How to Properly Process Pain | Let's Talk About Toxic Positivity | Ken and Tabatha Claytor

Send us a textThe crushing weight of depression doesn't just affect the person diagnosed—it transforms marriages, reshaping how partners interact and survive together. Having walked this path ourselves, we're pulling back the curtain on what it truly takes to support a spouse battling the darkness of depression.Tabatha shares her 12-year journey through severe depression that began in childhood following her father's death and experiences with abuse. The physical manifestations—debilitating migraines, panic attacks, insomnia—became as real as the emotional pain. Yet after finding spiritual healing at 24, she's experienced over two decades of complete freedom from these symptoms."Depression isn't occasional sadness—it's getting stuck, becoming debilitated by it," Tabatha explains. "It's not something you can simply snap out of." This misunderstanding often leads to shame and isolation for those suffering.Ken reveals his own unexpected battle with depression following church leadership challenges and betrayal from those close to him. During this dark season, Tabatha became his bridge to healing—not by forcing him out of depression, but by supporting his vision when he couldn't see it himself, gathering resources to help him move forward, and giving him space when needed.We explore the powerful connection between unforgiveness and depression, sharing how forgiveness became the key that unlocked Tabitha's healing. The spiritual dimensions of depression often go unaddressed in clinical settings, yet we've witnessed countless breakthroughs when both spiritual and natural interventions work together.For those supporting a depressed spouse: speak life, not criticism. Understand their root struggles. Take spiritual authority over the situation while addressing practical needs. Build your own support system so you don't become depleted. And never stop believing that complete healing is possible—because we've lived it.If depression has invaded your marriage, join us for this episode filled with hope, practical wisdom, and the promise that depression doesn't have to be a life sentence. Your breakthrough might be closer than you think.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textHave you ever wondered why so many marriages fall apart even though they started off great? A lot of it comes down to what people focus on when choosing who to marry.In this honest and real conversation, we talk about 5 important qualities every man should look for in a wife—things that go deeper than just looks or money. We even share real stories from men (like barbers!) who said they just wanted someone who wouldn’t tear them down emotionally.We also talk about how both men and women sometimes bring pain from the past into relationships. These hurts can cause women to react harshly and men to feel disrespected, which leads to a toxic cycle in marriage.But we don’t just talk about the problems—we give practical advice on how to recognize a godly wife. We cover things like respect, spiritual strength, true submission (and what it really means), being strong under pressure, and most importantly—having a real relationship with God that comes before even the marriage.Whether you’re single, dating, or married, this episode will help you see what it takes to build a healthy, God-centered relationship.Share this with someone who needs to hear that strong love is built on character—not just chemistry.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textWhat happens when faith meets entrepreneurship? For many believers, there's an unnecessary tension between pursuing business success and honoring God. But what if prosperity with purpose is exactly what God intended?Ken and Tabatha Claytor bring a refreshing perspective to the intersection of faith and business, drawing from their experiences as successful entrepreneurs before their 18-year journey in pastoral ministry. Having built multiple businesses from scratch, they share candid insights about how biblical principles transformed their approach to entrepreneurship.The conversation tackles head-on the misconceptions many Christians hold about money and success. Ken challenges the notion that spiritual maturity requires financial struggle, pointing to scripture that reveals God's pleasure in the prosperity of His people. Rather than demonizing wealth, the Claytors emphasize stewardship – recognizing that all resources belong to God and should ultimately advance His purposes.Four powerful biblical principles emerge as the framework for godly success: integrity that refuses to cut corners, honesty that may sometimes cost you the deal, generosity that combats greed, and divine partnerships that yield eternal returns. These aren't just theoretical concepts but battle-tested strategies that have transformed countless businesses.Perhaps most compelling is the idea that believers don't need to compartmentalize their faith and work. By redeeming Monday through Friday and seeing the marketplace as mission field, entrepreneurs can experience supernatural favor and direction. The Claytors share remarkable stories of divine guidance in business decisions that led to unexpected breakthroughs and profitability.Whether you're a seasoned business owner or an aspiring entrepreneur, this conversation will transform how you view the relationship between faith and commerce. Discover how giving your prosperity purpose might be the key to both business growth and spiritual fulfillment.