The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

137 | What's My Enneagram?

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In part 2 of my Personality Test Adventures I’m heading down the path of the Enneagram, the darling of Christian Instagram.



  • DISCLAIMER

Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.



  • NEWSLETTER

https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d



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https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints




  • FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS

Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo

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Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/

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Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com



  • STUFF I MENTIONED

DISC Episode - https://uncuratedlife.libsyn.com/133-my-first-personality-test-disc

About the enneagram - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/how-the-enneagram-system-works

Test - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/rheti





Inquiries - [email protected]

 

TRANSCRIPTION

Well, hi there friends. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where I take personality tests and tell you all about them for your amusement. That's not the only thing we do here, but that is a series that I started relatively recently. So this is the second episode. The first episode was the D I S C assessment.

 

And I will link that in the show notes, if you would like to check it out and you haven't already, that was episode 1 33, but today we are going to be taking a look at the Darlene of Christian Instagram, the Enneagram test. Now here's the thing with personality tests. I'm generally skeptical about them, but enough people asked me to take them.

 

That I decided to just do this for the amusement of the internet. So I promise I go into these tests with an open mind and I am not being snarky when I answered the questions and actually take the test. Even if I'm snarky. When I talk about the test, when I take it, I'm taking it seriously. You may not believe me, but I swear I am now before we get into the actual test, give me a moment to mention that my latest series series two of my fuckery flowers, which are my flagship art print.

 

They're a beautiful flowers in botanicals. Mixed media paintings that I create prints out of, and they're realistic, but hidden within them as a naughty word. Fucking love them. I have a new series of 12 launching this coming Thursday, the 25th, the link is in the show notes and the shop is only going to be open until December 10th and then I'm going to shut it down for the holidays.

 

So. Shipping does not bite us in the ass. So just be sure to check it out when you're able, there will be some bundles that will be limited edition showing up just for black Friday weekend, blah, blah, blah. Check it out. Let's get to the test. So what is the Enneagram? So from the website, Truity they say.

 

The Enneagram is a system of personality typing that describes patterns in how people interpret the world and manage their emotions. The Enneagram describes nine personality types and maps. Each of these out on a nine pointed diagram, which helps to illustrate how. Relate to one another. The Enneagram is mostly used for personal self knowledge and personality development, offering a powerful tool for better understanding your core motivations and applying that knowledge to all areas of your life, including conflict resolution, team dynamics, leadership, and emotional intelligence, because it identifies opportunities for development for each individual type.

 

It has become widely used in. Such as counseling psychotherapy, business development, parenting, and education and quote. So like the quote said there are nine types and I pulled these from the Enneagram institute.com note that they're highlights. They're not the full spectrum of each type. Just to give you an idea of each type.

 

So type one is. A is principled purposeful, self controlled and a perfectionist type two is generous. Demonstrative people-pleasing and possessive type three is adaptable, excelling, driven, an image conscious type fours, expressive, dramatic self-absorbed and temperamental type five is perceptive innovative, secretive, and isolated.

 

Type six is engaging responsible, anxious, and suspicious type seven is spontaneous, versatile acquisitive and scattered type eight is self-confident decisive, willful and confrontational type nine is receptive, reassuring, complacent, and resigned. So it's nine types. It's a whole bunch of information. If you want to read more, like I said, links will all be in the show notes.

 

Now I said at the beginning, the Darlene of Christian Instagram now, well, the Enneagram is not rooted in Christianity in recent years. It has really taken root in a lot of the communities. The first time I attempted to take this test a couple of years ago, the free test I found was explicitly Christian.

 

And I note right the fuck out of there because I'm not Christian. And. A ton of the books I've found on different Enneagram types are written from a Christian perspective, like devotionals for type threes or how to be a type three. And then they don't say that they're Christian, but then you look at them and they're pretty fucking Christian.

 

It's not my jam dude. And so I'm not like in. The test I did find is science-based allegedly, what does it say? Science-based or scientifically validated force choice, personality test. Uh, it didn't seem to be Christian. When I looked at it, it costs $12. And according to the website takes about 40 minutes to complete.

 

Now there are plenty of free tests out there. You just need to be careful if you're not somebody who wants to take one from a Christian perspective to just keep an eye out for that. And on top of that, a lot of them will give you information, but you gotta like give them your email to get the rest of it and blah, blah, blah.

 

So just that, that's the point. The one I am taking is the. Test the Riso Hudson Enneagram type indicator routine version 2.5. And that is linked in the description. So. It says here that it has been independently scientifically validated rather than just indicating your basic type. It produces a full personality profile across all nine types, providing you a unique portrait relative indicating your relative strengths and weaknesses of the nine types within your overall personnel.

 

All right. So that's the one I'm taking. I will pause you here and go take it. If you want to take one of the tests and do it with me, then post, we can post about it on Instagram stories, blah, blah, blah. But I'll be back. I'll be back. All right. So I am done with the test. It went pretty quickly for me. I wound up doing it about 20, 25 minutes, but I tend to read really quickly and I didn't hesitate.

 

There were a couple where I think I read the question wrong. So I went back and was right about that and then answered it. So according to my results, my highest Enneagram type is two with seven being very close second. And then my lowest was type eight. So. I looked at this and two is the helper.

 

Generally twos are caring, empathetic, warm, thoughtful, appreciative, generous, other oriented, tactile affectionate, well, intention and demonstrative. They get into conflict by being people pleasing, flattering, ingratiating, clingy, worried, possessive insincere, seductive self-important, and self deceptive. And at their best twos are encouraging, loving self nurturing.

 

Constant joyous, humble, forgiving, gracious, and compassionate. So I see aspects of myself in this one, but I think that the second one, which is very close to the first. Is a little bit more me because I, one of the things I read about the Enneagram is that your original personality type is the way you like.

 

It's something that's constant throughout your life. And I feel like a lot of the aspects of the two are things that I have developed through like working on myself, but seven, the enthusiastic, I read that one and I was like, Hmm. So sevens are excitable spontaneous, curious, optimistic, eager, outgoing, future oriented, adventurous variety, seeking quick and talkative.

 

They get into conflicts by being scattered, distracted, restless, impatient thrill-seeking escapist, overextended, irresponsible, demanding, and excessive. And at their best, they are appreciative bountiful, thoughtful, accomplished, versatile, receptive, grateful content, quiet and passionate. Type seven exemplifies the desire for freedom and variety and for exploring the many rich experiences that life offers they're spontaneous and upbeat.

 

They find life exhilarating that the kind of people who and see like this also in some ways like there's aspects of this that are very much me, but there are aspects that I'm not adventurous. And I don't feel my social calendar like.

 

So there is that. Now one of the things I wanted to look at to see if maybe I could figure out which one of these I was, and I could see the, now I'm going to the third one, which was five, generally fives are focused, observant, curious, insightful expert studious. Complex perceptive, whimsical, profound unsentimental ex no, this isn't me as much either.

 

I don't know you guys. I need to sit down and talk to Jesse about this and be like, which one it ma, but I feel like, Ooh, sorry about the odd by goodness, but I feel like seven. So I'm going to go to the personality dynamics and variations to see if I can kind of. Kinda hammer this out under stress. Seven goes to average one sevens value their spontaneity and tend to follow their impulses for better or for worse.

 

As a result, they can become scattered in their attention and energy leaping from one idea to the next, from one activity to another. While this can be exciting. It often leaves seven's frustrated with themselves because they feel like they are not accomplishing as much as they would like to. At such times they begin to behave like average ones pulling in the reins on themselves and trying to get more organized and self controlled.

 

But because they are trying to impose order and control on themselves, they begin to feel trapped and restricted. This just makes them more frustrated, impatient, and irritable. They may, for instance, become critical of their own creativity. Creative. Before they have had a chance to develop them. Similarly, they cannot avoid feeling disappointment with people and aspects of their environment.

 

Nothing meets their expectations and they can become harsh and perfectionistic be critical with themselves. And with others, see that that is fucking like razor sharp. Security seven goes to an average five sevens often feel it is their duty to entertain others and keep their environment positive and exciting over time.

 

This can be exhausting even for sevens, when they are tired of being on for everyone, they may choose to withdraw even from their intimates and seek seclusion. And noninterference, this can come as a shock to others. You've been out having fun with everyone else. Why are you so quiet and unavailable? They no longer want to put out energy for anyone else and can become almost obsessively focused and preoccupied.

 

They can also be surprisingly withdrawn and isolated, like fives, their body language and aloof responses. Let others know they want space and privacy. They make no effort to entertain or energize others like fives. They retreat from contact and attempt to restore their energy. Again. This is very much me, the only real exception being this, being a shock to others.

 

But I think it's because my family and my friends know me well enough to know that there are times where I am just like fucking no. Integration seven goes to healthy five, a sevens learned to relax and tolerate their uncomfortable feelings. More completely. They stop using their restless minds to distract themselves.

 

Their minds become quiet, clear, and focused, allowing sevens to tap more deeply into their reserves of creativity and insight. They're able to prioritize not by imposing some arbitrary order on themselves, but by following their true interests and staying with them, thus, they become far more productive, satisfied.

 

Satisfying as companions, their capacity to find connections and to synthesize information is not drawn off into tangents. They produce results and this gives them grounds for real confidence in themselves and in life. As they experienced the world more deeply, they find each moment fascinating, profound and regulatory.

 

The idea of boredom becomes absurd as they savor the incredible mysteries of existence. See like, This I can totally get. And I, this is making me think I'm the seven, cause I'm going to look at the same things for two and I'm not going to read them completely

 

like the resentment for two under stress. They, um, can't maintain their loving attitude and. They turn into like an egocentric controlling. I can be egocentric and dominating, but I don't turn into like an egocentric Dick. When I feel like my shit has been rejected. I tend to withdraw when my shit has been rejected.

 

So I, this is I'm the opposite of this. I tend, I don't, they, what they're saying is that under stress twos tend to outburst aggressive, blah, blah, blah. And I tend to pull into myself with the security one. It says they may risk expressing their neediness and darker impulses. Again, that's not really me and the integration.

 

Yeah. See, I think just looking at all of these things about the two, it also says. It's very possessive and like people pleasing. And that's not me. I'm not really sure how I got to that. But with seven, the relationship issues. So some relationship problems can include these becoming so involved with expressing their thoughts and ideas that they do not really listen to others.

 

That would be me becoming impatient or critical of other slower pace. Just ask Jesse getting flighty or to seeking distractions. When important relationship challenges arise, fearing that others will not support them. If they're down or depressed, expecting the partner to provide gratification, entertainment, or support immediately on demand and being unwilling or very slow to make commitments.

 

A lot of this very much resonates with me. And one of the things I will say that with some of those things, they have been problems for me in the past and having a really healthy relationship has helped mitigate some of those things. So I actually think that the seven might be the closest one to me, although the biggest part of seven, that is not me as I am not adventurous, like at all.

 

So the other thing that usually happens with an Enneagram test is you might be able to know what your wing is. So it's the number that is the closest to your number on either side that you score the highest in. And for me, it would be six according to this. So let's take a look at that. Generally sixes are reliable, hardworking, organizing vigilant, dutiful, evaluating, persevering, cautious, anxious, believing, and doubting, conservative, and liberal six is get into conflicts by being pessimistic, defensive, evasive, negative worrying, doubtful negativistic, reactive, suspicious, and blaming, and at their best they're courageous cooperative disciplined, grounded, secure, faithful.

 

Self-expressive funny and affectionate. And the relationship issues for a six are getting testing the other person to see if he or she is going to stay getting over committed, causing sixes, to feel pressured and taking advantage of clamming up and not expressing their feelings or venting. The stream of anxiety is alternating between feeling dependent and needy and feeling divided to find a rebellious like rain, hot or cold becoming suspicious.

 

Doubting the Goodwill of others towards them and blaming people for their own anxieties. And there's a lot here. I can resonate as well. Although not as much as with a seven. Um, the other thing that I can see here is that here, for example, security, when six is feel secure, they begin to deal with stress by simply shutting down and becoming indifferent to their surroundings.

 

So like there are aspects of this. So if I was going to take a, like, read this and interpret it, I would say that I'm a seven wings, six. So an enthusiast wing loyalist, um, I would imagine that it's a six for my wing, not an eight, because eight was the lowest on my score. What do I think about this? I mean, honestly, most of what I'm looking at here is stuff that, like I already knew about myself and the suggestions for like levels of development and everything like healthy levels.

 

So like where is it at number seven? One of the things they say is at a healthy place at your best, I would assimilate experiences in depth, making them grateful and appreciative for what they have becoming odd by the simple wonders of life, joyful and ecstatic. Intimidations of spiritual reality of the boundless goodness of life.

 

I don't think I'm there. I think actually level three. So the lowest healthy level before you hit. Um, average levels is become accomplished. Achievers, generalists who do many things well, practical, productive, usually prolific cross fertilizing areas of interests. I think that that's kind of where I'm at with this, but I'm not sure, you know, and I mean, this, I don't know how much this is all a thing, but I appreciate the look of this.

 

It, the only thing in here that feels slightly. Christian. Like it doesn't feel Christian at all, except there is Nope. That's about it. I was going to say that like, one of their things is like, they talk about like, your passion is gluttony or plat. Passion is avarice, but they're not all the seven deadly sins, so, okay.

 

They're just using that verbiage, but yeah. Um, so I'm going to come out of this St. I'm a seven wing six and Ooh. They also have examples of who, who are sevens and who are whatever. If I'm looking at who sevens are some sevens pulling out of here, we got Joe Biden, but we also got Sarah Pailin. We got Katy Perry and Brittany Spears and Goldie Hawn and cameras.

 

There's a lot of actors on here. There's a lot of actors on here. Elton John is on here. Leonard Bernstein is on here. Who else? JFK is on your Mozart. Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin. I mean, he had gout to I Kandinsky and artist. I really admire is on here. Jim Carey, David do Cavani. There's a bunch of actors and so on.

 

And so this makes sense, like a lot of like people in like the arts seem to be on here. So that's, that's cool. Anyway, I don't know you guys, I don't know if this is garbage or if this is realistic, but I will say that it's an interesting way of looking at things, looking at things like how you resolve conflict and how you go about your life in that way.

 

So I do appreciate that. And I wonder if once I'm done with all of these personality tests, if I set them next to each other and see, do they kind of inter in line with each other or was I just in different moods those days? Cause sometimes I wonder when I'm taking these tests, um, is it just based on my mood that day?

 

Like today, am I seven and tomorrow mine eight, like who fucking knows. Right. Anyway, if you take the Enneagram, let me know, let me know what you are. Tag me on Instagram at Lama letters. And don't forget to check out my shop. All the information is in the show notes, as well as links to all of this shit.

 

The fuckery flowers are releasing later this week. I am so grateful that you're here and I am so grateful to my patrons. They are the sponsors of every episode of the podcast. And if you are interested in becoming a patron and getting early access to these episodes, then you can check it out. There is links in the show notes.

 

There's all sorts of shit in the show notes. So it's even a transcription of this. But if you're listening to this, you may not want the trans I don't fucking know. Anyway, thank you so much. I'll see you next week. And until next time friends, peace out.

