Own It All: The Podcast

To wrap up season 2 of the Own It All podcast, I'm sharing my conversation with the incredibly gifted, socially-conscious, driven, wise, and widely published Charlene Carruthers. She's a Black queer feminist community organizer and writer with 15+ years of experience in racial justice, feminist and youth leadership development movement work. She's also the author of the bestselling book Unapologetic: A Black, Queer and Feminist Mandate for Radical Movements, and when we spoke, she had just begun serving as a board member for the Women's March. In discussing what it means to own your power in all aspects of your life, our conversation was both wide and deep. We covered everything from intersectional activism, to staying in integrity while maintaining your boundaries, to reframing the way we look at collective work for liberation. "We shouldn't see every single thing at every moment as the most urgent thing. Moving only in a spirit of urgency will lead us to only focus on one thing and picking away at 'the wall' in one area. But if we say, 'Over my lifespan, there are so many different contributions that I can make,' I believe that's a much more fruitful pathway in doing this work. … There are so many different ways to contribute. It isn't just about where you can physically put your body. What kind of a community you're a part of, what are you reading, what are you teaching other people? All of those things go into transforming the world that we live in." Charlene also shared powerful insights into the importance of authentic relationships with people who are different from you, and how that ties into some of the work that white women need to do. For that, and for everything else she shared, I am so grateful to Charlene taking the time to come onto the show. We only just scratched the surface, so if you'd like to learn more about Charlene's work and philosophies, check out her website to get started. Thanks for tuning in for season 2 of Own It All! I'm so pleased that I could share these conversations with you over the past two months, and I'm so grateful to my guests, and all of you joined us.

Welcome back to the Own It All podcast! I'm thrilled this week to share my conversation with host of the top-rated and much-downloaded self help podcast Unf*ck Your Brain, Kara Loewentheil. Kara is a Master Certified Coach with a B.A. from Yale and J.D. from Harvard Law, and she has been featured in outlets like Marie Claire, Mind Body Green, MSN.com, and The Huffington Post.  Kara and I talked a lot about perfectionism, thought work, and liberation from the inside out. If your brain could use a little bit of "unf*cking" right now, well, this is definitely the episode for you. Kara even shared a brief step-by-step process you can use right now if you're trying to neutralize your thoughts. Write down the thoughts — no editing or analyzing! Pick 1 thought and come up with a neutral version of it. Example: transform the thought "My stomach is gross" to the neutral thought "A lot of people have a stomach like mine." Practice this thought! Repeat it, either aloud or in your head. Make it a habit by using a reminder app, making it a password, or even putting post-it notes around your house. Pay attention to how it feels different in your body over time. "Women being able to think and feel how they want is what's going to create everything else we want on the outside. It's going to create women negotiating for better pay and family friendly leave, and loving their bodies, and enjoying fitness because it feels good. Whatever it is that we want on the outside, we have to do the inside work first. For me, this work is about freeing women to own their lives, but it has to start in our minds." Kara, thank you so much for coming onto the show and sharing your insights on thought work with all of us. And thank you to all of you out there listening and sharing the show! If you want to hear more from Kara, check out unfckyourbrain.com or follow her on Instagram. See you next week!

Well, it's safe to say we're living through a time of massive upheaval and dealing with all of the emotional turmoil that comes along with it. Days feel like weeks and it's easy to get overwhelmed by fear, grief, and uncertainty in the face of this new normal. With all that in mind, this felt like the right time to share my conversation with Ty Alexander. Ty is a best selling author, speaker, podcaster, and wellness blogger who blends radically honest stories with actionable a-ha lessons. We talked about the new entrepreneurial journey and her work with Destination Heal, as well as what it means to choose gratitude over grief and how to set boundaries around the way we communicate our feelings to others. While [our feelings] should have a place in our lives, it doesn't need to be a place every day, all day. A lot of times what happens in trauma is, we allow those feelings to take over our lives all day. Feeling doesn't make any changes. Acknowledge your feelings, write them down, journal. But then what's the steps to get out of that feeling? It's about doing those actionable steps to move yourself out and past that moment. Ty, thank you so much for coming onto the show! I can't tell you how much I enjoyed connecting with you. For those of you out there who want to learn more about Ty, head on over to Instagram and check out @tyalexander and @selfcareirl. Thanks so much for listening and for sharing the show with your friends. See you next week!

