to muster the energy for significant change.
Symptoms and Consequences
Post Betrayal Syndrome: Symptoms appear in Stage Two and persist into Stage Three, where they are often medicated and suppressed rather than healed.
Therapy and Support Groups: Without true transformation, therapy and support groups can become places where individuals stay stuck by repeatedly rehashing their stories.
Numbing, Avoiding, Distracting: Common tactics to avoid dealing with raw emotions, leading to long-term habits that reinforce the Stage Three state.
Moving Beyond Stage Three
Recognizing the Trap: Understand that Stage Three is a trap, likened to quicksand, making it one of the hardest stages to leave.
Letting Go: To move to Stage Four, one must let go of the benefits and familiarities of Stage Three.
Transformation Begins in Stage Four: Real healing and transformation start in Stage Four, where new beginnings and true growth occur.
Practical Steps and Resources
The PBT Institute: Offers daily live classes, programs, masterclasses, and an incredibly supportive community to help you move through the Stages.
Books: "Trust Again" and "From Hardened to Healed" provide deeper insights and practical advice for those stuck in Stage Three.
Community Support: Engage with others who are also on the journey from betrayal to breakthrough, fostering mutual growth and support.
Conclusion
Stage Three is a challenging but surmountable part of the betrayal recovery process. By recognizing the signs, understanding the personas, and utilizing the right resources, you can move forward to Stage Four and beyond, achieving true transformation and healing.
Connect with Us
Website: The PBT Institute
Books: Trust Again | From Hardened to Healed
Join us in the next episode as we continue exploring the stages and providing insights to help you on your journey from betrayal to breakthrough.
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