The Connection Code with Rachel and Jeana

Remember when having a friend group felt effortless? There was always someone to grab dinner with, a group chat full of plans, and maybe even a standing softball game or BYOB night. So why does finding—and keeping—that kind of group feel so much harder as an adult?In this episode of The Connection Code, Rachel and Jeana explore the magic and the messiness of friend groups: what brings people together, what pulls them apart, and what it takes to keep showing up for one another as life changes.They talk about the challenges of distance, busy schedules and group chemistry; the role of the “social chair” who keeps everyone connected; and why shared activities can make friendship easier. Jeana also shares what it’s been like to build new connections after moving to Michigan, while Rachel reflects on the friend groups she’s loved—and the heartbreak of watching one fall apart.Plus, they get into the ideal size for a gathering, the dynamics of couple friendships, and a conversation about money, friendship and whether two friends need to sit together on a flight.Whether you’re missing an old group, hoping to find a new one, or wondering how to keep the people you love close, this episode is for you.Media:What Is the Ideal Size of a Get-Together? — the evidence brief drawing on the Canadian Social Connection Survey. Expecting Together — the prenatal education and community program we share in show and tell.Eventually Ticketing — our season sponsor - use code CONNECT10The Instagram post where Adam Grant talks about friendship group size here

What’s the worst that could happen? For Rob Katz and Kevin Boehm, a four-hour conversation over coffee turned that question into the beginning of Boka Restaurant Group.This week, Rachel and Jeana welcome restaurateur Rob Katz for his first podcast interview—and a candid, funny conversation about taking chances, building trust, and making people feel seen. From arriving in Chicago with $1,200 to discovering hospitality during an unexpected bartending shift, Rob shares how relationships shaped his path and why a lasting business partnership starts with complementary strengths.We talk about why the customer isn’t always right, how Rob maintains close friendships without social media, and the unexpected joy of finding a new crew later in life. Plus: raising thoughtful, hardworking kids, asking questions even when you feel inexperienced, and a few memorable encounters with very famous restaurant guests.Before the interview, Rachel and Jeana reflect on the risks that changed their own lives. Afterward, Jeana brings The Five Star Weekend to show-and-tell, sparking a conversation about girls’ trips, blending friend groups, and remembering who you’re there to support.Media:Rob Katz’s official bio Boka Restaurant GroupGingie — the restaurant Rob specifically invites listeners to visit. The Five Star Weekend on Peacock The Five-Star Weekend by Elin Hilderbrand — the book behind the adaptation.

A diploma doesn’t come with instructions for making friends, navigating workplace expectations, or walking into a room full of strangers. So where do we learn those things?This week, Rachel and Jeana welcome Heather Redisch, creator of Adulting 101 Masterclass, for a conversation about building confidence and connection through the everyday experiences that stretch us. Heather shares what she’s learning from coaching Gen Z, why managers should say the unwritten rules out loud, and how parents can help their kids build independence without smoothing away every challenge.We talk about giving yourself time to settle into a new city or job, why one meaningful connection makes a networking event worthwhile, and how small, uncomfortable moments become opportunities to grow. Plus, Rachel and Jeana reflect on advice they’d give their younger selves—and share why ordinary errands are better with friends and putting our phones away can help us be more present.Whether you’re starting your adult life, raising someone who is, or navigating a transition of your own, this episode is a reminder that you don’t have to have everything figured out to take the next step.Media mentioned in this episode:Adulting 101 MasterclassHeather's Instagram: @adulting101_masterclassHeather's Adulting 101 Masterclass podcastthe book Anxious GenerationPriya Parker's new book, The Art of FightingEverything is better together - The American Time Use SurveyThe University of Chicago's Train StudyRead Phoebe Bridgers' phone-free event policy here

What’s the difference between collecting contacts and building real relationships?Award-winning communications executive—and lifelong super-connector—Jon Harris joins us to share what more than three decades of bringing people together has taught him about curiosity, generosity and the relationships that remain long after jobs and titles change.Jon opens up about the difficult childhood that shaped his commitment to helping others, why he believes the best networkers give without keeping score and what he has learned about asking for help during a professional transition of his own. He also introduces us to the Truffle Club, the trusted community of communications leaders he created during the pandemic, and reminds us why we should never let someone’s title stop us from saying hello.Plus, Jeana and Rachel debate the increasingly popular wedding-day Irish goodbye and reflect on Dolly Parton’s legacy of generosity, joy and making the world a little brighter.This episode is sponsored by Eventually. Visit eventuallyticketing.com/the-connection-code and use code CONNECT10 for 10% off your first year.Media:Jon Harris: LinkedIn and Instagram @jonjayharrisDolly Parton’s Imagination Library: Learn about the book-gifting programCoyote vs. Acme: Official movie site and trailerDare to Serve by Cheryl Bachelder hereSocialWorks: Chance the Rapper’s Chicago nonprofit