Quick show of hands: who out there is struggling with their time management these days? Yeah, that's what I thought. This week on the podcast, I'm excited to introduce you all to my guest, bestselling author and Emmy award winning television producer Paula Rizzo. Her books, Listful Thinking and Listful Living, tackle the topics of list-making, stress, and productivity. With so many of us adapting to a new way of working and living right now, Paula is the perfect person to have on the show to share her insights about how to effectively use lists in both our professional lives and our personal lives. "One thing I talk about is creating lists of feelings. How did you feel after you worked with that one client? How did you feel after you took that vacation? Were you actually less stressed, or were you more stressed? So, really tapping into what's going on with you, how stressed out do you feel in different environments. List making can be used for that as well. It's not only about to-do's, it can help to create a less stressful environment." Paula, thank you so much for coming on the show! For those of you out there listening, if you weren't already in the habit of list-making, I hope this episode has given you some food for thought. You can check out Paula's books here. Thank you so much for tuning in, and I'll be back next week with a brand new episode!

Welcome back to the Own it All podcast! On this week's episode, I'm sharing my conversation with Kurtlan Massarsky. Kurtlan has worked with the Boston Alliance of LGBTQ+ Youth (aka BAGLY) for 8 years as director of development and marketing. He's an advocate for animal rescue organizations, and heartily recommends fantasy and urban fantasy fiction. Kurtlan and I spoke during June of 2019, aka Pride Month, so we talked a lot about his work with BAGLY, the challenges that queer youth face, and how to engage in meaningful allyship. Last June feels like a long time ago — to be honest, last week feels like a long time ago — but my conversation with Kurtlan is more relevant than ever. Times of uncertainty and upheaval are especially dangerous for marginalized groups such as LGBTQ+ youth, but small contributions can have massive benefits. "You can never underestimate the power of caring, and putting your money where your mouth is. A lot of these young people have been told in so many different ways that their effort is minimal because of their age, or that they can't do something because of their gender expression or identity. When they realize that there are literally hundreds if not thousands of people who are willing to take a little money out of their paycheck to support their work or to support their getting therapy, that makes a real difference to them." Kurtlan, I can't thank you enough for coming onto the show and helping us all to strike the tricky balance between feeling bothered by what we see in the world and feeling hopeful. Thank you as well to everyone out there listening, reviewing, and sharing the show. If you'd like to learn more or contribute to BAGLY, I urge you to visit their website. Thank you again, and see you next week!

This week, I'm so excited to share my conversation with Sara Minkara, Founder and CEO of Empowerment Through Integration. ETI is a non-profit committed to developing a more inclusive society by empowering youth with disabilities through direct service programming and by transforming social and cultural stigma against disabilities.  From the time she lost her vision at age 7, Sara experienced two very different worlds. During the school year, she felt empowered by her family and teachers, and lived a full and rich life. When she traveled to visit extended family during the summer, however, she was exposed to a world where her blindness was considered to be a burden or a source of shame. These experiences played a huge role in Sara's journey and the work that she does with ETI. We talked about her story, what self care looks like for her, and how she stays grounded and humble while pursuing her big dreams of disrupting the narrative surrounding disability. "I didn't reach what I've reached so far because I'm smarter or have a bigger skill set. No. Every single person has something beautiful to contribute. Everyone has a power within them. They just need someone to help them recognize and see that power within." Sara, thank you so much for everything you shared on the show today. And thank you also to everyone out there listening, subscribing, and sharing the show with your friends! If you'd like to learn more about the work Sara does through ETI, you can visit their website or check out Sara on Twitter @MInkaraSara. I'll see you next week with a brand new episode.

This week, I'm sharing my chat with Nick North, making his second appearance on the show — this time, solo! Full disclosure: this conversation was unplanned and 100% organic, covering everything from microaggressions and how to be a better ally, to balancing boundaries with people-pleasing, to surgery and gender and politics. "All of us have this thing that makes us different. This thing we're secretly ashamed of, or we thought made us broken. And the truth is, that thing is actually what makes us most beautiful. We spend so much time trying to hide away this thing that is embarrassing or shameful or doesn't fit. [...] We are all different, and that is what makes us awesome." I hope you'll enjoy listening to this conversation as much as I enjoyed having it. Want more from Nick? Find him over at his website and give him a follow on Instagram @epicdanger.  I'll be back next Wednesday with some more season 2 goodness, so be sure to subscribe (if you haven't already) on your podcast platform of choice. See you next week!

