Beat Motel Zine

This week, Andrew and Jago dive into the chaotic world of **musical rivalries**, from playground-level spats to outright murderous feuds. Highlights include: - Jago’s dangerous addiction to seaside 2p machines, proving the only real winner is the arcade owner. - The eternal bitterness of Dave Mustaine (_35 million albums sold but still salty_). - Blur vs. Oasis—teen idols or commercial gladiators? - Charles Manson: misunderstood artist or murderous twit? (_Spoiler: Jago’s hero worship is… complicated_). - Brian Harvey of E17’s many adventures—from parking tickets to jacket potato chaos. With riffs of the week by **Will Haven** and **Jesu**, a dash of Blur's weirdness, and some surprisingly heartfelt moments (looking at you, Softplay), this episode is chaos wrapped in catchy melodies. Will Andrew and Jago choose sides in these rivalries? Spoiler: expect zero objectivity. Like, subscribe, or just send Brian Harvey your best wishes—he might need them more. ### Riffs of the week #### Jago's Riff - Will Haven - Miguel (1:55) #### Andrew's Riff - Jesu - Silver (opening) ### Jago's track choices 1. Metallica - The Four Horsemen VS Megadeth - Mechanix 2. Oasis - Hey Now VS Blur - Battle 3. Take That - Could It Be Magic VS East 17 - Stay another day 4. The Beach Boys - Never learn not to love VS Charles Manson - Cease to exist ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Brian Jonestown Massacre - Not if you were the last Dandy on earth VS The Dandy Warhols - Bohemian like you 2. Tupac - Hit 'em up VS Notorious BIG - Who shot ya 3. Soft Play - Everything and Nothing VS Sleaford Mods - Jobseeker 4. Husker Du - Don't want to know if you're lonely VS The Replacements - Something to du Email us - [email protected]

**Episode Title:** _When the Drums Kick In – and Other Musical Mishaps_ **Hosts:** Andrew Culture & Dr. Sam **Summary:** Get ready for an unhinged exploration of the greatest moments when drums _really_ kick in – whether it’s a masterful fill or just chaos in a trench coat. Andrew and Dr. Sam stumble through topics like Phil Collins' shiny dome revolutionizing baldness, the orchestral carnage of WWI-themed metal gigs, and why Greg's vegan sausage rolls might double as building materials. Plus, the duo attempt to decide whether it's ever okay to stick an orange somewhere unconventional (spoiler: it’s not). Expect anecdotes about drum risers that double as death traps, the gritty charm of Oransi Pazuzu, and a heartfelt lament about the disappearance of the punk energy from bands like Pears. Oh, and they take a detour to ponder why James May memes involve pineapple. All that, and a sprinkling of hip-hop, techno minimalism, and general nonsense about pastry condoms. **Music Featured:** - _Igana_ by Yabai T-Shirts Yasan - _Kampf und Sturm_ by Canonfiber - _In the Air Tonight_ by Phil Collins (yes, _that_ bit) - _Ilmestys_ by Oransi Pazuzu - _Rather Be Dead_ by Refused - _All Balls_ by AC Alone - _Shame Face_ by François X **In This Episode:** - The joy of drum fills that slap harder than your nan when you nick her tea biscuits. - Why Andrew gets weepy over techno tracks while Dr. Sam takes the piss. - A shocking revelation about James Hetfield's secret love for Finnish noise rock. - And, of course, a discussion on vegan sausage rolls that’ll make you regret lunch. **Quote of the Episode:** _"Greg’s vegan sausage rolls are like paste in a pastry condom." – Andrew Culture_ ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - ヤバイTシャツ屋さん - Eegana #### Andrew's Riff - KANONENFIEBER - Kampf und Sturm (1:11) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Zz Top - La Grange (0.15) 2. Oranssi Pazuzu - ilmestys (4.40) 3. Pears - You're Boring (opening) 4. Aceyalone - All Balls (0.06) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Phil Collins - In the air tonight (3:15) 2. Nirvana - Scentless Apprentice (opening) 3. The Refused. - Rather be dead (0:28) 4. François X - Shamefaced (3:34) Email us - [email protected]

