What is Truth?: Bridging the Gap Between What You Feel and What is Real

The conversation explores the dynamics of influence and leadership, questioning the roles of followers and leaders in shaping opinions and decisions. It emphasizes the importance of recognizing when we are being influenced and the responsibilities that come with both leading and following.TakeawaysInfluence shapes our decisionsLeadership requires mutual recognitionChapters00:00 The Nature of Influence02:54 Leadership vs. Followership05:44 The Dynamics of Trust and Authority11:57 Social Pressure and Conformity18:12 The Responsibility of Influence24:09 Navigating Leadership and FollowershipMusic Artist: BonsayeSong: Revolucion, Pt. IIReferencesAsch, S. E. (1955). Opinions and social pressure. Scientific American, 193(5), 31-35. https://doi.org/10.1038/scientificamerican1155-31, https://www.jstor.org/stable/24943779 Cialdini, R. B., & Goldstein, N. J. (2004). Social influence: Compliance and conformity. Annual Review of Psychology, 55, 591-621. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev.psych.55.090902.142015 DeRue, D. S., & Ashford, S. J. (2010). Who will lead and who will follow? A social process of leadership identity construction in organizations. Academy of Management Review, 35(4), 627-647. https://doi.org/10.5465/amr.35.4.zok627 Kouzes, J. M., & Posner, B. Z. (2010). The Truth About Leadership: The no-fads, heart-of-the-matter facts you need to know. Jossey-Bass.Spears, R. (2021). Social influence and group identity. Annual Review of Psychology, 72, 367-390. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-070620-111818 Uhl-Bien, M., Riggio, R. E., Lowe, K. B., & Carsten, M. K. (2014). Followership theory: A review and research agenda. *The Leadership Quarterly, 25*(1), 83–104. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.leaqua.2013.11.007

The conversation delves into the complex nature of responsibility, exploring its definition, impact of childhood trauma, unconscious addiction, compassion, ownership, major life transitions, and limited awareness of identity and values. The conversation delves into the themes of living a life of purpose and impact, recognizing constraints and surrendering agency, responsibility and emotional mastery, understanding healthy responsibility, commitment to personal transformation, and the spectrum of responsibility. The discussion emphasizes the importance of recognizing the impact of small decisions, acknowledging constraints without surrendering agency, and understanding the role of emotions in taking responsibility.TakeawaysResponsibility as a response vs. reactingThe impact of childhood trauma on responsibility Living a life of purpose and impactRecognizing constraints without surrendering agencyChapters00:00 Exploring Responsibility02:07 Defining Responsibility, Accountability, Agency, and Circumstances05:16 The Ability to Respond vs. Reacting08:09 Responsibility as Empowerment vs. Pressure09:09 The Impact of Childhood Trauma on Responsibility18:08 Unconscious Addiction and Trauma Response23:30 Compassion, Ownership, and Major Life Transitions28:04 Identity, Values, and Limited Awareness30:53 Living a Life of Purpose and Impact32:14 Recognizing Constraints and Surrendering Agency33:49 Responsibility and Emotional Mastery45:27 Understanding Healthy Responsibility51:31 Commitment to Personal Transformation56:17 The Spectrum of ResponsibilityGuest: Endre Hoffmannhttps://www.doctorofselfworth.com/Music: Bonsaye - DescartesReferencesAmes, D. R., Ochsner, K. N., & Reeck, C. (2016). The social regulation of emotion: An integrative, cross-disciplinary model. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 20(1), 47–63. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2015.09.003  De Bellis, M. D., & Zisk, A. (2014). The biological effects of childhood trauma. Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Clinics of North America, 23(2), 185–222. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chc.2014.01.002  Ghahremani, L., Karimi, M., Kaveh, M. H., Nazari, M., & Zare, E. (2025, January 1). The correlation between resilience, self-control, self-regulation, and decision-making style and aggressive behavior in adolescents: An analysis using structural equation modeling. International Journal of School Health. https://intjsh.sums.ac.ir/article_50422.html  Pickard, H. (2017). Responsibility without blame for addiction. Neuroethics, 10(1), 169–180. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12152-016-9295-2  Van der Kolk, B. A. (2015). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma.