What does it mean to love a place deeply and know when it’s time to leave?New York Times bestselling author and Pulitzer Prize finalist Xochitl Gonzalez joins Jeana and Rachel for an expansive conversation about the places that make us, the people who remember our earlier selves, and the courage it takes to enter a new chapter.Xochitl reflects on Brooklyn as both a hometown and a living archive. She also talks about writing Last Night in Brooklyn as one final love letter to the place that shaped her. She shares what decades-long friendships have taught her about grace, why closeness doesn’t always require constant contact, and how pre-digital friendship allowed people to become part of a community without feeling watched.She also opens up about beginning her writing career in her 40s after years as a luxury wedding planner, the way class can narrow our sense of what’s possible, and why we should periodically reconsider our own “aperture of opportunity.” Plus, Xochitl talks manifestation, intergenerational mentorship, the connections she still hopes to make, and learning to trust that the road we started on isn’t necessarily the one we have to stay on.Before the interview, Jeana and Rachel share moments when an improbable future felt inevitable. And in Show & Tell, they consider children’s autonomy online and whether we should ask permission before sharing photos of the people we love.Media in this episode:Xochitl Gonzalez’s websiteLast Night in BrooklynOlga Dies DreamingAnita de Monte Laughs LastNeed Blind: A Memoir of Class and Climbing in AmericaXochitl’s SubstackXochitl on InstagramBilly Joel: And So It Goes — the documentary that led Xochitl to a remarkable new connection. “Robby Hoffman Will Always Feel Poor, No Matter How Rich She Gets” — the New York Times interview Rachel references. Eventually Ticketing — use code CONNECT10 for 10% off the first year.

People-pleasing can look like kindness—but is it actually bringing us closer to one another?In this episode, Rachel and Jeana examine how people-pleasing shows up at work, in friendships, in romantic relationships and even in hospitality. Inspired by Adam Grant’s writing on the subject, they explore the fear of disappointing others, why saying no can feel so loaded and how trying to earn someone’s approval can create an “authenticity gap” in the very relationships we’re hoping to strengthen.They also discuss rejection as data, the difference between caring for someone and managing their feelings, and why clear communication may be one of the kindest relationship tools we have. Plus: a simple daily journaling practice, an invitation dilemma involving a Mother’s Day brunch and the question we can ask whenever we feel ourselves slipping into people-pleasing mode: Is this actually bringing me closer to this person—or am I simply trying to avoid discomfort?Media mentioned in this episode:“The Truth About People Pleasing” by Adam Grant — the newsletter that inspired the conversation and includes the Kristen Bell example. "I Got Rejected 101 Times” by Emily Winter — the essay Jeana references about intentionally becoming more comfortable with rejection.“I Got Uninvited From Mother’s Day Brunch Because I’m Not a Mom” from Kramer & Jess — the call-in segment discussed during Show & Tell. Eventually — listeners can use code CONNECT10 for 10% off their first year.The Likability Trap by Alicia MenendezSuzy Welch’s Becoming You

What if the goal of a disagreement wasn’t to win, but to make the next conversation possible?Rachel and Jeana talk with Harvard professor Julia Minson, author of How to Disagree Better, about what happens when we assume we already understand the other person. Julia shares a late-night disagreement with her daughter that went sideways, why curiosity needs to be spoken aloud, and a simple “curiosity sandwich” for expressing your view while staying open to someone else’s.They also explore why personal stories can build trust where facts alone may fall short, and how asking a follow-up question shows someone you’re listening. Whether the disagreement is with a child, a friend, or a colleague, this episode offers ways to stay connected through it.This season of The Connection Code is sponsored by Eventually. Visit ⁠eventuallyticketing.com/the-connection-code⁠ and use code CONNECT10 for 10% off your first year.Other content to dig into:Read Julia's book ⁠How to Disagree Better⁠ Dig into Julia's ⁠workshops and research⁠.⁠The CBS News story about the four-year-old who brought his neighborhood together⁠—Rachel’s show-and-tell.