In this week’s audio catastrophe, Andrew is joined by Dr. Sam to discuss "best album endings." Naturally, this means chaos, sarcasm, and several tangents about guinea pig recipes, Björk's cat in pajamas, and why the Rolling Stones are basically for your mum. Musical choices span the predictable (Stone Roses) to the avant-garde (Bjork making cat noises). Plus, the duo spends more time rambling about band names, random memories of Ipswich gigs, and the existential sadness of Lemmy's apartment than actually talking about music. Classic Beat Motel. Listen in for: - ACDC's post-orgasmic groove. - Why The Stone Roses' "I Am the Resurrection" might keep the party alive. - The time Status Quo acted like divas while Motorhead just turned up. - American Football’s emo nostalgia (and Andrew’s CD shelf musings). - The art of "album-ending drama." Also featuring: - Comments on TikTok that make Mastodon fans cry. - What happens when cats in pajamas get fed up with Bjork. - Why nobody should ever try to cover ACDC. Like a chaotic mixtape of humor, niche knowledge, and unfiltered rants, this episode is exactly what you didn’t know you needed. Don’t skip the ending—you might miss a guitar amp smashing into oblivion. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Julian Mayorga - No te comas las blanquisimas mofetas (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - American Football - I'll See You When We're Both Not So Emotional (2:09) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. AC/DC - Rock and Roll Ain't Noise Pollution (0.40) 2. Kid Dynamite - Fuckuturn (0.15) 3. Bjork - Triumph of A Heart (0.50) 4. Big Business - Lonely Lyle (3.00) ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Stone Roses - I am the resurrection (7:36) 2. The Charlatans - No one, not even the rain (3:55) 3. The Rolling Stones - You can't always get what you want (0:50) 4. Gravediggaz - Rest in peace (outro) - (1:30) Email us - [email protected] https://youtu.be/0z-rhM-dcO8?si=86Xdhjw7qSl2E8Rw

In this week’s Beat Motel, Andrew and his co-host Dr. Sam tackle the odd world of _Great Albums with Terrible Songs_. Ever wondered why a near-flawless record gets ruined by a random ear-sore? Same here. Andrew dives into the trenches with Metallica, Kyuss, Radiohead, and others, pondering why bands sabotage themselves with tracks that barely qualify as filler. Dr. Sam treats us to a sociological study of the infamous “skullet” and rants about modern bands who go through music school rather than the gritty DIY route. This episode finds the two slipping into all the irreverent tangents you’d expect: a heated debate on the Doors, bizarre childhood habits, and the joys of listening to Busta Rhymes while teaching their kids about hip-hop. With witty jabs, a sprinkle of _The Office_ references, and some choice British slang, this week’s episode promises more laughs than it should. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Ana Lua Caiano - Os Meus Sapatos Tocam Nos Teus (1.05) #### Andrew's Riff - Bizarrekult - Du Lovet Meg (1:40) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Metallica - The Thing That Should Not Be (0.52) 2. Guns N Roses - Anything Goes (0.14) 3. Rancid - Life Won't Wait (0.42) 4. A Tribe Called Quest - What? (opening) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Kyuss - Yeah (entire track!) 2. Radiohead - Fitter Happier (opening) 3. The Replacements - Hootenanny (0:29) 4. The Doors - Horse Lattitudes (0:18) Email us - [email protected]

In this episode, Andrew and Dr Sam dive into the world of singing drummers—because why settle for just bashing skins when you can also belt out tunes? Expect a thorough dissection of jazz chaos theory, led by Peter Evans and his so-called “three-stooges” approach to organised sound. The duo also explore Karen Carpenter’s dual talents, Red Fang’s unadulterated riffage, and Mastodon’s... well, let’s say, questionable riff decisions. Dr Sam throws in some knowledge grenades about jazz producer legends, while Andrew recalls a traumatic encounter with Reading Festival toilets that left him missing Mastodon for a “pressing” appointment. They also ponder how Robert Wyatt of Soft Machine managed to keep it together, both rhythmically and vocally, before a window accident shifted his life forever. From awkward gig moments to a deep-dive into prog jazz and even John Grant’s soundcheck playlist, this episode has it all—except, maybe, subtlety. _Featured Tracks and Artists_: - Peter Evans and friends with some chaotic jazz noodling - The Morons with "I Want to Stab You in the Neck" (naturally) - Anderson .Paak, making soul look way too easy on the Tiny Desk - Queens of the Stone Age, with zero Grohl vocals - Yoshida Tatsuya’s wild prog jazz - A head-turning pick from Soft Machine with Robert Wyatt singing and drumming Grab your headphones (and maybe a stiff drink); it’s a wild ride through rhythm, riffs, and a solid bit of nonsense. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Peter Evans - Freaks (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - The Ruins of Beverast - Anchoress in Furs (opening) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. The Morons - Stab You in the Neck (0.10) 2. Anderson .Paak - Heart Don't Stand a Chance (from NPR tiny desk) : 3.57 3. Soft Machine - Moon in June (0.20) 4. Koenjihyakkei - Rattims Friezz (1.44) ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Carpenters - Close to you (1:15) 2. Mastodon - Blood and Thunder (opening) 3. Queens of the Stone Age - Song for the dead (0:02) 4. Velvet Underground - After Hours Email us - [email protected] Anderson .Paak - Heart Don't Stand a Chance (from NPR tiny desk) : 3.57 - https://youtu.be/ferZnZ0_rSM?feature=shared&t=237

