Interview with Devorah Heitner - Nir And Far

“There are a whole lot of ways to be perfect, and not one of them is attained through punishment.” —science fiction author Ursula K. Le Guin Pushing ourselves and holding ourselves accountable are how we achieve success. Unfortunately, many of us mistake harsh self-criticism and self-castigation for “pushing ourselves.” And that has the opposite of the desired effect. You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: Studies Show Self-Compassion is the Motivator You’re Missing https://www.nirandfar.com/self-compassion-to-succeed/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

Nir’s Note: This article is a collaboration between Jonathan Haidt, a social psychologist at New York University’s Stern School of Business, and me. He researches moral and political psychology and business ethics. He has delivered four TED Talks and written two best-selling books. We’ve been friends for years, and our daughters often played together when I lived in New York City. You can read the NirAndFar blog post on: Children and Technology: 3 Things Parents Need To Know https://www.nirandfar.com/children-and-technology/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

Can virtual meetings be as effective as in-person ones? It’s one thing to eliminate distractions in meetings. It’s another to do the same in virtual meetings. Now that virtual teams are becoming a norm, many coworkers have never met each other in person. Yet, they’re expected to work every day toward a shared goal. Rapport and trust become even more crucial in virtual workplaces but also may be trickier to establish. You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: How to Banish Virtual Meeting Boredom https://www.nirandfar.com/virtual-meeting-boredom/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

You’re probably not going to fulfill all your goals this year. And if you don’t, it likely won’t be because you’re incapable; it will be because you got in your own way. A slew of limiting beliefs will distract you from your goals and New Year’s resolutions. Below are four ways you’re likely to shoot yourself in the foot with self-limiting beliefs, plus how to get rid of them. You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: Limiting Beliefs: Ditch the 4 Dream Killers Holding You Back https://www.nirandfar.com/limiting-beliefs/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

Nir’s Note: Noah Kagan is the Chief Sumo at AppSumo and runs a YouTube Channel with over 1 million subscribers. His new book, Million Dollar Weekend, is out now. Airbnb began as a weekend project when the founders sent an email offering their living-room air mattress to hotelless attendees of a major design conference. Facebook started when Mark Zuckerberg built a clone of ConnectU over the weekend and told everyone in his dorm about it. Even Microsoft began with Bill Gates making software quickly for a company in Albuquerque, New Mexico. You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: The Magic of Now, Not How Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

How can we become more discerning buyers in a world that encourages us to spend? We have to stop falling for subtle sales psychology tactics. You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: Sales Psychology: Why You Make Terrible Buying Choices https://www.nirandfar.com/sales-psychology/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

Hindsight bias occurs when people feel that they “knew it all along” – when they believe that an event is more predictable after it becomes known than it was before it became known2 . In other words, when we’re looking back at an event after it already happened, knowing that outcome influences our perception of the events leading up to it. Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

You could feel the excitement buzzing through the WhatsApp channel. An A-list fitness guru reportedly spending millions of dollars yearly to reverse aging was in town to hold an in-person workout. Without hesitating, I signed up. I was interested in seeing Mr. Guru in action and eager to be inspired by his approach. You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: Listening to Fitness Gurus is Making You Fat https://www.nirandfar.com/fitness-guru-myth/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

Whenever you have a disagreement with someone you care about and who cares about you, pose this straightforward question: “How important is this to you on a scale of 1 to 10?” The size of the disagreement doesn’t matter. Whether it’s about dinner choices or naming your first-born child, this method helps avoid unnecessary disagreements and keeps relationships strong (most of the time, see exceptions below). You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: Score Your Spats: How to Stop Arguing and Enhance Your Relationships https://www.nirandfar.com/how-to-stop-arguing/ Nir And Far, a podcast about business, behaviour and the brain by Nir Eyal. If you enjoy this podcast, please subscribe on iTunes and leave an iTunes review. It will greatly help new listeners discover the show. Please visit my website Nir and Far for other info about my writing, books and teaching: http://www.nirandfar.com/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support

Understanding the distinction is the first step to managing your time Because I write about distraction and how to avoid it, I often get asked the question “Aren’t distractions sometimes a good thing? Don’t we all need some distraction in our lives?” Nope! You can read the Nir And Far blog post on: The Crucial Difference Between Distraction and Diversion https://www.nirandfar.com/distraction-vs-diversion/ --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/nirandfar/support