277. Being unacceptable

When we find ourselves in a process of self-inquiry, the way that our perspective shifts is truly miraculous. We see things differently. The people in our lives, the situations we’re in, the resources we have, and most of all, ourselves. In this experience of seeing life differently, one of the fears that the mind will often bring up is the fear of going ‘crazy’ or losing our minds. (It’s actually quite a literal fear: the ego-mind is afraid to not exist, thus the terrifying images of what it must look like to “lose” it.) This week’s group inquiry centers on this fear while also looking at the sidebar fear of being proclaimed “unacceptable.” Who would we be without even these stories? As Katie says, there is nothing so dark that we cannot put it on paper, question it, and set ourselves free.

In this week’s episode, Tom begins with an invitation to notice what comes up internally with the sentence, “I’m ready to be honest about my yeses and nos.” As in, I’m ready to notice what my genuine responses are and live them. Often when we hold onto giving a dishonest yes, it comes from the idea that by doing that, we’re making ourselves show up as kind, caring people. But what does it actually create when we really look? Does it help us show up in a genuinely kind way? Or does it create a breeding ground for resentment and miscommunication? What might it be like to live from a place of real integrity? And could it be that an experience of real integrity could come from self-inquiry? Join in and follow along to find out!

This week’s inquiry is on the thought, “I should be different.” As Tom puts it, none of us, as children, receive unconditional love, and right away we make that mean something about ourselves. Thus begins the steady march of this belief in our minds. “I should be different…” But rarely do we slow down to question a thought like this and notice what it truly gives us. We think it gives us the change we’re looking for – the showing up differently. But how do you actually react? What really happens when you believe this thought? It could be that it’s nothing more than an obstruction of vision, causing us to miss the amazing experience of being human. Find out for yourself by joining in with your own work – and your own ‘I should…”

Happy New Year to all the Love Is The Power listeners! We’re kicking off 2026 with an episode for anyone who’s ever looked at someone else and had the thought, “They have something I don’t have.” For those who walk the path of being some kind of seeker, it can be especially enticing to believe this thought in relation to someone who appears to ‘have’ enlightenment. Katie herself says she doesn’t know anything about enlightenment – she just knows the difference between what hurts and what doesn’t. But that doesn’t stop the mind with this belief, which is why this week’s line of inquiry is so profound. Welcome back – let’s do The Work.

In the world of the thought, “They could have done better,” we are not left with much compassion or ability to show up the way we’d (probably) like to in any given situation. That’s one of things participants noticed in this week’s inquiry facilitated by Tom, beginning with noticing someone who brings up a sense of unlovingness within. It doesn’t matter if we’re believing that the person in question who could have done better is someone else, a whole group of people, or ourselves. The result is the same. Stress. This week’s episode ends with an invitation from Tom into a turnaround for this thought: Just as an experiment, feel the opposite position – that no one, including myself, could ever have done better than we did. Listen to this week’s inquiry and join in to explore the world of this belief as well as experience your presence without it. 

What happens, how do you react when you believe the thought, “I know what is and isn’t possible in life"? What kind of life do you find yourself reading with this thought? What kind of Universe is it? Friendly or malicious? In this group meditation, participants question this belief among others and discover some profound things – including an ever-present fear of a ‘cosmic bitch slap.’ If you can relate, this week’s episode of Love Is The Power is for you.

On a podcast about self-inquiry, meditation, awakening and inner freedom, you don’t necessarily expect an episode about dogs – but here we are. This week, our furry friends are our teachers as one participant shares his frustrating situation: his city is threatening to crack down on unleashed dogs, but he wants his dog to be able to run. This work is rewarding on its own, but the cherry on top of the inquiry cake is that another participant whose own dog was once attacked by an unleashed dog is on the group meditation call as well, and the conversation brings up trauma for her. Join in this atmosphere of easygoing, good-humoured healing that The Work can so easily create – especially if you identify as someone with trauma – and question with us: Is it true that you need to hold onto trauma?

In last week’s episode, we looked at the tendency to hold things as problems. This week we’re adding to the exploration the tendency to believe “I have to do something with my life” and “There’s a destination I have to get to.” Some key questions in this episode are:Is it true in this moment that there’s a destination to get to? Or that we have to ‘do something’ with our lives or hold things as problems?What kind of experience of life do we give ourselves by believing those thoughts? What might an experience of life look like beyond these beliefs? Happy inquiring!

This week the Love Is The Power inquiry group looks at the habit of holding things (situations, people, the state of the world) as a problem. It’s such an insidious habit, it tends to fly under the radar for most of us until we check in. But when we consciously look at a situation that we’d like to be different, it’s easy to see the belief, “I have to hold this as a problem." We might think that if we hold it as a problem we’ll fix it better or faster, and if we don’t then the situation won’t change at all. But what does this thought actually create in our lives? Does it help us show up the way we’d like to? Or does it give us a harvest of fear?

This week, as Tom puts it, the trigger for self-realization could be a bathroom! In a playfully profound inquiry on money, the group questions the thought, “There is a right and wrong amount of money to have, and a right and wrong way to spend it.” One person’s share acts as a through-thread in the inquiry, pondering whether or not it’s wrong to want and pay for a bathroom renovation. It sure feels wrong when this is the thought running our financial lives. But, as Tom will often ask, is the feeling proof? Is the sense of wrongness surrounding the spending of money really proof that it is inherently wrong somehow? We noticed we don’t know for sure. What we do know is that we’ve seen a lot of people act like it’s true since we arrived on this planet. But what if they all learned to believe this story, just the same as we did? What would that mean about the nature of money? What if it’s nothing like we imagine it is?