 

More episodes from "The Uncurated Life Podcast"

  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    138 | What I'm Thankful For

    22:25

    This year has been a really intense, rough one… but there has been a lot that I have been grateful for as well, and I’m reflecting on it! DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop is open! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Hi there everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. I have been kind of cranky lately fuels into my bad art friend podcasts. You probably got a good like heaping helping of that, but in general, I've been a little cranky. And I think that a big part of that is. Just being stressed from all sorts of things going on in my life.   And a big part of that is my usual ambivalence towards the holidays, even though it has been so great having family here and our new puppy and everything else, but like, I tend to be very ambivalent at best towards the holidays because of all of my fucking unresolved and unrelenting grief about both my parents passing away when I was in my twenties.   Not feeling great about the holidays when my kids were small, because my marriage was not in a good place, et cetera, et cetera. I'm also really grateful for so many things right now. And I thought it would be appropriate as it is the end of November to talk a little bit about them. Not because I think that, you know, you need to go through a day feeling super grateful.   I was hate watching some Rachel. Stuff like recent stuff. And she said that it is impossible to be anxious or depressed if you're feeling grateful. And I'm like says fucking who, Dr. Hollis. So there is that. I'm not going to tell you that a gratitude practice is going to make you feel like a million bucks and that you can manifest your fucking best Elon Musk lifestyle or whatever.   I'm not saying that. But it is nice sometimes to reflect on those things, especially if you're feeling them, but they're being kind of drowned out by like the grumpiness or the whateverness to just bring them to the surface and hold them in your hand, like a pretty rock or something you found when you're walking on the beach and just like, look at it and let it be for a second.   And then you can set it down. But you'll have that memory and that feeling in you. So even if it doesn't magically cure you like some Dr. Hollis's might say at the very least, it'll brighten your day a little bit. And that's what I want to do right now. But before I get into that, because marketing is a thing I wanted to let you know, if you hadn't figured it out already that my series two of my fuckery flowers, which are my flagship art print that I sell on at sea, they are beautiful botanicals flowers.   I've got some herbs in this newest series of 12. Um, they're beautiful mixed media paintings that I create prints out of that have naughty words hidden in them. And the latest series a is not going anywhere. However, the shop is not going to be open for. Uh, much longer. It'll be open for another couple of weeks.   I believe I'm going to close it maybe the second week of December, because of the way that shipping is going right now, the slow downs and everything else. I just want to make sure you're not going to order anything and want it there by a certain timeframe. And then have that get all fucked because of shipping.   So my best way to control that is to just shut the shop down till the end of the year. But my goal is to reopen it. But if you would like to get your hands on those prints along with anything else that's in there. Before then I would just suggest you check it out and you can find all of that information in the show notes.   Now that I've said all of that, I would like to reflect I've done this before. This is not the first time I've done an episode like this. I would just like to reflect on some things that I'm grateful for. And maybe by listening to me talk about those things, it will help you reflect on some things you might be grateful for.   Maybe save this episode for a day when you're feeling extra fucking grumpy, but you want to listen to something that will help you maybe think through some of those things to just help ease a little bit of that, even if it doesn't change it. Now, of course, if you're really grumpy, sometimes I am and I listened to an episode like this.   I'd be like, fuck you, Cindy. I trust that you know yourself and that you would know the best time for something like this. So let's get into it. What am I grateful for? One thing I'm grateful for, which is probably one of the most complicated things that I'm grateful for is having my kids with me basically.   Full-time this is. Amazing for me. I have not had my kids with me full time. For the most part, since RJ was three and Kat was five when Russell and I split up and I've had them with me full time since August, because they moved to Denver with us. Now, the reason this is complicated is that I am divorced and I share custody of them.   And up until we moved to Denver because of Jesse's job, the kids had a 50, 50 custody split with their dad. And by. Doing this by making this move, we gave the kids the choice of where they wanted to be. Full-time because it was important that they have agency. They're both teenagers. Kat actually turns 18 at the end of December.   Holy shit. And RJ is 15, be 16 in March. And so they really do have agency in this and they wanted to come with us. And so they spend most of their summer with their dad and, um, their breaks, like fall break, winter break, spring break with their dad. So it's complicated because I am so happy to have them with me full time for a number of reasons, a because they're with me full time, it's easier to see certain things that were going under the radar when they were doing the 50 50 custody, because the vibe at each house was so different, which is now it's natural, right.   Two different households, but the kids would adapt to that. And because of that, There were certain ongoing problems, especially with one of my kids, both physically and mentally that were harder to gauge because you didn't have the context of them. Full-time and you had to depend on them reporting to you.   And as I'm sure many of, you know, especially those of you who struggle with mental health things, I struggle with mental health things that I can tell you flat out that self reporting is not accurate. But the, sometimes it's the best you have to go with. But when you have somebody with you full time, not only do you have their self-reporting, but you have your own observation, which is much more consistent.   And then on top of that, then you also don't have the transitions happening so often. So things kind of stay a little bit more mellow on the home front. So it really allows you to see what's happening. And that has been extremely helpful in so many ways. So there's that. And I mean, there's also just like the joy of having them here full time, but I recognize that while I'm grateful for that, it comes at a cost.   It comes at the cost of my ex-husband knocking to spend anywhere near as much time with them, which I can't even imagine if I was in the same situation. And on top of that, my kids don't get to see their dad as often. And that's an entirely different thing and they moved, they moved from Napa to Denver, like.   Another big cost as part of that, like Jesse and I had to make the move because of his job, but they didn't have to do that. And they did. And I'm grateful that they did, but I recognize that the gratefulness comes with a price. And so that is very much something that I have been reflecting on this year.   It's it's, bittersweets not even the right word. Complicated is basically kind of where I'm feeling with. Another thing that is a complicated feeling is low-key my cat, who we had to put down at the end of September, was at the end of September. It was in the fall, like, which we're still in, but like we had to put low-key down.   He had terminal. Failure. We think it was cancer, but it came on quickly enough. And it was so devastating to a system that even if it was cancer, there was nothing we could do. Like his kidneys were destroyed. So we couldn't fix that. Even if we stopped whatever it was, he still wouldn't have any kidney function.   I'm so grateful for the time that we had with him, because not only was he the sweetest leukemia, but on top of that, if it wasn't for me having him and. Realizing that my anti pet stance was outdated. We wouldn't have Lou who is our other cat who's two and is an absolute little wackadoo, but I fucking adore him.   And we wouldn't have gotten our new puppy, Layla, who is an absolute sweetie. So I'm grateful for our time with him, but again, it's complicated, both because I'm sad and I miss him, but also having and watching your cat fail that quickly with kidney problems and seeing his decline and seeing what it went through as somebody who also had.   Kidney failure. Like I am in chronic kidney disease. I cannot my kidney disease. There is no healing from it. I will not get better from it. A transplant will help as a treatment, but it will bring its own set of situations. And my diseases, genetic, I will never be better. I will never be better. And so seeing my cat go through kids like Jessie, Was struggling sometimes with how I was reacting to him dying, like being in that place before we put him down.   And I realized it was like, this I'm really close to this. Like I'm not a cat, but I'm in kidney failure myself. And so seeing his decline and seeing a once vibrant kitty, like really, really go downhill fast as somebody with kidney failure that really sucked. On, like, not just the, I love my kitty, but oh my God.   I also am sick kind of a situation. So like I said, I'm so grateful for the time we had together, but like the first point I made very complicated and I will say. On a very uncomplicated note. I am so grateful for our new house. I love our new house. I love how much space there is and that we can have family here.   And it gives me more time to enjoy them before I start losing my shit, because I have house guests. I love that there's room for my cat and my puppy to have space from each other, for my kids to have space from us. And yet still the arrangement of the house makes it so that we have places like the kitchen and the family room where like we can.   Come together as a family and not feel so lonely. I love having my nice big office. I love having our beautiful backyard. I love our neighborhood. It's another thing I'm grateful for our fucking neighbors. Our rad, I had that later on my list, but it just basically came in. We have rat ass neighbors. We love our neighborhood.   We love our location, very close to like a target and a Costco and an awesome Asian supermarket and just all sorts of things. I'm very, very grateful for it. And some of the things that have happened, like low-key passing away and some of the things we're going through with the kids right now, a little bit of that is mitigated by being in such a peaceful and beautiful and comforting new setting.   I had to take a pause for a second and put the lotion on my skin or else I get the hose again, because my knuckles are so dry. One thing that comes from the relocation is the desert atmosphere of Denver and goddammit. If my knuckles are not just raw. And so I'm also grateful, unplanned, grateful for trader Joe's moisturizing, hand cream, not sponsored.   I'm very grateful for the new transplant center being close to our house. So I dunno, I think I've said this in a few places, but for context, when Jesse and I shopped for a house in the burbs of Denver, we had some specific. Things we were looking for, like there was a school district we wanted to be a part of and distance from Jesse's potential new office and just various things like that, as well as like the aspects of the actual house we were looking for, there were like needs and wants that we had there.   But another thing that we put into our search that our realtor put into our search for us was that we wanted it to be within half an hour driving to. Of the new transplant center. And the reason for this is because when you get a kidney transplant, you have to make a bunch of appointments to the transplant center in the pre-transplant timeframe, like the workups and everything like that.   But then once you get the transplant for. You're in the hospital for several days. My sister was in the ICU for like five days. And the reason she was in the ICU is because they have to keep an eye on you to make sure that you're getting the right levels of immunosuppressant so that you don't reject the new organ.   And because you have something foreign in your body, your body's starting to produce an immune response, which they need to take care of, blah, blah, blah. So it's nice. And I know this from experience because we stayed in a condo five minutes from the hospital. When my sister got her transplant, it is very nice to be close enough to the hospital, to be able to go back to the house and take a shower and like have some lunch or whatever, and then go back and see someone.   So there's that. But then on top of that, a, when you have a transplant, you need to stay within. An hour of the center for the month after the transplant, both because you're going back there multiple times per week for blood work and everything else. And also because you, in case you have an emergency or anything going on with the transplant, they want you to come to the transplant center to deal with it.   They're not to some random hospital, so you need to be close enough to be able to get emergency care at the transplant center. My sister lives three hours from her transplant center. So like I said, she got a condo that thankfully one of her congregation members, the church that she's in the you use has a condo within five minutes of the hospital and they loaned it to Amy for the month.   But we weren't going to know people who were going to be able to do that for us in Denver. So, and in San Francisco, when we lived in Napa at that transplant center, On a day with no traffic, I could possibly make it there within an hour, but probably not. And so we were going to be doing the same thing.   I'm like looking for somewhere to stay and you know, it's just not the business. And especially when you're recovering from surgery, you don't want to stay in like a hotel room for a month. I mean, you might have to, but that's not like. So we very much wanted to be close to the transplant center because we knew that that was going to be something that we needed.   Well, the reason I'm so grateful for it is because as I have started going for my initial appointments and everything else, as well as other doctor's appointments, because I'm getting the rest of my medical care through the same university health system, I've had to go there so many times, both for me and for my kids.   And it is not. To live like 13 minutes from the transplant center. And I can only imagine how much nicer it will be once we actually get into the whole transplant situation. So yeah, I'm fucking grateful. We made that choice because it is already paying off on top of that. And like adjacent to that, I am so grateful for all of the medical professionals that we have been seeing for my kid.   One of my kids is dealing with some as yet undefined. Medical problems. They have, they have physical problems, they have mental health issues. And then they're also dealing with some issues surrounding food. They're all playing off of each other. And we are trying to basically unravel a rat's nest of cords, and we have no idea where to start.   So we're just sort of picking at them when we were in Napa, our pediatrician, who had been our pediatrician for like 12, 13 years since we moved there. Was wonderful, but because it was the pandemic and B Napa is a little isolated from the rest of the bay. It was hard to get in, to see specialists when we got here, because we're in a Metro area and we're close to like the university health care system.   We got referred fairly quickly to children's hospital. And since getting into that particular system, we have seen multiple different specialists. And even though we're still trying to unravel that rat's nest, we are making slow and sure progress and the medical professionals that we have been seeing, the doctors, the residents, the nurses, the, even the people like the administrative people, everybody that we've been seeing through both children's hospital and our pediatrician's office have been nothing but accommodating and helpful.   They have been just amazing in all sorts of ways and communicative and gone to bat for us, with insurance and all sorts of different things. And so it has been. Relieving as well as something I'm super grateful for because as a parent, you want to be able to fix the problem, but when you can't figure out what the problem is, it can be so frustrating.   And I'm just, I'm so grateful that the team of people we have been working with has been accessible and helpful and communicative and, and kind and funny and just so much. It's exhausting and stressful to see so many doctors, both myself and my kid are so over it, but it would have been so much worse if we had not been seen by such an amazing group of people.   And so if anybody from children's hospital in Colorado is listening fucking rock. With your cock out. And on that same note, the school has been so helpful. My kids are at a great public high school here, and they both have gotten nothing but great support from the counseling team, from the nurses. We've had appointments with teachers to talk through some stuff, and it's just been, it's been really great.   It's been really great to come as a new family, to a high school with neither kids during, as a freshmen one as a sophomore, one is a senior to be able to come in here and be able to get as much support as we've gotten, especially considering some of the obstacles that have been in one of my kid's way.   It's just been really great. It sounds like I'm doing like an Oscar speech, but I'm not it's if you guys can understand that as a parent, like for me, It is really, really stressful when your kids have things that they're dealing with that you can't fix. And so having a supportive network in a new place where we don't really know very many people has been just it's it's I am so grateful.   I can only imagine how frazzled I would be if we had been running into like obstinacy or shittiness with some of these people and we have. So knock on wood that continues now. Any grateful list, any gratitude list I have would not be complete without my family on it. But I'm so grateful for my family, both in being able to see some of them in this last month, but also just in general, being able to talk to, or to, I am not the best communicator when it comes to my family.   Like, I, I am hard to reach by phone and I'm terrible at returning phone calls. And I am just, I can be an island of myself and my family calls me on my bullshit, but also. It's just so amazing at being there when I need them and to interact with my sisters, especially as adults with our like complicated adult lives and to be able to feel so comforted when I'm with them either physically or on the phone is just so soothing to me.   And so hilarious to imagine what my parents would think of all of us, but like, I just, I wish I could just snuggle all my family all the time, but that's just not the thing. Well, there's the family, that's here in the house, my kids and Jesse and Lou and Layla. And I am so grateful for all of them as well, but, but sometimes like, it's like my sisters, my grandpa, my uncle, my cousin, like all my peeps, just so grateful as Jesse's family to Jesse's family is awesome.   Yeah. Family. Totally a good thing. And then finally, the biggest thing I'm grateful for right now, I'm gonna have the biggest, but one of the most present things I'm grateful for is all of you, my community. And that sounds hokey, but it's not. And I could tell you why, because. I have had some times in the last couple of months where I've had like major migraines or been feeling like shit and the amount of support I get from you all in the DMS and whatever, it, I'm not great at always responding, especially when I have migraine, but I see them and it, it helps.   It's like Excedrin for migraine, except I'm allowed to have it. Cause I'm not allowed to have Excedrin for migraine. Cause my kidneys. And then when I reopened my shop in October, I wasn't expecting much to happen because I hadn't released like my calendars or the new series yet. And there was so much support and so many people interested and I just, you guys, it means a lot.   It really does. It really, really does. And I just, I need you to know that I need you to know how grateful I am for you. If you're listening to this. And you're in my community and I'm grateful for you. And if you feel unseen in your life, or if you feel taken for granted, or if you feel just blahzay or whatever, or even if you don't know that, I appreciate you.   And I mean, it I'm getting like teary-eyed because I'm fucking weepy ass fool, but like, I really appreciate you. I'm glad you're here and I cannot wait to see what else we can do together. And now I feel a little bit better. I'm not quite so cranky. And I started this with like some complicated gratitude stuff, and I was like, Cindy, you might be going about this, the wrong way for what you were hoping for.   But you know, I do feel a little bit better. I'm still cranky. I'm still terminally ill. I guess I did not cure my depression, Dr. Rachel Hollis. But what I did do was put a little bit of Alovera on it and that's what I needed right now. And I hope that that at least a little bit help. Don't forget, check out series two, fuckery flowers, and please check out my Patrion.   Even if you're not interested in becoming a patron. If you see one of my patrons in the wild, thank them because they sponsored this, they make this possible, and I appreciate the shit out of them. So very much everything I said about appreciating my community. They get double. Anyway, I hope you find something that you can reflect on today that maybe puts a little Alovera on.   Feelings you have at the moment. And until next time friends, peace out.
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    137 | What's My Enneagram?

