Queerly Yours

For a lighter episode interlude, Angela and Moss play a bachelorette party/group date game using a number of "newlywed game" prompt lists from wedding websites. Some of them are silly, some of them are surprisingly sweet, and some seem specifically designed to help people steal the answers to your common password security questions. You can look at a couple of the prompt lists here and here. (There are a few subtle audio oddities in this episode - Moss managed to mess up their own audio track with overzealous auto-removal of pauses, and had to re-record short sections where the track sounded choppy.) Moss also recently guested on another podcast, Guess What You're Gonna Hate, where they talked with Janine Winfree about some of the LGBTQ+ webcomics that shaped both their teen years! You can listen at Episode 111: Wild West of Webcomics. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Moss writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon, jokes about gender norms on TikTok, and talks about game design on twitter

Moss and Angela talk about how their experiences of queerness, transness, and neurodivergence intertwine to inform how they see themselves and shape what they want and need in relationships. It's not always an easy experience, but it's valuable, and has lead them towards some forms of care and affection that they wouldn't have developed otherwise. Content warning: This episode contains lengthy discussions of ableism and brief mentions of racism, relationship abuse, and the unsettling commonness of active shooters in the United States. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Moss writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon, jokes about gender norms on TikTok, and talks about game design on twitter

Angela and Moss talk about gender norms! They're in media, they're embedded in cultural structures and histories, and they're definitely in our relationships. They've especially been on Moss' mind ever since they started talking about "cis core" home goods and fashion online and got flooded with responses about people's varied experiences of gender and consumerism. What does it feel like to try and notice, acknowledge, and untangle gender norms as a trans person? It's a topic that's definitely bigger than one episode can cover, but the hosts give it a try! Content warning: this episode includes some references to/discussions of institutional racism, intimate partner violence, gender dysphoria, and suicidal ideation. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Moss writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon, jokes about gender norms on TikTok, and talks about game design on twitter

Moss and Angela are back from hiatus, and a lot has changed! Your hosts are the same, but Moss has a new name and is currently recovering from top surgery. The pair dive back into podcasting with reflections on that surgical care and recovery process, and what it has revealed and affirmed about their relationship. (This episode was recorded in mid-January 2021 but is being released mid-February because getting out of hiatus is hard). Content warning: this episode discusses physical and emotional elements of undergoing, recovering from, and caring for someone recovering from, surgery. The physical descriptions are not gory or detailed, but Moss does touch on topics like nipple grafts, surgical drains, anesthesia, and post-surgery constipation risks. Moss also mentions the existence of web resources that can be used to coordinate meals and/or communicate healing processes and care needs to friends and family. Two strong examples are Meal Train (focused on food coordination) and CaringBridge (a shareable online health journal). ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Moss writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon, jokes about gender norms on TikTok, and talks about game design on twitter 

Angela and Naomi give their relationship a health checkup, using this quiz from Love Is Respect dot org. 2020 has been a hell of a year so far! Join the hosts as they do their best to ease gently and thoughtfully back into podcasting in a strange time by reflecting on how they connect with and care for each other. Content warning: the intro to this episode contains brief mentions of family death and grief, and the main episode contains non-specific mentions of transphobia from family members, references to dissociation and suicidal ideation, and descriptions of possible warning signs of assault/abuse. The hosts provide a heads up before reading the most descriptive of the quiz questions about abuse. The essay format relationship health article that Naomi mentions can be found at Scarleteen here. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Naomi writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon and talks about game design on twitter 

Naomi and Angela are back from hiatus, and they're ready to dig into a fairly meta topic - the pros and pitfalls that can arise when you're working on a shared creative project with one or more close partners. They reflect on the ways that they have experienced both successes and stresses in artistic collaborations, and offer thoughts on how to check in about projects that need to be reshaped, adjusted, or scrapped to better support the actual needs and desires of the collaborators. This episode was recorded in November 2019 and edited in February 2020, because sometimes creative work has to land on the back burner due to life, but the hosts are glad to be bringing Queerly Yours back to you and your earbuds! If you'd like to check out articles and projects mentioned in this episode, links are below. Captain Awkward's advice on how to deal with commitment/focus mismatches with a creative project partner is here. The Business Card Jam, which was still running when this episode was recorded, ended up having over 80 entries, which you can explore here! The Welcome to the Party Discord server community has been a wonderful source of episode topic inspiration, and you can learn about the many excellent RPG streams run by WTTP here. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Naomi writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon and talks about game design on twitter

Angela and Naomi talk with Elizabeth Nordenholt, co-host of the podcasts Your Fave is Problematic and FMK All Day, about her personal journey around queerness and polyamory. The three dig into topics like purity culture, helpful books on polyamory, friend and family responses to non-normative relationships, and assumptions about dating and romance you might not realize you have until you try to change the format of a partnership. We talk about a number of books in this episode! If you'd like to check them out, links are below. The All-Or-Nothing Marriage: find the book here, or an interview with the author on the Hidden Brain podcast here. Love’s Not Colorblind: find the book here, or an interview with the author on the Multiamory podcast here. Many Love memoir: find the book here. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Naomi writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon and talks about game design on twitter

Naomi and Angela answer a listener question about how to balance dating with other major life commitments like work and school. What do you do when you want to make new connections with people but the process feels time consuming or overwhelming? The hosts discuss multi-purpose ways to socialize, the general exhaustion of life under capitalism, and why folks who worry about their dating inexperience might already have more relevant social skills than they realize. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Naomi writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon and talks about game design on twitter 

Angela and Naomi discuss what bisexuality means to them personally as well as the ways that the term operates socially and culturally in their broader communities. They dig into bisexual stereotypes, terminology overlap, and how there’s no required timeline for developing an understanding of your sexuality or gender because compulsory heterosexuality is a huge mess for all of us. For a nice overview of some bisexual activist history in the U.S. along with links to other resources, check out this article on Autostraddle. For an analysis of the dangers that come with assuming that gender or sexuality are strictly categorizable and clearly identifiable concepts, read Os Keyes’ essay on data violence, Counting the Countless. The RPG about romancing cryptids that Naomi mentions is called i kissed mothman behind the arby’s. ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Naomi writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon and talks about game design on twitter 

Naomi and Angela talk about Pride, exploring what it means to them and how it culturally operates as a protest, a parade, a philosophy, and more. Angela talks about how race and disability can affect experiences of and connections to Pride events. Naomi shares what they make sure to carry when attending big outdoor festivals, and suggests ways for allies/accomplices to show up for LGBTQ+ folks this month and every month. (Two things the hosts definitely agree on are that cops shouldn't be at Pride, and that you should buy a trans person a pizza.) ___ Want to follow the hosts elsewhere on the Internet?
 Angela shares her poetry and other creative projects on her Patreon and twitter Naomi writes RPGs, makes zines, and shares podcast bonuses on their Patreon and talks about game design on twitter