Self-Care vs. Self-Indulgence: Protection, Not Perks with Becky Lauridsen
September invites fresh structure and, if we’re not careful, fresh burnout. In this conversation, licensed professional counselor and Enneagram coach Becky Lauridsen reframes self-care as protection (not pampering) and opens the door to brain health with neurofeedback. From postpartum anxiety and over-functioning to rodeo performance and concussion recovery, we explore how to build capacity on purpose, before the crash out.Becky shares the origin story of IOWEME (“I owe me”), a preventative, accessible, guilt-free self-care model born from her own burnout and postpartum anxiety. We unpack the crucial difference between self-indulgence (instant relief, little ROI) and true self-care (sometimes uncomfortable, always compounding). We also trade the myth of work–life balance for work–life harmony: a “pleasing arrangement of parts” calibrated to your actual rhythms (hello, 5:30am clarity!).Then Becky takes us into ROAM (Rodeo Optimization and Mindset) and explains low-energy neurofeedback as a practical path to brain health. Think “parking brake off” for your frontal lobe: better regulation, focus, and recovery after high-intensity performance (for athletes and their horses). If you’re craving capacity that’s truly sustainable, this one’s for you.Listen in for …The self-care vs. self-indulgence distinction, and why protection beats pampering.The IOWEME model: preventative, accessible, and simple mental-health support.Work/life harmony (not balance): designing a “pleasing arrangement of parts.”The “check-engine light” for burnout (irritability over the stray socks = signal).Neurofeedback 101: electrical vs. chemical brain systems, suppression, and flexibility.The “parking brake” metaphor: why so many high-capacity women feel stuck in Delta.Performance & recovery for rodeo athletes, and why brain care must match body care.The pony case study (!) and what equine sessions revealed about regulation.TL;DR (Minute by Minute)00:00 “Conversations” > “episodes” + why listener feedback matters.01:11 Meet Becky: LPC, EMDR, Enneagram coach, LENS neurofeedback provider.06:17 Postpartum anxiety, burnout, and the wake-up call: it starts with me.10:01 IOWEME origin: from reactive therapy culture to preventative care.12:32 Responsibility & boundaries: self-care as non-negotiable, not “extra.”16:00 Self-indulgence vs self-care (instant relief vs lasting effect).18:54 “Outweigh the indulgence”: a practical rule that still leaves room for fun.23:44 Non-negotiable habits: why early-morning quiet time compounds.27:34 Work/life harmony > balance; design for your real energy ebb and flow.31:47 ROAM begins: from rodeo roots to neurofeedback certification.35:49 Neurofeedback explained: amplitude, frequency, suppression.38:59 The parking brake brain: lifting Delta lock for flexible regulation.41:01 Equine neurofeedback: the pony case and practical behavior change.43:35 Head trauma, concussions, CTE risk, and recovery as standard practice.47:26 Where to find Becky + what’s next.Where to Go From HereQuestion for you: When the day feels heavy, which shows up first: self-indulgence or true self-care? Screenshot and tag @cowgirlsovercoffee with your answer so we can crowdsource smart strategies that actually stick.The FREE Routine Playbook. Your step-by-step for routines that protect capacity (so consistency can finally kick in!). Get Yours HereJoin the Cowgirls Over Coffee Lifetime Membership. Where conversation, accountability, and routines become infrastructure....