    20:13

    In part 2 of my Personality Test Adventures I’m heading down the path of the Enneagram, the darling of Christian Instagram. DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop is open! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED DISC Episode - https://uncuratedlife.libsyn.com/133-my-first-personality-test-disc About the enneagram - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/how-the-enneagram-system-works Test - https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/rheti Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Well, hi there friends. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where I take personality tests and tell you all about them for your amusement. That's not the only thing we do here, but that is a series that I started relatively recently. So this is the second episode. The first episode was the D I S C assessment.   And I will link that in the show notes, if you would like to check it out and you haven't already, that was episode 1 33, but today we are going to be taking a look at the Darlene of Christian Instagram, the Enneagram test. Now here's the thing with personality tests. I'm generally skeptical about them, but enough people asked me to take them.   That I decided to just do this for the amusement of the internet. So I promise I go into these tests with an open mind and I am not being snarky when I answered the questions and actually take the test. Even if I'm snarky. When I talk about the test, when I take it, I'm taking it seriously. You may not believe me, but I swear I am now before we get into the actual test, give me a moment to mention that my latest series series two of my fuckery flowers, which are my flagship art print.   They're a beautiful flowers in botanicals. Mixed media paintings that I create prints out of, and they're realistic, but hidden within them as a naughty word. Fucking love them. I have a new series of 12 launching this coming Thursday, the 25th, the link is in the show notes and the shop is only going to be open until December 10th and then I'm going to shut it down for the holidays.   So. Shipping does not bite us in the ass. So just be sure to check it out when you're able, there will be some bundles that will be limited edition showing up just for black Friday weekend, blah, blah, blah. Check it out. Let's get to the test. So what is the Enneagram? So from the website, Truity they say.   The Enneagram is a system of personality typing that describes patterns in how people interpret the world and manage their emotions. The Enneagram describes nine personality types and maps. Each of these out on a nine pointed diagram, which helps to illustrate how. Relate to one another. The Enneagram is mostly used for personal self knowledge and personality development, offering a powerful tool for better understanding your core motivations and applying that knowledge to all areas of your life, including conflict resolution, team dynamics, leadership, and emotional intelligence, because it identifies opportunities for development for each individual type.   It has become widely used in. Such as counseling psychotherapy, business development, parenting, and education and quote. So like the quote said there are nine types and I pulled these from the Enneagram institute.com note that they're highlights. They're not the full spectrum of each type. Just to give you an idea of each type.   So type one is. A is principled purposeful, self controlled and a perfectionist type two is generous. Demonstrative people-pleasing and possessive type three is adaptable, excelling, driven, an image conscious type fours, expressive, dramatic self-absorbed and temperamental type five is perceptive innovative, secretive, and isolated.   Type six is engaging responsible, anxious, and suspicious type seven is spontaneous, versatile acquisitive and scattered type eight is self-confident decisive, willful and confrontational type nine is receptive, reassuring, complacent, and resigned. So it's nine types. It's a whole bunch of information. If you want to read more, like I said, links will all be in the show notes.   Now I said at the beginning, the Darlene of Christian Instagram now, well, the Enneagram is not rooted in Christianity in recent years. It has really taken root in a lot of the communities. The first time I attempted to take this test a couple of years ago, the free test I found was explicitly Christian.   And I note right the fuck out of there because I'm not Christian. And. A ton of the books I've found on different Enneagram types are written from a Christian perspective, like devotionals for type threes or how to be a type three. And then they don't say that they're Christian, but then you look at them and they're pretty fucking Christian.   It's not my jam dude. And so I'm not like in. The test I did find is science-based allegedly, what does it say? Science-based or scientifically validated force choice, personality test. Uh, it didn't seem to be Christian. When I looked at it, it costs $12. And according to the website takes about 40 minutes to complete.   Now there are plenty of free tests out there. You just need to be careful if you're not somebody who wants to take one from a Christian perspective to just keep an eye out for that. And on top of that, a lot of them will give you information, but you gotta like give them your email to get the rest of it and blah, blah, blah.   So just that, that's the point. The one I am taking is the. Test the Riso Hudson Enneagram type indicator routine version 2.5. And that is linked in the description. So. It says here that it has been independently scientifically validated rather than just indicating your basic type. It produces a full personality profile across all nine types, providing you a unique portrait relative indicating your relative strengths and weaknesses of the nine types within your overall personnel.   All right. So that's the one I'm taking. I will pause you here and go take it. If you want to take one of the tests and do it with me, then post, we can post about it on Instagram stories, blah, blah, blah. But I'll be back. I'll be back. All right. So I am done with the test. It went pretty quickly for me. I wound up doing it about 20, 25 minutes, but I tend to read really quickly and I didn't hesitate.   There were a couple where I think I read the question wrong. So I went back and was right about that and then answered it. So according to my results, my highest Enneagram type is two with seven being very close second. And then my lowest was type eight. So. I looked at this and two is the helper.   Generally twos are caring, empathetic, warm, thoughtful, appreciative, generous, other oriented, tactile affectionate, well, intention and demonstrative. They get into conflict by being people pleasing, flattering, ingratiating, clingy, worried, possessive insincere, seductive self-important, and self deceptive. And at their best twos are encouraging, loving self nurturing.   Constant joyous, humble, forgiving, gracious, and compassionate. So I see aspects of myself in this one, but I think that the second one, which is very close to the first. Is a little bit more me because I, one of the things I read about the Enneagram is that your original personality type is the way you like.   It's something that's constant throughout your life. And I feel like a lot of the aspects of the two are things that I have developed through like working on myself, but seven, the enthusiastic, I read that one and I was like, Hmm. So sevens are excitable spontaneous, curious, optimistic, eager, outgoing, future oriented, adventurous variety, seeking quick and talkative.   They get into conflicts by being scattered, distracted, restless, impatient thrill-seeking escapist, overextended, irresponsible, demanding, and excessive. And at their best, they are appreciative bountiful, thoughtful, accomplished, versatile, receptive, grateful content, quiet and passionate. Type seven exemplifies the desire for freedom and variety and for exploring the many rich experiences that life offers they're spontaneous and upbeat.   They find life exhilarating that the kind of people who and see like this also in some ways like there's aspects of this that are very much me, but there are aspects that I'm not adventurous. And I don't feel my social calendar like.   So there is that. Now one of the things I wanted to look at to see if maybe I could figure out which one of these I was, and I could see the, now I'm going to the third one, which was five, generally fives are focused, observant, curious, insightful expert studious. Complex perceptive, whimsical, profound unsentimental ex no, this isn't me as much either.   I don't know you guys. I need to sit down and talk to Jesse about this and be like, which one it ma, but I feel like, Ooh, sorry about the odd by goodness, but I feel like seven. So I'm going to go to the personality dynamics and variations to see if I can kind of. Kinda hammer this out under stress. Seven goes to average one sevens value their spontaneity and tend to follow their impulses for better or for worse.   As a result, they can become scattered in their attention and energy leaping from one idea to the next, from one activity to another. While this can be exciting. It often leaves seven's frustrated with themselves because they feel like they are not accomplishing as much as they would like to. At such times they begin to behave like average ones pulling in the reins on themselves and trying to get more organized and self controlled.   But because they are trying to impose order and control on themselves, they begin to feel trapped and restricted. This just makes them more frustrated, impatient, and irritable. They may, for instance, become critical of their own creativity. Creative. Before they have had a chance to develop them. Similarly, they cannot avoid feeling disappointment with people and aspects of their environment.   Nothing meets their expectations and they can become harsh and perfectionistic be critical with themselves. And with others, see that that is fucking like razor sharp. Security seven goes to an average five sevens often feel it is their duty to entertain others and keep their environment positive and exciting over time.   This can be exhausting even for sevens, when they are tired of being on for everyone, they may choose to withdraw even from their intimates and seek seclusion. And noninterference, this can come as a shock to others. You've been out having fun with everyone else. Why are you so quiet and unavailable? They no longer want to put out energy for anyone else and can become almost obsessively focused and preoccupied.   They can also be surprisingly withdrawn and isolated, like fives, their body language and aloof responses. Let others know they want space and privacy. They make no effort to entertain or energize others like fives. They retreat from contact and attempt to restore their energy. Again. This is very much me, the only real exception being this, being a shock to others.   But I think it's because my family and my friends know me well enough to know that there are times where I am just like fucking no. Integration seven goes to healthy five, a sevens learned to relax and tolerate their uncomfortable feelings. More completely. They stop using their restless minds to distract themselves.   Their minds become quiet, clear, and focused, allowing sevens to tap more deeply into their reserves of creativity and insight. They're able to prioritize not by imposing some arbitrary order on themselves, but by following their true interests and staying with them, thus, they become far more productive, satisfied.   Satisfying as companions, their capacity to find connections and to synthesize information is not drawn off into tangents. They produce results and this gives them grounds for real confidence in themselves and in life. As they experienced the world more deeply, they find each moment fascinating, profound and regulatory.   The idea of boredom becomes absurd as they savor the incredible mysteries of existence. See like, This I can totally get. And I, this is making me think I'm the seven, cause I'm going to look at the same things for two and I'm not going to read them completely   like the resentment for two under stress. They, um, can't maintain their loving attitude and. They turn into like an egocentric controlling. I can be egocentric and dominating, but I don't turn into like an egocentric Dick. When I feel like my shit has been rejected. I tend to withdraw when my shit has been rejected.   So I, this is I'm the opposite of this. I tend, I don't, they, what they're saying is that under stress twos tend to outburst aggressive, blah, blah, blah. And I tend to pull into myself with the security one. It says they may risk expressing their neediness and darker impulses. Again, that's not really me and the integration.   Yeah. See, I think just looking at all of these things about the two, it also says. It's very possessive and like people pleasing. And that's not me. I'm not really sure how I got to that. But with seven, the relationship issues. So some relationship problems can include these becoming so involved with expressing their thoughts and ideas that they do not really listen to others.   That would be me becoming impatient or critical of other slower pace. Just ask Jesse getting flighty or to seeking distractions. When important relationship challenges arise, fearing that others will not support them. If they're down or depressed, expecting the partner to provide gratification, entertainment, or support immediately on demand and being unwilling or very slow to make commitments.   A lot of this very much resonates with me. And one of the things I will say that with some of those things, they have been problems for me in the past and having a really healthy relationship has helped mitigate some of those things. So I actually think that the seven might be the closest one to me, although the biggest part of seven, that is not me as I am not adventurous, like at all.   So the other thing that usually happens with an Enneagram test is you might be able to know what your wing is. So it's the number that is the closest to your number on either side that you score the highest in. And for me, it would be six according to this. So let's take a look at that. Generally sixes are reliable, hardworking, organizing vigilant, dutiful, evaluating, persevering, cautious, anxious, believing, and doubting, conservative, and liberal six is get into conflicts by being pessimistic, defensive, evasive, negative worrying, doubtful negativistic, reactive, suspicious, and blaming, and at their best they're courageous cooperative disciplined, grounded, secure, faithful.   Self-expressive funny and affectionate. And the relationship issues for a six are getting testing the other person to see if he or she is going to stay getting over committed, causing sixes, to feel pressured and taking advantage of clamming up and not expressing their feelings or venting. The stream of anxiety is alternating between feeling dependent and needy and feeling divided to find a rebellious like rain, hot or cold becoming suspicious.   Doubting the Goodwill of others towards them and blaming people for their own anxieties. And there's a lot here. I can resonate as well. Although not as much as with a seven. Um, the other thing that I can see here is that here, for example, security, when six is feel secure, they begin to deal with stress by simply shutting down and becoming indifferent to their surroundings.   So like there are aspects of this. So if I was going to take a, like, read this and interpret it, I would say that I'm a seven wings, six. So an enthusiast wing loyalist, um, I would imagine that it's a six for my wing, not an eight, because eight was the lowest on my score. What do I think about this? I mean, honestly, most of what I'm looking at here is stuff that, like I already knew about myself and the suggestions for like levels of development and everything like healthy levels.   So like where is it at number seven? One of the things they say is at a healthy place at your best, I would assimilate experiences in depth, making them grateful and appreciative for what they have becoming odd by the simple wonders of life, joyful and ecstatic. Intimidations of spiritual reality of the boundless goodness of life.   I don't think I'm there. I think actually level three. So the lowest healthy level before you hit. Um, average levels is become accomplished. Achievers, generalists who do many things well, practical, productive, usually prolific cross fertilizing areas of interests. I think that that's kind of where I'm at with this, but I'm not sure, you know, and I mean, this, I don't know how much this is all a thing, but I appreciate the look of this.   It, the only thing in here that feels slightly. Christian. Like it doesn't feel Christian at all, except there is Nope. That's about it. I was going to say that like, one of their things is like, they talk about like, your passion is gluttony or plat. Passion is avarice, but they're not all the seven deadly sins, so, okay.   They're just using that verbiage, but yeah. Um, so I'm going to come out of this St. I'm a seven wing six and Ooh. They also have examples of who, who are sevens and who are whatever. If I'm looking at who sevens are some sevens pulling out of here, we got Joe Biden, but we also got Sarah Pailin. We got Katy Perry and Brittany Spears and Goldie Hawn and cameras.   There's a lot of actors on here. There's a lot of actors on here. Elton John is on here. Leonard Bernstein is on here. Who else? JFK is on your Mozart. Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin. I mean, he had gout to I Kandinsky and artist. I really admire is on here. Jim Carey, David do Cavani. There's a bunch of actors and so on.   And so this makes sense, like a lot of like people in like the arts seem to be on here. So that's, that's cool. Anyway, I don't know you guys, I don't know if this is garbage or if this is realistic, but I will say that it's an interesting way of looking at things, looking at things like how you resolve conflict and how you go about your life in that way.   So I do appreciate that. And I wonder if once I'm done with all of these personality tests, if I set them next to each other and see, do they kind of inter in line with each other or was I just in different moods those days? Cause sometimes I wonder when I'm taking these tests, um, is it just based on my mood that day?   Like today, am I seven and tomorrow mine eight, like who fucking knows. Right. Anyway, if you take the Enneagram, let me know, let me know what you are. Tag me on Instagram at Lama letters. And don't forget to check out my shop. All the information is in the show notes, as well as links to all of this shit.   The fuckery flowers are releasing later this week. I am so grateful that you're here and I am so grateful to my patrons. They are the sponsors of every episode of the podcast. And if you are interested in becoming a patron and getting early access to these episodes, then you can check it out. There is links in the show notes.   There's all sorts of shit in the show notes. So it's even a transcription of this. But if you're listening to this, you may not want the trans I don't fucking know. Anyway, thank you so much. I'll see you next week. And until next time friends, peace out.  
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    136 | Bad Art Friend + Altruistic Kidney Donation

