The Line has a Podcast

Jimmy and Alyssa kick off this chaotic episode by wrestling with their studio’s new soundboard, patron intros, and the eternal question: why does it always look like Jimmy’s doing something weird with his hands on camera? From there, they spiral into all the reasons adulthood feels like a social handicap when you can’t eat pizza, drink, or even have caffeine without asking for peppermint tea like a Victorian ghost at a coffee shop. They dive deep into a now-viral Christian influencer who posted a video “praying” over his wife’s PMS and her productivity while she held their baby, instead of, you know, actually helping her. Alyssa walks through the prayer, the backlash, the follow‑up video where the wife insists she asked for the prayer, and then lays out a brutal but practical list of all the ways he could have actually supported her instead of setting up a tripod and posting content. Jimmy unpacks how men convince themselves they’re “not emotional” while being constantly driven by anger and entitlement, and why women are forced to master emotional regulation just to survive in society. From there, things escalate into a full rant on Kevin O’Leary: his environmental-science-flexing data center in Utah, his “poverty inspires motivation” takes, his obsession with millennials’ lunches, and the boat crash where his wife killed two people and walked away with a three‑day license suspension while the victims’ kids got only a small settlement after fees. Jimmy and Alyssa tear into how the legal system and civil payouts work one way for regular people and another way entirely for multi‑millionaires who misrepresent numbers, get sued, and still walk away rich. They then pivot to the collapsing 250th anniversary celebration: artists dropping like flies after realizing the event was quietly tied to the Trump administration, leaving the lineup dangerously close to just Flo Rida and Vanilla Ice. Jimmy and Alyssa drag Trump’s boomer‑era obsession with comparing his crowds to Elvis, his plan to paint the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool bright swimming‑pool blue, and his desire to build tacky permanent monuments so future generations will be forced to look at his architectural ego trip. They also touch on Trump storming out of interviews, falling asleep in meetings, and the broader disintegration of the MAGA base. Along the way, there’s a detour into UFC staging a giant spectacle, Trump’s reported financial interest in the company, and his Eiffel Tower comparisons. Alyssa dishes on Kevin O’Leary repeatedly using his environmental degree as a rhetorical shield while ignoring the consensus of his peers, and Jimmy fantasizes about what it would look like if billionaires actually had their taxes raised and their rockets – like Jeff Bezos’ Blue Origin launch – kept exploding.

Jimmy's away and the girls have fully taken over, and honestly? The show has never been more chaotic, more funny, or more real. Promise and Alyssa kick off episode 107 of Calling It Now by tackling the big questions nobody else is asking: Can you stay married to a Trump supporter? What does the couples therapy show on Paramount Plus say about politics being "just politics"? And why — WHY — is the one place MAGA men suddenly want gender equality in the military draft? The hosts open the phones to anyone brave enough to call in and explain why women should want to live in Trump's America, why abortion should be banned, or why Christianity is good for women. Spoiler: the MAGA guys mostly just lurk in the chat calling them fake feminists… and then don't call. But the conversations that DO happen are fire. A thoughtful caller named Will opens up a fascinating discussion on crystals, skepticism, and mental health, and whether you can use "woo-woo" tools while still being a rational atheist. Chris sparks a deep dive into how to be a better thinker, the difference between wanting to be RIGHT versus wanting to find the TRUTH, and whether social media is rotting all of our brains (yes). Then James calls in to debate abortion, immediately asserts it's murder, and… drops the call. Twice. Devin calls in as a Trump voter and gets into a detailed, surprisingly civil abortion argument with Promise, including bodily autonomy analogies, vasectomy hypotheticals, and the 9.2% increase in maternal mortality in abortion-ban states. Someone even brings up artificial wombs. It's a full episode. Plus: Promise's book is officially out and Alyssa cried when she got her copy. They celebrate Pride Month and break down why rainbow flags literally cannot turn anyone gay. And in the Patron bonus, they play "Would You Rather," talk about moving across the world, and reveal which one of them would swap wardrobes with Bad Bunny.  

