Embodied Love Lounge

Your back aches. You miss his eyes. You want to move, and something tells you to stay still so you don't ruin it.If I say something, he'll stop.Press play and give yourself another option. Aaron Michael and Dr. Saida Desilets talk through the side saddle, the halfway point between your back and your belly, and the place Dr. Saida calls "the queenly rest." It's where you can stretch, look at each other, and let the whole thing keep moving.Listen for:• The relief of changing what you need without ending the moment• A good laugh at one husband's "T. Rex arms," and the easy answer to his question• What it sounds like when Dr. Saida describes feeling weightless• The freedom to move your hips without spending all your energy• How your partner can cool off while you keep your pace• Why a position you only meant to pass through can become the highlightHere's a sneak peek into what you're missing… In the members-only episode...You’ll learn:How to get your body used to depth by pausing, so depth stops being something you brace againstHow to bring him in at your pace, using your breath and your handsThe hand signals that steer his depth and pace without a wordHow to shift into side saddle from doggy, from your back, or from a lazy-morning spoon, and the wriggle that tells him you want toWhat the pause does inside your body, until it feels “very sensual”The leg move that brings “a deep sense of relaxation, but also intense arousal” at the very same timeHow to be moved into it without the whiplash, and how to guide a partner who has never done itHow to try it clothes on first, so it never turns awkward in the momentThe two bed mistakes that kill it, and what to say when they happenHow to use it to help him last longer, so you both get moreWhat you really don’t want to miss is the erotic insert...And in the erotic insert, the conversation becomes an experience. It opens with a woman saying what her body wants, in the plainest words there are. What happens next is for members only.Want to open the door?→ GET THE FULL EPISODE + EROTIC INSERT:

51 Days Without Ejaculating. Sex Every Day. And She's Craving Him More.What if the secret to becoming a more desirable man wasn't having less sex, but learning to hold more pleasure?While the internet gears up for No Nut November, Aaron Michael is already on day 51 without ejaculating. But here's the twist: he and Dr. Saida Desilets are still having sex every day, sometimes for an hour or more.And according to Dr. Saida, the results aren't just happening in his body. They're happening between them.More desire. More anticipation. A man whose presence she can feel before he even touches her.In this episode of Embodied Love Lounge, Aaron and Dr. Saida challenge the idea that a man's sexual experience must end in ejaculation. What happens when he stops chasing release and starts training his capacity for pleasure?You'll hear about the twelve wild horses of male sexual energy, the shame men quietly carry around arousal, and how owning your desire can transform the way a woman experiences you.Abstain or train? What if you've been asking the wrong question?Discover what becomes possible when you stop treating ejaculation as the finish line.Explore Embodied Love University: https://learning.embodiedloveuniversity.com/registerReady to train instead of abstain? Discover Aaron Michael's 21-day men's program at https://YeahFap.com

EP 75: Missionary: Boring or Mind-Blowing?Description:Earbuds in? Good. The lights dim. He leans in. And you're already yawning.Your mind is on snacks, the PTA, the errands. Then his weight lands on your chest, you can't breathe, and you wait for it to be over.Now stay in the same position and let it change. His weight on you like a warm blanket, and you can breathe. His breath hot on your neck. Your hips free to roll. You pull him close, push him back for air, and take what you want.Aaron Michael and Dr. Saida Desilets take you from the missionary you know to the one you've been missing.Want the rest? In the members-only episode, Dr. Saida tells you why she's "never going back to a thruster." In the erotic insert, she asks him to do it the way so many men do and stops him within seconds. What happens next is for members only.→GET THE FULL EPISODE + EROTIC INSERT