    24:50

    Have you heard of the Bad Art Friend story? I have so many thoughts, but today unsurprisingly I’m zeroing in on the part that touches me personally… the kidney donation part. DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop is open! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED Original Bad Art Friend Article - https://www.nytimes.com/2021/10/05/magazine/dorland-v-larson.html Plan With Me - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewZzIORQKYw Insider Article - https://www.insider.com/bad-art-friend-kidney-donation-nyt-dawn-dorland-sonya-larson-2021-10 Savy's stream (starts when the BAF talk begins) - https://youtu.be/sOsWU7Ampuc?t=8738 Slate - https://slate.com/technology/2021/10/bad-art-friend-kidney-crisis-donation-altruism.html Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Well, hello friends, welcome back to the uncurated life podcast, where we talk about all the things having to do with our lives and how we live them on the internet. And today's story today's episode. I talked a little bit about it in a recent plan with me, but I'm going to talk more about it today. I just, you guys like.   This is one of those situations where so many different things cross, and I could spend hours talking about it, but I'm not, I'm going to zero in on probably the most obvious point for me to zero in on. But yet at the same time has been one of the lesser talked about aspects of this entire story. And the story I'm referring to is the bad art friend story.   So if you do not know what it's about, I'm going to give you a very brief overview. I gave a bigger overview in, I plan with me and I will link the original story, which I recommend you read from the New York times, because it's a fascinatingly written story that kind of. Presents things in a way where it sort of serves like a Rorschach test for you based on who you side with.   And of course there's a lot of other articles dissecting it online, but I'm going to give you enough context so that you understand my grievances or my things I want to talk about. But before I get into. What I'm talking about today, I would like to make sure that you are signed up for my newsletter, which I send out on the first Monday of every month.   And then I might send out an alert if something like opens up when the calendars went on sale this week or this last week. But. This month's freebie is a coloring sheet of my fuckery rose, which I think is really adorable. And if you sign up during this month, you'll get it automatically. Everybody who's on the newsletter.   Got it already, but you'll get it this month. But if you're not on the newsletter before the end of November, you're not going to get this. It's only people who are either on it or sign up for it in November. And. I really think it's fucking cute, especially since I'm releasing the new series this month as well.   Anyway, newsletter link, as well as all of the articles that I'll be referencing are all in the show notes. So be sure to check them out. All right. So here is. Here is a bit of the story. And it will say upfront that this story touches on so many different nerves, right? It touches on racism and classism, how we perceive friendship versus the reality of a friendship, plagiarism, writing, etiquette, social hierarchies, the privacy of DMS and text messages.   The story basically. Has all of these elements in it, which makes it so fascinating. And on top of that, it's about writers. And while I have written books, I don't consider myself like a writer writer because my books are not that sort of writing, but from what my writer, friends have said to me, It's not surprising at all that a story like this came out of the writing community, because it is a very insular and kind of gossipy commute can be gossipy.   Not that every writer has gossip and not that all communities are gossipy, but like this particular group of writers and this area of writers in Boston is. Has at least somewhat of a reputation from what I have heard. Anyway, like I said, read the story. It's a fascinating read, but I'm going to go to an insider article that actually has a pretty good recap of it.   Because if I try to go through the actual article, I'm going to like get lost in it. And so here are the basics. It's a feud between two different writers, Dawn Dorland and Sonia Larson. Don darlin altruistically donated a kidney. Now, when you altruistically donate a kidney, it means it's a non-directed donation.   You don't know how it's going to. These are the most rare of donations, and I'm going to go into this a bit later, but suffice to say she donated a kidney to a string. As a living donor and then create a Facebook group to share news and information about her donation. She saw Sonya Larson who she, I guess, interacted at a place called grub street in Boston.   It's like a writers like where you can get educated and shit like that. I'm not entirely certain what the, I couldn't discern what grub street actually was. But Don went to like writing workshops and was familiar and have been to a lot of writing things, but wasn't, hadn't really like published anything yet.   Sonya Larson has published things and his friends, like in a group of friends from this grub street with these other authors and they call themselves the chunky monkeys, which okay. But the, this, this comes to pear to bear. Right. So. Don post. This group invites people to, it tells them this is not made clear in the article, but tells them that they do not have to join or hang out in the group if they don't want to.   She just wants to make sure people who are interested can get information about this and so new joins, but doesn't ever say anything and dog. In one of the first like cringy things in this story messages, Sonia is like, did you know, I donated a kidney because she hadn't responded to any of her messages and they had a bit of an exchange.   And so Don knew now that Sonia was aware of it. Time passes and Dawn finds out that Sonia has written a short story that is getting some attention about a Asian woman who gets a kidney donation from a white woman who is narcissistic and needs attention. And it's very much about a white savior trope.   Is this stuff that with the whole story is about, but that's the character who in previous additions of the story was named Dawn. And the letter that this white woman wrote to the Asian woman was copied from the letter that Don wrote to the final recipient in her kidney chain. Now, when Don found out about this, she sits something to Sonia.   So when you changed some of the wording in the letter, but swore up and down, she wasn't trying, she was just inspired, blah, blah, blah. And it wasn't about Dawn, even though the characters name was Dawn originally. This all turns into a bunch of lawsuits, Sonia files for defamation, Don files back there's like stories get pulled from a big competition and so on and so forth.   And the biggest kind of thing that gets thrown into this is that when Don is in the discovery phase for one of her lawsuits, her lawyers subpoena the DMS and emails of Sonya, and it comes out that there's this group, text of these chunky monkeys, making fun of Dawn for her. Kidney donation and calling her like needy and, and that she's cringy and that they're not friends with her, even though Don assumed she was friends with them.   And there's a lot of like stuff in these DMS to show that indeed Sonya did write the story in part two to rip on Dawn. That, that was part of it. So, and this is ongoing. There is not a resolution for this, but as you can see, there were lots of tweets, examining performative, altruism, bullying, copyright privilege.   People were very divided Celeste, Inc. The author of little fires everywhere. Who's one of the chunky monkeys and was in these group, texts comes on and like goes hard on Twitter to defend Sonya, which sounds freaky. Uh, it just, I don't even know, man, but there's like a lot of people talking about like mean girls and that like, so when you was a mean girl who plagiarized and Dawn was a needy cringy person who doesn't understand social cues.   And I will say that the conversations around this. I have been very much rooted in talking about the donation, the rate, the way that Sonia put racism into the story, the mean girls, the bullying, all of those things. One thing that wasn't really talked about was, um, class Dawn comes from, uh, poverty and Sonja comes from like an upper middle class upbringing.   And. Savvy from savvy writes books who I really enjoy channel. I've talked about her before she had a live stream where she talked about class cues and how, you know, when you don't like some of the things that are considered to be like go shh, or, um, or I don't know, what's the word I'm looking for here?   Like, like that's not how we do things. We don't talk about money this way. We need to humblebrag, not just brag about certain things. That the way that Don was just being earnest about talking about her kidney. Is not classy compared to people who have been from a upper, like an upper class upbringing, which is an actual thing.   I grew up in poverty. I understood exactly what savvy was talking about, even though I'm having trouble articulating it. So go check that out if you're interested in that conversation, because I found it fascinating and I have it linked in the description at the timestamp, because it's quite a bit into the big live stream that she did anyway.   With all of that being said. And like I said, I'm going to keep telling you, like, pause this podcast, go read the article, get a bit of context around it before you come back as a bunch linked in the show notes. But what I wanted to talk about. Was, and this is no surprise to any of you who have been around and know that I have genetic kidney disease and I'm currently cruising into kidney failure and I'm on the transplant list and need a kidney donation.   Right? So you can imagine that. And my sister and I talked about this, she has a transplant from a living donor. And one of the things that really concerned me about the discourse online around this, as well as some of the things that the chunky monkey said, Sonia specifically in the DMS that were published upon the internet, that it really concerned me that it seems like kidney donation became kind of a joke question, mark.   Like, not entirely, but like, like what does she expect us to do? Donate a kidney. I don't know. Maybe you fucking should someone to give you now that I've, contexted the shit out of you with this story. I'm going to, I'm going to give you a more, you know, moment and give you some information about kidney donation.   Not for my own personal sake, but because I want to. Like, whether you think Dawn is cringey, whether you think that she was needy for attention, whatever the case may be. I want you to really understand what she did and the significance of it. So you can maybe give her a little bit more space when it comes to being cringy.   Cause sure. I thought she was cringy too when I read it, but who fucking cares because cringiness is way outweighed by what she did. So here's a little context about kidney donation, the wait list for kidney. For people who need a kidney is usually a brown, a hundred thousand people long at any given time in the United States.   Every day, people die waiting for a transplant and that's from the people who are on the transplant list. This doesn't count people who are on dialysis, who are in kidney failure, who don't qualify for kidney transplant, because maybe they're too sick. Like my great aunt, Ella, who also has PKD and actually got called for a transplant only for them to see at that point, she was just too sick to get the transplant.   And so they took her off the list and she just won't be able to get. She's just too fragile. Right. And then of course, there's that person that like went around the news relatively recently through the university of Colorado, which is where I'm getting on the new transplant list. After moving to Denver who was denied transplant because she refused to get the COVID vaccine and people are like, oh my God, her rights.   It's like, you know, the death camps or whatever. No motherfucker. No, no. If you know anything about transplant, then you know that a, there is a shortage of organs and B it is a very intensive, like surgery requires a lot of manpower. It requires a lot of people and it requires you to be compliant, not just ahead of time before you get the transplant, but for the rest of your life, the life of that organ, you have to be compliant.   If you miss your meds, even once it could go into rejection. And so transplant centers and transplant. Doctors, the teams that manage transplants are extremely cautious about who they put onto a transplant list, because they need to make sure that the organ donation has the highest chance of success.   Because there are so many people in need and there are so many people who will die before they get one because of the shortage of organs. So crony had goddamn river for the woman who didn't get the COVID vaccine and is pissed about knocking her transplant. You have to get every vaccine before you get your transplant because they immunosuppress you.   Like that's part of the fucking. Anybody who was shocked by seeing that story doesn't know enough about transplants, to know that there is nothing out of the ordinary about it. Sorry. That was a rant. Anyway, like I said, there's a shit ton of people who need kidneys. And every day there's more people who need kidneys.   And everyday there are people who die before they get them. There are three types of kidney donation and I'm simplifying this, but there are basically three ways that one might get a kidney in their body. The first and the most common is by, um, a cadaver transplant. So somebody who died. And they're an organ donor and their organs were fit for transplant.   They go to the list and they see the first person on the list who matches the organ. And then they transplant. Now the cadaver organs are the least likely like you, the outcomes are better if you can get a living donor transplant because living donor transplants. I have not had that timeframe in between when somebody dies and when the transplant goes into the body.   So the organ itself has a longer lifespan. Generally speaking, um, like my sister Amy was told with her living donor transplant from her husband that it could last 30 years, at least with my grandma. She got her cadaver transplant when I got pregnant with cat. So 18 years now, and that is considered to be outstanding for a cadaver transplant, like way longer than they potentially thought it would last.   So on top of that with the cadaver transplant, somebody had to die, which it sucks. Right. But like be an organ, even if you're not willing to be a living donor, be an organ donor. If you're able to, because like I said, so many people are writing and this is just kidneys. This doesn't count. At least kidneys, king, kidneys and livers can get living donors, but not everybody can.   So not every kind of like a heart transplant. You can't give someone a heart as a living donor. Right. Anyway, so then there's living donors, people who donate a kidney, cause you can live perfectly fine with one kidney. So you donate your kit, one of your kidneys to your. To usually someone, you know, whether it's a friend, whether it's a family member, whether it's a person, you know, from the internet named Cindy Guentert Baldo, that's joking.   I swear. Maybe not maybe a little bit, not joking, but like there's a saying we have in the kidney transplant in the kidney community of like share your spare. Right. And those that's the majority of living donations or somebody giving a kidney to someone that they know. The smallest amount of donors are the living donors who donate altruistically.   This is also referred to as non directed donation where you are going to donate one of your kidneys, but you don't know who it's going to. You're just donating because you want to donate an organ. That's what Don darlin did. She donated a kidney, which set off a chain of donations where one person got her kidney, that person had a donor who did not match them.   And then that donor chose to donate their kidney to someone else who also had a donor who then did not match them and see what I'm saying. And from what I understand, the letter that Dorland wrote to. The recipient was not actually to the person who got her kidney, but to the person at the end of the chain who got a kidney.   So it's not necessarily like a totally relevant point, but I just thought I would bring that up. So one of the things that massively enraged me about this story, where, where the joke. About how cringey she was. Well, we should just like, should we donate a kidney? And people like giving her shit for talking about it.   Now I would imagine that if you had not heard about this story ahead of time, there was probably a chance you didn't know, you could altruistically donate a kidney because there is, there's so many things surrounding. Kidney donation and living donor donation. Like if you have somebody in your life who is in kidney failure, then you will start to hear about those things.   But it's not something that really crosses the minds of people who aren't impacted by it. And so, yeah, maybe she was cringy. Maybe she was seeking validation for it, but I'll have to say that that is so fucking. This is a quote from a slate article that I will also link in the show notes because it really, I think clarifies how petty and just like fricking awful.   The jokes that these chunky monkeys were making at Dawn's expense really are to me like how much it, it just enrages me that they turned her into a joke. Just listen to this, this quote, what makes the kidney shortage uniquely tragic is that there is technically no shortage of actual kidneys. Most people have two kidneys, but can be perfectly healthy and live a long life with only one.   There are literally millions of spare kidneys in the United States. Given 35 thousand people are added to the waitlist every year, only 0.1, 4% of our country's adult population or one in about every 7,000 people would have to donate a kidney each year to meet the demand. In this light, there is actually a massive kidney surplus and.   So you may ask yourself, okay, well, if there's so many kidneys, like why don't they get more incentives to people to donate blah, blah, blah. Right. There's a lot of complications that come from that. A, there are health implications. It is a surgery. It's a pretty major surgery as a matter of fact. And. While the outcomes are generally really fine.   Like really good. Like my brother-in-law, brother-in-law's doing great with his one kidney. You know, he had to recover from a major surgery, but th his he's doing fine with his one kidney and my sister is doing great with his other kidney. Right. However, he did have to recover from pretty major surgery and go through the pain and the complications of surgery and the potential.   Shittiness that can come with surgery and everything else. On top of that, there's potential financial implications for somebody who is a living donor. Generally speaking, living donors, medical expenses are covered by the recipient. Like if I get somebody to donate to me, their medical expenses will be covered by my insurance.   On top of that, there are. Um, there are organizations that help pay for things like missing work or travel expenses incurred as well as if the donor, if the recipient is able to help cover that with Jesse. And I hope to help cover that for somebody, if they donate for us. However, there is a, there's a very like shaky line.   That is also involved here because where does helping cover costs turn into compensation? And that begins to like dive into like the ethical and moral dilemma surrounding. Adding incentives to people to be living donors, right? Like there have been suggestions. Like if you donate a kidney to somebody, then you should be, you should get like access to Medicare for the rest of your life for free.   Right. If you donate a kidney to somebody and you ever need a kidney, well, and this is true. If you donate a kidney to somebody and you ever need a kidney yourself, you go right to the top of the wait list. But like, they've talked about offering. Incentives to people through the government, but they usually don't go anywhere because there is a.   This ethical dilemma around offering payment for organs, because you can see where that would open a really, really, really dark slippery slope where like people in poverty selling their organs from, have you ever seen repo the genetic opera like that? Right? There is a big, big. Like waiting pool of shittiness that they don't want to go into, which is why you have to both go through psychological testing as a donor to make sure that you are doing it for the right reasons.   And B there cannot be like any compensation going back and forth between donor and recipient because they, it violates ethics on top of that. We can't like force people to give up their organs cause bodily autonomy, my dudes. Right. So. Any program that there might be to encourage living donation is extremely open to exploitation.   And that's really why there isn't anything like that yet. So the biggest way to encourage living donation, the biggest way to both, but people know it's even possibility that altruistic donation as a possibility is to. Talk about it is for living donors. They encourage living donors to talk about it.   They encourage living donors to tell people about it. They encourage living donors to advocate for it, to go in parades, which is something Don did and got made fun of by the chunky monkeys. Like all of these things, these things that are considered cringe or whatever, like no you to humbly brag about it.   No, no, you really don't know. You should tell everybody about it. Don was doing. What living donors are encouraged to do, which is talk about it to hopefully encourage other donors, whether whether altruistic or directed or whatever, like that's the only real way besides kidney patients. Putting their phone numbers on their cars with their blood types is starting Facebook groups to find donors like kidney patients themselves are already looking for kidneys.   Having donors talk about it is the other way to get people interested and potentially considering it. And that's what she did. And they fucking made fun of her for it. So fuck them. That's basically, if you want to know who the bad art friend is, I don't give a shit who the bad art friend is. What I know is that one person.   Donated a kidney and the other one plagiarized her, at least in my read of the situation. And so honestly, all of the rest of the shit doesn't really matter to me. If they had not made jokes about her donating a kidney and how they thought it was, she did it to be needy and blah, blah, blah. They haven't donated a kidney.   Now. I'm not saying you have to, to be a good person. You really don't, it's your body. And it, like I said, it's not an easy or a non-consequential consequential decision to make, but don't fucking make fun of somebody else for that. Think about the person who got that kidney, who could have been one of the people dying on the waiting list.   Like, fuck that shit. Anyway, that's really what I wanted to say. This, all of this talking 20 minutes of talking, just to say, fuck them. I feel gross that I read little fires everywhere. Now, knowing that the author there is fine dragging somebody through the mud, because she has a friend who made fun of somebody who donated a kidney.   Like it bothers me, you guys. And I know I'm feeling a little petty about that, but you can imagine in my position and in the position of anybody. Who is also waiting for a fucking kidney to see an altruistic donor get made fun of, because she's cringy, like, fuck you. Anyway. Now that I've said all of that, do you still want to subscribe to my newsletter?   Because if you do, you'll get the fuckery coloring. At least in the month of November also, you should check out my Patrion because they're the sponsors of this episode. They get to hear these episodes a couple days early, which I don't know, that might matter to you. Maybe that won't matter to you along with other things, they're actually getting a second fuckery flower coloring sheet as a bonus download in November.   Isn't that rad? Anyway, they're my sponsors for this episode. They're amazing. Check about, oh my God. I almost burped. And I'm gonna keep that in on the podcast because why the fuck not I've already. General people I've been the old kidney patients shaking my fist at the clouds kind of a situation today, but yeah, check them all out.   All the links are in the show notes. And until next time my friends be a good art friend and don't make fun of someone for donating a kidney. And until next time, peace out.  
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    135 | Shit That's Annoying Me

