The Awkward and the Restless-Season 3/Episode 7

I’m thankful that I’ve been able to use Human Systems Dynamics to transform wicked patterns in my life. There’s one pattern that I haven’t been able to transform - not because I don’t have the tools - it’s because I haven’t had the desire and courage to deal with it until now. An unexpected and powerful question from a loving friend and critic recently inspired me to deal with my ugly truths and the company they keep. Staring at it in the face reminds me just how ignorant I’ve been. Fortunately, I’m not ignorant anymore, and I refuse to allow what I once didn’t know to be my forever excuse for not moving past it. Are you holding tightly to unhealthy patterns because they’ve been part of your life for so long that it would feel uncomfortable to live without them? If that is part of your story, I invite you to zoom in and zoom out of your ugly truths with deep curiosity and envision what your life would be like if you had the courage to walk away from what’s kept you safely stuck in a wicked pattern.Overcoming wicked issues can be a tough process, but nothing is intractable when we use Human Systems Dynamics.

Have you ever walked into a room full of empty tables and chairs? People are in the room and yet no one is sitting down. Conversations are happening all around you, but all of the chairs are still empty. Who is going to be the first to take a seat? Which table do you choose? What makes one empty table more appealing than another? I was recently faced with an opportunity to choose from several empty tables in a large room. I was the first to take a seat at the table, and I was joined by human beings I’d never met before, and it was the most magical experience!Empty tables are an invitation to delve into the possibilities that exist because we are human beings with lived experiences. What have you discovered from the tables at which you’ve chosen take a seat? What opportunities did you cease and were there any that you missed out on? What will you do differently the next time you’re at the table? Living Cities is an organization that intentionally and collaboratively brings human beings to the table to center the topics that help us to thrive individually and collectively. To learn more about the work and the change they are committed to, visit https://livingcities.org/.

Do you remember what life was like before social media? What was your primary method for connecting and socializing with others? Do you find it easy or difficult to form connections with people via social media? Is it possible to develop and maintain rich and fulfilling connections with people you follow on social media and may never meet or interact with outside of an app? Think about your social media connections and the connections you’ve formed outside of the digital world. What makes them different and similar? How open are you to developing connections with people no matter where they happen?When you’re not logged into your social media accounts, how do you connect with the people you like and love? How often do you make new connections that don’t involve social media?What would your life be like without social media? How would you make social investments in others?

I recently traveled out of town and found myself in an awkward social experience that some would have avoided. Instead, I decided to look at it as a social experiment that I could get curious about and become better as a result of it.

Human Systems Dynamics (HSD) has been around for more than twenty years. There are associates, around the globe, who have been certified in it and countless learners who have attended one or many HSD non-certification courses. 
The hope is that those that learn HSD are sharing it with others and that sharing will attract more human beings to touch HSD and make it a pattern of being. 
Just recently, I realized that HSD may be part of an individual’s way of living and being without them being formally or informally introduced to HSD. Imagine that! 
It made me wonder where HSD begins and where it ends?
Press play to hear some of the ways HSD is being practiced by human beings as a pattern who don’t know anything about HSD.


The 2024 Paris Olympics is over now, but it’s still a popular topic of conversation around the world. I watched this round of the Olympics more than any other and became sort of addicted to it, but not in the way that you may think. The question that came to mind as I observed the pattern of victory and celebrating life in different events, was where did this notion of being the best come from? How is it helping and/or hindering us both in and outside of sports? What do you think?

Ego is often the primary driver in the life choices and decisions of people that we interact with everyday. Has your ego ever told you that you’re more qualified or better than you are? How often are you making decisions influenced by ego rather reality? How much can your ego be trusted to lead you to the best decision for you and the people living , playing, and working with and around you? Is your ego a little or big influence in your life? How does ego impact three of the most important decisions of our lives? Press play to discover three common adult decisions you may be soon be faced with and learn how our egos can impact the outcome of those critical decisions.

When you finally meet the romantic partner you’ve been dreaming about, love is a splendored thing! If you’re lucky, you can fall in love and stay there forever. If something happens to cause you to fall out of love with the person of your dreams, it can suddenly feel like your heart has been pierced with splinters. I’ve developed a Relationship Math Quiz to help you and your mate determine if your relationship is thriving or just surviving. I invite you and your mate to take the quiz independently so you can see, hear and experience how your partner views your relationship and if it’s in alignment with how you see it.

I have always been afraid of birds, especially those that flock together. On a recent trip to Chicago, I had an epiphany about why everything in the bird species terrifies me, and it took me back to my past when I first read, “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” by Maya Angelou. I was inspired to figure out why the caged bird sings at work, and I now know why their lyrics bother me so much.

I had an amazing four-day vacation that was sandwiched by two wicked issues. Both created major tension between me and the other people that were involved. Rather than remain a victim of my circumstances, I took time to think about what transpired in an HSD type of way. I figured out how I can open a doorway to empathy even when I’m dealing with unreasonable human beings. I realize that there are bad apples out there, but I prefer to beat them with a pattern of self-awareness rather than join them.