The Nut Farm Podcast

Some people go to therapy. Some people meditate. And some people bring a shock collar to their podcast. Guess which ones we are. This week on The Nut Farm, we’re taking a trip down memory lane with the movies that raised us, questionable childhood decisions, and the social etiquette violations that make us want to throw hands. We also get a little deep about self-worth, spirituality, letting go of control, and learning to live in the present moment. Because apparently we contain multitudes. And then things get electric. Literally. One of us discovers a new way to feel alive. The other nearly needs medical attention just watching. Salty takes, roasted nuts, and absolutely no adult supervision. Welcome to The Nut Farm. Where personal growth and poor decisions coexist. 🖤🥜 Disclaimer: Please don’t try the shock collar stunt at home. We’re here for the laughs, not the life advice.

This week on The Nut Farm, we’re serving up salty takes, questionable life advice, and a whole lot of chaos. We’re talking Pokémon obsessions, raising kids with main character energy, why school might be overrated, and the life lessons sports actually teach. Gretchen gets deep about self-worth, success, and learning to feel good enough without constantly chasing the next big thing. But don’t worry, we don’t stay emotionally mature for long. Somehow, we end up discussing gentle nipples, aggressive loofah habits, Halloween madness, an Amazon driver flood rescue, luxury lifestyles we’ll never understand, and our upcoming debut at Phoenix Fashion Week with G Soul Co. Throw in a little casino talk, some questionable parenting commentary, and a Pokémon card that personally offends us, and you’ve got another perfectly unhinged episode. Sensitive souls. Salty mouths. Absolutely no filter. Welcome to The Nut Farm. 🖤🥜

WE’RE BACK, WITCHES! 🐈‍⬛🎃 Season 4 is officially here, and we’re celebrating Halloween the only way we know how: dressed as a cat and mouse, ripping Pokémon packs, and talking about randomness. Turns out one of us isn't good at conversing while ripping packs. Insert cricket noises. This week, Gretchen and Missy are serving up everything from nostalgic Hocus Pocus moments and an actual fire at G Soul Co. to a potential zombie sighting and our very detailed apocalypse survival plan. We’re also addressing the internet trolls who think Pokémon cards are turning our children into gambling addicts. Because apparently having fun with your kids is controversial now. Add in some questionable comedy, Phoenix Fashion Week adventures, the emotional roller coaster of parenting, holiday expectations, and Gretchen’s completely unsolicited mental health assessments of the Phoenix Suns, and we’re right back where we belong. Oh, and did we mention we’re manifesting a $1,000 Gengar? Same nuts. New season. More chaos. Grab your broomsticks, hide your wallets, and welcome back to the mother freaking Nut Farm.

SEASON 3 FINALE: We’re Going Out With a Shock. ⚡️🥜 Season 3 is officially in the books, and naturally, we’re going out exactly how we came in: unfiltered, slightly unhinged, and one questionable decision away from The Nut Farm. This week, we’re talking Pokémon obsessions, fart swirls, executive muff energy, and why motherhood should come with a warning label instead of a Pinterest board. We get real about intrusive thoughts, the messy side of parenting, manifestation, and the importance of finding joy in the things that make absolutely no sense to anyone else. We also have some salty takes on policing women’s bodies, a little appreciation for the good men out there, and a brilliant idea for keeping our energy up before TV appearances. Spoiler: it involves a bark collar. From meaningful conversations to potential electrocution, this finale has it all. Thank you for surviving three seasons of our chaos. We’re just getting started. Where the nuts are roasted and the takes are salty. 🥜

This week on The Nut Farm, we accidentally invent “rusted nuts,” celebrate a huge full-circle education moment, and immediately derail into Pokémon drama. We recap the Target Pokémon event that promised family fun and delivered scraps, debate whether “kiddism” is a real form of discrimination, rip a few packs, and discuss the very important art of maintaining the qi (chi) of your trade binder. Then things take a turn. Blood moon water. Period chemistry. The return of the full bush. Living your own muff truth. Pickle demanding a game of hide-and-seek. A Toxtricity pull. Taylor Swift. And a photoshoot waiting in the wings. Basically: personal growth, Pokémon, period power, pets, pop culture, and absolutely no ability to stay on topic. Welcome to The Nut Farm.