    15:37

    Sometimes I feel like Oscar the Grouch, and today is no different. Today I’m going on a (lighthearted) rant about some shit that’s annoying me. Lighthearted is the emphasis here my dudes. DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop is open! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED Work Planner Setup - https://youtu.be/4dM7YsxI2jo Maintenance Phase Celery Juice - https://maintenancephase.wixsite.com/home/episodes/episode/4cfde6d6/celery-juice Livestream (puke story) - https://youtu.be/mdCd5fS3iZU Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Hello friends. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast today. I'm glad you're here because I need someone to listen to some shit. That's annoying me. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo welcome. If this is your first time here. And do you like what you hear then? I hope you subscribe. We've got new episodes every Monday.   And if this is not your first time here, I hope that you like what you hear and you stick around because that makes me happy quick. And before I get into the episode, I do want to let you know, in case you didn't know already that this week on the 11th, November 11th, 2021 in my Etsy shop, I will be offering a limited run of 2022 calendars, their wall calendars.   They have a mixture of. My fuckery flowers from both series, then old series series one in the new series series two. These will be limited because I can only get so many of them before I lose it. So make sure you head on over there to pick up a calendar or three, they make excellent gifts, blah, blah, blah.   But anyway, I want to make sure to remind you of that because the there'll be dropping on the. If you are on my newsletter, you will get the heads up when they go live. And if you are a patron, your access comes tomorrow, November 10th. So just make sure that if there's something that you're interested in, I don't know how quickly they're going to sell out.   I've never done this before. So you may want to keep your eye on. Anyway, let's get into this because marketing also annoys me. So I've just got a handful of things that annoy me. I told you when I did my like I'm back episode, that I wanted to both handle some spicy topics and some light-hearted topics and talk about things I love and blah, blah, blah.   Well, a combination of lighthearted and spicy is some shit that's annoying me. And I've got a whole list of things that run the. And I just thought I would let you know to see if a they annoy you and B if they don't, you can always yell at me on Instagram at llamaletters, let me know in the stories. So let's just get into it because I love talking about shit that annoys me, apparently that I wonder if there's a personality test that tells you that I don't know.   First of all, is celery juice. I am so tired of seeing on Instagram. I am tired of seeing influencers talk about it. I am tired of seeing it in YouTube videos. I'm tired of it. If you want to have a deep dive on how bunk the whole celery juice thing is now that it's bad for you. It's not, but it's not like it's magical either.   Then listen to the maintenance phase episode on celery juice. They do a great job. I'll leave at link in, the show notes. If you haven't listened to that podcast, a 10 out of 10 recommend. However, my big hatred of celery juice comes from two sort of areas. The first one being like, what the fuck is wrong with just eating celery?   Like I don't even like celery all that much. I like it in soup. I don't really like it on its own. It's too stringy for me, but. There's like a segment of people who think that you have to juice it for it to be good for you, but doesn't that just remove all the fiber? I don't get it. Secondly, a lot of the celery juice, like the people who are enchanted with it kind of use the same language around wellness culture that I find to be really toxic.   And that's going to show up later on this list, but also in some later podcasts, but a lot of it has to do with like the idea of like, Hearing your chronic illnesses and detoxifying yourself. And I'm just going to say that whenever anybody suggests some new trendy thing to cure chronic illness, especially genetic chronic illness, which is what I have, it feels remarkably abelist and it feels really like, uh, I was going to say naive, but I don't think that's the right word.   Just sorta sort of. I don't know, bogus, like fucking no, dude, I have genetic kidney disease, celery juice won't help me. And secondly, anytime somebody tells me they're doing a cleanse or drinking the juice to flux out, flush out the toxins as somebody with failing kidneys. I want to slap them because you know what flushes your toxins, your liver and your kidneys.   So if they're functioning, they're doing it for. You don't need magic juice to do that. And if you're like me and have failing kidneys, Magic juice is not going to flush my toxins. You know what? Well, dialysis, sorry. I did say this was shit that annoys me. So sorry. Celery juice, but I am, I am moving on from you.   Number two, raisins in cookies. Now I know there are some of you who love a good fucking oatmeal raisin cookie, but for me, raisins and cookies are. The most disappointing thing that can ever happen. And the reason that this is like on my mind right now is recently I got surprised the other day thinking I was going to have a delicious oatmeal chocolate chip cookie.   And it was an oatmeal raisin cookie. And I'm sorry, that is not the business. I like raisins. I have nothing against raisins, but not in cookies and raisin bran. Fuck. Yeah, leave my cookies alone. Hashtag. Number three. And this one is actually very, very much relevant to me right now, because I have had to make so many doctor's appointments for both myself and my kid because of my chronic illnesses that have already talked about.   And because my kid has some health problems, we're trying to nail down, hold music. Now I would be fine if a company had like a serious XM station or something, or some kind of. Radio station. I don't know something where the music rotates, but when it's the same song over and over and over and over and over and over again.   And you're on hold for like eleventy million years. It's it makes my brains leak out my ears, like an ice pick to my temple and it's awful. And like, I understand that that's probably less expensive for a company than doing like a radio station, but dear God, dear. Oh. Oh, my God, I just can't. I can't it's it's grading.   Thankfully, at least one of the people that I had to call had the option for you to save your place in line and hang up and they'd call you back. And as much as I hate my phone and ignore it, I tried that and it actually worked. Most of the time I haven't trusted it, but I did try it and it worked. So I may go with that because that might save me from turning into Jack Torrance in Stanley Kubrick's the shining and having all work and no play makes Cindy adult boy, number four, I wrote this out and then the day I wrote this out, it was wrong.   So I'm still gonna tell you it, but. I was kind of shown up by it. And that is that they made the strawberry SAE refreshers at Starbucks seasonal. I have fallen for that with extra water and extra ice because it's too sweet for me. And then they disappeared because it was seasonal, but I don't think it's seasonal now.   I think it might just have been because of supply shortages because they came back. So I don't know. So that may not be accurate. So right now I'm annoyed by the fact that I was wrong.   Next is my seasonal allergies. I thought they would disappear when I removed, when I moved to Denver, because I never had them until I moved to Napa. And Napa is a micro climate and it is known among locals that when you move to Napa, you tend to get allergies, even if you never had them before. And like, everybody I know in Napa would have like the most miserable seasonal allergy situations.   I thought I would be rid of them when I moved, but apparently Napa just like imprinted them on me because I got to Denver and I still have them and it fucking sucks. And I just, I, it annoys me and this is a, should I annoys me? That annoys me podcast. I'm just saying. The fact that my Claritin only takes the edge off.   And the fact that anytime you sneeze or have a runny nose right now in the age of COVID, that everybody looks at you, like you're carrying the plague. And it's like, dude, I have fucking allergies. Like it just it's, it's one of those little things that like, I hated I've always hated, but with COVID it has just gotten more annoying and sure.   It's not as annoying as having COVID, but like, this is annoying shit. This is not catastrophic shit. Right. Speaking of COVID. The next thing that's annoying me is that I bought one of those home COVID tests because one of my kids had some symptoms after somebody at school had gotten exposed and I gave them the test and the test was negative and I was supposed to give them another test in 36 hours.   And I couldn't find it. This annoys me. I still can't find half of the shit in my house because we just moved and I put some stuff away. And now I don't know where anything is. And I know that that will be solved when I start organizing. And now that we live in a bigger house, there's just so many more places for shit to be.   I spent way longer than I needed to looking for the broom the other day, because we have too many closets and I know it's a first world problem, but like it's fucking annoying and referencing that I also can't find my AirPods and I really want them and could use them. I've been doing a lot of things recently where it would have been helpful to have my.   And I don't want to replace them because they're expensive. And on top of that, like I know that the moment I replaced them, they're going to come out with new ones. It's just, I have them there. They work perfectly fine and I just cannot figure out where the fuck they are. And I'm really annoyed by that on a completely unrelated note.   I am very annoyed by my new potassium. So as people who. I have chronic illness or people who take a lot of medications can probably understand. One of the things that can get really annoying is when you've been taking a medication for a long time, and then you change pharmacies or you change healthcare systems, or you change something and the brand manufacturer of your medication.   Especially if you're on generics and so like a different generic company, because there's all sorts of companies that make some of these medications, especially the ones that have lots of generics. I'm not talking about insulin because insulin doesn't have generics. And that's an entire thing that goes beyond annoyance into white, hot rage as this wife of a type one diabetic says, but for me, my potassium.   Has changed. I just, when I made, made the move, we swapped from the Kaiser system to a different healthcare system. And now I'm getting my prescriptions filled at Walgreens and the brand or the generic brand that is making my potassium is different. And for some reason, this new potassium, my gigantic fucking potassium pills that have take three times a day melt in my mouth.   Not in my hand, they start to dissolve the moment they hit my mouth. They kind of crumble when I dropped them into my pill minder, so that there's already little bits of potassium to dissolve into my mouth. And it is bitter and terrible. And I have chronically low potassium, which is really strange for someone in kidney failure.   Like I am, but because of that, I have to take, I have to eat Tassie and rich foods and take hella potassium. And the real thing that makes me sad is that the options that I have. To swap to, instead of this melt in your mouth, not in your hands, potassium are like infusions, which according to my sister, feel like molten lava in your veins or the liquid, which is even gnarlier.   So I'm stuck with it. And it's really goddamn annoying, especially since those pills are so big. I gag on them every time I swallow them and I have to do it three times a day. I am lucky that I haven't barfed on myself. Well, because of that, I have barfed on myself recently. That's an entirely different story.   Number nine is something that has been annoying me for a long time. And I am sort of subjecting myself to it and it still annoys me, but it's my fault because I'm subjecting myself to it. And that is discs for planners. It's helpful to have the disks for my work planner. I can take pages out and write on them.   It's cuter than. Using, um, a three ring binder and I wanted letter sized paper and having like a Filofax type situation for that size. It's harder to find. I love the cover. I love everything about my work planner, but the discs are really pissing me off because even though they're helpful for removing things and whatnot, random shit keeps popping off.   And every time it happens, I curse myself for putting myself in this situation because this is why I don't like this. But I'm gonna keep using them. And so I probably should shut up about it, but this is my podcast. I'm going to do what I want. Right. Number 10, back to the barfing. Nausea is getting worse and worse for me.   It happens when you get further into kidney disease. My sister warned me to keep a extra trashcan with a roll of bags in it, near the toilet for all of those times when it takes you over. And I wish I had known that. After I puked all over myself, I'll make sure to link the plan with me where I tell that story.   If you're really interested in it in the show notes, however, my nausea is getting worse and worse and the Zofran has stopped completely helping and instead just taking the edge off. And I know it's just going to get worse until I get a transplant. I hate being nauseous. You guys, I hate it so much.   Number 11 trader Joe's is discontinuing their curtains from what I was told when I was there the other day. And I just decided I liked them. So I'm bummed. I know this is like the most white girl thing to say about my trader Joe's product. That was discontinued. Trust me. I worked there for 12 years. I had to hear it all, but dammit, this crew Johns are good.   And then finally, the thing that's annoying me the most in the preview. If it's something you're interested in, please let me know in the stories at Lama letters. If you want to make episodes on it, because I'm really thinking about doing it. And that is talking about toxic wellness culture and deprogramming myself from some diet culture.   I have a kid who is dealing with some disordered eating right now, and it is really causing me to take a look at some of the things that I do. And it's annoying the shit out of me. And more than annoying me that I haven't set a better example. But on top of that, I've had some comments over the years, but recently I've had a few more of people being very well intentioned, but completely dismissing my experience as somebody with chronic illness.   And it's just making me more and more annoyed to the point of rage about toxic wellness culture. So if you are interested in hearing a podcast about that, please. Anyway, those are some things that I, that annoy me. I know this is not the most positive episode, but fucks shut. Sometimes shit annoys you. And sometimes you want to get off your chest and sometimes you get surprised by raisins and cookies, and sometimes you puke on yourself and we got to talk about those things.   If you want to share with me something just random, that's been annoying you lately. Let me know in the Instagram stories, just post at llamaletters and tell me about it because I'm curious to see, but the random shit that's annoying. You. Because it's fun for me. Don't forget to check out the Etsy shop on the 11th.   If you're interested in calendars and don't forget to thank my patrons. If you ever see one bop and about because they make these episodes possible. So thank you, patrons, www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo. If you would like to find out more, you know, who doesn't annoy me, you all, and I'm glad that you're here.   So thanks for hanging out next week. I won't be quite as annoyed potential. But until next time, until that next annoying or not annoying time, stay safe because it'll annoy me. If you're not safe and peace out.
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    134 | New Planner Season PSA

