#41 - Nadja Lasbeck - How To Identify Your Sexual Needs, Common Kinks You Shouldn’t Be Ashamed Of & How Childhood Trauma Blocks Joy - Intimacy Coach/Lecturer

The idea of doing our story work, probably seems like an abstract and intangible thing for the vast majority us, isn’t it just new age jargon left for likes of silicon valley founders or permanently self-reflective podcasters? It’s often said that to find happiness we must find meaning in our life, or a sense of purpose, but, you can’t have either before knowing your story and what ultimately drives you to achieve things in life. And if this is the case then that would suggest that you cannot achieve happiness without first knowing - or finding - your story. Today’s guest Dr Joey Liu is renowned for helping her clients do their sacred story work, she’s also a mother, wife, coach, educator, writer and much more. The conversation is quite deep in parts as we tapped into some self reflective work and insecurities I’ve had in looking at my own story as it relates to the podcast and my motivation to continue having these conversations. The start is a little bit different as we begin with a guided meditation by Joey. So if you are driving, please do not participate and just skip through this using the chapters. But if you are in a safe place to do, so I welcome you to join us, it’s a really way to kick off the episode. Joey, and I discuss: Kundalini Yoga Knowing your values before stating your vision Joey and I's experience’s of being told that we think too much How to trace negative self-talk, back to where it came How to hear and trust your inner voice. The difference between community and Society Joey's tips on how to find a community How Joey manifested her husband And much more Please enjoy my conversation with Dr Joey Liu. #storywork Chapters 00:00:00 Dr Joey Liu Intro 00:01:44 Guided Meditation & Breathwork Session 00:10:59 The Importance of Breath in Meditation 00:13:44 Understanding Kundalini Yoga 00:18:25 Why Storytelling is important for Leaders & Founders 00:25:58 Jason's Reflections On Podcast Vision & Motivation 00:35:50 Neurodivergence: Am I masking or being authentic? 00:44:51 Manifestation 00:56:40 Jason's Selfishness Dilemma: Vulnerability & Authenticity 01:14:02 Understanding Community vs. Society 01:17:57 Tips on Finding Community 01:28:42 How Joey Found Love Through Manifestation & Letting Go 01:36:00 Reflections on Childhood and Nature 01:41:28 Lessons from Failure and Growth 01:48:35 Why You Should Do Work For Your Friends & The Value of Relationships in Work 01:54:09 Joey's Self & Audience Reflection Questions 02:05:45 End ***LINKS*** Dr Joey Liu’s Instagram: https://bit.ly/4fdMZOg Dr. Joey Liu Coaching & Courses: https://bit.ly/3zTq0I8 MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj

My guest today is Fraser Minnican, he’s a former international-level swimmer, husband & tri-athlete who recently became champion of Iron Man Portugal in October of 2024 Time stamped chapter & subtopic list 00:01:26 Fraser’s Background, Upbringing & Time At University - Swimming At An International Level What Fraser’s upbringing was like outside of his swimming endeavours The influence his father had on his sporting career If he enjoyed an upbringing heavily centred around sport Why he decided to quit swimming at the national level Why he prioritised his degree over his swimming career How It Felt To Tell His Dad He Was Retiring From Swimming 00:28:56 Life After Swimming & Finding Iron Man How Many Races A Year Fraser Believes Is Optimal For Him 00:46:54 A Championship Winning Season How he struggled for motivation mid season What was different to the season before? His surprise at running a 2:50 marathon at the end of an Ironman Running 4:03 /Kms at Portugal Where his mind goes during the race His unconventional approach to nutrition last season His surprising fear of Open Water swimming Done with the chaos during a race dealing with Why Fraser carries out complex long division during a race Why long division was able to keep Fraser relaxed during the race The importance of presence during race Inc Hyrox 1:15:34 Social Media The Potential Impact Social Media has on performance Why Fraser doesn't like social media How social media can inspire beginners Why Fraser feels uncomfortable talking about his achievements Why he doesn't let people he doesn't know follow him on Strava Whether it's ok to post your coaches programming on your socials The reason I post my workouts to social media 01:27:52 Heart Rate Zones in Training & Competition Which heart rate zones you predominantly work in during an Ironman The advantages of a large aerobic swimming base 4x4 threshold sessions 01:40:30 Fraser’s Training What preseason training looks like Trail running importance Why Strava might be harming your pre/off-season 01:47:41 Being coached by Joel Jameson How he met Joel Jameson What Joel would say about Fraser if he wasn't in the room What makes a good coach 01:54:37 Nutrition & Carbohydrates Frasers carbs per hour 02:05:31 Audience questions How he found transitioning from swimming to tri Frasers biggest influences Barrows long list of athletes Kmc discount Motivation to train while working full time Go to prehab and mobility exercises The pinnacle for him in achievements Why? Why training? Why? Competing for enjoyment will likely make you perform better What a peak training week looks like What is a brick session and how Fraser trains them 02:27:36 Future plans, his wife & Fraser’s contact details 02:32:23 Fraser’s self reflection questions ***LINKS*** Get 10% Off At Kendal Mint Co: https://bit.ly/3OL6FwR Fraser’s Instagram: https://bit.ly/3D2esnx MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #ironmanchampion