Welcome to Season 2 of Own It All! I'm so happy you're back for more tips on how to make a difference in your life, and the world around us.  We're kicking off the new season with the one and only Ash Ambirge! Ash is an internet entrepreneur and founder of the Middle Finger Project whose voice has been called "the most memorable on the internet." I'm so thrilled that Ash came onto the show to share her "sweary" wisdom on dangerous ideas, the curious relationship between guilt and gratitude, radical self-reliance, and the difference between happiness and meaningfulness. "Coming from a small town, I was very scared in the beginning to talk about what I wanted to do. Doing so felt like a slight to other people and I was aware of that. It was a little bit like, by challenging your reality, I'm challenging your decisions too. And that's a very difficult thing to do because people get into the dream-zapper mode of 'Who does she think she is?' Those are the kinds of comments that keep women down." Want more Ash? I don't blame you! You can find her over at her website, the Middle Finger Project, where you can do everything from sign up for her newsletter to buy her new book. I'll be back next Wednesday with some more season 2 goodness, so be sure to subscribe (if you haven't already) on your podcast platform of choice. See you next week!

If you've ever struggled with career burnout, planning your next move professionally, or any facet of owning your career, this episode with Emilie Aries is for you! Not only is she the founder and CEO of the award winning training company Bossed Up, she's also a podcaster and soon to be first-time author of Bossed Up: A Grown Woman's Guide to Getting Your Shit Together (which comes out in May). Whether you know what you want, or just know you don't want what you have right now, Emilie is all about helping women craft happy, healthy, and sustainable career paths. "When you change your identity, you make yourself more likely to take different actions from there on out. If I start to see myself as someone who can speak up for myself — because I did it once, even though it was scary, but people listened and I was validated by that external vote of confidence — I'm going to feel more capable of speaking out. It turns into a snowball effect of risk taking. Being willing to see yourself differently gives you permission to act differently moving forward." Tune in to hear Emilie share all about: What her time in politics taught her about power, and owning her career Signs that you're ready to own your career and make a big transition How to start creating your boss identity, and keep growing it The 2 actions you can take when your boss move gets a negative response Deliberately crafting a community whose feedback you know you can trust Emilie, it was so great having you on the show! I encourage everyone out there listening to join the online Courage Community so you can thrive while you strive. Got your career on lock, but in search of more tips on owning it all? I've got you covered: my book, Own It All, is now available for purchase! Pick up your copy today!

Raise your hand if you've ever felt like you don't have time to do the things that are important to you. What would your life look like if you could truly own your time? To dig into that, I spoke with Sarah Von Bargen, who is committed to helping people spend their time, money, and energy on purpose. Sarah has a wildly successful and long-running blog, Yes and Yes, as well as fantastic online courses like Habit School, Bank Boost, and 18 Scripts for Awkward Conversations. Even after years of reading her blog, she still had wisdom and truth bombs galore to share that blew me away during our chat. So let's talk time! "How you spend your minutes, hours, and days is how you spend your life. It's so easy to create loopholes and excuses and to tell ourselves 'I don't have time to do that.' But if we don't prioritize the things that are important to us, time passes! Time passes whether you spend it intentionally or not. And it sucks to wake up 3, 4, 5 years later and realize you're not any closer to that thing you said you wanted than you were five years ago." Listen along if you want to hear about: Go-to strategies and tips to find your "on purpose," track your time, and thwart social media addiction The importance of being 100% honest with yourself about what you want How the messages we absorb subconsciously ripple out into the decisions we make Planning for pleasure, fun, and friendship What kept Sarah going during the long haul of building her blog Sarah, thanks so much for coming onto the show this week! I know my listeners are going to love hearing what you had to say. (Psst: the next round of Habit School starts soon — enroll now!)  Looking for more tips on owning it all? Good news — my book, Own It All, is now available for purchase! Pick up your copy today!