The podcast explores the fascinating question of why people remember the same moment differently. It delves into the nature of memory as a reconstruction of the past, influenced by attention, emotion, and identity. It emphasizes the importance of humility and curiosity in understanding memory and truth. Exploring the question: Why do people remember the same moment differently?TakeawaysMemory is a reconstruction, not a replayOur attention shapes memory.Emotion changes what we remember.We remember through the lens of who we are.Chapters00:00 The Nature of Memory02:29 Memory as Reconstruction11:08 Attention and Memory15:05 Emotion and Memory19:40 Identity and MemoryArtist: BonsayeSong: CollideReferencesAndrews, B., & Brewin, C. R. (2016). Creating memories for false autobiographical events in childhood: A systematic review. Applied Cognitive Psychology, 31(1), 2–23. https://doi.org/10.1002/acp.3220 Chun, M. M., Kuhl, B. A., & Long, N. M. (2018). Memory and attention. Stevens’ Handbook of Experimental Psychology and Cognitive Neuroscience, 1–37. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781119170174.epcn109Conway, M. A., Justice, L. V., & D’Argembeau, A. (2019). The self-memory system revisited. The organization and structure of autobiographical memory, 28-51. Guerin, S. A., Schacter, D. L., & St. Jacques, P. L. (2011). Memory distortion: An adaptive perspective. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 15(10), 467–474. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2011.08.004 Gómez, R. L., Nadel, L., & Simon, K. C. (2020). Parameters of memory reconsolidation: Learning mode influences likelihood of memory modification. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience, 14. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnbeh.2020.00120 Kark, S. M., & Kensinger, E. A. (2018). Emotion and memory. Stevens’ Handbook of Experimental Psychology and Cognitive Neuroscience, 1–26. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781119170174.epcn101

The conversation delves into the complexity of identity, exploring the interplay of given, discovered, constructed, and chosen elements. It also examines the role of responsibility and agency in shaping one's identity, as well as the influence of external forces, relationships, and community. The discussion further explores the potential for personal transformation, surprising self-discoveries, and the difference between who we are and who we think we are. The conversation delves into the dynamic nature of identity, emphasizing the importance of acceptance before change and the lifelong pursuit of understanding and shaping one's identity. It explores the balance between self-presentation and self-discovery, the significance of emotional work, and the distinction between uncovering and becoming. The chapters cover a range of topics, from the nature of identity to the pursuit of authenticity and the distinction between identity and image.TakeawaysIdentity is a complex interplay of given, discovered, constructed, and chosen elements.Our ability to respond instead of react is a key aspect of responsibility and agency. Identity is a dynamic and evolving conceptAcceptance precedes changeThe pursuit of identity is a lifelong journeyGuest: Jason Sandmannhttps://jasonsandmann.substack.com/ReferencesCheek, N. N., & Cheek, J. M. (2018). Aspects of identity: From the inner-outer metaphor to a tetrapartite model of the self. Self and Identity, 17(4), 467–482. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/15298868.2017.1412347Côté, J. E. (2018). The enduring usefulness of Erikson's concept of identity. Identity: An International Journal of Theory and Research, 18(4), 251–264. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15283488.2018.1524328 Gimmel, D. Quote by Japanese Proverb. Goodreads. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/12270396-do-not-speak-bad-of-yourself-for-the-warrior-within-hearsMcLean, K. C., Syed, M., Pasupathi, M., Adler, J. M., Dunlop, W. L., Drustrup, D., et al. (2020). The empirical structure of narrative identity: The initial Big Three. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 119(4), 920–944. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30998044/Vignoles, V. L., Jaser, Z., Taylor, F., & Ntontis, E. (2021). Harnessing shared identities to mobilize resilient responses to collective threat. Political Psychology, 42(S1), 37–57. Supports the importance of social relationships and group belonging in identity formation. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8013210/

The episode explores the relationship between feelings and truth, highlighting the gap between feelings and reality, the distinction between feelings and truth, the role of emotional intelligence in decision making, the nature of feelings as recognition and intuition, and the unreliability of feelings as a standalone standard for truth.TakeawaysFeelings as DataEmotional IntelligenceChapters00:00 The Gap Between Feelings and Reality06:43 Emotional Intelligence and Decision Making12:40 The Unreliability of FeelingsReferencesBradberry, T., & Greaves, J. (2009). Emotional Intelligence 2.0. TalentSmart.Goodreads. (n.d.). A quote by Warren Buffett. Goodreads. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/8956691-what-the-human-being-is-best-at-doing-is-interpreting Greenaway, K. H., Kalokerinos, E. K., & Williams, L. A. (2018). Context is everything (in emotion research). Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 12(6), e12393. https://compass.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/spc3.12393)KassamK., Lerner, J. S., Kanesan, P., & Fauzan, N. (2019). MODELS OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE: A REVIEW. E-BANGI, Suppl.Special Issue 7, 16, 1-9. https://colby.idm.oclc.org/login?url=https://www.proquest.com/scholarly-journals/models-emotional-intelligence-review/docview/2396318735/se-2 Li, Y., & Valdesolo, P. (2015). Emotion and decision making. Annual Review of Psychology, 66(1), 799–823. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-010213-115043 Pham, M. T. (2004). The logic of feeling. Journal of Consumer Psychology, 14(4), 360–369. https://doi.org/10.1207/s15327663jcp1404_5 Solomon, R. C. (2007). True to our feelings: What our emotions are really telling us. Oxford University Press. https://tinyurl.com/5n8vh8neStephen, L. (2024, July 17). The space between stimulus and response - ignite. IGNITE Peak Performance. https://ignitepeakperformance.com/general/the-space-between-stimulus-and-response/