If you're wondering how to identify your sexual needs, feel that you're stuck in an unfulfilling relationship or are simply curious about autism, neurodivergence or childhood trauma then today's episode might be a helpful resource. My guest today is Nadja Lasbeck, she's an intimacy coach, relationship therapist, lecturer & a mother. Today’s Time Stamped Chapter List In Full: 00:05:19 Nadja's experience with Joy 00:08:41 Nadja's hilarious Halloween story 00:11:11 Why we laugh in awkward social situations 00:16:03 Why Nadja finds it hard to experience joy 00:19:39 Why we look at the past through rose-tinted glasses 00:21:18 Why carry out addictive behaviours that make us feel bad 00:23:25 Why saunas are a great example of impermanence 00:25:37 Whether or not you are born with autism or if it can develop throughout childhood and adolescence 00:29:09 Why learning about neurodivergence and autism might make you appear more autistic 00:33:24 How it seems like more of us are neurodiverse than neurotypicals 00:33:59 Why Nadja believes her autism makes less people like her 00:40:04 Why my attraction to a resting bitch face might actually be attraction to neurodivergence 00:43:39 How to identify and communicate sexual needs 00:46:32 What Nadja's secret kink is 00:50:31 Examples of common kinks which you shouldn't be ashamed of 00:57:55 Whether buying sexy lingerie for your partner at Christmas is a selfish act 01:01:46 Differing perspectives on using mas******ion for self-soothing 01:07:14 The strange mental state that men enter after eja*****ion, also known as post-n*t clarity 01:19:12 What Nadja has changed their mind about recently 01:22:05 Varieties in a man's sperm type and how that affects survival strategy 01:25:13 The hardest thing Nadja has ever done in her life 01:29:02 Nadja's deepest fear 01:35:13 What Nadja would say to a younger self 01:36:16 Nadja's favourite sound 01:41:16 Why music is a bit like p**n but with more magic 01:42:29 If Nadja was on her deathbed, one lesson she would like to leave behind 01:43:21 My alternate perspective on the regrets of the dying 01:54:05 Being unable to draw boundaries in relationships 01:56:35 Why we stay in unfulfilling relationships 02:01:50 The question that Nadja is asking herself each day 02:03:50 Why we are making the ego great again 02:07:21 My recent life-altering ego death experience 02:10:33 Whether there really is a difference between imagination and reality 02:18:15 Figuring out who we are without our Trauma 02:22:57 Nadja's contact details Please check out the show notes for links to today’s guest and other resources. I hope you enjoy the episode. #intimacyadvice ***LINKS*** Nadja’s Website: https://bit.ly/46L7hLi Nadja’s Instagram: https://bit.ly/3M1vrHO MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj

If you’re looking to be a better leader within your organisation, are wondering if giving up alcohol is for you or are just curious about how high-performing CEOs think and operate, then today’s episode might be of interest. My guest today is James Fleming, he’s the CEO & Co-Founder of The Power Within Training, Author, Husband & Father. James and I discuss: His early years and progression in the oil and gas industry. The pivotal moment when he decided to build his own leadership company. How James coped with his 10-year-old daughter moving to a different country. How sobriety and exercise helped James view life more objectively. What makes a good leader. James's recommended time allocations for leaders and CEOs. How to craft a vision for your organisation. Understanding why your vision actually matters. The definition of Motivational Intelligence (MQ) How to ask better questions when interviewing and recruiting. The importance of matching personality types to hiring roles. What James's wife would say about him when he's not in the room. How he manages his relationship with his wife and daughter while running 100mph at work. The five-minute version of a course that is normally delivered over several weeks. His seven steps to success in leadership. Which sex faces the greater challenges in business AND The one question James would ask himself at the beginning of every day. I hope you enjoy the conversation. Chapters (manually crafted) 00:00:00 Intro 00:01:36 His early years and progression in the oil and gas industry 00:17:33 The pivotal moment when he decided to build his own leadership company. 00:25:02 How James coped with his 10-year-old daughter moving to a different country. 00:27:53 How sobriety and exercise helped James view life more objectively. 00:35:11 What makes a good leader. 00:40:34 James's recommended time allocations for leaders and CEOs. 00:43:44 How to craft a vision for your organisation. 00:48:32 Understanding why your vision actually matters. 00:39:39 The definition of Motivational Intelligence (MQ) 00:56:11 Leadership Motivational Intelligence (LMQ) 01:02:18 How to ask better questions when interviewing and recruiting. 01:07:04 The importance of matching personality types to hiring roles. 01:08:16 What James's wife would say about him when he's not in the room. 01:09:41 How he manages his relationship with his wife and daughter while running 100mph at work. 01:17:17 The five-minute version of a course that is normally delivered over several weeks. 01:18:16 His seven steps to success in leadership. 01:29:38 Which sex faces the greater challenges in business 01:36:31 The one question James would ask himself at the beginning of every day. ***LINKS*** Website: https://bit.ly/3V6zWWo James’ Book: https://bit.ly/3Zpl7Ru Instagram: https://bit.ly/3CHttuB MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #leadershipadvice

