Boymode and Girlmode

Grab your Tillyvision goggles, it's time for more "I Saw the TV Glow" trans allegory goodness! This week we talk losing access to our femininity, seeking out community, and the horrible things society tells us about ourselves. Lilah Sturges returns to discuss Hamlet and Chekhov's Egg! LILAH STURGES Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com Insta: @lilahksturges TEXT VERSION https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/17/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-3/ FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Hair, Hair 2, The Signs Were Always There (that we're trans), Misgendering and Passing, Internalized Transphobia, Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1), Sexuality is Not Gender REFERENCE MATERIAL Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

"I Saw the TV Glow" in Tillyvision continues! This week we get our first true exploration of our own transness, and with it comes learning about transphobia in all its forms. Comic writer Lilah Sturges returns to discuss viscous liquids! Everybody do a little dance. LILAH STURGES Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com Insta: @lilahksturges TEXT VERSION https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/10/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-2/ FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Photos and Reflections, The False Dichotomy, Gendered Childhoods, The Intentional Trans Allegory of Barbie, Internalized Transphobia, A Trans Re-wedding, The 2022 US Trans Survey REFERENCE MATERIAL Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C The Out to Get You podcast, episode 2 - Sleepaway Camp with Lilah Sturges - https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/02-sleepaway-camp-1983-with-lilah-sturges/id1692353804?i=1000617723984 Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

Tillyvision returns to discuss the remarkable, beautiful, devastating "I Saw the TV Glow!" In this episode we talk context, establish the visual language of the film, and then dive right into examining by timestamps! If you haven't seen the movie yet definitely watch it first, but be prepared... it's heavy stuff. Comic writer Lilah Sturges joins us to discuss feeling jaded and psychic damage! There may also be Pokemon things. LILAH STURGES Bluesky: @lilahsturges.com Insta: @lilahksturges TEXT VERSION https://www.tillystranstuesdays.com/2024/09/03/the-intentional-trans-allegory-of-i-saw-the-tv-glow-part-1/ FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) The Intentional Trans Allegory of Barbie, Searching for Meaning (when you're trans and don't know it) REFERENCE MATERIAL Begin Transmission: The Trans Allegories of The Matrix - https://www.amazon.com/Begin-Transmission-trans-allegories-Matrix-ebook/dp/B0C2MPVH9C Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

It's still trans history month! And so this week we're going to look at a bunch of examples of trans people in history, including some times where we've very intentionally been erased. PhD student in history (sexual diversity studies) Nico Mara-McKay returns to discuss the cis agenda and coming out as left-handed! I'm gonna mangle some French! (apologies in advance) NICO MARA-MCKAY Bluesky: @plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ephemeralrecord Website: https://www.nicomaramckay.com FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Trans History 1 (how and why we name trans people in history), Gender Dysphoria, Trans Rage 2: Cis Apathy, Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1) REFERENCE MATERIAL Suicidality Among Transgender Youth: Elucidating the Role of Interpersonal Risk Factors - https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32345113/ The Forgotten History of the World's First Trans Clinic - https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-forgotten-history-of-the-worlds-first-trans-clinic/ Why It Took Decades for LGBTQ Stories to Be Included in Holocaust History - https://time.com/5953047/lgbtq-holocaust-stories/ The Pink Triangle - https://www.thepinktriangle.com/history/symbol.html New Research Reveals How the Nazis Targeted Transgender People - https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/new-research-reveals-how-the-nazis-targeted-transgender-people-180982931/ Twitter thread on the willful hiding of trans people in history by @lisaquestions - https://x.com/lisaquestions/status/1525187671936512000 How This 18th Century French Spy Came Out As Trans - https://www.them.us/story/chevalier-d-eon-trans-woman Twitter post on the willful denying of d'Eon's transness by @AlinaBoyden - https://x.com/AlinaBoyden/status/1479925768272629760 Marsha “Pay it no Mind” Johnson - https://www.outhistory.org/exhibits/show/tgi-bios/marsha-p-johnson Twitter thread on the transness of Lou Alcott by @peytonology - https://x.com/peytonology/status/1516612189687324673 Twitter thread on trans brothers Mark and David Ferrow by @EliErlick - https://x.com/EliErlick/status/1520805459166482432 Who is the Rev. Dr. Pauli Murray? - https://www.paulimurraycenter.com/who-is-pauli Lucy Hicks Anderson, a Black Trans Pioneer - https://www.aclu-ms.org/en/news/highlight-lucy-hicks-anderson-black-trans-pioneer Roberta Cowell - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roberta_Cowell Wendy Carlos, the electronic music pioneer who happens to be transgender - https://www.washingtonpost.com/outlook/wendy-carlos-the-electronic-music-pioneer-who-happens-to-be-transgender/2020/10/22/fa4f511e-d5ac-11ea-930e-d88518c57dcc_story.html The Trans Middle Ages: Incorporating Transgender and Intersex Studies into the History of Medieval Sexuality - https://academic.oup.com/ehr/article/138/593/933/7529096 Don’t Hurt Girls When You Dance (Or Any Other Time) (Kurt Cobain) - https://unwinnable.com/2024/04/05/dont-hurt-girls-when-you-dance-or-any-other-time-kurt-cobain-nirvana/ Visit Casa Susanna, a secret house of trans women in the 1960s - https://www.advocate.com/transgender/casa-susanna#rebelltitem1 Trailblazing Transgender Doctor Saved Countless Lives - https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/trailblazing-transgender-doctor-saved-countless-lives/ Trans People Have Existed For Thousands Of Years And Other Things You Should Know About Trans People - https://www.buzzfeed.com/shawnstensberg/a-brief-history-of-being-trans The Forgotten Trans History of the Wild West - https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/trans-history-wild-west Museum reclassifies Roman emperor as trans woman - https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-67484645 UK museum reclassifies Roman emperor as transgender - https://www.theartnewspaper.com/2023/11/21/uk-museum-reclassifies-roman-emperor-as-transgender BlueSky thread on Anastasios, a trans man monk affirmed in death, by @plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com‬ - https://bsky.app/profile/plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com/post/3kt3zsmd6aw26 The Scythian Enarei Transgender Priestesses | Ancient Transgender History | We Have Always Existed - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABpT6e-KlOo Inanna: the ancient Sumerian goddess of love, sensuality, fertility, procreation, and war - https://www.worldhistory.org/Inanna/ Inanna/Ishtar, followed by those who flaunt the gender binary, who transformed men into women - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inanna Twitter thread on transgender longing by medieval French philosopher Kalonymus ben Kalonymus, by @TheRaDR - https://x.com/TheRaDR/status/987171135535149056 Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