In this episode of Beat Motel Andrew is joined by Dr Hannah. Join us as we dive into non-English music, from French hip-hop to North African future funk and Italian soap-opera jams. Along the way, we touch on archaeology, conspiracy theorists, and of course, toilet humor – because what’s a Beat Motel episode without that? We chat about: - Dr. Sam’s political philosophy doctorate (no, he can't save lives). - Sparks’ 70s awkward sexiness and North African beats that sound straight out of _The Fifth Element_. - Anime, cyberpunk, and Blade Runner-inspired 80s Japanese pop (shout-out to _Bubblegum Crisis_ fans). - Icelandic shout-singing with Bjork before she got _really_ weird. - French hip-hop legends that groove smoother than my grandmother's custard. Hold onto your milking stools (yes, we explain that), as we explore weird instrumentals, wax lyrical about vinyl obsessions, and debate which music genre has the weirdest accents. Also, if you’re into Matt Berry and his mysterious music career, we’ve got you covered. Dr. Hannah's knowledge runs deep, and we pretend to keep up. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Hannah's Riff - Sparks - Happy Hunting Ground (2:54) #### Andrew's Riff - Norma Tanega - You're dead (opening) ### Dr Hannah's track choices 1. Abdel Kader (Live à Bercy, Paris / 1998) (2:56) 2. Bubblegum Crisis - Konya wa Hurricane (2:46) 3. Maria Arnal i Marcel Bagés - Tú Que Vienes a Rondarme (1:50) 4. Mina - Se telefonando (2:20) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Sugarcubes - Birthday (Icelandic Version) (2:00) 2. MC Solaar - Nouveau Western (1:47) 3. WIZO - Quadrat im Kreis (1:30) 4. Adriano Celentano - Prisencolinensinainciusol (2:05) Hannah made a playlist of her tracks! https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1R19nDqVi8F8JplAjOalJq?si=gG518yOgSAu3O0hh4_tnfQ&pi=di55wqNKTg-f-

In this episode of "Beat Motel," Andrew Culture and _Spamuel Rage_ (because who else could conjure up such bizarre music choices?) return to the long-anticipated second half of their chaos-fueled breakdown: _Great Band, Terrible Decision_. Naturally, things get out of hand, with deep dives into bands that alienate their own fans, riffs that make zero sense, and Devon Townsend’s baffling alien coffee addiction (yes, seriously). Expect more music geekery, deranged anecdotes, and Andrew’s rants about Finnish milkmen’s stiffy-shaped bottles—because why not? They also explore what happens when you ask your partner, mid-act, “Who’s making love?”—results vary. Highlights: - ASMR misfires and a thorough misunderstanding of the purpose of _ASMR_ (what even is it?!) - Andrew Culture’s near-confession about allotment-based dogging (we're all left hanging, thank God). - How _King Prawn_ went from experimental brilliance to “WTF were they thinking?” - The horror of strapping young lads deciding to ditch metal for ‘comedy’. Spoiler: it wasn't funny. - Why asking random bus-stop strangers “Who's making love?” in Finland leads to awkward silence and not much else. It’s a wild ride as always, with random bouts of technical difficulties and Andrew Culture monologuing about _Spamuel Rage_’s suspiciously symbolic tassels. Oh, and they manage to insult at least three beloved bands (because that's how they roll). Listen for laughs, questionable musical taste, and a slight risk of learning absolutely nothing. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Johnnie Taylor - Who's Making Love (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - At the drive in - Cosmonaught (opening) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Misfits - Forbidden Zone (0.07) 2. King Prawn - Smoke Some Shit (1.00) 3. Mos Def - Rock N Roll (3.45) 4. Devin Townsend - Tall Latte (0.30) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Ride - Drive Blind (2:30) 2. Spacemen 3 - Revolution (4:10) 3. The Buzzcocks - Boredom (1:38) 4. Radiohead - Pyramid Song (2:02)