Episode 106 is HERE and we are SO BACK!! After a couple of weeks off, Jimmy and Alyssa are diving headfirst into the absolute chaos that is American politics right now. But first: Jimmy's hardware mute was bypassing his soundboard the ENTIRE TIME (a violation of privacy, honestly), Alyssa debuted a new gothic window tattoo, and we learned her wedding ceremony was exactly five minutes and fifty-five seconds long. We are truly so back. Then we get into it. The federal government has subpoenaed leftist streamer Hasan Piker over a trip to Cuba - and the most unhinged part? Liberals are cheering it on. Jimmy goes OFF on the liberal habit of embracing fascism the moment it targets someone they don't like. We break down the difference between liberalism and socialism, why the DNC failed to run a real primary, and how a dual-income household losing one salary in today's economy can completely spiral. The cost of living breakdown (rent, electricity, water, trash, gas) is enough to send anyone into a rage spiral. We also cover the shooting near the White House, Trump's suspiciously routine third MRI, his net worth doubling in the first year of his second term (that's 10,000 years' worth of the salary he "donates"), and Mike Johnson whining that senators can't live on $174K a year. Jimmy's counter-offer: triple the salary, ban all lobbying and insider trading forever. Then it's Ashley St. Clair/Saint Clair - former MAGA influencer turned whistleblower - exposing the coordinated talking-point distribution group chats inside the MAGA influence machine, her ambiguous non-denial about sleeping with Elon Musk, the rumors about Elon's "broken PP implant," and what the whole thing reveals about how the right builds a propaganda cult while the left keeps trying to fight it with half-measures. We close with Thomas Massie threatening to read the unredacted Epstein names on the House floor if the DOJ doesn't release them, and Jimmy's very reasonable question: why are you threatening when you could just… do it?  

This week on The Line Has a Podcast, Jimmy and Promise open the phones with one challenge: Tell us one real way MAGA is good for women. What follows is an absolutely unhinged two-hour journey through bad-faith debate tactics, recycled talking points, and callers who cannot, under any circumstances, answer a direct question. First up: Jackson/Mark from Alabama/Colorado, a troll caller who changed his name and location between episodes, tried to straw-man feminism, invoked trans people when asked about 50/50 equality, and got roasted off the call. Then comes John from Arizona, who voted MAGA three times, says he supports the nuclear family, but can't name a single policy — just keeps circling back to trans athletes, women's bathrooms, and Islam. Jimmy runs a live poll mid-call to find out if he was being incoherent (93% of 500+ viewers said no). Promise systematically dismantles John's argument that "protecting women's restrooms" is a pro-woman policy, pointing out it's actually butch lesbians and trans men being attacked in bathrooms under these laws. Then a 17-year-old from Texas calls in and nearly avoids detection before praying that his mom gets brain cancer if he's driving, all in the name of liability waiver comedy. After the chaos, Donovan from North Carolina brings a thoughtful conversation about anti-theism, atheism labels, and how religion functions as a mind virus around skepticism. Jimmy shares his own journey out of faith and talks about why progressive Christianity may be a stepping stone, not a destination. And finally, a messianic Jew named Sarah tries to tell Jimmy that everything on the channel about Christianity is wrong, gets stumped on the direct Hebrew translation of Genesis 2:17, and gets offered a free copy of Jimmy's book.  

In this week's episode, Alyssa and Taylor are back and somehow finding the humor in the absolute dumpster fire that is current events — while also getting real about some deeply alarming stuff. First, the serious: the Supreme Court rules that Louisiana must redraw its congressional map to create a second majority-Black district. Alyssa and Taylor unpack what this means for voting rights, gerrymandering, and the broader conservative agenda to roll back progress made in the 1960s. They connect this to Christian nationalism, the Joel Webin crowd that wants to strip women and minorities of the vote, and the disturbing silence of some on the MAGA side since Trump posted that Jesus/doctor AI image — including Alyssa's own MAGA aunt Kathy, who has gone suspiciously quiet. Then they pivot to the "silly" news: Trump's face might be going on limited-edition passports to celebrate America's 250th birthday (yes, really), and Taylor nearly had a meltdown rushing to renew hers before it happened. They discuss Trump's obsession with putting his face on everything — coins, statues, banners — and why his supporters' devotion is like nothing we've seen in modern political history. Riley Gaines enters the chat: she posted a TikTok complaining about her postpartum hospital bills while holding her baby — only to end the video by crediting Trump for pushing the hospital transparency act. The internet had thoughts. Alyssa and Taylor dig into the healthcare hypocrisy of the MAGA right and Taylor makes a genuinely compelling argument for why anti-government conspiracy theorists should actually WANT universal healthcare. Erica Kirk is in her Dark MAGA era and Alyssa and Taylor break down the bizarre video, the strange poster, the grifter energy, the fake casket photoshop, and why Charlie Kirk was never really about dialogue — just gotcha clips against college students. Jimmy Kimmel also makes an appearance — because apparently comedy is only legal when THEY think it's funny. Plus: Taylor is obsessed with ripping Pokémon cards, Alyssa is watching beige-house Amazon haul girls as a form of therapy, Dead Horse Bay may contain radiation but Taylor is going anyway, and Alyssa once followed debate star Tilly on Instagram and has never recovered from the honor. Bonus show on Patreon: YouTube guilty pleasures, Victorian fashion history, trend forecasting, and why the Pearl debate was Alyssa's personal Super Bowl.

Episode 102 of Call the Line brings Jimmy Snow and Alyssa Ljub together for one of the most chaotic, hilarious, and genuinely important news breakdowns they've done yet. First up: Jimmy recaps the debut of DualLogs, the show's new live debate format and it did NOT go smoothly for the other side. We're talking a debate opponent who couldn't figure out Zoom, a co-debater Jimmy is calling "Old Racist Gandalf" (a hoarder who literally flosses on camera mid-debate), and a guy who thought walking outside and seeing prices was sufficient evidence for a macroeconomic claim. Oh, and someone tried to blame Jimmy for their own stream key error. Then we get into the weekend's biggest news: the assassination attempt on Trump at a ballroom event, and the flood of conspiracy theories claiming it was staged. Jimmy makes a passionate, well-reasoned argument for why that take is not only wrong but actively harmful and why resorting to conspiracy thinking makes us look exactly like the MAGA crowd we criticize. The manifesto, Trump's meltdown on 60 Minutes where he screamed "I'm not a pedophile," the man who kept eating during the gunfire, and Pete Hegseth "manflexing" his way through a ballroom — all of it is covered in glorious, unhinged detail. From there, Jimmy floats a theory that Tucker Carlson is positioning for a 2028 presidential run, does a developing Tucker Carlson impression, and raises serious questions about whether single-issue anti-Zionist voters would fall for a white nationalist populist just because he opposes Israel. AOC's political future gets the full analysis treatment too. Alyssa shares her experience being on The Circle with Scary Spice, Jimmy reveals a secret woodshop project, and the episode wraps with a Canadian caller named John who claimed to be 6 feet tall, got offered $500 to prove it on camera... and hung up. Classic John.

Welcome back to The Line Has a Podcast with Jimmy Snow and Alyssa Ljub — Episode 101! This week is an absolute packed episode full of news, laughs, and some truly unhinged moments. We kick things off with Jimmy's unboxing of a new PTZ robot camera for his secret woodworking channel — yes, it's happening. Then we dive into the week's biggest stories: 🌪️ Tornadoes & Why They're Basically an American Exclusive — Did you know over 80% of documented tornadoes hit North America, and most of those hit the U.S.? Jimmy breaks down the science (Rocky Mountains, pressure systems, Coriolis Effect) while sharing his very real, very severe tornado phobia. And yes, pooping in traffic also came up. 🗺️ Virginia's Gerrymandering Referendum — Virginia voters approved a new congressional map that could flip seats blue — and one conservative judge is desperately trying to block it. AOC said "wah wah," Democrats grew a spine, and the hypocrisy of the GOP's anti-gerrymandering tantrum is laid bare. 📊 Trump's 600% Math (It's Not Math) — Donald Trump keeps claiming he cut prescription drug prices by 600%. The problem? That's not how percentages work. Elizabeth Warren grilled RFK Jr. in a Senate hearing. RFK tried to explain it. It got worse. Jimmy breaks it all down with the patience of a saint who is barely holding it together. 🤖 The MAGA AI Catfish: Emily Hart — A 22-year-old medical student in India created a fake blonde MAGA nurse named Emily Hart — big patriotic energy, AI-generated photos, a FanView page — and openly bragged about scamming "super dumb MAGA guys." This is at least the third time this has happened. There was also Jessica Foster. There was an OnlyFans. There were feet. 🔭 Palantir's Terrifying Manifesto — Peter Thiel's surveillance empire just released a manifesto basically arguing that the world needs AI weapons NOW and Germany should stop being limited by having been Nazis. Employees inside Palantir are reportedly asking if they're the bad guys. (They are.) 💊 Trump Reschedules Cannabis — It's a good thing! Cannabis has been moved from Schedule I to Schedule III, meaning it's no longer classified as more dangerous than heroin. Democrats promised this for years and didn't deliver. Trump did it, probably to win back Joe Rogan. We give credit where credit is due — and then immediately contextualize it. Plus: Girl Math explained, "Yesteryear" (the trad wife time-travel book Anne Hathaway just bought), R. Kelly's sentencing, The Boys series finale hype, AI spotting cancer 5 years earlier than humans, and a debate about whether liking girls is actually really gay when you think about it. Subscribe to The Line Has a Podcast on YouTube, follow on Spotify/Apple Podcasts, and support us at patreon.com/calltheline for ad-free episodes and bonus content!