It's trans history month! Are you fired up to learn about trans people in history? Good, because we need that fire to push back against prevailing thought in a field that doesn't know how to spot us, doesn't want to spot us, refuses to name us, and actively worked to hide our existence. So let's dive right in to talking about how we name trans people in history, and why it's absolutely vital for us to do so to combat cissexism. PhD student in history (sexual diversity studies) Nico Mara-McKay joins us to discuss cultural shifts and how transitioning is a fraught concept! Also Dirtbag Henry makes his first appearance on the pod. We've got manifestos for everyone! NICO MARA-MCKAY Bluesky: @plutopsyche.nicomaramckay.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ephemeralrecord Website: https://www.nicomaramckay.com FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Transmedicalism (and WPATH version 1) REFERENCE MATERIAL History teacher Loukas Christodoulou - https://mastodon.nu/@Loukas Historian Sandra Bosley - https://reliconthelethe.blogspot.com Others of My Kind: Transatlantic Transgender Histories - Historicizing Transgender Terminology - https://ucp.manifoldapp.org/read/others-of-my-kind/section/9716e76c-7c86-4619-b2e4-9be7c9ff1cb0#_idParaDest-12 What Is Trans History? - https://www.historians.org/perspectives-article/what-is-trans-history-from-activist-and-academic-roots-a-field-takes-shape-may-2018/ Trans Historical: Gender Plurality before the Modern - https://www.amazon.com/Trans-Historical-Gender-Plurality-before/dp/1501759086 Before We Were Trans: A New History of Gender - https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/dr-kit-heyam-ph-d/before-we-were-trans/9781541603080/ Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

Hi cis friends! Why do you stare at us? I mean, I think I know why, and so do you. And you have to know how rude it is. So then why do you do it anyway? Let's talk about just how often it happens, the ludicrous lengths you will go to in order to keep staring at us, and how incredibly insulting it is when we already do SO much just to get you to leave us alone. Geeky ttrpg-er Kristine Chester returns to discuss inspiring each other and waiting for the Vulcans. She's making history and setting precedents! And hey... if your words are bad, change them. KRISTINE CHESTER Twitter: @12thKnight FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) The Trans Allegory of Barbie, The Trans Allegory of Silo s1, Interview with Wrath Goddess Sing author Maya Deane, Privilege (time and money), The Only Trans Person You Know, Trans Intersectionality, The 2022 US Trans Survey early insights, Trans Microaggressions, Misgendering and Passing, What Real Cis Acceptance Looks Like, Cis Privilege, Bad Representation, Good Representation, TERFs, Trans Politics, Body Hair, The False Dichotomy, Gendered Clothes and Trans People, Trans Kids and the Intake Exam, Trans Sports, Trans Representation in Media 2022 and 2023, Trans Roles and Stories, Trans Rights, Trans Rights 2, Trans Voices 1-3, Legal Name and Gender Marker Change, Tucking and Binding, Boymode and Girlmode, Proactive Allyship (be an accomplice), Trans Freedom (and underwear) Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