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textGET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textWhat do you do when someone wounds you deeply? The reality is that emotional hurt is part of the human experience, but far too many people remain trapped in cycles of pain, resentment, and withdrawal long after the initial injury. In this candid and powerful conversation, Ken and Tabatha expose what they call a "hurt epidemic" sweeping through communities and churches worldwide.Drawing from personal experience with trauma, rejection, and betrayal, they offer a refreshingly practical approach to emotional healing. You'll discover the transformative principle of "cast, don't carry" - a visualization exercise where you literally hand your hurts over to a higher power. This isn't theoretical spirituality but a tangible practice that has brought freedom to countless lives.The biblical story of Joseph becomes a powerful case study in overcoming significant betrayal without becoming bitter. His declaration to his brothers - "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good" - provides a template for anyone who's been wounded by others yet refuses to let those wounds define their destiny.What sets this conversation apart is its balanced approach. Ken and Tabatha acknowledge the reality of legitimate hurts while challenging the tendency toward perpetual victimhood. They distinguish between "hurts that are hurtful" and "perceived hurts," offering wisdom for addressing both. Their perspective shift from "victim to victor" isn't about denying pain but refusing to let it have the final word in your story.Whether you're carrying church hurt, relational betrayal, or family wounds, this episode provides the practical tools and spiritual insights needed to break free and reclaim your purpose. Share this episode with someone who needs to hear that their greatest pain might become their greatest purpose.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textTen powerful strategies every single person needs to hear about preparing for future relationships while fully embracing their current season. This candid conversation cuts through common misconceptions about singleness, offering practical wisdom that balances spiritual growth with real-world relationship readiness.We start by addressing the comparison trap that leaves many singles feeling inadequate when scrolling through social media. Those picture-perfect marriages you're envying? They might not be as perfect as they appear. Instead of comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else's highlight reel, we explore how to find contentment right where you are.The enemy loves feeding singles lies about their worth and desirability. We break down these deceptions and replace them with truth about who you really are. Whether confronting messages from past relationships or battling internal insecurities, this segment provides the ammunition you need to stand confidently in your identity.Finding the balance between being too picky and settling for less than God's best presents a challenge for many singles. We provide clear guidance on distinguishing between superficial preferences and non-negotiable values, helping you navigate dating decisions with wisdom rather than desperation or unrealistic standards.Your single season offers unparalleled opportunities for financial preparation, emotional healing, and spiritual growth. We detail specific actions you can take now—from eliminating debt to addressing past trauma to deepening your spiritual foundation—that will position you for a healthy future relationship if that's God's plan.Rather than viewing singleness as merely waiting, we invite you to embrace this season as purposeful preparation. The choices you make now lay the groundwork for whatever lies ahead in your relational journey, creating a stronger foundation for potential marriage and greater contentment regardless of your future relationship status.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textWhat happens when a marriage teeters on the edge of collapse? Ken and Tabatha Claytor don't hold back as they reveal the raw truth about their first two years of marriage—when Ken had already planned to divorce Tabitha and she was battling severe depression. This powerful episode takes you on their 25-year journey from those desperate early days to the thriving relationship they enjoy today. With refreshing honesty, they share how Tabitha's miraculous deliverance from depression became a turning point, allowing her to "pump the brakes" on their divorce and begin rebuilding what seemed irreparably broken.The Claytors distill their hard-won wisdom into three essential principles that have transformed their marriage: making your spouse your absolute priority (yes, even above your children), building unshakable trustworthiness, and developing effective communication skills. They offer practical strategies for each principle, from establishing boundaries that protect your marriage to creating safe spaces for vulnerable conversations.Their discussion on trustworthiness is particularly revealing as Tabatha shares what has built her confidence in Ken over the decades—his authentic relationship with God behind closed doors and his consistent character across all settings. Meanwhile, their playful back-and-forth about returning text messages demonstrates how even the strongest marriages navigate everyday frustrations.Whether you're struggling to save a troubled relationship or simply want to strengthen an already good marriage, this episode