My guest today is Tripp Advice. He's a men’s dating coach, podcaster & an author. Tripp and I delve into a wide array of topics including: My somewhat embarrassing dating inbox fails Tripps background as a shy, unsuccessful dater If you should lie about your height How he learned to talk to girls His ‘rock bottom’ moment in dating The experience of approaching women while sober The most important metric to focus on for dating success Why you shouldn’t swipe right on as many women as possible The highest impact dating profile optimisations Whether or not you should be upfront about already having kids What effect the algorithm has on online dating Why you should always pay for the dating apps My thoughts on girls who only post close ups Why dating apps are fantastic for women If you should share your Instagram handle The biggest mistake guys make when asking for feedback on their profile (sorry girls) Whether or not you should post videos to your dating profile How to effectively split test Tripps top four openers for online and irl His advice to any women listening AND Which two questions you should be asking yourself before the start of each day Tripp is a huuuge name in the men’s dating sphere and we managed to unpack a hell of a lot in this conversation. Another one for the guys today ladies, but judging on the feedback from recent episodes it seems you quite like being a fly on the wall in these manly chats. I hope you enjoy the episode. Chapters 00:01:33 Tripps background as a shy, unsuccessful dater 00:07:12 How he learned to talk to girls 00:10:44 The first time he ever went out to approach women 00:10:44 His ‘rock bottom’ moment 00:13:35 The experience of approaching women while sober 00:14:59 The difference between night and day approaching 00:15:50 What methods he’s incorporated from pickup artistry and The Game 00:17:05 How you should be splitting your efforts to talk to girls online and real life 00:19:28 The most important metric to focus on for dating success 00:21:43 How to filter the right person to date 00:24:58 Why you shouldn’t swipe right on as many women as possible 00:26:08 What effect the algorithm has in online dating 00:26:55 Why you should always pay for the dating apps 00:30:59 If you should lie about your height 00:36:25 If you should be upfront about already having kids on your profile 00:38:17 My thoughts on girls who only post close ups 00:38:50 Why dating apps are fantastic for women 00:39:38 If you should share your Instagram handle 00:45:38 The highest impact dating profile optimisations 00:47:29 Whether or not you should post videos to your dating profile 00:48:36 How to effectively split test your profile “split testing” 00:52:18 The biggest (and somewhat controversial) mistake guys make when asking for feedback on their profile 00:55:09 My highly embarrassing dating inbox fails (for your pleasure) 01:02:41 Tripps top four openers for online and irl 01:05:36 His advice to any women listening 01:06:36 Future plans and projects 01:07:42 The two questions you should be asking yourself at the start of each day ***LINKS*** Website: https://bit.ly/3OclF6E Coaching: https://bit.ly/4fxwpIK Instagram: https://bit.ly/40UFabp Tripp’s Book: https://amzn.to/4fR7EXE MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #datingadviceformen

