Healing Sexual Trauma in Men - with Therapist Papillon DeBoer

How much are your hormones being affected by your relationship problems? How many hormonal imbalances are just stress from struggles in partnership? Today, Dr. Ricky Arenson and I explore the intricate dance between relationships and happiness, particularly within the realm of sexual intimacy. We delve into the importance of meaningful connections for long-term fulfillment, discuss the affect of social media on our happiness, comfort, and keys to sustained happiness. We talk about Dr. Arenson's book "Women are Superior to Men," shedding light on physiological distinctions and their nuanced implications in relationships. Ultimately, we unravel the profound truth that the essence of sex transcends mere physicality, shaping desires within relationships or solitude, as we celebrate the profound magic embedded in human connections.TIMESTAMPS:00:00 - Intro01:29 - Opening02:08 - Ricky’s Story02:29 - Is it hormonal issues, or relationship issues?05:10 - Long-term healthy relationships are key to happiness09:58 - How to Prioritize Sex & Intimacy As A Parent17:10 - Our generation's struggles in health & relationships27:00 - Social Media's affect on relationships & people35:45 - Resolving Relationship Issues as a Team38:08 - Shifting The Focus From The Individual to The Partnership’s Needs 41:44 - Should You Stay in A Relationship?48:10 - How to be happier54:58 - Consequences of Being Too Comfortable57:59 - Final Words01:00:34 - How to Find and Connect With Dr Ricky Arenson---------------------🔱  CONNECT WITH DR. ARENSON🔸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rickyarenson_/🔸 Website: https://drrickyarenson.com/ 🔸Book: https://www.amazon.com/Women-Are-Superior-Men-Fantastic/dp/B0B6XVBPYY---------------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/orgasmic-mastery-course/ 🔸 Semen Retention Mastery: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/semen-retention-mastery/ 🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge: https://learn.taylorjohnson.life/free-7-day-semen-retention-challenge 🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide: https://learn.taylorjohnson.life/Free-Ejaculation-Control-Training 🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:🔸 Sex Upgraded Podcast: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/podcast 🔸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taylorclarkjohnson 🔸 Website: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/ ---------------------#hormones #relationship #sexSupport the show

My partner Naema and I recorded this episode to teach you how to SKILLFULLY penetrate a woman in a truly pleasure-filled & connective way - informed by Naema's profession as a pelvic bodyworker & sex coach for Women, and from our own personal sexual practices too.In this episode you'll learn juicy & HIGHLY pleasurable sexual penetration techniques, you'll learn important female sexual anatomy (with visual diagrams in the video episode on Youtube), AND you'll learn how to avoid common penetration mistakes men make that can ruin sex for everyone involved.*NOTE: I've made these sex mistakes too. Please remember that I'm human just like you, and I've come a loooong way on my journey to get to where I am now. Ideally you can learn from my mistakes so you can have better sex today - without having to stumble as much as I did when I was younger.ABOUT NAEMANaema is a pelvic specialist for women, who combines powerful hands-on work with transformational ritual & coaching experiences too - proving a truly full-body, mind & spirit approach to healing sexual blocks and unlocking orgasmic, pain-free & fully confident sexual aliveness in the women she works with.EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:00:00 - Intro01:45 - Opening06:15 - Theme’s Naema has learned about penetration working with women08:15 - How rushing sex hurts women (and you too)15:45 - What makes a bad penetrative sex experience19:20 - What to do before sex23:15 - Technique to help her open24:30 - At what point should her pussy be touched?26:25 - How to warm up a vulva/should you touch her clit?32:05 - Diagram of Clitoris34:00 - Waiting for the ask36:40 - How to help your partner not feel rushed in penetration40:20 - *IMPORTANT* Technique for helping women to move through pain45:00 - How to help your woman heal her sexual trauma47:00 - 2 things that guys should do differently during sex50:00 - Playing with different types of pleasure with your partner54:35 - Cervical orgasms and what the cervix likes56:30 - How to stop penetration in a good way1:01:30 - Outro---------------------🔱  CONNECT WITH NAEMA🔸 Instagram🔸 Naema’s YouTube🔸Naema’s Links & Pussy Workshop ---------------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/orgasmic-mastery-course/ 🔸 Semen Retention Mastery: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/semen-retention-mastery/ 🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge: https://learn.taylorjohnson.life/free-7-day-semen-retention-challenge 🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide: https://learn.taylorjohnson.life/Free-Ejaculation-Control-Training 🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:🔸 Sex Upgraded Podcast: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/podcast 🔸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taylorclarkjohnson 🔸 Website: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/ ---------------------#Support the show

