Let Them: How to Handle Difficult People & Take Back Your Peace and Power

Today, Mel is digging into The Let Them Theory in a brand-new way – and answering the #1 question she’s been asked since the book became an international sensation with 10+ million copies sold: How do you use The Let Them Theory with the people you love who also frustrate you, worry you, disappoint you, or are just plain difficult?It’s one thing to say “Let Them” when someone cuts you off in traffic or an annoying stranger gets under your skin at the store. But what do you do when it’s someone you care about – your parent, your partner, your child, or your closest friend?  There has to be an easier way.Today, Mel will show you that easier way by helping you see where your power really is.Mel is walking you through a relationship-changing 3-part framework she’s never taught on the podcast before, one that will help you stop wasting your energy trying to control what you can’t so you can protect your peace and finally take back control of what you can.Using real questions from listeners, Mel will show you exactly what to do when someone you love won’t take care of themselves, seems unmotivated, judges you, controls the mood in every room, or just keeps disappointing you.You’ll learn:   -The 3 mistakes that are making your relationships stressful and frustrating -How to stop someone’s behavior from controlling your mood  -What to do when you want someone to change more than they want it for themselves   -How judging, pressuring, and trying to motivate someone can make things worse -The dangerous trap of thinking “they should know better” and the question to ask instead -How to love someone who is hard to love without losing yourself in the process By the end of this conversation, you’ll know exactly how to handle your most difficult relationships – with less stress, more confidence, and a clear path forward.People only change when they’re ready to change. But you don’t have to wait for that to happen to make your own life a lot easier.For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.    If you liked this episode, listen to this one next: 4 Signs of Emotionally Immature Parents & How to Heal.  Mel also wants to tell you:Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morningJoin 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspirationThe Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTubeConnect with me on InstagramFollow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and moreFind some daily positivity on my TikTokWant zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This episode is a master class on how to live an incredible life.In one of the most powerful conversations ever recorded on The Mel Robbins Podcast, Mel sits down with someone she has looked up to for more than four decades: Oprah Winfrey.Mel first started watching Oprah on local television, before The Oprah Winfrey Show was nationally syndicated. Through every chapter of her own life, Mel has returned to Oprah’s work for perspective, encouragement, and direction.This is more than an interview for Mel. It is deeply personal. Now you get to hear the questions she has wanted to ask Oprah for years.Oprah starts this episode by saying, “I want everybody to know that you have the power to fulfill the fullest expression of yourself as a human being.”She is teaching you how to do that today. Oprah shares what she learned, growing up feeling unloved and “red dirt road poor” in Mississippi to extraordinary success. She discusses painful mistakes, difficult family relationships, and moments when she ignored her own intuition and paid the price. What she reveals is surprisingly simple: You already have an internal GPS. Oprah will teach you how to hear it, and find the courage to follow it. In this episode, you’ll learn:-How to recognize the thread of purpose that has been running through your life all along-Why intention changes the way you experience your work, relationships, and choices-The single question Oprah asks when something in her life is not working-Oprah’s best advice: “You are allowed to change your mind,” and what happened when she ignored it-What to do when something painful or unfair happens and you have to figure out how to move forward-Oprah’s life-changing definition of forgiveness-The “10-gallon versus pint-size” lesson that helped her heal her relationship with her mother-The single spiritual practice Oprah comes back to again and againIf Oprah Winfrey could sit beside you and help you think through the biggest questions in your life, this is the conversation she would want you to hear.This conversation will help you come back to your center and look at your own life differently.Start paying attention to the life that has been speaking to you all along. There is something in this episode for wherever you are in your life right now. This is a must-listen episode.For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.Mel is going to Oprah Winfrey’s AHA at Sphere Las Vegas! And she’s thrilled to share that Oprah has given listeners of this show early access to tickets for the event with code MELAHA.This presale is from Wednesday, September 23 at 10 AM PT to Thursday, September 24 at 10 PM PTUse presale code MELAHA to purchase tickets HERE. If you liked the episode, check out this one next: How to Master Your Emotions & Never Get Angry or Bothered by Anyone Connect with Mel:  Order Mel’s product, Pure Genius ProteinGet Mel’s newsletter, packed with tools, coaching, and inspiration.Get Mel’s #1 bestselling