    15:31

    It’s new planner launch season and I thought it would be helpful to issue a PSA - Planner (come to your) Senses Announcement. DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed.   NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop is open! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED My Consumerism YouTube Playlist - https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmus5Pc0SfZvLQtie_9bc1RGdUAQV8kKj Planner Peace Skillshare Class - https://skl.sh/2MKRtC3 Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. It is chilly. I'm drinking a cup of tea, which means it's probably new planner season. And so I thought it would be a good time to, uh, do a P S A. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. Thanks for being here. This is your first episode and you like what you hear?   I hope you will subscribe. I put out new episodes every Monday. And if this is not your first time here, welcome back. My dude. I'm glad to see you. You know, in the internet way, planner season tends to come twice a year, new planner season. Now there are some companies that shall remain. But nameless that release planners every five minutes, but in general, for most planner companies, new planners come about twice a year.   Once it's in the may, June, July kind of area with new planners that are academic based, whether they're for students or they're just for people who like to keep an academic year calendar. That was me for a long time. The calendar year, like year planner coincides with the. Right then the other new planner season is in the fall for the new year.   All of the new, this will be the 2022 planters that run from January through December. And we're in that. Now we're in deep in that now, and this may actually becoming a little late for some of you, but as new planners season generally stretches for a handful of months. I figured that it was about time for a quick chat from your internet.   Or big sister, friend, whatever you want to call me, your internet, voice of reason that you can listen to. I want you be able to listen to this whenever you feel like you're getting swept up in new planner season, whether it's right now or next year, the next time the, uh, the jovial planner company releases 85,000 products.   Like if you need it, if you need to hear this, I want you to be able to listen to it. I'm calling this a planner PSA. It could be a like, you know, planner, season advisory kind of situation. I don't know. However we want to call it, whatever, whatever we want to call it, maybe a planner come to your senses and it.   Whatever the case may be. I want this to be something you can listen to when you're feeling the pull of a whole bunch of things and your brain and your mind and your heart and your wallet are all screaming at you, bruh. And you need a little bit of extra encouragement. That's what this is. So let's get started.   Shall we? First of all, this might be the most dangerous time of year for a planet. When it comes to overspending, when it comes to buying shit, you don't need, like, I'm sure there's other dangerous times of year, but as a planner person who purchases planners this time launch time is like the hardest to resist the most fraught time of year when it comes to how you spend your money and what purchases you make.   And often emotions, emotions get pulled into it as well after. You're probably in need of a new planner for next year. If you're an academic person, this applies during the academic launch season, but like in general, right? Like most people right now are trying to figure out what planner or planners they're going to use next year.   And right when they're having this like crisis, this wondering this like vulnerable time when we're like. We're fragile because we're trying to figure our shit out. And then all of the companies come out with all their new shiny things and all of their marketing and all of the influencers and all of the everything.   And it's just bombarding us. You know, that when you're on social media, you start keying all those targeted ads for the new planner. You even potentially thought you might want. And unlike other times, when you might find yourself buying shit, you don't need for no apparent reason other than marketing at this time of year.   The thing that makes us extra vulnerable, extra fragile is that re feel kind of justified, right? Like I know I need a new planner. I know I'm going to need one. So of course I'm going to have to buy one. So I'm justified in buying shit, but eleventy million planners really, really. Are you actually going to use those really?   So like my first thought and my first kind of thought for you is to think about the method of only buying shit on launch day launch day, whenever a new planner launches or a new version or a new edition launches only buy shit on launch day. If, you know, you're gonna to use it, you've already decided, for example, the power sheets launch for affiliates was a few weeks ago and I'm recording this and I bought shit that day.   I don't know if I'm using power sheets next year. I'm in a current planner crisis when it comes to that, but I knew I was going to review them. So I knew I had a purpose for them. Now, at the point, you're going to hear this power sheets launches are already passed, but. Found yourself buying, you know, $60 planner on the off chance you might use it.   That's the kind of buying decision that I want you to try and back away from. If you know, you're going to use them something and then launched it up by the ship, by what you're going to buy. But if you aren't sure don't get swept up in the hype because that's what it is. It's hype. And in 99% of cases, The shit you want is still going to be there in a couple of weeks after you've considered it.   Now that isn't to say that there aren't certain designs or whatever of something that might sell out, but if you don't know you're going to use it, that doesn't matter how pretty the design is. Keep an eye on things in case they're coming close to selling out and really ask yourself if you're going to use it, but don't buy it on launch day.   If you're only curious, because you'll probably spend more money on shit you don't need just from the excitement that is marketing. It's all it is is marketing. In the same vein when shit does launch and you're buying something, let's say we'll use the power sheets example again, let's just say, you know, you're going to use them.   You've used them before. You're going to use them again, buying them as a no-brainer, but then all the accessories are out. Again. Just be very careful there. Don't let the excitement of all the new things cause you to buy shit. You're not going to use. Okay. Um, the reason I keep emphasizing this is because sometimes you have the stuff in your cart and all you need is for somebody to remind you to double-check and think, am I actually going to use this?   Do I actually need this? And that's enough for you to like back out. I just, I hate when people spend money on things and regret it because. We're in a capitalist society and money is a resource that is necessary to exist in this society. And it sucks when you spend it on something and then have regrets, but also there's the, the situation of more shit than you need, which will become more waste or more whatever.   Like it's just, it's perpetuating this like over consumption lifestyle that we're all sort of being exposed to by the media, by social media, by everything. And. You know, little changes. It's not that we're going to change the world by making little changes, but at the very least you might make your life a little less unsettled or uncomfortable or overwhelmed.   My next tip. And this is an important one, especially when you're thinking about launch time and buying your next planner. If you are in a place where you don't really know what you're going to do yet is to do the work ahead of time, start thinking about what it is you think you'll need, not which brand you think you'll need, but what system you'll need.   Do you need a weekly, do you need a daily? Do you do most of your planning and Google calendar and just need something that you want to be able to do? Art or memory keeping or lettering practice or whatever. Don't let brand marketing tell you what you think you need and want actually assess what you've been using.   What has been working, what hasn't been working, so that you have a better idea of what you might be looking for. And then you can narrow things down. For example. Generally speaking daily planning is not for me. I tend to prefer a bullet journal for like rapid logging my tasks for the day and a weekly planner to visualize my week a daily printed planner has never really worked for me, but if the marketing for a new daily planner, like the new Moxy life daily planner really starts to creep into my mind.   I might decide, oh, Hey, maybe I should. That except I know I'm not going to use it because it doesn't work for me. If you struggle to discern what kinds of planners or what systems you might be wanting? I have a Skillshare course called finding planner peace that may help you with that. And I will leave a link to it down below.   It's a Skillshare premium class. If you're not a member and you've never used it before, my link will get you, I think, a free month, right? But like, I just I'm an affiliate, but I specifically designed that class over around how to help you figure out what planner you might be best suited for. And it's not necessarily brand specific, but it will give you some kind of ideas of which way to, uh, which way to turn, check the link in the show notes.   Another tip is to set a budget and stick to it. Like if you say this is how much I can afford to spend on planners and new planner accessories for the next year, stick to it, that will help you a not buy more shit than you're comfortable buying. And B it will make you. Thoughtful in terms of what you actually purchase, because if you're only allowed to spend X amount of money, you're not going to be blowing it Willy nilly on 15 different planter companies coming out with their cool shit, because you might buy something and then regret it.   And the thing you really wanted comes out later. So just set a budget, stick to it, and really like, be considering of how you're going to allocate each of those dollars or whatever. When it comes to influencers and influencer types, if you want to support them. Like me, when you do purchase, look and see if they have an affiliate link, it doesn't cost you anything.   And it helps them, uh, like make a little tiniest that much, but a tiny bit of money on the side, especially if they have helped you figure out what it is you like, like that's one of the things I do appreciate is when. Other people review planners ahead of time. So I can get an idea of what it is that I would like to buy.   And if my whole reason for doing planner reviews is so I spend the money so that you don't have to like, hopefully by me spending the money, you get to look at what it is and make the decision to not get it. And then you're not going to waste your money on it because you are. But if you decide to use an affiliate link, if you want to, if you don't then fucking don't like this, do what you're going to do.   And I'm totally cool with it either way. But on the flip side of that, if the same influencers or influencers in general planner, creators, whatever the case may be, if they make you want to spend all the money without thinking about it, maybe you should mute them during launch season. I've given this advice before and I mean it for me, Unfollow unsubscribe.   The mute is one of my favorite buttons in Facebook and Instagram, because you can shut somebody up for a while and they don't even know you're not going to offend anybody by and following them. They don't know you can't see their shit. And if you want to see it, you can still go see it, but it stays out of your feed.   And I promise you, there are people that I mute during launch season because I am just, I can't handle it anymore. Totally. Okay. And a fantastic tool. If you are a. Avid user of social media, like I am, and you need to get a break from it so that you can make your decisions about things with a little bit more thought.   And finally, I'm going to say this, and for some of you, you may be like, duh, and for some of you, you're going to be like, thank you. But it's an important thing to remember. You do not need all of the things. Most of these planner things are. And you can redate shit. You can go through the effort to re date shit and re and use it and make sure it doesn't go to waste.   But like that sucks, dude. That's a lot of effort. So before you make any planner purchase, ask yourself, will I use this during its intended timeframe? And if the answer is no, are you going to be willing to alter it in order to actually make it work and use it and not waste it? And you need to be honest with yourself when you ask yourself that, because if the answer to that is no.   And I know for me, it is, I can promise you right now that while I will slap date covers down on a planner, I will never read date a planner. And when it comes to undated planners, the jury's out. I generally speaking, I'm not a fan of undated planners, but because I'm lazy. But like, if that's your thing, then that's your thing.   But the question here is if you can take a hard look at this potential, this potential purchase, and be honest about whether the likelihood of you actually using it. That might help you from buying it because you don't need a wall of planners. Yeah. There are people on the internet with a fucking wall of planners.   I have a wall of stuff. I do planner reviews, but like, there are people who are part of affiliate programs are part of like squads or whatever who gets sent all this shit. They didn't have to pay for it. And if they did have to pay for it, there's like a certain level of elite ism that comes with having a wall of fucking planners.   You don't need that. You do not need. My hope for you. This planner season is that you are able to be thoughtful about the decisions that you make to not regret the money that you spend. And you make sure that everything that you bring into your house is coming into your house because it has a purpose.   You got this, I believe it. I think you're going to have a great time this planner launch season. And if you need any extra encouragement, find me on Instagram at Lama letters. I'll fucking encourage you. You got this, make sure that you check out that Skillshare class, if you need some extra help and don't forget to jump onto my monthly newsletter, I'm going to keep reminding you guys about this because I, I am.   That's what I'm doing, right. All of this stuff is in the show notes. Thanks to my patrons for sponsoring this episode. They love it when I do anti-consumer content I'm generalizing, but I think they do. You can check out my Patreon at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more, make sure you listen to this.   If you need an extra kick in your pants, this planner launch season stay safe. And until next time friends peace out.
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    133 | My First Personality Test - DISC?

    18:16

    People have been asking me (for years) about my personality type. What enneagram am I? What other random test situation? I have actually never really paid attention to all that, so now I’m starting a series where I take a personality test and discuss it! Today it is the DISC test, an OLD one from the 1920s mainly used in business. DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop is open! https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED DISC Test - https://www.123test.com/disc-personality-test/ Info on the test - https://www.ionos.com/startupguide/productivity/disc-assessment/ Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. Today is the first of what I think is going to be several personality test episodes. I'm Cindy Guentert-Baldo. And if this is your first time here, welcome, I would love it. If you subscribed and hung out. Hopefully after you're appearing all of this today, you'll be fine with that.   And if this is not your first time, welcome back. If you want to take this test and you haven't before it'll be linked in the show notes, let's get right into it. As a preface. I have had so many people since I've started doing YouTube and everything else. This whole online creator situation, I have had so many people ask me what type of personality I am, what Enneagram I am, what fucking I N G P w.   Five that I am. I don't know. I don't actually do a lot of personality tests because I don't usually have the patience to sit down and do that. I have taken some of, there was one quiz I took a long time ago that maybe I'll try and find again where you're supposed to answer a bunch of questions about your values.   And then they take every all like a hundred and something religions, and then they decide which ones you're the closest to. And I remember doing that in my top three. We're secular Quaker, Unitarian Universalist, which is what I became and secular humanist, which is also what I said that there's that maybe I'll do that one again.   See if it's. Maybe add that in the political test, whatever, but personality test wise, the one or two that I've taken was like decades ago. And so I thought that this would be a fun little segment to have on the podcast every once in a while, because personality tests are in my mind, both garbage and interesting.   So I'm fine with both of those things, right. You should have heard last week's episode. When I talked about the Lula rich documentary. Which is garbage and interesting. Right? Anyway, so I am going to take the test today and then I will report back afterwards. So I'm not going to fill my, I'm not gonna record myself actually taking the test because that could take a long time and it might skew the results.   But I'll talk about the test. I will pause the recording, take the test, and then immediately afterwards report back on what I found and what I think about. Okay. I think that's going to be interesting if you think this is a cool format or a good idea, please let me know at Lama letters on Instagram, let me know in the stories.   If you take the test as well, let me know what you get. I'm so curious. And if you know of personality tests, you'd like me to try. I would love it. If you let me know in the DMS on. Also, just as reminder, if you haven't signed up for my newsletter, it is where I am giving you guys monthly peaks into everything you can reply to it.   And I can take your in your info interest. Can I talk now on which personality test to try or what podcast episodes you would like the info for that is in the show notes and October's freebie is currently available unless it's not October anymore than it might be a different freebie. You'll find out anyway.   Let's move forward. Today's test is an old one and it is the D I S C test. I pick this one because it's a shorter test. It's just, so it's an easy one to start with. Right? The D I S C stands for dominance influence, steadiness and compliance. The test is linked in the show notes. I'm sure there's different versions.   The one that I will be taking is linked. It's like 1, 2, 3 test.com or something it's linked. If you want to take it with me. One of the things I found when I Googled this is some criticism of the test specifically in like corporate work situations. A lot of these personality tests are utilized by companies to, I don't know, psychoanalyze their fucking employees instead of just giving them like better wages.   I don't know. That's not good into like an anti-capitalist rant right now, but I wanted to read you some of this because I think it's kind of enlightening on the test. I got this from a website called  dot com. It's like some. Fucking shit that has a bunch of corporate-y bullshit, but whatever, I thought that the criticism was interesting.   Right? So this is a quote from the website. The DIC assessment is among the most widely used personality tests in the corporate world, but it has been under scrutiny. Critics say that the assessment tool is outdated scientific findings in personality, psychology post 1920. So that's when the test, the test.   Early 20th century, post 1920 are not considered an empirical science-based foundation does not exist. Quality criteria such as validity are values that should be measured, actually being measured and reliability. Our results. The same every time are not fulfilled. The fact that D I S C personality tests seem to make applicable statements can be traced back to the Barnum effect.   According to this, we like to ascribe to desirable widespread or vague statements, although they're applicable to many different. In the last few decades, new assessments and personality psychology have been designed that speak of five key personality types, openness, conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism.   Four personality types alone are no longer regarded as true to our time and quote. That was a lot of jargon. But what I gleaned from that was that a, this test is outdated based on what we know about psychology and. Aside from the fact that like the personalities it's testing for are outdated, the way the test is kind of built is kind of vague.   So it's entirely possible to take it more than once and get different answers. I'm going to take this test now and I will report back on both my personality types that it gives me what I think of the test. And do I agree with this criticism based on my extremely unscientific mind. So let's do quick pause and we'll be right back.   All right. I am done taking the test and I decided to pay for the extended report. For the sake of science. I imagine I'll be doing a lot of that during these episodes, but that's okay because my podcasts are sponsored by my patrons and you should check out www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more anyway, before I let you know my thoughts on the test in both digging into the test a little bit more and realized that I didn't give you a good kind of explanation of what these things are.   Um, and I have little bit more information cause I have this, uh, bigger report that gives you some more info on what the test actually is. I thought it would fill you in on that and then let you know my thoughts on the test and how I scored. So we talked about the four types, right? Dominant, influence, steadiness and compliance.   Well, they have definitions for those dominance describes the way you deal with problems, assert yourself and control situations. Influence describes the way you deal with people, the way you communicate and relate to others. Steadiness describes your temperament, patience, persistence, and thoughtfulness, and compliance describes how you approach and organize your activity, procedures, and responsibilities.   The D I'm going to read from the report. The DIC theory is often visualized as a quadrant where the top bottom and left right sides represent specific behavioral tendencies. People who score high on dominance and compliance tend to be more task oriented, where people who score higher on influence and steadiness are more people oriented.   Those scoring high on dominance and influence are generally more assertive and active. And higher scores on compliance and steadiness give rise to calm and more cautious, cautious behavioral styles. So what they also say is that the dimensions of the DIC are not dependent on each other. So you could score in one of the areas and it doesn't determine your score.   Like if you score high in one area, it doesn't necessarily negate your score in another area. One of the things that they do. And part of the reason I paid for the results is that your test results. And I saw my results. Give you. Like which one you're the highest in, and it shows how you breathe. They all break the four breakdown, but there are 15 profiles that have been identified as a good coverage of the possible outcomes based on your score overall on each of the things and those 15 outcomes in alphabetical order are the achiever, the coach, the counselor, the creator, the enthusiast, the evaluator, the individualist, the inspiration.   The investigator, the objective thinker, the perfectionist, the persuader, the practitioner, the results oriented and the specialist. Um, I don't know which one I am yet because I haven't scrolled down that far before I do. I'm going to give you my thoughts on the actual test that I took on this website. I found it to be.   Really general. I felt like, and I think this is the same in a lot of personality tests, there were the same questions being, or the same prompts being given. Phrased slightly differently. So the way this test ran was that they gave you a series of, I think 28 different little blocks of prompts, and each one has four prompts and you were supposed to pick the one that was the most like you and the one that was the least like you, and they weren't necessarily related to each other.   They were just four things. And you pick the one that was most like you and the one that was least like you. And there were 28 sections of that. The problem I was running in. Was that there were some where I could hardly choose which one was the most like me. And there were some where I didn't feel like any of them were like me.   And so those were the hardest ones for me to answer. Matter of fact, I didn't answer one. I just put the one that was least like me kept going and it wouldn't let me finish the test. The other real issue I ran into with the test. And again, I'm not a psychologist. I don't know any of that shit, but I'm like, The other thing that kind of irked me was that when you finish the test, it takes you to a page to get some more information on you, to help figure it out.   And the first thing it asks your gender and only offers the binary choices of male and female, which as we all know, gender is a spectrum, not binary, but moving forward. So my DIC score I'm scrolling down. So   in order. I scored the highest on dominance and then the next highest on influence the next highest on steadiness and the lowest on compliance. It doesn't surprise me. Now, when I saw the original results before I bought the report, it actually showed it on a pie chart. And the way the pie chart looked was that a little over half of my answers indicated dominance.   And then of the other half that was left, it was like a sliver of compliance and then pretty much equally distributed between influencing steadiness with a little bit more of influence over steadiness. So the next section on the report says your responses indicate that you want to assert yourself and like to take control, enjoy competition and challenge are self-sufficient and individualistic and all go.   Our goal orient. I tend to be direct and positive with people like to sweep people along with your forcefulness are persuasive, especially when seeking help or commitment, get restless and bored when involved in routine and repetitive work and activities need change and variety in your work. And non-work life may be impatient with people who are less dynamic than.   And that I'm independent and uninhibited feel restrained by rules and restrictions prefer to be measured by short-term rather than long-term results and are willing to take an unconventional approach. I tend to agree with probably about three quarters of that. The things I think, where I feel like this is not at least in my understanding of myself.   The biggest things are that I get restless and bored in routine and repetitive work and activities. That is so not true. I am a creature of habit and when my routines and repetitive things are disturbed, I get really, really grouchy. That was the one I think I, uh, I disagreed with the most on this list. I also, I agree with the direction.   And like sweeping people along, but I don't know how persuasive I am. So that one is a question mark for me, but a lot of this is very much me, so I agree with that. So my profile from that list of what was it, 12 mine is the results oriented. And I'm going to read this to you. You are individualistic, demanding and persistent.   You seek out challenging situations and are responsive to competition. You should be able to handle the daily stresses and pressures of work in life. However, when really pushed, you may become rather irritable and fault-finding people see you as a take charge sort of person who is self-confident and strives for results.   I mean, the part that's cracking me up here is the one really pushed. You may become irritable and fault-finding. Yeah. Yeah, that's accurate. Here are some key words that people often use to describe the results oriented profile, demanding direct egocentric self-assured change oriented, frustrated by lack of progress, persistent, determined, stubborn, independent, and quote own person.   Now I kind of take a little umbrage at egocentric, but at the same time, Isn't that something an egocentric person would say, I don't know. Oh, my prime value for an organization, because this is through a corporate website. Is your driving forcefulness and determination to achieve goals? Uh, tactic and strategy for increased effectiveness says, you appreciate need to.   I need to appreciate that some people may not be as dynamic and forceful as you avoid confrontation by developing your empathy and increasing your tolerance. Impose a little extra self-discipline when faced with details and routine work. And see here is again the point where I feel. This isn't exactly me is that, um, I already do avoid confrontation for the most part, because I really dislike it.   I consider myself to be fairly empathetic and, um, like I said, I really like details and routine work, but now this is interesting most, unlike your profile. The perfectionist, the profile most opposite to your profile is the perfectionist. You will most likely not recognize yourself in these descriptions of the perfectionist conservative, very modest, logical, always systematic, factual, non demonstrative, deliberate, careful, precise.   Accurate predictable and controlled. They're not wrong. I pretty much see myself in zero of those.   Whew, non demonstrative, logical conservative. No. Now here's the interesting part. So I'm looking at the appendix here, which gives you a little bit of a description of all of the different ones. And the one that I'm looking at that I feel like might be a little bit more accurate for me, but again, who fucking knows, right.   Is the persuader, which has some. Some overlap. Right. But the persuader is optimistic, enthusiastic, self-confident persuasive, sociable, change, oriented, independent, persistent, decisive, direct, and demanding. I feel like that is a little bit more, a little bit more, uh, accurate to me. I just took the test and that's, that's what it told me.   So do I, do I think that this test is completely on the nose? No, it's a personality test. Like it's full, it's totally like impacted by my decisions. And there may be a point where maybe I'll come back to this in a year and take it again and see if the same thing happens. But overall, I would suggest that it's not completely off the mark.   I feel like there are a few spots where it feels wildly inaccurate for me, but overall it does feel at least somewhat. Reasonable. I don't know. So I would love to hear from you. About not only what your personality not being pleased, do not pay, do not pay for the 1499 additional PDF. Maybe what you can do is if you really want to just take your score and then give yourself a little.   And the grid would need to be divided into four equal parts D and I on the two top left and right. And then see an S on the bottom left and right. And then kind of just fill in sort of which section has as much as it does. Like whichever one is the most, give it like the biggest and you can kind of see how it fits and maybe just Google it.   I just don't. I spent the money cause I can write it off, but don't spend the money. That's ridiculous. Unless you really want to then spend the money. But I'd love to hear if you take this. Tag me in Instagram stories at @llamaletters. And let me know what you got and tell me that you did it. And if you have any specific personality tests, you'd like me to take in the future.   Let me know in the DMS, this was very odd, but whatever, at least it was a short one. I know that there are some longer ones, I guess. We'll see how that goes. Anyway, don't forget to sign up for the newsletter and check out the Etsy shop, check out the Patreon, do all the things, man, do all the things. But at the very least, if you don't want to do all the things, tag me on Instagram stories that you're listening to this because I'm glad to be back.   And the only real way people know about the podcast is through word of mouth. And that is AOK by me. Thank you so much for watching. I promise to knock it to confrontation and until next time friends, peace out.
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    132 | LULAWHA? The LuLaRich Documentary