Discover the unexpected ways pleasure and kink intertwine with human psychology as we navigate the often-misunderstood waters of BDSM, consent, and sexual liberation. Joined by the insightful Ashley and the experienced Kyle, we tackle the fallacy that kink is strictly a trauma response and instead reveal its potential for healing and empowerment. Through candid conversations, we explore the fluid dynamics of dominance and submission, the role of 'brat energy' in BDSM, and how these practices can lead to personal growth and deeper self-understanding.As we peel away societal taboos, our guests share their transformative journeys from mere participants to passionate educators within the kink community. They illuminate the joys of helping others safely unearth their desires, pushing past conventional boundaries to a place of profound erotic expression. We also dissect the critical role of consent and the Wheel of Consent, emphasizing how these frameworks can foster a safe and fulfilling exploration of one's sexual landscape.Join us for this thought-provoking session where we embrace our primal instincts and redefine what it means to engage in role-playing, objectification, and the pursuit of pleasure. With practical advice and shared vulnerabilities, this episode promises a welcoming space for the curious, the seasoned, and everyone in between who seeks to understand the profound impact of kink on personal transformation and sexual empowerment. Ashley and Kyle guide us through this rich tapestry, leaving us with a deeper appreciation for the nuanced world of kink and the liberation that comes with embracing our true desires.Support the show

Sex transmutation is one of the most important skills men can learn. Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich - dedicated a full chapter of his book to "The Mystery of Sexual Transmutation" as a step to greater riches in life - but he failed to explain the real techniques for how he and other successful men have used sexual transmutation in their lives... In this episode, I'll show you how.🔴 🎥 You can also watch this episode on Youtube.MICROCOSMIC ORBIT VIDEOS:💫 Microcosmic Orbit Diagram 💫 Microcosmic Orbit Partner Practice*(I forgot to add these graphics in the Youtube version of this interview, so I'm adding them here).EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:0:00 Sex Transmutation Intro2:44 What is Sex Transmutation?3:40 Practical Examples5:24 Transmutation of Ejaculation During Sex7:08 Porn: Transmuting the Desire9:15 Sex Transmutation at Work12:13 Sexual Desire is Healthy (Don't Ignore It)12:54 Somatics & Transmutation Example16:52 When Someone Is NOT Attracted to You17:45 The REACTIVE Model of Sex Transmutation29:01 Taylor's Personal Sex Example33:44 The PROACTIVE Model of Sex Transmutation37:39 Intro to Sexual Energy Integration Exercise38:36 Exercise: Sexual Energy Integration43:41 How to End Sex Without Ejaculation45:25 Sexual Energy Conservation VS Cultivation49:28 The Most Important Technique of All...---------------------ORGASMIC MASTERY COURSE:🔱 Master this practice in the bedroom, learn to last as long as you want, have strong erections, and experience full body orgasmic pleasure with my upcoming Orgasmic Mastery Course that begins on February 8th.Support the show