Strap yourselves in, folks, because this week Andrew Culture is joined by _David Jago_, and they’re taking a full-throttle dive into the wonderful (and sometimes catastrophic) world of bands who can’t keep a lineup straight. From Radiohead’s unbreakable five-piece to Faith No More's revolving door of members, this episode is a chaotic journey through rock and metal history. Ever wondered what happens when a 17-year-old guitarist joins a band mid-tour? Or when you replace drummers so often it feels like hiring temps at an office job? You're in the right place. David Jago starts things off with a beautiful ode to Radiohead’s _Airbag_, not just for Jonny Greenwood's guitar wizardry, but for the sneaky bass lines no one ever talks about. We drift into Faith No More territory, where Jago talks about their early rap-metal influence, reminding us that Korn may have just cribbed their sound from Mike Patton’s nightmares. But of course, Andrew has to bring us down with tales of gigs ruined by awful fans. V Festival, we’re looking at you. The theme of the week is "Bands Who Change Members for Better or Worse" – and, oh boy, does this episode deliver on that. Public Image Ltd, Korn, Fleetwood Mac, and the Sex Pistols – it’s a lineup circus, and no one is getting out alive. Andrew and David wax lyrical (and sarcastic) about drummers who can’t be replaced, guitarists who can, and band reunions that should’ve stayed dead. Whether you're here for Flea’s slapping basslines, Ginger Baker’s drum tantrums, or just to figure out how many members Suede have gone through, this episode has you covered. It's punk, it's metal, it’s Neil Finn and Stevie Vai in the same sentence, and it’s a gloriously irreverent mess. You’ll laugh, you’ll wince, you might even shed a tear for the mayonnaise-eating Korn fans. Tune in, buckle up, and get ready for a deep dive into rock and roll’s most dysfunctional families. **Show Highlights**: - The underrated magic of Colin Greenwood's bass in _Airbag_ - Faith No More and their near-decade head start on Korn - The nightmare that was V Festival 2002 (never forget, never forgive) - Suede's teenage guitar prodigy – what happened when Bernard Butler said, "me or the producer?" - Public Image Ltd and their rotating cast of rock legends, including Steve Vai and Ginger Baker (yes, really) ### Riffs of the week #### Jago's Riff - Radiohead - Airbag (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - Zero Down - Down this road (0:12) ### Jago's track choices 1. Faith No More - As the worm turns (1.11) 2. KoRn - Good God (2:20) 3. Sex Pistols - E.M.I (1:13) 4. Queen - The Hero (1:00) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Public Image Ltd - Ease (4:55) 2. Gravediggaz - Fairytalez (3:30) 3. Suede - Stay Together (6:33) 4. Wolfheart - Ancient Cold (3:15) BAND MEMBER LEADERBOARD PIL - 18 Faith No More - 13 Sex Pistols - 8 Korn - 6 Suede - 6 Queen - 5 Gravediggaz - 4

In this episode of **Beat Motel**, Andrew and the eloquently deranged **Spamuel Rage** dive deep into the delightful chaos of _Great Bands, Terrible Decisions_, and the unexpected tangents of _Multiple Songwriters in One Band_. Expect loud opinions, questionable facts, and unfiltered rants about music that might just leave you scratching your head—and, if you're like Andrew, maybe scratching something else too. The dynamic duo kicks off by discussing inappropriate use of toenails (yes, that’s a thing) and eventually stumble through topics like: - **Riff of the Week**: From obscure bands like "The Barbarians of California" to classics with questionable re-recording choices (_Johnny Cash, we're looking at you_), it’s a musical rollercoaster. - **Troll Attacks**: Apparently, people online think they’re AI-generated… which begs the question, why would anyone make this mess on purpose? - **Cannibal Corpse**: Yes, they talk about _Cannibal Corpse_ and their "delicate" approach to songwriting. Really. - **Wu-Tang Clan Skits**: Are they iconic or just disruptive nonsense? Andrew's got some strong opinions. - **Oasis**: Should Andy Bell have even been allowed near Oasis? Why does Noel Gallagher love this album so much? Discuss. Also featured: **The Doors’ worst circus tune** and **Against Me!'s snare drum debacle**, because what’s a music podcast without some hardcore nitpicking? This episode's as unfiltered as it gets—bad jokes, crude hints, and plenty of nonsense that'll make you wonder why you're still listening. But hey, that’s why it’s fun! ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - The Barbarians of California - 'Bazooka' (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - The Smile - Zero Sum (opening) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. fIREHOSE - Can't Believe (0.13) 2. Cannibal Corpse - Make them Suffer (opening) 3. Oasis - Turn Up the Sun (opening) 4. Descendents - Sour Grapes (opening) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Johnny Cash - Classic Cash: Hall of Fame Series Walk the Line (1:00) 2. Wu Tang Clan - Method Man (0:24) 3. The WASP (Texas Radio And The Big Beat) (3:30) 4. Reinventing - Axl Rose (opening) Email us - [email protected]

