Adoptees Share the Honest Reality of Having Two Moms
Send us Fan MailMother's Day is such a difficult day for everyone in the adoption triad. Adoptees, adoptive mothers, birth mothers, stepmothers, all kinds of mothers. It's a difficult day. And we're going to talk about this this morning. Today, Pam Kroske, my sidekick, and I are going to be doing a lot more podcasts. I apologize thatIt's taken us a while to get back to you, but thank you for following us on the last one. But Pam, Pam, tell us a little bit about you and how difficult you perceive this day to be. You say it so well. Well, I say it well. But, you know, having...Pam (00:49.72)What? Well, I don't know if I say it well. But you know, having two moms, I think, is always difficult. One of my moms isn't here anymore. She passed away from breast cancer, and it was way too soon. And then.Sherrie Eldridge (01:00.301)To moms, I think it's always difficult.One of my moms isn't here anymore. She passed away from breast cancer, and it was way too soon. And then my adoptive mother has dementia. So that's difficult. Very difficult. Yeah, yeah. So I think it's always been terrible, no matter what.Pam (01:19.694)My adoptive mother has dementia. So that's difficult. So yeah, yeah. So I think it's always been a struggle, no matter what. And trying to get both of them into my life all this time has been difficult.Sherrie Eldridge (01:38.477)And trying to get both of them to come into my life all this time has been difficult. Yes. So they always try to find warm memories, even if they're not with you. You try to find a warm memory? Is that what you said? Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah. I think you try to find that good space. Yeah, that safe space. Well, yeah.Pam (01:44.973)So, you know, always try to find them even if they're not with you.Pam (01:54.314)Yeah, yeah, I think you try to find that good space.Pam (02:01.399)Yeah.Sherrie Eldridge (02:02.666)You know, what may adoptive moms experience? I've got pushback, rejection, and abandonment. Some of them, your kids won't even talk to you. They've just said, you know, I forgot you, you're out of my life. Yeah, rejection. What would be some examples of rejection?Pam (02:29.453)Well, you mean from... I mean...Sherrie Eldridge (02:29.728)Well, the meaning for any age adoptee can be. When we go searching, we don't always find what we want. Yeah. Mean, that part of our lives can be so difficult. I mean, we don't find every warm space we want. And it'sPam (02:36.813)Yeah, I mean, when we go searching, we don't always find what we want. I mean, that part of our lives can be so difficult. I mean, we don't find every warm space we want. It can be so difficult. And then we sit with that rejection. And then our adoptedSherrie Eldridge (02:57.9)It can be a service. And then we sit with that rejection. And then our adoptive moms aren't always, you know, good with that sourcing we did. So they have a little bit of rejection. And they're upset with us for that. So I don't know, like, it's almost like a hardness feeling.Pam (03:05.153)Moms aren't always good with that sourcing we did. So they have a bit of rejection, and they're upset with guys about it. So there's this, I don't know, like it's almost like a hardness feeling, and we all hurt. Yeah.Sherrie Eldridge (03:28.086)And we all hurt. Yeah. And so those three things, pushback, rejection, abandonment, we all have them, right? We've all got it. Yeah, and yet in the midst of all that, for an adoptee, I must say that, like you mentioned, reunion and, you know, searching and everything, I still find it.Pam (03:38.442)Yeah. yeah. Yeah.Pam (03:54.635)Right.Sherrie Eldridge (03:56.705)Very helpful to look back on my search because I found some very cool things, like, you know, I found out who the granddaughter of the doctor who delivered me was.All Rights Reserved. 2026. @sherrieeldridge