Surprise! This one’s a BONUS Embodied Love Lounge episode. Aaron Michael and Dr. Saida were so excited about this topic, they just couldn’t wait to share it! They get honest about ‘woman on top’: why it hurts for so many women...You climb on top. His hands clamp onto your hips. Then a sharp, crampy hit deep inside steals your breath.Maybe this is just me. Maybe this is how it's supposed to feel.So you brace. You hold back. You keep your hips careful so he can last, and you never find out what your body would do if you let it go.Aaron Michael and Dr. Saida Desilets have a name for that moment: a signal. Your body telling you to stop, reset, and move another way.And when you do? Your hips are free. The pleasure builds until it shudders through you. Dr. Saida calls what comes forward "my own erotic wildness."In this Embodied Love Lounge episode, they get honest about woman on top: why it hurts for so many women, and why it's so often the one position where a woman who struggles to climax with a partner finally can.You'll discover:• What your body is telling you when your breath stops and your hands brace• Why the hottest moments on top show up when you're rolling and tangled together• Why women who can't climax from penetration so often find it on top• What it feels like to take your pleasure and then surrender to it• The slow-building pleasure that ends in full-body shudders, and why this position reaches itHere’s a sneak peek into what you’re missing… In the members-only episode...Dr. Saida gets personal about what she learned in her twenties, because she wanted pleasure to last way longer. Then she says the words so many of us needed years ago: “Go at your pace.”And in the erotic insert, recorded separately and layered in, the conversation becomes an experience. It starts on an ordinary workday, two people distracted and disconnected. What happens next is for members only.Want to open the door? → GET THE FULL EPISODE + EROTIC INSERT → JOIN EMBODIED LOVE UNIVERSITY FREE

Your partner reaches for you, and your whole body braces.Your breath stops. Your stomach knots. You want to be close, and some part of you is getting ready for a fight.Afterward come the stories: “I'm sabotaging myself. I'm too damaged for this. Why can't I just relax?”Somatic trauma therapist Barbara Collier has a different name for it: an adaptive response. Your nervous system learned long ago that closeness could cost you something, and it's still protecting you from the there and then while you're trying to live in the here and now.In this episode, Dr. Saida and Aaron Michael sit down with Barbara, a former intensive care nurse who has spent two decades as a somatic trauma therapist, to explore what happens in your body when triggers hijack intimacy, and how you find your way back.You'll discover:• Why arousal can feel like alarm, when anxiety and excitement run on the same charge• Why calling it a "pattern" keeps you stuck in shame, and why curiosity changes everything• What living with one foot on the gas and one on the brake does to your health over years• Why trauma that happened before you had language rarely shifts through talk alone• The first small step back toward pleasure when you feel numb, tense, or in painThen it gets personal in the members-only section.Barbara shares how, decades into her career and freshly divorced, she had decided she didn't care if she ever had sex again, and what she found when she questioned that. You'll hear the difference between your body's yes and the "social yes" you were trained to give, the early warning signs your body sends before an argument starts, and what to do when your partner gets triggered and every instinct says run or fix it.And in the members-only guest insert, Barbara guides a short practice you can take anywhere. Dr. Saida said afterward the world felt "friendlier and less pokey." Then Barbara shows how the same attention can reach the places where pain lives, including the pelvis and old scar tissue.👉 GET THE FULL EPISODE + BARBARA'S GUIDED PRACTICE: https://learning.embodiedloveuniversity.com/podcastsLEARN MORE ABOUT BARBARA COLLIER → https://barbaracollier.com

Walk toward the lions. Read the wind. Trust your senses. Know when to lead. Know when to follow. And NEVER assume you know what happens next.That’s how Big C moves through the African wilderness.Now bring those same instincts into sex, love and relationship.Fresh from 10 days in the wild, Dr. Saida and Aaron Michael sit down with Sicelo “Big C” Mbatha, wilderness guide and author of Black Lion, and discover just how much the wild has to teach us about being human.Why do we stop truly seeing someone we’ve loved for years? Why can trying to recreate great sex get in the way of great sex? And what can lions and elephants teach us about power, protection, cooperation and leadership?As Big C shares how he navigates a world where everything is alive, changing and communicating, Dr. Saida stops him:“Every word you said can be translated to the bedroom.”Lions. Sex. Power. Intuition. Partnership. The wilderness.This conversation goes places you won’t expect.We put it into practice.Aaron Michael had just tried intimate waxing for the first time. He was tender, turned on, and suddenly some of our usual ways of playing were off the table.So what do you do when you want each other... but the usual trail is closed?You’ll listen in as we negotiate new boundaries, read each other’s bodies in real time, adapt when something doesn’t feel the way we expect, and get creative with the pleasure that IS available.The lesson of the wild, made flesh: Stop assuming you know the trail. Pay attention. Adapt.👉 UPGRADE TO THE MEMBERS EXPERIENCE + HEAR THE EROTIC INSERT: https://learning.embodiedloveuniversity.com/podcasts GET BIG C’S BOOK → https://www.amazon.com/dp/177619148XEXPERIENCE THE WILD WITH US IN AUGUST 2027 → https://EmbodiedLoveUniversity.com/africa