The conversation delves into the impact of lenses on perception, interpretation, and relationships. It explores the challenges of lens awareness and the need for understanding the impact of lenses on reality. The discussion also highlights the process of examining and shifting lenses, as well as the role of lenses in self-protection and relational misunderstandings.TakeawaysLens shapes realityUnderstanding the impact of lensesChallenges of lens awarenessChapters00:00 Examining Lenses: Origin and MeaningGuest: Christina Wonghttps://www.yourjourneybacktoself.com/ReferencesMair, N. (2022, February 6). The Psychological Lens. Medium. https://medium.com/@nickmair3/the-psychological-lens-5313b1bc8f18  Mifsud, R., & Sammut, G. (2023). Worldviews and the role of social values that underlie them. PLOS ONE, 18(7). https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0288451  Galinsky, A. S., Ku, G. D., & Wang, C. (2010). Perception through a perspective-taking lens: Differential effects on judgment and behavior. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 46(5), 792–798. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2010.04.001  Byom, L. J., & Mutlu, B. (2013). Theory of mind: Mechanisms, methods, and New Directions. Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, 7. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnhum.2013.00413 Lin, D. Y., Pronin, E., & Ross, L. (2002). The bias blind spot: Perceptions of bias in self versus others. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 28(3), 369–381. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167202286008 Cherry, K. (2026, January 8). Actor-Observer Bias in Social Psychology. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-actor-observer-bias-2794813?utm_source=chatgpt.com 

The episode explores the concept of coexistence and the challenges of holding multiple truths in the same space. It delves into the nature of truth, the challenge of coexistence, and the distinctions between truth as experience and truth as authority. It also examines the impact of truth on experience, interpretation, and meaning, highlighting the complexities of navigating multiple truths in various contexts.TakeawaysCoexistence requires empathy, restraint, and willingness to remain engagedTruth as experience differs from truth as authorityReferencesAlles, T. (2022). Truth and Perspectives. Interdisciplinary Journal for Religion and Transformation in Contemporary Society, 8(1), 13–33. https://doi.org/10.30965/23642807-bja10040 Belmir, I., Dadda, S., & Nejjari, A. (2025). From interculturality to coexistence: Towards a new societal paradigm. Journal of Education, Society and Behavioural Science, 38(4), 114–120. https://doi.org/10.9734/jesbs/2025/v38i41405  Capps, J. (2023, May 22). The Pragmatic Theory of Truth. Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy. https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/truth-pragmatic/  Hautamaki, A. (2022, February 16). Disagreement, points of view, and truth-relativism - acta analytica. SpringerLink. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12136-021-00504-x Johnson, D. (2020). Deep disagreement, hinge commitments, and intellectual humility. Episteme, 19(3), 353–372. https://doi.org/10.1017/epi.2020.31 Pritchard, D. (2018, November 23). Intellectual humility and the epistemology of disagreement - synthese. SpringerLink. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11229-018-02024-5 Ramesh, M. (2020, September 24). Never settle: The inspiring story of an old watch and self-worth!. Medium. https://mythiliramesh.medium.com/never-settle-the-inspiring-story-of-an-old-watch-and-self-worth-102a43861922 Smeekes, A., Velthuis, E., & Verkuyten, M. (2021, June 16). The different faces of social tolerance: Conceptualizing and measuring respect and coexistence tolerance - social indicators research. SpringerLink. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11205-021-02724-5

The podcast explores the nature of truth and the importance of understanding different perspectives. It emphasizes the need to move beyond debate and affirmation to genuinely understand how people arrive at their beliefs. Each episode begins with a question, definitions upfront, and an open dialogue focused on the question.TakeawaysUnderstanding different perspectivesImportance of truth