My guest today is professor Sarah Berry. She's a professor of nutritional sciences at King's college London and the chief scientist at Zoe. Sarah and I delve into a wide array of topics including: What ‘’precision nutrition’'' is How genetics affect metabolism The mechanistic processes that happen when we eat What exactly atherosclerosis is Arguments around the Carnivore diet, Apo B levels & LDL cholesterol If it's okay to have high LDL cholesterol if your Apo B levels are low Whether or not calories are the only important factor in weight loss Time restricted feeding If all calories are created equal The thermogenic effect of food Sarah's thoughts on pro protein culture Why there's much disagreement on protein recommendations and nutrition AND What Sarah would eat if she only had 10 foods to live off I feel very fortunate to have had the opportunity to interview professor Berry, as podcasters and content creators we love to hypothesise and speculate on things we haven't actually researched and Sarah clearly takes her work very seriously and sticks well within her lane of expertise. It's a little shorter than my usual episodes but I think there's a lot in here for us all to take away. I hope you enjoy my conversation with professor Sarah Berry. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:30 What's brought Sarah to what she does today 00:02:50 What is Zoe and it's mission 00:04:53 Zoe's biggest challenge 00:05:58 What is precision nutrition 00:08:08 How do genetics affect metabolism? 00:13:34 What happens when we eat 00:17:39 What is atherosclerosis? 00:20:01 The argument around the Carnivore diet, Apo B levels & LDL cholesterol 00:26:24 Is it okay to have high LDL cholesterol if your Apo B levels are low? 00:32:48 Are calories the only important factor in weight loss (cals in/out argument) 00:37:24 Time restricted feeding 00:38:55 Ways to lose weight that don't involve calorie restriction (are all calories created equal) 00:42:07 The thermogenic effect of food 00:43:17 Sarah's thoughts on pro protein culture 00:44:45 Why is there so much disagreement on protein and nutrition? 00:51:53 Making smart investments in your health 00:57:05 What Sarah would eat if she only had 10 foods to choose from 01:02:57 Future research at Zoe ***LINKS*** Zoe Website https://bit.ly/3YZi2Hy Zoe Podcast https://spoti.fi/3YBnpeu Sarah’s Instagram https://bit.ly/4fhXkbC MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #apob #professor #nutrition #podcast #awakenoutofcontext

My guest today is Christopher K Wallace, he's a men’s counsellor, author, father & husband. Chris and I dig into a vast array of topics including: Chris’ colourful background including dealing drugs, being shot in the chest with a crossbow & conceiving his son in prison The moral & scientific arguments around chatting up a woman after she’s had a drink How to tap into your inner essence & become aware of your value to the world Why drinking alcohol is in addiction to fear *How alcohol degrades your confidence & how to cultivate it intrinsically How and why you should trace emotional responses in the body back to childhood Chris’ rehab and ultimate journey to becoming an addiction therapist His mission of fighting societal male weakness What ‘Masculine Destiny’ means Why strengths can be perceived weaknesses The nervous system & the process of affect How to become aware of the predictive brain & override your autopilot How desire & fear interact and the riddle of addiction The Nature vs nurture argument as it relates to attachment Insights from Chris’ book, Sipping Fear Pissing Confidence Why addiction to a behaviour never leaves you How to replace Wanting with Winning The illusion of Free Will & solution of Free Won’t AND Chris’ message to the world's male population Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction to Christopher K Wallace 00:01:31 Chris’ early years of drug dealing, being shot in the chest with a crossbow & conceiving his son in prison 00:19:31 The Nature vs nurture argument as it relates to attachment 00:22:53 Chris’ rehab and ultimate journey to becoming an addiction therapist 00:29:13 Chris’ mission of fighting societal male weakness 00:30:13 What Chris’ term ‘Masculine Destiny’ means 00:46:07 How to tap into our inner essence 00:51:11 How to understand your value to the world 00:53:28 Why strengths can be perceived weaknesses 00:57:31 The nervous system & affect 00:59:53 How to become aware of the predictive brain 01:05:00 How to override your autopilot system 01:07:41 How and why you should trace emotional responses in the body back to childhood 01:18:13 How desire & fear interact and the riddle of addiction 01:20:11 Why drinking alcohol is an addiction to fear 01:32:45 How alcohol degrades your confidence & how to cultivate intrinsic confidence 01:36:18 Insights from Chris’ book, Sipping Fear Pissing Confidence 01:38:39 The moral & scientific arguments around chatting up a woman when she’s had a drink 01:44:52 Why addiction to a certain behaviour never leaves your nervous system 01:49:14 How to replace Wanting with Winning “how do we replace wanting with winning?” 01:51:13 The illusion of Free Will & solution of Free Won’t 01:56:44 Chris’ coaching programs & contact information 01:55:22 Chris’ text message to the world's male population ***LINKS*** Chris’ Website: https://bit.ly/4falWCO Listen to ‘Sipping Fear Pissing Confidence’ on Audible: https://adbl.co/3YpP2XS MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #masculinedestiny #maleweakness #addiction #podcast #awakenoutofcontext