Want to boost your testosterone naturally? This episode of the Sex Upgraded Podcast will tell you how. Join Taylor & male hormone expert Dr. Tracy Gapin for a practical & motivating conversation about how YOU can be the best version of yourself by optimizing all of your male hormone levels.Hormone optimization is key to overall vitality, with insights into libido, peak performance, mental clarity, and conquering life's challenges. Check out my personal testosterone journey in this video. And...🔴 Get Your Testosterone Levels Tested HereAnd use this code: TAYLORNEWYEAR for a big discountIn this episode, you'll:• Learn about the science behind lab tests, stress's impact on hormones, and strategies to combat age-related changes. • Gain wisdom on decoding your body's signals through advanced diagnostics and lifestyle adjustments. • Discover tools for a revolutionized existence, including mastering metabolism with continuous glucose monitoring and employing heart rate variability in stress management. • Better understand how you can have longevity, energy, strength, and enduring zest for life.EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:00:00 - Intro01:27 - Opening02:15 - Dr. Tracy Gapin's Background05:44 - Common Underlying Causes of Hormonal Problems 07:09 - What Is Low Testosterone 11:04 - Stress and The Link Between Testosterone and Cortisol 16:13 - The Effects of Low Testosterone on the Mind & Body18:52 - Ways to Improve Testosterone Levels20:08 - Impact of Low Testosterone on Society 21:52 - Minimizing Exposure to the Toxins in Our Environment 25:19 - Lifestyle & Time Frame To Improve Hormonal Levels34:22 - Living With Suboptimal Levels of Testosterone Without Realizing35:56 - The Natural Process of Aging and Finding Balance with Performance39:30 - The Feeling and Experience of Optimal Hormonal Levels41:47 - Healthy, Normal Sex Drive After 40 Years44:38 - Advances in Men's Medicine Space 51:14 - Living With Intention, Sleep & Diet56:35 - Final Advice 58:19 - How To Find and Connect With Dr. Tracy Gapin---------------------🔱  CONNECT WITH DR. GAPIN:🔸  Gapin Institute🔸 Dr. Gapin's Website🔸 High Performance Handbook---------------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course🔸 Semen Retention Mastery🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:🔸 Sex Upgraded Podcast🔸 Instagram🔸 Website---------------------#testosterone #menshealth #lifeoptimization #hormonesSupport the show

This episode is a look into my personal life - because I want to be transparent with you around my professional & life development as a teacher. You'll hear about the 3 big trainings I'm personally enrolled in for 2024 (and why)... and you'll also hear my 3 main personal growth areas I want to work on too.🔴🎥 You can watch this episode on Youtube here. The best way to ask me anything about this episode would be to comment on the youtube version I linked to above. And if you have BDSM recommendations, please feel free to DM me on Instagram. I'm all ears.MY 2024 PERSONAL/PROFESSIONAL EDUCATION PLANSomatic Experiencing Practitioner TrainingEmbodied Men's Leadership Training (with John Wineland)Somatic Coach Training Program (with Strozzi Institute)RESOURCES MENTIONED:My Testosterone Video (On Youtube)Sex Upgraded Podcast (On Youtube)🔱 UPCOMING TRAINING FOR MEN:🔸 The Orgasmic Mastery Course begins on February 8th, 2024. This is a 10-week training for any man who wants to become the best lover they can be - the kind of lover who blows his partner's mind - AND feels 100% confident and sexually alive in the process. Check out the course page for more info.EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:0:00 Why I Made This Episode2:30 The 3 Big Trainings I'm Taking in 20243:01 1 - Somatic Experiencing Practitioner Training5:52 2 - Embodied Men's Leadership Training8:28 3 - Strozzi Somatic Coaching Training10:23 BDSM Training? (I Need Your Advice...)11:21 Male Hormone Optimization13:17 ADHD & Sex16:16 Living a Balanced Life...18:11 Request: I Need Your Help...Support the show