    33:37

    If you’ve been around the planner world (or shit, the online world) you probably know about LuLaRoe. Amazon Prime released a documentary called LuLaRich chronicling the rise and fall of the MLM - I’ve got so many thoughts! DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. NEWSLETTER https://view.flodesk.com/pages/61525a85337f1c2aacf52f6d Etsy Shop Reopens 10/21/21 https://www.etsy.com/shop/CGBPrints FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED LuLaRich - https://amzn.to/3EWgMbT TFD Video - https://youtu.be/HHK5FuOCGyU The Dream Podcast - https://www.stitcher.com/show/the-dream Inquiries - [email protected]   TRANSCRIPTION Hey everybody. Welcome back to the uncurated life podcast. My name is Cindy Guentert-Baldo. If this is your first time here. Welcome if this is not your first time here. Hell yeah. I'm glad that you're back. Blah-blah-blah let's get into today's episode really quick, but before I do, I want to give you a quick announcement.   How many times can I say quick? And this episode who knows, right? The announcement is that this coming up Thursday, October 21st, 2021, my Etsy shop will be reopening. I will have all of the series, one fuckery flowers, my art prints of realistic flowers with naughty words, hidden in them. All of the series one, the flowers that were in the shop before we'll be back with all prints and postcards available as well as a couple of small, new, like stocking stuffer type items, a few bookmarks and vinyl sticker packs.   You can find the link to it in the show notes. And soon in the next few weeks, I will be updating it with limited edition calendars with series two and series one fuckery flowers on them. And then in later November, there will be the launch of series two, which is. Set up 12 new fuckery flowers with prints and postcards, as well as some bundles of things that will include both series.   So if that is something you have been waiting for, or you haven't checked it out yet, my Etsy shop will be linked in the show notes and you can go ahead and favorite it, do all the things and look for it on October 21st. Now let's get into the episode. We're going to talk about Lula rich today. Why is this relevant to the planner world?   Yes, it's fucking relevant to the planner world. If you don't know why it's relevant to the planner world trust, I will tell you about that. So what is Lula rich? Let's start right. Lulu rich is a documentary on Amazon prime. It just came out well, it came out in September and I binge watched all four episodes of it.   It's about the rise and fall of the multi-level marketing company. They interview current and ex. Retailers or consultants. They're the people that are actually part of the multi-level marketing company. They interview former employees of the home office, the corporate side of it, and most interesting.   They interview mark and DeAnn Stedham who are the founders of the company, as well as some of their family members who were put into high level positions within the company. One of the things that I thought was interesting is that the documentary was made by the same people who made the documentary about the fire festival.   So they have had some experience making documentaries about dumpster fires. So what is LuLaRoe in case you don't know? And if you don't know, I. Remarkably jealous of you. LuLaRoe's a multi-level marketing company. If you don't know what multi-level marketing is, and I'm really jealous of you, it is direct sales is another name for it.   Some people call them pyramid schemes. Although in the U S in the laws, there are very specific rules that govern pyramid scheme. Versus multi-level marketing companies, pyramid schemes are illegal. Multi-level marketing companies are not honestly, I don't really see that much of a difference between the two.   And if you really want an interesting, entire deep dive on multi-level marketing companies, I will recommend the first season of the dream, a podcast. They did a limited series on multi-level marketing. That's outstanding. But in general, multi-level marketing is a business model where there is a company that produces something, whether it's it's essential oils like young living or what's the other one.   I don't remember. There's some other fun. Essential oils. I don't give a fuck or like makeup. Some of the most famous makeup ones are like Mary Kay and Avon. Then there's Amway, which is one of the most famous Tupperwares, also multi-level marketing company, but there's all sorts of them. And during the age of social media, they've exploded because of how social media works.   And Lula Roe really leaned into that. We'll talk about that in a second, but in the idea of a multi-level marketing, is that. There's a company that makes some sort of a product rather than sell that product to stores or sell it themselves like wholesale it, they sell it to consultants, quote, independent consultants who are not employed by the company.   They send a contract with the company, but they're not employed by the company. The consultants buy the products at wholesale and then sell them to customers at re. No in and of itself, that doesn't sound like such a problem, right? Except that a lot, or the majority of multi-level marketing companies, the money is not made in the sales of the product.   The money is made in recruiting more consultants underneath you to then by-product from the company and sell to customers. The problem here is a, if the real money is made through recruiting, rather than selling the product. Then the people at the top make the most money and then, but they have to depend on more and more levels of people beneath them.   Hence the term pyramid scheme. The other problem that you run into is that while they say there's like so many people that you can recruit and blah, blah, blah, if you're recruiting your customer base sooner or later, you don't have anybody to sell to now social media, once again has blown this all up because you can reach out to more than just your, your sphere of influence in like your community or whatever.   But like it, it can, a company can really hit like a level of saturation and that's when shit can start to go a little wonky. Now, if you really want to really delve into like the side of people who have been burned by this, besides watching Lula rich, Google, anti MLM, trust me, you'll find all sorts of.   But we're talking about LuLaRoe. So LuLaRoe is a MLM that sells clothing. It started with maxi skirts expanded in to quote, buttery, soft leggings, and then a whole bunch of other things. The. Clothing was mainly geared towards women. And one of the things, one of the like selling points of it was that they had all of these like wild prints for the fabrics that these clothes were made out of.   And that any given print was only going to be. Into like 3000 pieces and then it would be gone. And so retailers will be getting in there. The consultants will get in their orders of prints. And if you got one of the prints that was like a very popular one, then people would want to shop with you. It also supposedly was going to encourage collaboration with other retailers because people would be looking for certain things.   And if you didn't have it, but you had other friends who were consultants, they might have it. So you could serve your customers that way, which is an interesting way to go about it. Okay. Now, one of the things that was, is pretty painful about Lula Rowe is that retailers, which is what they call their consultants.   Um, don't get to choose the prints. They can pick the styles and they can pick the sizes, the prints, however, we're not their choice. They would not know what they were getting until they open their box, which could be very cool except, and Lula rich really. Demonstrates, this really shows a lot of the evidence of this.   Not all of these prints are nice. I've heard people refer to some of them as Doritos leggings. There is a lot of them where the way the leggings were made, it would look super like a badge or a penis because of just the unfortunate way the pieces were stick together. And as time went on, the prince got more and more janky and more and more not desirable.   And so these consultants would wind up with a lot of inventory that they couldn't sell because it was ugly. And then on top of that, the only way to get better inventory would be to order more and more and more. And you can see where this could become a problem. Now there's two things that really are important to understand about LuLaRoe's specifically one because it's clothing and because it's like meant to be an inventory, heavy business, the initial package.   Is like at least $5,000, you have to spend a huge chunk of money upfront and then continually order more and more you with some multilevel marketing companies, you could get a catalog and sell from the catalog and then order as the money comes in, that would be the least risky way to go about things.   But in LuLaRoe, because you don't know what you're getting until you get it, you literally have to buy a bunch of shit in order to sell a bunch of shit. So there's that the second thing to know about LuLaRoe is that it, it really started in the mid 2010s, I believe, right? As Facebook lives and Periscope and things like that were becoming really big.   So. A lot of consultants started to do Facebook lives. They get their box of stuff. They go live on Facebook in their group or on their page where they had a bunch of potential customers. And then they would just show items and people would comment sold and that's how they would sell them. And this just really blew up and a bunch of other multi-level marketing companies hell or use social media now, too.   But it got very big on Facebook very quickly. And this is where the connection to the planter community begins. So. Around 2016 and I could be wrong. It could have been 2015, but I, my best memory is around like late 2015, early 2016, Lula Rowe sorta started to take over the planter community. It started with a few retailers in the planner world, and then they began to recruit from the planner community.   Now I understand why this is. I'm going to generalize a little bit here, but a lot of people in the planter, community or women, especially back then, a lot of people in the planner community are introverted. I'm generalizing. And there's a lot of them that are moms. A lot of them that they, I w I would, I would say that in, especially in like the circles of planner committee that I've run in, like the PGW kind of area.   There were a lot of people that were kind of ripe for the picking when it came to Louisville road, because one of the things that they did well at the beginning was sell clothing that was comfortable and Dorito his side was not like entirely unflattering. But it was comfortable. I got some, I got the maxi skirts because they were the longest maxi skirts with a nice wide band around the belly.   I'm six foot two. It's hard to find maxi skirts that are actually maxi on me, but the Lula ones I got were, they also had a. Irma. That was like a tunic length top that was long enough to cover my plumber's butt crack, which again is very difficult for me to find because of how tall I am. It's just, it's hard for me to find.   And so there were certain items from LuLaRoe that were just there. We're well-suited for me and I was comfortable in them and I appreciated that. And I wasn't the only one now I also had to get into a little bit of that hunting kind of mindset, because I didn't want any wacky prints. I wanted solids.   And so solids were like a big unicorn, especially black leggings. Oh my God. So hard to find. But so the people who came, who were planned or people who got into Lula Rowe had a really great audience for them kind of already there. So those people, they sold their products to planner. People, built groups from planner people and built their teams from planner.   People. The teams are pretty big and there was a lot of them. And LuLaRoe was everywhere. There were all sorts of people like asking about different groups and blah, blah, blah, but it came kind of to a really frothy head at go wild 2017. And now. So the go wild team, the people that put the, the org, the welfare planners, people that put on the actual conference decided that year, that for the plan Gemma party, they were going to rent the little bar, like, like corridor that's at the, uh, the Gaylord hotel in Nashville that the conference was being held at.   There were these three bars, there was a karaoke bar. There was a kind of a club style bar. And then there was a smaller situation. And what they decided to do was rent all three of those out and like close it off to just the people that were coming to play in JAMA. So Erin Condron sponsored the clubs, style bar, Krissyanne designs sponsored the karaoke bar, but that was the third bar.   And remember, this was the second year of go wild and it was only 700 people coming. So the number of like companies that had. Been willing to put large amounts of money into the conference. We're still very, it was a, still a very short list because it was so new. And so they decided to allow a Lula Roe pop-up to sponsor the third.   Now, um, a lot of this is anecdotal evidence. I don't know all of the details behind any of this. This is just like I said, from my observations, from being in the community and being at the event. But. Uh, one of the groups of consultants in the planner community decided that they would as a team. So they were all on a team together.   They were all in one downline. They decided to pool together and sponsor the bar so that they could bring their shit and put all their clothes out and let consultants shop. And it seemed like, you know, a smart financial move for them because so many people in the planner community were buying shit anyway.   So they were going to have them kind of as a, as a captive audience. Right. There were two controversies that came from this one was that at this point, and even to this day go wild does not have a shopping component to it. Every once in a while, there will be like a place you can buy things or like one.   Opportunity to buy things. But one of the reasons they don't have like a vendor hall or haven't had a vendor hall in the past is because they wanted the shop owners who are part of the community to actually get to come and meet their customers and enjoy the conference, not spend their whole time vending.   I think that's a great idea personally, although I do know some people who get sad that there's not a lot of shit to buy, but personally you get so much shit from the conference. So much swag anyway. That's like, where would I put it? Like I barely have enough room anymore. Regardless. So there was that there was a lot of sore feelings that these people were going to be allowed to sell when selling was not allowed.   Otherwise, the other source of hard feelings was that there were other Lula consultants who wanted to bring their sh who were not in that team who wanted to bring their shit and sell it like out of their hotel rooms. But there was like a band put on that because this team. Had sponsored the bar, they got to, um, have like exclusive rights, again, make sense because they're putting the money into the sponsorship so they can demand that, that happens a lot with sponsorships, you can, and other kinds of contracts, like I've had contracts with people before where I have signed exclusivity with them for a certain thing as part of the contract.   Like it makes sense. But one of the things I saw people bitching about. And it's understandable was that there wasn't an opportunity for them to step up. It was suggested, and then it just happened and other people felt left out of it. I get that when I say bitchy and I don't mean that in a negative way, I actually mean that in a, like it's like they were, they were upset about it.   And I get that. I do understand that I could see both sides of this particular situation. Looking back on it. I'm like kind of grossed out by the whole thing, Maine. Mainly because of my feelings about MLMs. And I have a lot of feelings about MLMs and I'll expand on that in a bit, but like, I think that.   Part of the reason I wasn't. So skeeved out by Emma, the Lula Roe specific MLM at the time was because I had found a couple of items of clothing that worked for me, but I was already getting really kind of grossed out about how it felt like the planner world was becoming like fertile recruiting territory because at the heart of it, multilevel marketing is predatory and that's something that Lulu right shows.   Anyway. So that was the. The situation, I will update you on some of those planner connections as I finished talking about the documentary, but I wanted to give a bunch of context, 17 minutes of context, of both what LuLaRoe is and how it connects to the planter world. So now let's talk about the documentary.   I'm not going to spoil it. You should watch it. I promise you. If you have Amazon prime, you should watch it. It's four hour for, I don't think it's four hours. I don't think they're all an hour long, but it's four parts. Give yourself the time to watch them all in a row, because you may not want to step away from it.   The first takeaway I have what a fucking hot mess, and I'm not even talking about. There's there's two kinds of big, hot messes. There's the hot mess of the clothing. One of the reasons that Lulu burrow began to sink as a, as a company was that the clothing went downhill. The patterns you learn in the documentary, that the people who had to design the pattern.   