So now you know that there are little bonuses that come with transition that we couldn't have anticipated, but did you know even more comes along with it? Sometimes there are changes to yourself and the way you exist in the world that you also could have never anticipated. And where those can lead you is sometimes surprising. Geeky ttrpg-er Kristine Chester joins us to discuss being present in your life and how ttrpgs really are evil! (no they're not) (this episode includes my Only At Comic-con wild experience from SDCC 2023!) KRISTINE CHESTER Twitter: @12thKnight FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Body Hair, Gender Euphoria, Gender Dysphoria, Finding Our Trans Style, Hair, Hair 2, Four Year Retrospective, Unexpected Bonuses of Transition, Confidence 2: Into the Unknown (A Whole New World, What is Happening), Pandemic Transition, Photos and Reflections, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, A Trans Re-wedding Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

There's a whole lot that every trans and nonbinary person hopes to get out of transition, but sometimes you also get small, wonderful little bits of joy you never could have anticipated. And they're all due to the world transition opens up to you. Photographer, filmmaker, and writer Rachel Kendra returns to discuss film scores, Robotech, and not hating the person in the mirror. Am I for real? Thanks so much, Reagan! RACHEL KENDRA Twitter: @rachelxkendra Threads: @rachelxkendra Insta: @rachelxkendra Bluesky: @rachelxkendra Website: rachelkendra.com FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Heavily Gendered Clothes and Trans People, Gender Euphoria, Gender Dysphoria, A Trans Re-wedding, Gendered Childhoods, Implicit Queerphobia, Internalized Transphobia Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

I've been out publicly as trans for four years, and on hormone replacement therapy for just as long! So let's dive in to my annual check-in and see what new developments (ahem) have occurred! We're going to cover body hair, photos, exercise, confidence, voice, clothes, getting married all over again, and multiple new body changes! Photographer, filmmaker, and writer Rachel Kendra joins us to discuss the dying film industry and how it's so L.A. to first meet on a podcast! Let's just see what happens. For fun! RACHEL KENDRA Twitter: @rachelxkendra Threads: @rachelxkendra Insta: @rachelxkendra Bluesky: @rachelxkendra Website: rachelkendra.com FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) One, Two, and Three Year Retrospectives, Transition Setbacks, 2022 US Trans Survey Report, Pandemic Transition, Body Hair, Photos and Reflections, Photos 2: The Selfie Apocalypse, Performative Allyship, Body Hacking, Hair, Hair 2, Bodily Autonomy (and my tattoo), Confidence, Confidence 2 (aka Into the Unknown aka What is Happening aka A Whole New World), A Trans Re-wedding, Trans Voices 1-3, Anecdotal Trans Healthcare, Finding Our Trans Style Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions

Do you know what boymoding and girlmoding are? Do you know why trans and nonbinary people would do it, especially when the chances are high that we REALLY don't want to? Guess what you're gonna learn all about this week? Let's talk about what it is, why we do it, and why it absolutely SUCKS for many of us. Priest, playwright, and theologian Shannon TL Kearns returns to discuss connecting with our bodies and trusting yourself. Feel your feelings! SHANNON TL KEARNS Twitter: @shannontlkearns Facebook: @shannontlkearns Insta: @shannontlkearns Tiktok: @shannontlkearns Website: shannontlkearns.com In the Margins: A Transgender Man’s Journey with Scripture - https://www.amazon.com/dp/0802879489 FURTHER READING (topics discussed with essays available at http://TillysTransTuesdays.com) Heavily Gendered Clothes and Trans People, A Pandemic Transition, Confidence, A Trans Re-wedding, Gender Dysphoria, Legal Name and Gender Marker Changes, 2022 US Trans Survey Early Insights Special thanks to Daisy and Jane for the use of "Sorry Not Sorry" as our show's theme music. Please stop by and show your support at daisyandjane.bandcamp.com and soundcloud.com/daisyandjane --Please leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts/iTunes!-- Website: pendantaudio.com Twitter: @pendantweb Facebook: facebook.com/pendantaudio Tumblr: pendantaudio.tumblr.com YouTube: youtube.com/pendantproductions