Have you ever thought about becoming a sex coach for men? What does it take? Are there any requirements or certifications? Perhaps more importantly, what's it actually like to be a sex coach for men?In this episode you'll hear some behind the scenes stories and experiences from both Cam Fraser and I (we're both certified sexologists and full time sex coaches for men), and you'll hear how we both got to be where we are today.You'll also learn about his new sex coach certification training (with tons of great guest instructors) for people who want to become professional sex coaches that specifically work with men.I've looked through the syllabus, and it looks pretty awesome. I'm going to actually take one part of the training too: the SAR (described in the episode).If you're interested, check out the links below:🔱 MEN'S SEX COACH TRAINING:🔸 Check out the sex coaching certification program here.🔸 And join here: https://bit.ly/Mens-Sex-Coaching-Program*If you join through this link, I'll receive a small commission as a thank you for connecting you to this program. That commission will help me continue to create this podcast. Thank you! :)EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:00:00 Intro & Welcome08:53 Cam's Journey to Becoming a Sex Coach for Men20:26 Benefits of Working With a Sex Coach33:02 Understanding Masculinity and Sexological Approaches47:12 Importance of Anti-Racism Education in Coaching53:39 Exploring Tantra Communities and Sexuality59:49 Sexual Attitudes Reassessment (SAR) and Training Program-----------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL SELF-MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course (Begins July 2023)🔸 Semen Retention Mastery🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taylorclarkjohnsonWebsite: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/Support the show

If you're a Christian, or if you've ever been impacted by Christianity in any way, this episode should be next on your list. Dr. Kevin Jenson believes that it's possible for Christians to have amazing, sacred sex - and that these experiences are also supported by the bible. Kind of mind blowing stuff...🔴 🎥 - You can also watch this episode on Youtube.Some topics we cover:Is sex sinful?Is masturbation sinful?What about sex before marriage? Is that a sin?Can sex be sacred as a Christian?What does sacred sex mean from a Christian perspective?What does the bible say about masturbation?What does the bible say about sex before marriage?What does the bible say about sex in general?Join Dr. Kevin Jenson and I to explore the cultural divide between sex and spirituality, while examining Christianity, epistemology, and ancient texts, to create an entirely new perspective of healthy sexuality that's possible for Christians - without losing their faith.Kevin Jenson is a distinguished author and scholar, who shares insights from his life path, bridging the gap between his Christian faith and sexual desires. And for the record, I don't see myself as a Christian... though as I write this on Christmas Eve, I'm about to head into a church service with my family. I grew up in a Christian household, and was heavily influenced by this faith. That's why I thought it'd be interesting to do this episode.I've also worked with a LOT of Christian men, who want to have great sex and NOT let go of their faith. I want to support them in their desires for that, and so whatever positive content I can create to help these men and their partners, the better.EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:00:00 - Intro01:28 - Opening03:34 - Kevin's Background09:17 - The Conflict Between Sexuality and Spirituality12:22 - Epistemology & the Ways of Knowing19:20 - Christian Views on Sex & Masturbation23:17 - Sex Positive View within Christianity31:45 - The Original Intent about Sexuality in the Bible36:59 - The Church & The Dichotomy of Healthy Sexuality41:48 - The Myth of Onan & Is Masturbation Sinful48:07 - The Christian View of Male/Female Dynamic in Society53:24 - "Porneia"  59:17 - Prayerful Sex1:05:41 - Kevin's Journey of Sharing His Work in The (Christian) World1:12:02 - In & Out Group in the Christian Community1:15:31 - How to Connect with Kevin1:16:46 - Christian Trauma---------------------🔱  CONNECT WITH KEVIN:🔸 Special page for Sex Upgraded podcast listeners🔸 Kevin’s Website🔸 Kevin's Instagram: @drkevinjenson---------------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course🔸 Semen Retention Mastery🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:🔸 Sex Upgraded Podcast🔸 Instagram🔸 Support the show

This is a serious and sensitive episode... for any man who has ever hurt a woman - accidentally or otherwise. Specifically, for any man who has caused harm (myself included), and who wants to do better... Who wants to heal, offer repair, get humble, grow and become a better version of themselves.There's no shaming in this episode... Papillon and I wanted to create this for all of the men who want to improve themselves, but don't know where to go or what resources to turn to.EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:00:00 Intro01:28 Opening03:02 Papillon's Professional Background03:58 Sexual Assault & Crossing Boundaries 09:35 Self-Reflection on Causing Sexual Harm 14:47 Finding a Therapist to Talk with17:40 Other Options to Help with Self-Reflection21:28 Healing Without Contacting the Person You've Sexually Assaulted29:21 Recognizing When We Have Harmed Another Person35:56 Finding Space to Share And Reflect 38:25 What to Do If You Realize You Have Assaulted Someone47:40 Centering The Survivor's Needs 52:56 Facing the Pain of the Realization54:55 Can a Changed Person Be Seen in a New Light57:02 Restorative Justice58:54 Accountability and Developing Self-Awareness1:05:33 Resources and Materials to Look UpGENERATED EPISODE DESCRIPTION:In this episode, Taylor explores how we can prioritize survivors' needs in sexual assault cases, with insights from returning guest, Papillon, a licensed clinical mental health counselor specializing in sexual trauma. Discover scenarios where boundaries are crossed, emphasizing humility, growth, and understanding survivors' needs before personal desires. Delve into the challenges survivors face, the impact of public disclosure, and the potential for restorative justice processes. Listen now, as Taylor and Papillon reflect on their past actions, and discuss learning from mistakes with empathy and accountability. The conversation touches on sociopathic tendencies, self-reflection, and finding support in affinity groups, offering condensed insights into the complexities of addressing sexual harm and promoting healing.🔱  PAPILLON’S WEBSITE & RECOMMENDATIONS🔸 Papillon's Website🔸 Consent “Cup of Tea” Cartoon 🔸 Consent “Cup of Tea” Cartoon for Kids 🔸 Consent “Cup of Tea” Cartoon (Clean Version) 🔸 Feel free to send us more resources on this that you recommend.---------------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course🔸 Semen Retention Mastery🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:🔸 Sex Upgraded Podcast🔸 Instagram🔸 WebsiteSupport the show

What is the difference between Neo Tantra and Classical Tantra? What do they have in common, and what can we learn from them both, to implement into our own lives?  In this episode, Taylor explores tantric wisdom and history with Hema; a gifted mentor and teacher offering unique perspective from her upbringing and life full of experience with tantric traditions. Press play to learn about the historical complexities of Tantra, its cultural branches, the way it challenges societal norms, and can guide you beyond better sexual experiences and into deeper spiritual growth.EPISODE TIMES & TOPICS:00:00 Intro & Welcome02:36 Hema’s Story05:03 Neo Tantra & Classical Tantra Explained10:21 What is the history of Tantra?19:10 Why Tantra is considered the “left hand path” in India21:46 Tantra as a practice of deconstructing the ego28:47 Sexuality as the primordial force where we get our power33:53 Tantra for Common Householders37:13 How we can be overly attached to sex39:14 Meditation practices for deep states of bliss43:00 How Taylor first found deep presence & bliss45:25 Enlightenment through Tantra50:11 “Spiritual Psychopaths” in Tantra57:48 Practices Hema Recommends1:01:42 Closing🔱  CONNECT WITH HEMA:🔸 Work with Hema: https://talk2hema.youcanbook.me/ 🔸 Hema’s Website: https://hemaholisticmystic.com/ ---------------------🔱  TAYLOR'S SEXUAL MASTERY COURSES:🔸 Orgasmic Mastery Course: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/orgasmic-mastery-course/🔸 Semen Retention Mastery: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/semen-retention-mastery/🔱 TAYLOR'S FREE GUIDES:🔸 Free 7-Day Semen Retention Challenge: https://learn.taylorjohnson.life/free-7-day-semen-retention-challenge🔸 Free Ejaculation Control Guide: https://learn.taylorjohnson.life/Free-Ejaculation-Control-Training🔱 CONNECT WITH TAYLOR:🔸 Sex Upgraded Podcast: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/podcast🔸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taylorclarkjohnson🔸 Website: https://www.taylorjohnson.life/---------------------#neotantra #tantra #tantricsexualitySupport the show