book, The Let Them Theory Watch the episodes on YouTube Follow Mel on Instagram The Mel Robbins Podcast Instagram Mel's TikTok Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This is one of the most eye-opening conversations Mel has had on the podcast.Today, Dr. Jonathan Haidt joins Mel to explain what constant quick dopamine is doing to attention, motivation, confidence, and mental health - and why the impact looks very different in boys than it does in girls.This conversation could not be more timely.Meta recently agreed to a landmark $17.1 billion settlement in a major case accusing the company of endangering children by designing its platforms to be addictive to kids and teens. And, today, you’re going to hear from one of the experts, Dr. Haidt, whose groundbreaking research helped shape that case.Like Mel, you may have heard about how deeply social media has impacted girls - intensifying anxiety, social comparison, sexualization, and self-harm.But Dr. Haidt, a social psychologist, professor at NYU Stern, and author of the #1 New York Times bestseller The Anxious Generation, has a new warning: boys are being affected in a very different way.Stop and think about what boys have sitting in their pockets all day long: a video game arcade, an endless stream of short-form videos, sports betting, and instant access to pornography.Dr. Haidt says to think of it like this:Imagine a boy or man you love sitting at the bottom of an ocean while thousands of fishing hooks drop down around him. Every hook is baited with something engineered to grab his attention.A new video. Another level. A shocking image. A notification. A chance to win.Over time, that constant stimulation can make ordinary life feel painfully slow.And this isn’t just about young people.If you have a son, brother, boyfriend, husband, or young man in your life who seems stuck, checked out, or like he’s lost his drive, you need to hear this conversation.Most importantly, Dr. Haid, gives you a way forward. He is here not only to educate you but also to share the specific changes you and the people you love can make - starting right now - to take back your attention, motivation, and focus.In this episode, you’ll learn:-Why young men can start withdrawing from school, friendships, dating, work, and real-world goals-What social media does to girls during puberty-Why shallow online connection is replacing deeper friendships-Why Dr. Haidt recommends no social media until 16-The household rules he recommends for sleep, screens, and bedrooms-Why long-form stories are different from endless short-form content-How to help a struggling young man change without shaming him-Why small changes, social support, exercise, and real-world activities can help rebuild motivation-What research shows can happen after just one to two weeks of reducing social media useIf you’re seeing someone you love lose motivation, withdraw, or struggle with social comparison or insecurity - or if you’re noticing any of this in yourself - this conversation could change everything.Anyone who follows the two-week protocol Dr. Haidt shares today can begin retraining their brain and improving their motivation and focus.For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.  If you liked the episode, check out this one next:  The Science of Self Control: Find Motivation, Build Willpower, and Increase Your FocusConnect with Mel:  Order Mel’s product, Pure Genius ProteinGet Mel’s newsletter, packed with tools, coaching, and inspiration.Get Mel’s #1 bestselling book, The Let Them Theory Watch the episodes on YouTube Follow Mel on Instagram The Mel Robbins Podcast Instagram Mel's TikTok Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You don’t have to wait for your life to get easier to start enjoying it.Today, Mel sits down with Dr. Kelly McGonigal, a renowned health psychologist, award-winning Stanford University lecturer, and bestselling author whose work focuses on stress, resilience, and joy.She’s here to show you how to feel more alive again by making 7 small shifts.And you already have everything you need to get started.Dr. McGonigal will walk you through your body and brain’s built-in resources for joy, connection, hope, and courage, and show you how to put them to work.Your muscles, for example, are like a pharmacy inside your body, releasing “hope molecules” when you move. And you don’t have to crush a workout to get started. A walk with your dog or a little dancing in your kitchen counts.One of Dr. McGonigal’s biggest insights: You need joy precisely because life can be hard. Those moments of laughter, closeness, and pleasure give you reasons to keep going, and you can learn how to create more of them.And you can practice these mood-boosting shifts on your next walk, between errands, or while spending time with someone you love. You’ll learn:–What joy really does for you and why your brain needs it –How your muscles can make hope – seriously–How to make stress your friend and use it to your advantage –How to use a favorite song to shift your mood and get yourself going –How to turn a meaningful memory into courage you can use today –How to train your attention to notice more of the good around you –3 research-backed sources of hope you can tap into when you need a lift You have not lost your ability to feel joy. And you don’t have to wait for it to find you. You’ll leave this conversation with small things you can do today to feel more like yourself, connect with people, and get more enjoyment out of the life you’re living.For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.  