Experts On: The Power Of Connection To Others—And Yourself

Talking points: culture This one will rattle some people, but it needs saying. Let’s just leave it at that. (00:00:00) - Intro, and why shaming men is a bad approach to better behavior (00:05:27) - The patriarchy virus (00:11:06) - Yes, this has a lot of a complexity, but dehumanizing men who aren’t in power isn’t helping anyone (00:14:19) - The practical consequences and how we need to take a step back *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: isolation, culture, relationships, friendship, anger, connection Every now and I then, my team and I like to compile some of the greatest insights from our guests and center them around a theme. This week, we’re going hard on connection. The importance and nuance of it, the consequences of being without it, and the ways connection manifests. These days, connection isn't easy, but it's more important than ever. Listen in some highly distilled wisdom. (00:00:00) - Doug McKinley on isolation, passing down wisdom, self-leadership, working weaknesses, and adding value to you and your world (00:21:51) - Nedra Tawwab on developing satisfying friendships and how to navigate tough conversations  (00:35:26) - Marisa Franco on how men and women build friendship differently, “friendship minus mission”, how camaraderie has changed over the years, and the impacts of NOT having friends (00:50:56) - Angus Fletcher on changing your internal story and your relationship to yourself, cultivating inner antifragility, and relating differently to your own anger *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: fatherhood, parenting, mindset, culture Taking time off as a man seems perfectly normal—until it’s done for a newborn. While I don’t disagree that a father can (and should) work to provide for his family, I also think that your presence is a deeply important factor in your kid’s development. Here’s my rationale. (00:00:00) - What inspired this episode (00:03:10) - The real reasons I took time off  (00:07:56) - How I’ve learned to define success (00:11:52) - I challenge men to think differently about things when their children are born *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: relationships, testosterone, estrogen, stress I had John on the show years ago, and it seemed like the right time to ask: has anything changed since publishing his seminal book? Turns out the answer is yes—and no. Dig in with us as we cover John’s take on conflict, mindset, confidence, emotions, hormones, and a lot more! (00:00:00) - How have things changed since you wrote your book, and do men and women deal with stress differently? (00:16:40) - John’s take on why testosterone has become somewhat demonized, and the limits of talking about your feelings in a relationship (00:36:32) - John on truth, and the meeting place of mindset and reality (00:44:41) - The paradox of confidence and the comfort zone, and the basics of emotional processing (00:56:25) - The balancing act that is testosterone and estrogen, and its effects on aggression and self-esteem John Gray is the author of the most well-known and trusted relationship book of all time, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. USA Today listed his book as one of the top 10 most influential books of the last quarter-century. In hardcover, it was the #1 best-selling book of the 1990s. Dr. Gray’s books are translated into approximately 45 languages in more than 100 countries and continues to be a bestseller. Dr. Gray has written over 20 books. His most recent book is Beyond Mars and Venus: Relationship Skills for Our Complex Modern World. His Mars/Venus book series has forever changed the way men and women view their relationships. John helps men and women better understand and respect their differences in both personal and professional relationships. His approach combines specific communication techniques with healthy, nutritional choices that create the brain and body chemistry for lasting health, happiness, and romance. Connect with John -Website: https://www.marsvenus.com/ -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/johngraymarsvenus_official/ -Books: https://www.marsvenus.com/books *** This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Easily match with a therapist who can help you through the tough times and empower your best self. Visit BetterHelp.com/mantalks today to get 10% off your first month. Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: attachment, avoidance, relationships This is thicker one, my friends. I’ve been asked by a lot of you to cover this, and here goes. There’s straightforward tactics in here for both men and women that will help you move more easily into deeper and longer lasting connection. Listen in. (00:00:00) - Intro, some of the internal beliefs an avoidant woman has learned, and what caused them (00:06:08) - Avoidant women tend to attract savior-oriented men. Here’s why (00:09:26) - What to do as a couple, and tactic #1 for women: communicate your needs, but start smaller  (00:13:42) - #2: shifting from self-protection to relational connection (00:16:33) - #3: lean into conflict, not away, plus a couple things that will help you with this (00:19:58) - Guys, your turn. #1: move from questions to statements (00:23:20) - #2: give thanks instead of criticism (00:25:18) - #3: be clear about expectations  *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: music, artistry, creativity, AI, culture, spirituality, psychedelics Music has been around for thousands and thousands of years. There’s a reason for that: it’s a powerful, synchronizing force between peoples, places hearts, and minds. And when you add psychedelics, well, that’s a recipe for incredible journeys. I’m honored to have had this convo with one of my favorite artists, and we dig into just how important music is not just for enjoyment but as a guide, mentor, and facilitator. We also cover his upcoming doc, Music For Mushrooms. Listen in, team. (00:00:00) - What role does music play in our lives that we often overlook, and how East’s