Let’s kill this tired idea that women simply want sex less than men.If a one-night stand offered you a tiny chance of orgasm and a much bigger chance of pregnancy, disease, judgment, shame, pain, or disappointment, would you be excited by the invitation?Exactly.Men and women are not being offered the same meal. One may expect a ”four-star” experience. The other is being handed “cold ravioli” from a can and told she must not be hungry.In this episode, we examine what college sex and the orgasm gap reveal about desire. More importantly, we show you why this problem does not end when college does. The same pattern follows people into long-term relationships, where years of unsatisfying sex can look like a mysterious “death of libido.”Maybe your desire didn’t disappear.Maybe your body simply learned that what comes next isn’t worth getting excited about.We break down the five foundations that can change that:• Understanding your anatomy as a living system of pleasure• Moving your body instead of waiting for someone else to perform pleasure on you• Building relaxed arousal instead of racing toward release• Feeling your yes, your no, and your way through a maybe• Using your mind to intensify pleasure instead of watching yourself performThen we take the gloves off in the members-only section.Aaron Michael reveals why his early sexual experiences were radically different from the three-minute encounters his college friends described. Dr. Saida shares how she explored one-night stands without surrendering her pleasure, safety, boundaries, or dignity. We talk about choosing someone for an erotic experience without pretending it must become a relationship, and why clear beginnings, middles, and endings make it easier to be fully present.We also share what happened when our own body mechanics failed during sex on an unstable riverbed, and how changing the environment turned a painful experience into pleasure.That’s the point.Good sex is not magic. Bad sex is not destiny. Your body responds to what is actually happening.And in the erotic audio insert, you’ll hear what happens when two people stop performing sex and begin creating it together.

You’re on opposite ends of the couch, and neither of you is going to be the one to close the gap. Episode 70 traces how you got here, the shift from teammates to competitors, the quiet withholding, the honeymoon phase everyone blames instead of the years of small transactions that followed it.•        Learn why “taking one for the team” quietly kills desire for both people•        Learn the difference between being teammates and being competitors in bed•        Learn why the honeymoon phase was never built to last, and what replaces it if you let it•        Learn why your partner doesn’t know what to do when your body changes, and why that’s not a character flaw•        Learn why there’s no expiry date on your sex life, no matter your ageAnd then they took this discussion into the bedroom. Something we can’t share here… is the behind-the-scenes story that reveals the actual touch, breath, and hands-on skill Aaron Michael teaches men one-on-one, the kind that restores blood flow and brings a body back to life.Click here when you’re ready to learn what to do when your partner says no, so the yes can actually arrive – EmbodiedLoveUniversity.com

She hated it for years. Not "wasn't sure about it." Hated it. This is Dr. Saida telling you exactly why.Two bodies, tangled, mouths where mouths politely shouldn't go, it looks like the peak of intimacy. Then you try it, and your neck aches, and you're choking, and you start wondering what's wrong with you. Nothing is. This episode is Dr. Saida finally telling the whole truth. As the commercial says, “But wait, there’s more!” Let’s have a peek behind the paywall of the Member’s only episode…Get the exact hip and hand signals that turn 69 from clumsy into electricLearn the standing variation Dr. Saida calls one of her all-time favoritesDiscover how to solve the height-and-weight mismatch that ruins this position for most couplesGet coached through the transitions that keep you from ever feeling stuck or pinnedHear a real, unscripted moment between Dr. Saida and Aaron Michael that closes out the episode, not a performance, just themOpen the door to more at EmbodiedLoveUniversity.com

What if sexual desire could make you clearer instead of more impulsive?“Post nut clarity” has become shorthand for the moment when sexual urgency disappears and supposedly sensible decision-making returns. But what if getting rid of the charge is not the same as developing erotic maturity?Dr. Saida and Aaron Michael challenge the idea that desire itself is the problem. They explore the difference between sympathetic arousal, which can narrow your focus, and relaxed arousal, which can expand your senses, presence, and ability to choose.You’ll discover why horniness is not the same as mate selection, how your self-pleasure habits may influence the partners you choose, and why racing toward release can train your body for disconnection, depletion, and diminishing desire.This conversation offers a different possibility: learning to remain grounded while aroused, enjoy sexual tension without immediately eliminating it, and use erotic energy to support discernment, creativity, intimacy, and long-term romance.Listen free, then continue your exploration inside Embodied Love University, where Playful Explorers can access this episode, more than 60 past episodes, foundational lessons, and freemium content.