Unhealthy as somebody who does graphic design and can make repeating patterns like very unhealthy unreasonable quotas, like impossible quotas to make. So that's where like a bunch of plagiarizing came in and a bunch of other garbage and Dorito prints, right. There was also stuff being kept outside. So it was moldy and like wet.   And so consultants were getting nasty shit and the company wasn't helping them with it. So there's that the quality was going down. But then on top of that, and maybe kind of in tandem with that. The way the company was run was a hot fucking mess up Mickey mouse horseshit, right. They hired their chip mark.   And Dan had between them like, hell fucking children, like 14 children or something. There, there, there are latter day saints or Mormons. They between them and a whole bunch of children, including a pair of children who are married to each other fucking glossed right over that. But like, They put their children into like all of the executive offices, despite none of them having any experience at that.   So it doesn't surprise me that a company that grew that quickly, like they show how fast the revenue and the consultants grew. It's like ridiculously fast growth with incompetent people running the company. It was bound to explode at some point, and it just happened to explode. And she sent out shrapnel of stinky leggings and penis crunch.   So there's that right? The second big takeaway was how they portrayed mark and Deanne Stidham, which I actually thought was very. Very clever of them. They interviewed the two of them, the founders of the company in their fancy office. She's wearing like designer heels, looking all like made up and very Tammy Faye Bakker.   And they're sitting there and they're like swab and like answering their questions, all calm and cool and collected. And then they juxtapose the filmmakers juxtapose. With segments from their deposition, from one of the multitude of lawsuits that are against them, which I'll get into in a minute and how the answers they give the interviewers and the answers in the depositions.   Don't always track with each other. It's very, very telling it very much, kind of informs your opinion of them as you're watching the show. The other thing that I found was really, really just both gross and also amusing was them fronting like they're feminists talking about how they're trying to like empower women.   This is a women empowerment company to run your own business and blah, blah, blah. Except it comes out during the documentary that they want to hammer home like traditional gender roles. Like once you get going, you need to make sure your husband is respected. Bring him into the business. Cool with your business, you should find a new husband, but like he still needs to call the shots.   And then they started to talk about like how they wanted it, like have feminine a feminist company, female empowering company. And before DeAnn could answer her husband talked right over her. Like it was a beautiful, I think it's in the trailer. It's a beautiful example of how ridiculous this shit is. Now I felt really like another thing that I took away from the whole documentary was how conflicted I felt about all of the ex consultants that they interviewed, especially the ones who built massive teams.   They had some coaches, which is like the second highest level on the pyramid. And, um, at least two mentors. So that's the highest level that you could reach. And they were talking about their regrets and the way they felt about certain things. And I felt very sympathetic towards them, especially as somebody who like filed for bankruptcy because of an MLM, like I felt sympathetic to them.   But at the same time, I really felt also that except for one there's one exception to it. And you'll know when you watch the documentary, who the exception is based on. The way that she talks about things, but none of them seem to really, they felt awful about their situation, but none of them really seemed to cope or like talk about the fact that they were predators.   Like, if this is what happened to you, what happened to all of the people below you? All of the people, like one of them had thousands of people on her team. Is there remorse. Do you feel bad about it? If you really want a nuanced take like a really good take about this? I would suggest you watch the video on the financial diet channel, where she talks about that.   A link in the show notes. She also has a. Good. She's great conversation about how the only way to change the culture in which multilevel marketing continues to proliferate is that we can't just get mad at the people who run the companies. We also need to get mad at the people who use the companies to make money, like the people who recruit a whole bunch of people.   And where's the line drawn. Like if you recruit one, I think I recruited three people over the course of my time at a multi-level marketing. And does that make me predatory? Compared to somebody who, who recruited like 2,500 people. I don't know. You know, I have no idea. So, so there's that right? Check that video out.   And there was one particular couple who I was really grossed out by, and that was the, I think they're called the . They weren't, they never quit. They were fired from Lula Rowe and they didn't seem to show any. Like I don't, I think they'd still be in it today if they hadn't been fired. And they were like there for sympathy and it's like, I don't feel sympathy for you.   It's hard to feel sympathy for you got fired from something that really sucked. And now you're speaking out against it, but you would still be like playing into the suckiness if you hadn't been fired question mark. I don't know why just look and say, you got to watch the documentary. I'm curious to know.   And then there was an entirely other situation that really is not a multilevel marketing thing, but just a toxic fucking wellness. Diet, I'm really into the podcast maintenance phase. If you haven't listened to that 10 out of 10 recommend. And like, I have been working really hard to try and like deprogram myself from diet culture.   And I'll talk a lot more about that in some upcoming episodes. But the thing that like kind of came out of the blue and I sorta knew about it from other anti MLM stuff I saw, but like the way it was described just really, really got me was the weight loss surgery. Shit.   If you haven't seen it yet, I'm not going to spoil you too much, except to let you know if the talk of like weight loss surgery, and having to maintain a certain physique to be accepted is triggering to you. That is something to watch out for when you're watching this documentary, because it absolutely comes up.   Let's just say that the owners, the owners of LuLaRoe had a fucking life. Group chat to get people to go to Tijuana and get weight loss surgery, and you were pressured to do it so that you can look a certain way, reinforcing certain roles about how somebody should look. It's fucking gnarly dudes, and I'm not going to go too deep into it right now just to say, Hey, watch out for that.   If it's in, it's hard for you and be damn right. But I will say that one of the biggest aha moments that came to me at the end of the documentary. And this brings it back to the planner world. The biggest aha moment to me came at the end from Robert Fitzpatrick. He is an expert on MLMs and he is somebody that they interviewed for the documentary.   And he he's the one who shows up throughout it to explain things about how MLMs in general work. He's actually does a very good job about that as well. So that'll help you if you're still confused when you watch the documentary. I'm also going to read his book soon, and I will be sure to discuss that here.   He said that once an MLM gets big enough, it's damn near impossible to make money when you get recruited into it, because you need to get in early enough. To be one of the people that are higher up in the pyramid, the later you get into it, the more likely it is that you're going to have a hard time finding other people who haven't either heard of it and been burned by it or heard of it and been recruited themselves.   So when an MLM starts to struggle or loses popularity or start sending their consultants, slimy leggings, the people who are higher up in the pyramid, the ones who already have big teams, big. We'll bounce and go to a newer, more up and coming MLM to start the cycle all over again, to get it on the ground floor so that they can build their team from people that they brought with them.   And then shoot up to the top of the pyramid. Now, when he said that my jaw was on the floor, not because this was new knowledge to me, this is not something that I didn't already like, no, but it was the first time that I had really. Wrapped my mind around the fact that a lot of the people who recruited heavily from the planner community when Lula rose started to cruise down hill bounced to another MLM.   And now a lot of them are higher up on the pyramid. There it's a nail Polish company by the way, but I'm not going to, and like I'm not condemning every single person who's in an MLS. I could, but I'm not going to mainly because a blanket condemnation is something that I struggle with, especially with my, like, you, you values that I so have trouble living up to sometimes, but I will say that, like that particular comment it's like you held a mirror up to the planner community and it was an, you could see that exact story play.   And it's still playing out today. It just makes you go. Hmm. Now there's a bunch of other things that this documentary gets into gets into race and how MLMs, especially ones like Lula Roe are. Really geared towards a certain demographic of white women. Who's a good target. Like who's easily recruitable, who are the people that are easily preyed on.   There's a reason that there are a lot of military spouses that get recruited into MLMs because they are looking for like community and you can find one in an MLM until. I don't want to do it anymore, then that community has gone and I can do more, but I'm not an anti MLM podcast, but I could totally do some more episodes on them in general.   And my experience is on them. But I will tell you generally speaking, I have not talked a lot about them in my, on my YouTube channel or here on the podcast, because. I had a, I had a shitty experience that really messed my family up really fucked my life up. And I take responsibility for the choices I made.   I'm the one who decided to do it. I'm the one who spent the money. I'm the one who caused my family to file for bankruptcy because of it. I'm the one who recruited a handful, a couple of people into it. I did those things and the consequences for those things were brought because of my actions. As I look back on it, I was a perfect person to be preyed on.   I was a brand new mom. I was out on disability because of tendonitis. My everything was really hard. We were like scraping by. I was a perfect candidate for it and I can see how I was pulled into it, but I don't like to talk too much about my really strong feelings about MLMs. Because I know from personal experience how touchy and like fraught that conversation is, especially for people who are still in.   And it just makes me extremely uncomfortable to talk about it. It's one of those, like it's like throwing them all to top cocktail and I just, there's all sorts of times, I'm fine to throw the cocktail. And this is one in particular that just is very difficult for me. So I haven't decided exactly how deep I want to get into anti-Muslim.   And it would mainly be on this podcast now on the YouTube channel, just because it's not really related, but like, it may be changing soon. I may be willing to do more depending on how this comes out, but this, this documentary kind of like was a reminder to me of a lot of my feelings and it brought up a lot of other feelings as well.   So I wanted to mention that because it can be a really difficult thing for me to even wrap my mind. Yeah. But, like I said, the documentary brings up all sorts of things about race, about. Income inequality about the role of religion, especially Mormonism in the forming of a lot of MLMs. There's a reason a lot of them have come out of Utah.   Like there's a reason for it. The toxic positivity that like infused. MLM culture, the toxic wellness culture, which is going to be definitely something that's coming up on this podcast in the next couple of months, because it's high on my list of things to talk about. Like there's a lot of things that this documentary touches on, but doesn't really dive deep.   It could have been a lot longer. I would love to see a documentary of this quality made about the MLM industry as a whole. But the problem you run into with that is that the MLM industry has the government in its pocket. There's a reason that it hasn't been regulated and it's not a Democrat thing, and it's not a Republican thing.   It's a government thing. And they're like, you should go listen to the dream for a lot more information about that. But yeah, I just wanted to give you some of my thoughts on it and provide some context because I have seen a lot of people in the planter community talking about wanting to watch this. And a lot of people who were around for that who were like, hell yeah, planner, community LuLaRoe, blah, blah, blah.   And a lot of people wondering what the fuck? Why, why is the planner community? Why are so many people in the planner community? So excited to watch this documentary? I wanted to provide some of that context because I think it really does inform how MLMs can be very, they can be very predatory on groups of people, especially with.   And how the planner community was impacted by that. Anyway, now that I talked all about that, if you have watched it, I would love to hear your thoughts. You can let me know, tag me at Lama letters on Instagram, in your stories. I'd love to find out your thoughts. And, uh, also keep an eye out for my Etsy shop reopening this Thursday, the 21st, which is not a multi-level marketing company.   I make these prints and then I sell them to you. And I will not recruit you to sell them to someone else because they're fuckery flowers, not fuckery business practices. Also, if you haven't signed up for my newsletter yet the October freebie has started to go out. I'm so sorry if you were not able to get it earlier, but you should get it by now.   If you start to sign up for it, there will be a new one in November. All of this stuff is linked in the show notes as always. This is sponsored by my patrons. They are fucking rad. They. Support me in everything I do. And hopefully I have not pissed too many of them off with any of my recent episodes. I guess we'll find out won't we on the Patrion page, you can check it out at www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo to find out more as always take care of yourselves.   I'll see you next Monday. And until next time, my friends peace out.  
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    131 | Shit I'm Excited About Fall '21

    14:28

    I’m taking a spicy takes break (a poet!) and talking about some shit I am really looking forward to in the next few months. Movies, winter, etc. SO EXCITED!   DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED Dune (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/3gQhEEv Fire And Blood (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/3DElv1f The Eye Of The World (first book in the wheel of time - affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/3BvrfZq Rad and Happy Planner - https://radandhappy.com/collections/planners Silk and Sonder - https://www.silkandsonder.com/   Inquiries - [email protected]
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    130 | High School Bullshit

    17:16

    This episode is kind of a part two to my last episode (129) - we’re going from paying influencers to high school bullshit in the planner community. Or at least ONE aspect of that. More to come in the future on this topic I think!   DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED Planners And Wine - plannersandwinepod.com MyraPlansIt - https://www.instagram.com/myraplansit/ Queen Bees and WannaBees (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/38N8PY1 Queen Bee Moms and KingPin Dads (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/3DCmdwb   Inquiries - [email protected]
  • The Uncurated Life Podcast podcast

    129 | Paying Creators

    28:55

    Should brands, even small ones, pay creators? Does being paid or receiving free product make a review less trustworthy? I chat about these things today on the podcast in light of the recent drama in the Happy Planner community involving the HP Squad selection process.   DISCLAIMER Colorful words may be used. don't be alarmed. FIND ME ON ALL THE THINGS Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/cindyguentertbaldo YouTube - https://youtube.com/c/CindyGuentertBaldo Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/llamaletters/ Discord - https://discord.gg/Rwpp7Ww Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/llamaletters/ Website - www.cindyguentertbaldo.com STUFF I MENTIONED Planners And Wine - plannersandwinepod.com MyraPlansIt - https://www.instagram.com/myraplansit/ Inquiries - [email protected]

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