If you liked this episode, listen to this one next: How to Stop Negative Thoughts & Reset Your Mind for Positive Thinking. Mel also wants to tell you:Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morningJoin 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspirationThe Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTube Connect with me on InstagramFollow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and more Find some daily positivity on my TikTokWant zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This episode is a MUST-listen.If you’ve ever felt behind, scared, stuck, or doubting yourself, you need to hit play.Today, Mel sits down with someone who has been a mentor from afar for more than 12 years. Mel says she would not be where she is today without the person sitting across from her.For more than a decade, Gary Vaynerchuk has been one of Mel’s biggest inspirations - and in this conversation, he is here to challenge you to stop making excuses and start changing your life.Gary is one of the most successful entrepreneurs and creators of his generation, a six-time New York Times bestselling author, and the force behind VaynerX, VaynerMedia, and VeeFriends.If you’ve been sitting on an idea, watching other people do the thing you want to do, worrying about what people will think, or telling yourself you’re too late, you need to hear this.Gary will challenge the way you think about fear, regret, comparison, confidence, your career, other people’s opinions, and the excuses that are keeping you stuck.You’ll learn why the people you listen to shape who you become, why your embarrassment can become your advantage, why peace of mind matters more than status, and why one action could change the entire direction of your life.Gary also shares his advice for anyone who wants to start a business, change careers, put themselves out there, or finally take the risk they’ve been thinking about for years.His message is simple: there is something you are amazing at - and the longer you sit around watching everybody else do it, the more it costs you.You’ll also learn:- What your algorithm reveals about who you are- Why you need to start living your life with your funeral in mind- The 3 words that are keeping you stuck- Gary’s #1 tip if you’re unemployed or looking for a new job- How to stop blaming your parents for your circumstances- How to build self-confidence and let go of your need to be accepted- Why peace of mind is the secret to a rich lifeThis conversation will push you to stop waiting for the right time, stop letting other people’s opinions control your decisions, and stop living in a way that leaves you saying, “I wish I…”By the time it’s over, you’ll know exactly what you need to do next - and you’ll feel inspired to go do it.For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page. If you liked this episode, listen to this one next: What Makes a Good Life? This Study on 26,000 Regrets Will Guide You for the Rest of Your LifeMel also wants to tell you:Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morningJoin 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspirationThe Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTube Connect with me on InstagramFollow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and more Find some daily positivity on my TikTokWant zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode, you’ll learn how to stop doubting yourself and get anything you want in life.Mel is thrilled to introduce you to her incredible guest today – someone she’s admired and followed for years, and who is here today for YOU.Benny Blanco is one of the most successful and sought-after music producers and songwriters in the world and one of the defining hitmakers of the 21st century. Benny is a 12-time Grammy-nominated songwriter and producer with 29 #1 hits and 19 songs that have over a billion streams on Spotify.But, Benny didn’t start his impressive career with everything figured out. He didn’t grow up with money, some magical level of confidence, or everything figured out.He built his career by showing up, failing, getting rejected, trying again, and learning through experience.Today, Benny reveals what most people never see: the rejection, the fear, the self-doubt, and the countless moments when everything could have fallen apart.And he will show you the life-changing tools and strategies that have helped him push through nonstop rejection and setbacks.Benny has also written a fantastic brand-new book called “F*ck Failure” – which happens to be exactly the message he’s here to share with you today:Every single failure is leading you somewhere, even if you can’t see it right now.Your life can look entirely different a year from now. If you want the dream job, true love, unshakeable confidence, better friendships, or more happiness, Benny wants you to know there’s one rule:Keep showing up. In this episode, you’ll learn: -The simple mindset shift Benny uses to erase failure and keep moving -Why you’re only one small move away from changing your life for the better -Why waiting to feel ready is a losing game -The wild story behind a #1 hit that almost never happened, and why it proves you can’t give up -How to stop letting self-doubt make your decisions -How to keep showing up when you’re exhausted, embarrassed, or convinced you have no idea what you’re doing -How to face the fears you’ve been avoiding for years -How a list Benny made before he started dating his wife, Selena Gomez, can help you stop settling in your own life This conversation will make you rethink every failure, every rejection, and every excuse you have been using to stay stuck.  