delivers hope and practical tools you can implement immediately. As Ken powerfully reminds us, "It doesn't matter how bad your marriage might seem right now. There's a better day ahead."GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textWould you want to live with you? This powerful question lies at the heart of Ken and Tabatha's wisdom-packed conversation about marriage and relationships. Drawing from over 24 years of marriage experience, they tackle the essential principle that life is simply too short to sweat the small stuff.The couple explores how our memories work – we remember wedding days and children's births, not dirty dishes or minor frustrations. Yet many marriages crumble over "irreconcilable differences" that partners can't even specifically recall years later. Through personal stories and biblical principles, Ken and Tabatha outline practical ways to focus on what truly matters.One fascinating distinction they unpack is the difference between mothering and wifely support. A mother hovers and dictates, while a wife comes alongside to support and uplift. They introduce the concept of "incubation" – how a wife can nurture her husband's vision like a seed, helping it grow through encouragement rather than criticism. This partnership approach allows both spouses to rise together, creating a marriage where both partners feel valued and respected.Kindness emerges as a central theme throughout their conversation. Ken and Tabitha challenge the notion that kindness equals weakness, pointing to scripture that shows how love "is not easily angered" and "keeps no record of wrongs." They suggest becoming a "CEO" – Chief Encouragement Officer – in your home, creating an atmosphere of celebration rather than criticism. The episode culminates with a beautiful exploration of 1 Corinthians 13, revealing how these ancient principles of love provide practical solutions for modern relationship challenges.Whether you're newlyweds or celebrating decades together, this episode offers transformative perspectives on creating a marriage filled with patience, kindness and mutual support. Subscribe now and join us next Thursday for another powerful conversation about doing life together with purpose and love!GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textFacing the death of a loved one can shatter our world and challenge our deepest beliefs. When Ken's mother passed away after a four-year battle with cancer, he found himself wrestling with profound theological questions. Despite believing in divine healing and standing on promises from Scripture, his mom transitioned to heaven at age 69, leaving him to navigate complex emotions of grief, faith, and acceptance.This raw, heartfelt conversation explores the mystery of death from a biblical perspective, reframing it not as a fearful end but as a transition between realms. "I didn't lose her," Ken shares, "I know exactly where she is. She's with Jesus." For believers, death becomes less a tragedy and more a graduation—painful for those left behind but joyful for those who've entered eternity free from suffering.Tabatha vulnerably shares her own journey through the fear of death during her cancer battle, describing how studying near-death experiences and Scripture transformed her perspective. "I am not afraid to die," she testifies. "This is a promotion. This is someplace that we are all going." Their discussion demystifies what happens when we die, offering comfort through biblical truths that affirm continued existence, reunion with loved ones, and the promise of new bodies.The most powerful moment comes when Ken discusses Hebrews 11:13, which speaks of those who "died in faith, not having received the promise." His mother exemplified this—maintaining unwavering faith despite not seeing her healing manifested on earth. "I can't make a healing come," Ken reflects. "I'm the mailman; I deliver the package, but I can't make the package. God is the one who heals."Whether you're actively grieving or seeking to understand death from a faith perspective, this conversation offers both compassion and clarity. The hosts remind us that while grief is natural, we don't grieve like those without hope. Your tears are valid, but they need not be permanent. Connect with us at Alive Church or grab our devotional "Living at a Nine" to continue your journey toward healing and hope.GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]

Send us a textA focus on becoming a Chief Encouragement Officer can need positive transformations in household dynamics. Understanding the CEO role expands beyond business concepts into personal relationships. • Discussing the significance of encouragement in building strong marriages • Highlighting the need for positivity over authority in families • Understanding encouragement as an integral part of personal and spiritual growth • Offering practical steps to implement encouragement in daily life • Recognizing the importance of self-encouragement before uplifting others • Addressing the challenges and negativity that can permeate home life GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888Support Our Ministry: https://myalivechurch.org/giveConnect with us:- Website:https://www.kenclaytor.comhttps://www.tabathaclaytor.comhttps://www.myalivechurch.org- Socials:Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/TikTok-@Ken_Claytor@Tabathaclaytor@myalivechurchFacebook-https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytorhttps://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch- Ask us questions: [email protected]