We started with salty cakes and rusted bolts and somehow things got worse from there. This week, we investigate whether childhood turtlenecks are responsible for adult trauma, uncover a senior-living motor scooter crime wave, and discuss what happens when you accidentally flash your husband while he’s on FaceTime with a customer. Spoiler: prep the PR team. Then Pokémon gets REAL. Two kids. Two packs. Two number-one chase cards pulled at the exact same time. Tears are shed, parenting decisions are questioned, the universe gets involved, and a new family law is officially established: if you rip it, you keep it. Plus Gretchen’s emotional-support Pokémon binder, $16 claw clips, subconscious abundance, hair extensions, Lizzie Borden, questionable TV recommendations, buku bucks and our continued attempt to become wildly successful without knowing exactly what we’re doing. Healing. Parenting. Pokémon. Boobs. Personal growth. You get the gist. Welcome back to The Nut Farm.

Gretchen and Missy are back on the farm, serving roasted nuts, salty takes, and several personal vendettas. This week, they investigate the psychological chokehold of Pokémon cards, decide Burning Man sounds like sensory hell with better outfits, and relive the heartbreak of stale egg nachos. Gretchen channels her most supportive baseball-mom energy, Missy discovers that accountability is beautiful—but apparently optional—and one mysterious Nextdoor post sends the entire neighborhood into battle without providing a single crumb of context. Plus: impossible professors, live-music overstimulation, questionable piercings, and the enduring consequences of giving Gretchen a nine out of ten. Embrace the chaos and stay out of the mother-freaking Nut Farm.

Welcome back to The Nut Farm Podcast, where we serve roasted nuts with a side of salty takes to help you embrace the chaos and stay out of the Nut Farm. This week, Gretchen and Missy somehow travel from psych ward sweatpants and hot crotch buns to marriage, motherhood, sobriety, creativity, religion, racing, Facebook Marketplace negotiations, questionable childhood drive by's—and a rehomed Goldendoodle who may or may not have catfished the entire internet. Gretchen has a milkshake-related realization that maybe her husband is actually teaching her how to soften and be a better spouse. Missy realizes the same thing while making Adam negotiate Pokémon cards with a stranger on Facebook for two straight days. Then things get a little deeper. The girls talk about the idea that artists don’t need drugs or psychedelics to access creativity—the story, pain, struggle and lived experience were the creative fuel all along. They get into what happens when we’re willing to sit in discomfort instead of numbing it, and why some of our best growth comes from pushing past the place where we’re comfortable. Naturally, none of this stops them from discussing Nate the Hoof Guy, whether we’re currently living in hell, psych ward merch, prostitution as a childhood teaching tool, and the woman who thought she adopted Dolly Parton but apparently came home with Jolene. Deep thoughts. Questionable transitions. Zero judgment. Just another day on The Nut Farm. 🥜 Subscribe, comment, and tell us: What part sent you straight to the Nut Farm this week?

This week on The Nut Farm, we’re once again proving that absolutely no topic is safe from the spiral. We start with a Pokémon vending machine, 37 ripped packs, zero self-control and children who have officially become card-opening employees. From there, somehow, we make our way through Phoenix Fashion Week, creativity, mental health, OCD, intrusive thoughts, faith, ancient Egypt, Cleopatra, pyramid conspiracies, aliens, Bigfoot and the people we’d interview if we could talk to literally anyone—dead or alive. Then things get even less organized. We’ve got baseball drama, the delicate tap dance of parenting tweens, scary movies our nervous systems simply cannot afford, Executive Muff business casual, zombie-apocalypse survival plans and a proposed toxic-goo potato cannon. So basically: Pokémon, pyramids, psychos, Jesus and zombies. Just another day on the farm.

New intro. No show sheet. Absolutely no plan. Welcome back to The Nut Farm. This week, Gretchen and Missy are flying blind and somehow end up everywhere: debating which childhood movies emotionally damaged us, mourning the loss of Dolly, living vicariously through kids getting the ultimate Diamondbacks experience, and surviving a G Soul Co. launch while dressed for anything except the Arizona heat. Then things take a turn at Target, where Pokémon restock day becomes a full-contact emotional sport, Eli starts calling out grown men for hoarding tins, and complete strangers restore a tiny bit of our faith in humanity. Jacko makes a surprise appearance, Card Fellas gets some well-deserved love, and apparently The Nut Farm has officially made it because…the internet trolls have arrived. From Pokémon justice to criminal speeding, Papa Bear energy and the realization that maybe this podcast is supposed to be shorter, we’re serving roasted nuts with a side of salty takes to help you embrace the chaos and stay out of the mother freaking Nut Farm.