As Benny will show you, failure doesn’t have to break you. It’s the very thing that can make you unstoppable. If he can turn his failures into hits, you can turn yours into the life you’ve been wanting to live. For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.  If you liked the episode, check out this one next: A Process for Finding Purpose: Do THIS to Build the Life You Want  Mel also wants to tell you:Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morningJoin 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspirationThe Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTube Connect with me on InstagramFollow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and more Find some daily positivity on my TikTokWant zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Why are you bloated all the time? Why can certain foods suddenly make you feel terrible? And what is actually going on inside your gut when nothing you try seems to work? Today, Mel is joined by Dr. Rajsree Nambudripad, MD, a board-certified medical doctor specializing in integrative gut health and integrative medicine, who has spent years helping patients uncover what’s really behind their most stubborn symptoms.  This conversation will change the way you understand your gut – and reveal a simple 4-part protocol for getting to the root of what’s making you feel so bad so you can feel your best again. Dr. Rajsree covers it all: IBS, bloating, SIBO, constipation, diarrhea, leaky gut, histamine intolerance, low stomach acid, reflux, food sensitivities, and more. And she explains the surprising ways your gut can impact your energy, anxiety, focus, sleep, skin, weight, metabolism, blood sugar, and thyroid health. You’ll learn: -The 4 systems that control your gut health – and what happens when even one is out of balance -2 steps you can start taking immediately to improve your gut health -What causes bloating and how to stop it fast -The 3 main symptoms of IBS and what they may be telling you -What histamine intolerance is and how it disrupts your “gut garden” -The surprising connection between your gut and your thyroid -The Hashimoto’s symptoms your gut may reveal first -How exercise can help reverse insulin resistance -Why your “acid reflux” may actually be the opposite problem If you’ve been told “everything looks normal” but you still don’t feel normal – or you’re tired of guessing which food, supplement, or symptom to chase next – this episode will help you understand what your body may be trying to tell you – and what to do next.For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page. If you liked this episode, listen to this one next: #1 Dermatologist: The Ultimate Skincare Routine for Amazing Skin. Mel wants to add:Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morningJoin 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspirationThe Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking aboutWatch the episodes on YouTubeConnect with me on InstagramFollow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and moreFind some daily positivity on my TikTokWant zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

There’s someone in your life you wish would change. You’ve pushed, reminded, and given advice. You’ve had the same conversation over and over.  And somehow, you’re still stuck in the same frustrating cycle of fighting, nagging, lecturing, and hoping they’ll finally do something differently.  There is a better way.   In today’s conversation, Mel sits down with renowned behavioral scientist and award-winning NYU professor Dr. Dolly Chugh to unpack the surprising science of why people resist change and what really works.   You’re going to walk away with some of the most powerful, research-backed tools Dr. Chugh teaches at NYU – tools that will change how you see difficult people, frustrating relationships, and your own ability to influence how others behave.   You’ll learn:  -The 3 things that really do help when someone you love won’t change  -The simple question to ask before giving advice – so it doesn’t backfire  -The 4-option question that reveals what someone needs from you in a difficult moment  -The relationship tool that keeps small problems from turning into 10-out-of-10 fights  -How to tell when “helping” someone is keeping them stuck  -The 2 “bodyguards” in your brain that explain why you know better but still don’t do better  -Why your brain can fight change even when you desperately want it  -The surprising role “unlearning” plays in changing a habit or behavior  If you’re exhausted from trying to change someone you love, this conversation will give you a different way forward – starting today – that feels lighter, more hopeful, and extremely doable. Your relationships will never be the same. And neither will you.  For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.  