**Episode Summary:** In this episode of _Beat Motel_, host Andrew Culture welcomes guest co-host Ollie Pearson to chat about one of life’s crucial topics: music for hangovers. Together, they explore the perfect tracks to ease the pain, from ambient soundscapes to feel-good ska, and discuss how to nurse a hangover in style. From nostalgic memories to surprising musical connections, this episode covers all the bases in a delightful, soothing, and occasionally raucous way. **Key Highlights:** - **Riff of the Week:** Ollie kicks things off with Need New Body’s “Hot Shot,” an avant-garde tune full of cartoonish fun. Andrew follows up with the heavy, raw sound of Kulk’s “Lives For One,” a testament to the explosive music scene in East Anglia. - **Hangover Soundtrack Selections:** The hosts each choose a series of tracks to create the ultimate hangover recovery playlist, diving into the relaxing vibes of AIX Em KLEMM, the deep ambiance of Kiasmos, the glitchy experimentalism of Oren Ambarchi, and even the big, bold ska beats of The Big. - **Finding Musical Comfort:** Andrew and Ollie share their personal hangover music philosophies, from soothing, ambient tones that unravel gently like a head massage, to upbeat ska rhythms that remind you everything's going to be okay. - **Music Discovery Journeys:** The duo reminisce about discovering new bands in the pre-streaming era, the joy of crate-digging, and finding inspiration from bands like Stars of the Lid, Godflesh, and even The Velvet Underground. - **Nostalgic & Experimental Tunes:** From tracks that recall childhood Saturdays to the overlooked brilliance of The Verve’s early shoegaze, this episode takes listeners on a musical journey filled with surprises and thoughtful insights. - **Bass, Beats, and Sound Baths:** Bass is the theme of the day, with Andrew and Ollie exploring how deep bass notes bring depth to ambient music, how certain songs are like an “auditory medicine,” and how even modular synths can help you through a morning of malaise. **Standout Tracks Featured:** - **Need New Body – “Hot Shot”**: Avant-garde chaos that captures the mayhem of a pre-hangover night out. - **Kulk – “Lives For One”**: Heavy, fuzzy riffs from East Anglia’s thriving music scene. - **AIX Em KLEMM – “The Luxury of Dirt”**: A soothing ambient piece for a gentle start to the day. - **Oren Ambarchi – “Remedios the Beautiful”**: Guitar-based glitch that unravels with soft, intricate detail. - **The Big – “Think Bigger”**: Ska beats to brighten up the morning after. - **Microstoria – “Endless Summer”**: Computer-driven soundscapes with warm, comforting bass lines. - **The Verve – “The Sun, The Sea”**: The shoegaze roots of a band that later became huge pop stars. - **Elaine Radigue – “Trilogie de la Mort”**: A meditative three-hour drone for deep immersion. - **The Velvet Underground – “After Hours”**: The perfect wind-down track for a restful end to a long day. **Who Should Listen?** If you’ve ever woken up feeling worse for wear and in need of some musical therapy, this episode is for you. Andrew and Ollie curate the ultimate hangover playlist for those who need to soothe, distract, and revive their spirits with a carefully chosen soundtrack. Expect eclectic recommendations, music history, and lots of laughs. ### Riffs of the week #### Oli's Riff - Need new body - Hot Shot (1:10) #### Andrew's Riff - Kulk - Lives for one (opening) ### Oli's track choices 1. Aix Em Klemm - Luxury of dirt (opening) 2. Oren Ambarchi - Remedios the Beauty (0:15) 3. Microstoria - Endless Summer (opening) 4. Éliane Radigue - Kilasha (9:20) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Kiasmos - Looped (opening) 2. The Big - Think Bigger (1:37) 3. Verve - The Sun, The Sea (2:37) 4. The Velvet Underground - After Hours (Opening) Email us - [email protected]