What happens when kids put down their phones and have the freedom to simply be kids?Rachel and Jeana sit down with Tommy Hoffman, executive director of Herzl Camp, to explore why summer camp remains one of the rare places where young people can practice the art of conversation, navigate conflict, develop independence, and form meaningful friendships through repeated, real-life experiences.Tommy shares how returning to camp after a 30-year career helped him find his “A+” calling—and what he has learned from watching hundreds of campers grow, connect, try new things, and become more confident in who they are. Together, they discuss camp as a sanctuary for childhood, the difference between witnessing connection through a screen and experiencing it for yourself, and the lessons adults can borrow from camp to build richer relationships of their own.Plus, Rachel and Jeana tackle one of the least glamorous—but most important—parts of adult friendship: Who is responsible for making the plans? They talk about the invisible labor of being the group planner, rotating responsibility, creating standing dates, and why we could all use more low-pressure “barefoot plans.”Media within: Herzl CampThe Anxious Generation by Jonathan HaidtEventually Ticketing — with code CONNECT10 for 10% off the first yearCut article about the AI-driven summer camp hereThis Closure Instagram video discussing the weight of being the friend who makes plans!

We’re back for Season 3—and after 50 episodes of talking about friendship, connection and the relationships that make life better, we’ve learned a few things.In this season opener, Rachel and Jeana look back at the conversations from Season 2 that have stayed with them, changed their behavior and even sparked new friendships in real life. They talk about why friendship can feel harder in adulthood, the invisible work of being the person who always makes the plans, the vulnerability of feeling left out, and why chemistry alone isn’t enough to turn someone into a close friend.They revisit lessons from guests including Danielle Bayard Jackson on why friendship requires effort, Leslie John on the power—and limits—of vulnerability, Sara Haines on curiosity as a tool for connection, Laura Sanchez Greenberg on building a personal board of directors, Suzy Welch on the freedom to disagree, and more.Plus: the unexpected connections that continued after the microphones turned off, why adults might secretly be craving friendship camp, the beautiful story of Japan’s “wind phone,” and one very small-world dinner party moment that proves you really never know where a cold email might lead.Season 3 is here. Let’s get connected.In this episode:Why friendship doesn’t have to feel effortless to be meaningfulThe emotional sting of a friendship misunderstandingWhat 50 episodes have taught us about vulnerability and curiosityWhy adults need more unstructured time togetherHow to stop defaulting to “What do you do?”The Season 2 conversations Rachel and Jeana are still thinking aboutWhat happens when podcast connections become real-life friendshipsThe case for friendship campMentioned in this episode: Danielle Bayard Jackson, Leslie John, Sara Haines, Laura Sanchez Greenberg, Suzy Welch, Morgan Radford, Dr. Carly Thompson, Shabnam Mogharabi, Lilliana Vazquez, Lily Engelbret and Sarah Spain.This episode is sponsored by Eventually, event ticketing and registration that lives directly on your website without per-ticket fees. Visit eventuallyticketing.com/theconnectioncode and use code CONNECT10 for 10% off your first year.

What happens when you stop waiting to feel ready?This week, we're joined by Peloton instructor, author, and all-around force of nature Kirsten Ferguson for one of our favorite conversations of the season.Kirsten shares the winding path that led her from the NFL to Peloton—including heartbreak, infertility, divorce, reinvention, and learning to embrace a dream she never saw coming. Along the way, she opens up about public speaking anxiety, imposter syndrome, manifestation, motherhood, and why some of the biggest opportunities in life begin with saying "yes" before you feel qualified.We also talk about:Why confidence is something you build—not something you're born with.How movement can become an act of self-love instead of self-punishment.The surprising story behind Kirsten's Peloton audition.Setting boundaries that protect your peace.Why your uniqueness is your greatest strength.The children's book she wrote with her daughters to help young girls grow up believing exactly that.Whether you're standing at the beginning of a new chapter, wrestling with fear, or simply looking for a reminder that you're capable of more than you think, this conversation will leave you feeling a little braver.In this episode, we mention:Kirsten Ferguson's new children's book, From A to Z, This Is Me: An Empowering Alphabet for Young Girls Pre-order herePeloton's Call Yourself a Runner programKirsten's Intention Setting Sunday classesAnd as always, we close with our Connection Code questions—including Kirsten's dream connection (hello, Michelle Obama), the friendship advice she'd give her younger self, and why the smallest circles often hold the deepest relationships.