If you liked this episode, listen to this one next: How to Become More Confident, Influential, and Communicate Better With #1 Harvard Business Professor Mel also wants to tell you:   Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morning Join 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspiration The Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTube Connect with me on Instagram Follow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and more Find some daily positivity on my TikTok Want zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-free Disclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Today is Mel’s 30th wedding anniversary. And she couldn't think of a better way to celebrate than to have a sit down conversation with her husband Chris about the lessons they've learned along the way. This episode isn’t about the highlights – it’s talking about the hard lessons that have shaped their marriage these last 30 years. Mel and Chris unpack the years where they felt more like roommates than a married couple and they share stories from when stress got the best of them.  They get into how resentment and bitterness created a distance that kept growing, and how they found their way back to each other. They talk about what they wish they knew sooner and the expert advice that has helped them the most. Mel and Chris also break down their relationship truths into small, actionable things you can do to make your relationship stronger today.  In this episode, you’ll learn: -How to tell when stress has turned your partner from your favorite person into the person you blame. -Why resentment, criticism, silence, and shutdown can become a cycle that quietly pulls couples apart. -What “normal marital hatred” means and why your partner can trigger old wounds you have never fully dealt with. -How to soften during conflict instead of hardening, attacking, or retreating. -The simple rituals Mel and Chris use to rebuild connection, including notes, touch, walks, shared meals, and weekly calendar check-ins. -How to know whether your relationship has the foundation to grow with you through decades of change. Whether you are newly in love, decades into a marriage, going through a rough patch, or wondering if your relationship is going to make it through a rough season, this conversation will give you a more honest and useful way to think about lasting love.  Because the truth is, a strong relationship isn't built by avoiding the hard seasons. It’s built by learning the lessons from them and finding your way back to each other when those seasons come.  For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.  If you liked the episode, you should check out these ones next, both of which were mentioned on the podcast: James Sexton: The Most Eye-Opening Conversation on Marriage & Love You Will Ever Hear (From #1 Divorce Lawyer) Terry Real: Married, Dating, or Single: The Best Relationship Advice You Will Ever Receive Mel also wants to tell you:   Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morning Join 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspiration The Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTube Connect with me on Instagram Follow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and more Find some daily positivity on my TikTok Want zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-free Disclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Learn how to truly help someone you love.  When someone you care about is going through a difficult time, you can make a meaningful difference with a few simple words.  Today, clinical psychologist and three-time New York Times bestselling author Dr. Lisa Damour teaches you how to offer the right kind of support for your kid, partner, or friend without panicking, taking control, or trying to fix everything.  You’ll learn 3 questions that help you understand whether someone needs to vent, needs more support, or may need professional help.  Dr. Damour also explains why painful emotions are not always a sign that something is wrong, how to recognize when coping has become harmful, and why giving advice before understanding what someone needs can backfire.  This episode is one of Mel’s favorite conversations on The Mel Robbins Podcast, and she’s bringing it back with a brand new introduction and new insights for right now. In it, Mel gets personal about supporting her husband through depression, parenting teenagers through intense emotions, and the mistakes she made when she tried to solve every problem.  In this episode, you’ll learn: -The exact words to use when someone shuts down or pushes you away -Why the advice you give can make someone feel worse -How to respond when someone is drinking, using substances, self-harming, or avoiding life -How to listen so the person feels supported -The simple question to ask when someone is venting -How to stay calm when someone you love is overwhelmed -The 3 questions to ask when someone you love is struggling -How to tell the difference between normal stress and a serious mental health concern -The two warning signs that someone may need professional support -When and how to ask directly about suicide or self-harm -How to suggest therapy without making someone feel broken By the time you finish listening, you’ll know what to say, what not to say, and how to show up for someone you love. For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page.  If you liked the episode, check out this one next: How to Motivate Yourself (and Others) to Change Any Behavior Mel also wants to tell you:   Try the 23g protein shot I drink every single morning Join 2 million readers loving my weekly newsletter - full of tips, tools, and inspiration The Let Them Theory: read the book everyone’s talking about Watch the episodes on YouTube Connect with me on Instagram Follow the show’s Instagram for clips, behind the scenes, and more Find some daily positivity on my TikTok Want zero ads? Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-free Disclaimer Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.