My guest today is Paul Nadeau, he’s a former hostage negotiator, keynote & TEDx speaker, multi-author and script writer, actor & life coach. Paul and I delve into a wide array of topics including: How to know if we’re being lied to Paul’s acting and script writing career How to negotiate with a hostage How to Translate hostage negotiation skills into other domains of life How to Negotiate & become a more effective salesperson & communicator Paul’s time as a peacekeeper in the middle east and How his life was saved by a terrorist in Iraq AND How to ask for - and get - what you want Please enjoy my conversation with Paul Nadeau. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction to Paul Nadeau 00:01:23 Paul’s Story & Background 00:11:43 Hostage Negotiation 00:14:14 How To Negotiate With Someone Who Wants To Take Their Own Life 00:20:13 Is Hostage Negotiation An Act? 00:24:00 How to Negotiate & become a more effective salesperson & communicator 00:38:24 The S -A -L -E -S acronym 00:48:57 Paul’s Three Powerful Lessons 00:51:50 Paul’s time as a peacekeeper in the middle east and How his life was saved by a terrorist in Iraq 01:16:23 How do we know if someone's lying to us? 01:24:00 Paul’s Books & How To Ask For What You Want 01:39:38 Audience Questions 01:47:34 Future Plans ***LINKS*** Paul’s Website: https://bit.ly/3NDxwu9 Paul’s Instagram: https://bit.ly/4dVTseF MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #HostageNegotiation #Negotiation #SelfHelp #podcast #awakenoutofcontext

My guest today is Charlie Botterill, he's a Hyrox world record holder and ambassador, pure sport and My protein athlete and a budding entrepreneur (all at the age of 23). Charlie and I delve into a wide array of topics, including: Charlie's remarkable first full season and how he set the UK Hyrox world record. His Sports background Including Football and professional cycling. We discuss The influence of trauma on athletic performance. Charlie's role as a Hyrox Ambassador. If he would ever be tempted to take performance enhancing drugs. Charlie's past struggles with an eating disorder. His previously Untold Off-Season training secrets. The moral implications of performance enhancement. Charlie's thoughts on body image and the likeliness of PED’s in Hyrox. His unique approach to Self-Improvement. Charlie's list of 10 things he's going to do before 30. And The book that HE'S writing and A few of the useful tools and concepts from it Charlie is a fascinating individual, I thoroughly enjoyed our conversation and I am looking forward to seeing his progress over the next few years, I do think he's going to go very far. Please enjoy and be inspired by my conversation with Charlie Botterill. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:30 Charlie’s First Full Season In Hyrox 00:14:45 His Sports background 00:20:00 University Dissertation 00:23:50 Charlie's role as a Hyrox Ambassador 00:25:30 Past struggles with an eating disorder 00:34:00 Mental Health 00:38:20 Eating Disorder, Anorexia & Pro Cycling 00:44:00 Motivation, Mindset & The influence of trauma on athletic performance 00:50:00 Body image in and the likeliness of PED’s in Hyrox 00:58:50 If he would ever be tempted to take performance enhancing drugs 01:01:00 The moral implications of performance enhancement 01:03:00 His previously Untold Off-Season training secrets 01:13:00 The book that HE'S writing and A few of the useful tools and concepts from it 01:21:00 Charlie's list of 10 things he's going to do before 30 #hyroxtraining #charliebotterill #highperformers #podcast #awakenoutofcontext ***LINKS*** Charlie’s Instagram: https://bit.ly/48b8ZGl Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links):https://bit.ly/3tk8FVvFollow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason):https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj

My guest today is Christopher Hurst, he's an artist and tattooist. A British bipolar ex soldier now exploring polyamory, masculinity and mental health. Chris and I chat about a wide range of topics from our life's experiences including: The continuous battle of remember to have fun in life Our differing opinions on Winston Churchill Why dance is an important part in finding joy Our past experiences with binge drinking The education system and its impact on identity Why I believe I’m an introvert The prevalence of social masks & constructed identities Chris’ time in the British Army The effect of being in the military on your social status What Polyamory is AND Why a polyamorous relationship might be right for you During this conversation you may hear a reference to ‘Nadja’, this is friend of the show Nadja Lasbeck who we are mutually acquainted with. If you haven't listened to that episode yet, you should do so after this one. I hope you enjoy my conversation with Christopher Hurst. ***LINKS*** Chris’ Instagram https://bit.ly/487E39T MY STUFF: Awaken Out Of Context Podcast (YouTube & Podcast Links): https://bit.ly/3tk8FVv Follow Me On Instagram (@awakenoutofjason): https://bit.ly/3RAkKQj #polyamory #masking #alcohol #podcast #awakenoutofcontext