relationship to music has changed over the years (00:08:25) - What’s worrisome about AI and music? (00:16:47) - How artists can weather the storm (00:23:05) - On initiation, and the threshold we’re crossing into a vast, uncharted era (00:26:00 ) - What was it like making music with Ram Dass? (00:32:49) - How do you make music for a psychedelic journey, and how the union of music and psychedelics leads to something more (00:43:15) - How do you describe psychedelics to someone who’s never done them? (00:48:21) - How music can be a mentor and a guide to turn to (00:51:55) - What sparked East’s Music For Mushrooms documentary Since 2008, East Forest has used music to guide listeners through modern journeys of deep introspection. The electro-acoustic project has remained primarily a solo effort (of Krishna-Trevor Oswalt), straddling the worlds of ambient, neoclassical, electronic and indie-pop. Whether via his Music For Mushrooms: A Soundtrack For The Psychedelic Practitioner album series, his collaborative spoken word album with Ram Dass, or one of his communal “Ceremony Concerts,” East Forest’s goal has always been “building bridges and creating an approach that’s grounded, embodied, and unarguable.” Connect with East -Website: https://eastforest.org/ -Documentary, Music For Mushrooms: https://eastforest.org/music-for-mushrooms -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/eastforest/ -Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/east-forest/304982626 -Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3AWGOhO *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: relationships, mindset, victimhood, entitlement This is going to…bother some of you, but it needs to be said. Straight out the gates, this isn’t an every single man or every single woman issue, but these are what’s contributing to the insanity that is modern dating. Hear me out. (00:00:00) - Intro and how this is gonna upset some people (00:02:21) - The man that some women expect to date doesn’t exist, why that’s a thing, (00:07:55) - The idea that what women bring to a relationship is automatically more valuable isn’t always true (00:10:11) - On entitlement and how both sides are contributing (00:13:11 ) - Men, you’ve bought into the BS notion that something is automatically wrong with women  (00:15:40) - Many men are fundamentally afraid of women and don’t want to admit it (00:18:34) - Many men have become fragile (00:21:05) - No more victim puking and women blaming *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: parenting, attachment, mindset, psychology, neurology The internet behaved badly in this episode, but Eli is so knowledgeable and thorough I had to put this up! The Attachment Nerd herself brought a TON of info and practical tips for parents this week. Strongly encourage you to listen to this with other parents. I certainly learned a lot. Her new book comes out Sept. 3rd; go pick it up! (00:00:00) - What is reflective functioning, and when does that start developing? (00:06:58) - How does a parent support a child who’s still developing that reflective functioning? (00:12:58) - The problem with treating kids as little adults, and why we do it (00:20:44) - How to tell if you’re raising a securely attached kid; 4 simple tips (00:32:05) - The importance of presence and support over adult logic, and on staying grounded (00:40:18) - How to foster discipline AND self-esteem in your kids Eli Harood, known as Attachment Nerd on social media, is a licensed therapist, bestselling author, and highly sought-after educator who has more than 17 years of experience helping people process relational traumas and develop secure connections with their children. Her life’s mission is to help make the world a better place one relationship at a time. In addition to her clinical work, Harwood also offers online courses and in-person retreats to help individuals better understand their attachment styles and build stronger bonds. She has also served as a faculty member at The Denver Family Institute and is the author of “Securely Attached.” Eli has three children, one husband, two cats, and an extraordinary number of plants.  Connect with Eli -Website: https://attachmentnerd.com -Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/ -Book: Raising Securely Attached Kids: https://attachmentnerd.com/books/raising-securely-attached-kids -TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd *** This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Find a therapist who can help empower you through the tough times and cultivate your best self. Visit BetterHelp.com/mantalks today to get 10% off your first month. Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: suicide, culture, masculinity This isn’t an easy episode, but it’s important. If you’re someone who works with men, whatever kind of work that is, please share. (00:00:00) - A part of my story I rarely share (00:04:30) - What I’ve learned (00:07:35) - What’s contributing to this? (00:10:36) - If you’re somehow involved with men, here’s what to do. If you’re in this situation, here’s what I’ll tell you *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: attachment, avoidance, divorce My anonymous guest this week has been solving the puzzle of his anxious attachment style for a while now. He’s made great progress, but there’s more to be done. On top of this, while it’s impacted all of his romantic relationships with intense conflict, distance, and damage, his wife is an avoidant. It’s a complicated situation, but there IS a way forward. (00:00:00) - What brought our guest in today (00:05:58) - Why my guest is holding onto something they’ve identified as unhealthy (00:12:11) - What my guest is hoping to get out of the session, and a hard truth (00:16:53) - Taking on responsibility and shame when things aren’t working in the world (00:21:37) - When a young child can’t get the attention it needs, it’ll be encoded as panic to the child (00:31:33) - The declaration  *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance.  Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices