Predictability vs. Control

Something *super* simple (but of course these things are never all that easy) for you this week on ​The Transforming Anxiety Podcast​...3 little words that can change relationships AND anxiety. In a good way. I. Believe. You. When we are willing to say this, I believe you, it creates space for understanding and compassion. When we offer this, I believe you, it has the potential to connect, instead of separating us from the people in our lives. When we can pause and get out of the way, I believe you, it allows us to really hear what's happening...not through our own lens, but through someone else's. This brings people closer together. This regulates our nervous system. This is love. Join me for this week's episode and let's talk about it. ​I believe you​... Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/260  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. You can write me a message OR you can leave me a voicemail. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Happy Wednesday. 😊 I had this interesting epiphany a few weeks ago in a conversation with a friend of mine and thought, yup, we need to talk about that on ​The Transforming Anxiety Podcast​. I think most of us can find ourselves somewhere on the spectrum of *people pleasers*. It's pretty ingrained in us from a young age that making the people around us happy means: we get attention, we get approval, we get love. And through a variety of reasons, we make this mean different things: If I live my life in ways people want and expect, they will like me If I do what I'm supposed to do, they will like me If I always say "yes," they will like me If I am selfless and available, they will like me If I prioritize their wants / needs, they will like me We all run theme and variations of this stuff in our minds. It's like the calculus of belonging... ​I want to look at a really specific aspect of people pleasing today and that is: how it shows up on a macro level and how that differs from micro-level people pleasing​. Same thing, but different lenses. And when we see BOTH, we can recognize this behavior for what it is... Join me for this episode the podcast and let's talk about it... Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/259  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. You can write me a message OR you can leave me a voicemail. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Let's be honest with each other first thing today: we like to be in control. We like to have control. We like to have things under control. We are kinda control freaks. ​I want to talk about something *really* subtle re: control today​ so that we don't wind up thinking we have control where we do NOT have control and then find ourselves in a trap of trying to exert control over the outside world thinking, "wait, I've done this before and it worked" when it most decidedly did NOT and does NOT work. When things go according to plan, it doesn't have that much to do with us. When things fall apart, it doesn't have that much to do with us. Control is an inside job...the things we have the MOST control over are our thoughts, our feelings, and our words + actions. It sometimes LOOKS like we have control where we don't. And if we fall for that little trick, we wind up spinning our wheels in an effort to stay in control...when we our just pouring our energy into the wrong spot. Let's talk about it. ​Today on The Transforming Anxiety it's episode #258, Predictability vs. Control​. Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/258  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. You can write me a message OR you can leave me a voicemail. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

So this week we are talking about ​birthdays​ on ​The Transforming Anxiety Podcast​...mainly, honestly, because my birthday was Monday the 22nd and because every year, I get all in a tizzy about it... ...and I've found I'm not alone with this. For *years* I've wanted to create something to support us around birthdays so that we can enjoy them. Which is why I want to hear from YOU. In fact, ​I made a Google form​ so that you can tell me all the things re: birthdays and you. I know this can be a really sensitive issue. Between the nostalgic/homesick/sentimental emotions that we experience on our birthdays to the reality of aging to feeling overlooked, forgotten, or downright ignored...all the way to absolutely loving this thing that is your very own personal holiday, I want to hear all about it. The good, the challenging, and everything else. If you trust me enough to share, I'm here to listen. Consider it a birthday gift from you to me. 🥳 ​CLICK HERE if you want to give me your experiences, thoughts, and birthday wishes​. Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/257  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. You can write me a message OR you can leave me a voicemail. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Over and over again, I talk with students who describe feeling as if they can't turn the volume down on the thoughts in their minds. That incessant chatter gets relentless. The stories and ideas just swirl around until it all becomes a tornado. *exhausting* Today on ​The Transforming Anxiety Podcast​ I want to talk about ​how to get out of your head​ so that you can find some breathing room up there in your mind. You don't have to get lost in the cavern of your mind, going down rabbit hole after rabbit hole, hoping for an easy place to get some peace to show up. You can help yourself get OUT of your head, so that you can tune in to your life, your experience, your being. You are so much more than the thoughts you think. Let's talk about it together... Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/256  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. You can write me a message OR you can leave me a voicemail. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Good morning, happy Wednesday! This week's episode of The Transforming Anxiety Podcast is a discussion about something pretty simple, but a powerful addition to the toolbox that we're all using to take care of ourselves around anxiety. And that is: the inevitable ​lapses in logic​ that occur in our minds. Our brains are shameless; they'll think absolutely *anything*. But this concept gives us a solid reminder that just because we think it, doesn't mean it's true. It's like there's a glitch in the matrix... Sometimes we can approach a challenge (work presentation!) or something icky (a snake!) or something scary (teens driving!) with clarity and rationale. Aaaaaand sometimes, we just totally lose the plot. What's the difference? Whether we can, or cannot, tell the whole story, all the way through, using reason and logic. Does our primal brain get in the way and perceive the situation as a threat? Or are we able to slow things down and calmly walk through the potential outcomes, seeing ALL possibilities as opposed to the one or two that point straight to the worst-case scenario? Let's talk about it. ​A lapse in logic​. This is something we ALL do. Fun! Join me and we'll sort it out together... Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/255  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. You can write me a message OR you can leave me a voicemail. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Well, this may be (as close as we're gonna get to) the piece de resistance of the podcast: today, we're talking about ​living well​. Pretty much everything we do around here points to this: how can you feel okay in your skin? How can you move around the world being alright with who you are? ​How can you live well?​ We got pretty caught up in the daily stuff and I think we lose sight of what's most vital. I know I have. And this is something I'm staying really close to right now: living well. Taking care of myself by focusing pretty much *exclusively* on: mind, body, and heart. I also am asking simple, but powerful, questions like: What do I need right now? What do I want? How could I get a little more comfortable? Is there I'm thinking, feeling, or doing that seems icky? What am I feeling pulled towards? How can I be a little kinder with myself? Nothing time-consuming, nothing ground-breaking. But it is helping me to get really honest and clear about what I truly want and need in my life. Join me. Let's talk about it. Probably the first of many, but I'm looking forward to this conversation with you... Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/254  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Ok, *today* we are going to focus on something that I know brings a lot of confusion, guilt, and pressure (aka anxiety) into our lives...and that is: ​what community looks like​. I have experienced this myself and I talk to students every week about it. The people in our lives. Get-togethers and social gatherings. Family and holidays and vacations. Friend groups, acquaintances, colleagues. How are we supposed to interact with all of these people? How many people should we have in our lives? ​What does community look like​? If you feel like you're constantly cycling through obligations, expectations, and trying to live up to some social-media-inspired lifestyle, full of people, this one is for you. Let's talk about community and take some time to define this for ourselves together today. Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/253  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Good morning. ☀️ I hope this finds you well. That you're doing ok so far this week. That you're hanging in, finding some flow, letting yourself breathe, and being kind with yourself. On this week's episode of ​The Transforming Anxiety Podcast​ I wanted to explore how we can move through *all the things* without having quite such a death grip on life. Because, I mean, I think we DO. I've noticed we're holding on to it all pretty tightly...hoping that we can make it, that we can push through, that we can force it all to work and get all the people to cooperate and generally get things together. But I wonder: what if we loosened our grip? What if we relaxed our jaws, shook off some tension, and let go just a little bit? What if we ​hold it lightly​? We don't have to swing all the way into "screw it, nevermind, I give up" mode. We could just...chill. You've heard of this, yeah? The concept of chilling out. 🙃 Me too. Let's give it a go together. Join me for this week's conversation and let's take a look at where we're hanging on for dear life...and see if we could ​hold it lightly​ instead. I'll see you there. Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/252  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...

Ahhhhh, it's good to be back...back to transforming anxiety. I missed you. In this week's episode of The Transforming Anxiety Podcast I'm sharing a bit with you about why I took a(n unplanned) break, how I personally struggle a bit, and what we have to look forward to together: work that I want to do, practices I want to steep myself in, teachings I want to stay close to. With you... I want you to know that I don’t take the fact that you're here lightly. I don’t for a second take it for granted that you’re here with me. That you listen in. That you share your inbox with me. That this work means something to you. It means the world to me, too. And that’s why I do it. That’s why I show up. That’s why I love on you and bring you these conversations, from my heart and my research and my curiosity and a deep love for all of us who feel and struggle and work with and around and inside of anxiety. I get it. I walk this path right alongside you. I'm so glad to be back. I've been thinking about you. And working hard. And also had to just take a moment to breathe and sit in the dark. But I missed you. Let's get back to transforming anxiety... Full show notes are located at: www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com/podcast/251  Be sure to join my email list so you don't miss announcements, new classes, and podcast updates by visiting www.kellyhanlinmccormick.com  Submit your questions to me by CLICKING THIS LINK. I can reply directly to you and may use your question or comment on a future episode of the show! Also: I just love hearing from you. Let’s be in touch. 😊 Text PODCAST to +1 (816)354-1279 and I'll send mindfulness reminders, anxiety hacks, and little love notes your way from time to time...