The Baby Making Business

This week David and Lauren reflect on the arrival of baby Cashel. Everyone has a (birth)plan until they get punched in the face, and we certainly did on this occasion. We reflect on the road that took us here and how it would have been nice to have a drama free delivery after our tumultuous journey. The universe had other plans though. T/W - This week we talk about childbirth.Also - apologies for the slight drop in sound quality this week. We had some technical issues and we are new parents so didn't have the time or sleep banked to rectify it this week!Support our podcast and keep us in nappies and wipes here:https://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusiness

Lauren goes in for a routine scan and is kept in. The Baby is coming. It's D-Day.

This week, we’re talking about trust, transformation and two very different approaches to nesting. But drive each other bonkers in the process.We start with the deeply troubling stories emerging from fertility clinics in northern Cyprus, where families say DNA testing has revealed that the sperm or egg donors they carefully selected may not have been the donors used to conceive their children.It raises a question we’d never really thought to ask during our own fertility treatment: once your eggs, sperm or embryos disappear through that laboratory door, how do you actually know what happens next?Having travelled abroad ourselves for IVF, we talk about the enormous amount of trust patients place in their clinics, what donor selection really means, the implications for children who may have been given the wrong genetic and medical history.Then, things get a little more personal. Lauren goes existential on her third trimester; after years of infertility and IVF made her body feel medicalised, measured and scrutinised, pregnancy is beginning to feel increasingly primal. There is a growing sense of knowing this baby from the inside, his rhythms, movements and patterns.It has also brought an unexpected feeling of connection to the women who came before her: mothers, grandmothers and generations of women who have carried and birthed babies before.And while David has been there through every injection, appointment, scan and wobble, there is an uncomfortable realisation too: there is a part of this experience he will never completely understand. He's still able to help out with a dead spider live on air though.We go in to detail on our opposing nesting techniques and how some day, someone on Netflix will make a documentary about the carnage that occurred over these few weeks in a quiet Essex suburb. Episode Links...https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c74v5jd5zkjo

Today is a balance of silly buggers and “Getting deep Deborahs.”Lauren reveals that she used to have the bladder of a camel but now in her third trimester it’s the size of a teeny, tiny…well Camel. Lauren expands on what other physical deficiencies she now has in her third trimester; including regularly getting stuck on the floor.We talk about the eternal balance of feeling grateful that we are this deep into a pregnancy, but the lens of IVF meaning it never feels real, and that it could go away at any second. With this in mind we do a review of our baby-shower and how we never thought we would enjoy that. Although David got drunk, this time gets a pass. We have an argument about nesting and how we have completely opposing ideas about what needs doing and when.We discuss Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, perhaps the most publicly known figure in America to ever talk about freezing her eggs. This prompts a deep conversation about visibility when it comes to infertility and IVF, and what is a realistic way of helping to ensure that  people who come after us in their quest, don’t have such a shock.Support our Podcast Herehttps://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusiness

To mark IVF day, we celebrate Jean Purdy, perhaps the greatest unsung hero of IVF. In doing so, we discover Rabbits were also trailblazers in the science of IVF.The racist guy over the road interrupts our recording, David raps and we speculate whether or not our baby will inherit his hip-hop stylings. Lauren adds potential gestational diabetes, pelvic girdle pain and an ectropion cervix to her pregnancy bingo card. David lies to Lauren and tells her she has svelte ankles.

We are (kind of) away on our babymoon - but we’ve trashed the joint. This week we talk about how navigating grief recently has made us reflect on our IVF journey. This throws up lots of questions: when and how do you process all of this; especially if you are still navigating it, how has IVF impacted our relationship and how will it impact us as parents?We visit Slough and discuss Boomer Dad’s love of roads. Do Camels have multiple bladders? Lauren does an offensive Welsh accent to Welsh people and also gets up to pee mid episode. Unprofessional. Show Links :https://www.themalefertilityhub.com/https://www.glasshouseretreat.co.uk/Support our Podcast Herehttps://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusinessTrigger warning; this week we discuss loss and grief.

WE. ARE. BACK BABIES!We loop our listeners in on where the hell we have been. Spoiler…some good…some horrendous.We discuss navigating grief, but specifically whilst expecting, and all the complicated emotions that come with that.The Nursery is getting done up and obviously David helped but we did have to send out the bat-signal to the father-in-law to do anything harder than painting. It’s too hot to be pregnant and we decide we will probably move to Ireland or Alaska.We talk about baby-names and is it cruel to name them something outlandish? When is too soon to decide on a name? What if they don’t LOOK like a Jonathan (regardless of gender).We discuss a bit of a buzz topic in the media this week: “why is no one talking about men’s infertility?” - despite the fact we’ve been waffling on about it for years now! We talk about how men’s infertility gets sidelined in the NHS pathway, putting more focus and pressure on the women.Also…we talk about how painful it really is to be kicked in the nuts. Show Links - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx2w4kz7z1kohttps://www.themalefertilityhub.com/Support our Podcast Herehttps://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusiness

This week we talk gender scans and the fact that Lauren slipped up and told the guy that runs our local Italian restaurant before she told her own Mother.David has a sore botty from work, Lauren gets addicted to Vinted baby clothes, and we decide that we already have a difficult child. We tentatively discuss prepping the house and are visited by a camera crew where we have to try and act normal in front of the camera. Which Lauren finds extremely difficult. We also discuss Ai in technology in IVF and infertility. T/W - This week we discuss scans.Support our Podcast Herehttps://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusiness

David struggles with work/life balance and Lauren wallows for a week, but she’s also doing it looking super-cute as she’s now got maternity dungarees.We ponder on why it seems to be Scotland and Northern Ireland who seem to be trailblazing when it comes to Women’s reproductive reform and IVF.We discuss how to avoid raising a mini Norman Bates and how to navigate meeting rubbish babies. We have an orphan cat try to move in, we discuss the pitfalls of a Toby Carvery and Lauren falls into the trap of every expectant mother and buys a f**in’ Doppler.Support our Podcast Herehttps://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusiness

Catherine Tracey is one half of the amazing podcast “IVF BFF” alongside her BFF Sian Morgan.  However Sian is on maternity leave (hooray!), so in her stead we are joined also by Catherine's husband Carl.The four of us discuss scan PTSD  at what can often feel like backstreet scan facilities. We compare notes on the eternal  tempering of hope and excitement especially when you feel like it could all go away at any second. We talk about why we wanted to launch our respective podcasts and the positives of recording in real time but also the pitfalls that come with that.Catherine talks about experiencing loss and new rounds of IVF while her BFF Sian fell pregnant on her first round; how they navigated that both as friends and podcast partners.We talk through our respective diagnoses and Carl and David do a deep dive into male factor infertility and how it impacts you as a partner.We discuss doing IVF on a very stretched NHS and how it compares to private treatmentCatherine tells us what it was like growing up as an IVF baby herself and how her family communicated that to her. She talks about how treatment was done in the 80s and 90s and how it has evolved.We talk about the ripple effects through our families and support network and the people in our lives who have really shown up. We also discuss how IVF can impact intimacy in a relationship and how we have all navigated that.Support our Podcast Herehttps://buymeacoffee.com/thebabymakingbusiness