Episode 100 is HERE - and it went absolutely nothing like we planned. What started as a chaotic YouTube live stream malfunction turned into the most unhinged, emotionally raw, funniest, and somehow deeply insightful episode in the history of The Line Has a Podcast. Jimmy, Promise, and Alyssa stumble through a broken intro, a pee break before the show even starts, and then quickly devolve into one of the most awkward yet hilarious live moments the show has ever produced - all before getting to a single news story. When things finally settle, the crew covers a packed news slate: Kash Patel's seemingly inevitable exit from the FBI, the Obama x Zeran Mamdani event and what it means for left-wing politics, Zayn Malik punching Louis Tomlinson into a concussion (yes, really), the Hitler-Trump reincarnation theory, and a deep, nuanced discussion on cheating, consent, and rape culture that doesn't pull any punches. Also: Jada Pinkett Smith "humbling" Will Smith, why 62 million hits on a CSAM site should terrify everyone even if the number is wrong, and YouTube watch time vs. subscriber counts explained in a way that actually makes sense. Promise also drops in to remind everyone to pre-order her book Gospel of Lies - available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and through your local bookstore. This book belongs in the religious section of every bookstore, and if you need more motivation to pre-order it, just do it out of contempt for religion. Jimmy pre-ordered two copies (one for Luthien). Take the hint. This is episode 100. It's messy. It's real. It's exactly what this show has always been. Subscribe, leave a review, and join the Patreon at patreon.com/calltheline for the extended episode and bonus content.

The big story: CNN recently exposed a global online "Rape Academy" operating through a site called Motherless - a platform hosting tens of thousands of videos of women being harassed, drugged, and assaulted, alongside boards where users openly share rape "tips." The story went viral when it was reported that 62 MILLION MEN visited the site - but that number isn't right. It was 62 million hits, not 62 million individual users. And Jimmy is deeply frustrated that instead of moving forward with how horrifying the actual problem is, the entire conversation has devolved into a misinformation fight between people who should be on the same side. Jimmy and Alyssa dig into why accuracy matters - even for the left. Even when it's uncomfortable. They explore rape culture, coercion, consent education, STI disclosure, and why every man in America has at some point been taught something that could have made them a danger to someone. Alyssa brings her full sex educator energy and absolutely delivers on the most important parts of this conversation. Also on this episode: Turning Point USA (or as Alyssa calls it, "Tee Pussay") couldn't fill a mid-sized arena for JD Vance and Trump, and then tried to blame it on "security threats" - until the Secret Service publicly said no such threat existed. Jimmy explains why JD Vance could NEVER do what Trump does and why the cult factor is the whole ballgame. The CDC is on its FOURTH director since last summer. Jimmy roasts RFK Jr.'s qualifications (being jacked is not a medical degree, people). Alyssa clocks that RFK looks like "a hot dog." Dave Chappelle is seemingly trying to distance himself from the right wing's weaponization of his trans jokes - and Jimmy has a hot take about whether we should give him space to grow. Plus: Pete Hegseth quoted Pulp Fiction as the Bible, good fake Bible verses from the live chat, Taylor Swift discourse, Gen Z not calling their senators, Elon Musk's baby mama exposing MAGA influencer operations, and the Sinclair Group's local news script problem. Oh, and Jimmy shows the live audience a massive mystery bruise that might be "a gay nation's flag" on his arm.

Welcome to a historic episode - this is the FIRST EVER LIVE recording of the podcast, and things got chaotic, unhinged, and absolutely real from the jump. Buckle up. We open the show on Lebanon - a story that has been almost completely erased from the news cycle despite Israel launching Operation ETERNAL DARKNESS (yes, that's real, no we're not joking) - a campaign of over 100 strikes in a single night on a population that was supposedly under a ceasefire. We break down why this ongoing violence is being ignored while pundits obsess over Democrat drama, and why the hosts are genuinely losing their minds over the media's collective short attention span. Speaking of Democrat drama - we cover the Eric Swalwell sexual misconduct and rape allegations in full, including what the corroborating evidence looks like, why this case is being taken seriously, and what the resignation from both his gubernatorial campaign AND Congress means for accountability in politics. We also talk consent culture, power dynamics in the workplace, and what "believe women" really means in practice - not just when it's politically convenient. Then we pivot to Trump posting an AI image of himself as Jesus, picking a fight with the Pope, and getting his McDonald's DoorDashed to the White House. We tie this to the broader Christian Nationalist project and what it means that he's now openly positioning himself as a messianic figure. Viktor Orbán just lost his election in Hungary - and we explain why that actually matters for America, especially since JD Vance was literally on stage with him last week. What does it mean when the authoritarian playbook fails in the place where it was written? We've got thoughts. Plus: Justin Bieber brought a laptop to Coachella, Kanye is filling stadiums, Chris Brown still exists, Katy Perry has a sexual assault allegation, the weather apps are broken (thanks NOAA cuts), gas is $80-$88 a tank, and we watched a Netflix documentary about a horrifying FLDS cult and cannot stop talking about it.