Katherine Morgan Schafler: Perfectionism is a Gift

You know a magical connection when you feel it—that undeniable magnetism that pulls you together for a fit that's as much like home as it is an adventure.  We see these sorts of connections in romcoms all the time, but they're not just relegated to the romcom realm. Magical connections happen in friendships, too, and Rhaina Cohen wants to dignify them. This conversation with the  writer and NPR Embedded producer/editor draws on some key stories and insights from her new book: The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center. Caitlin and Rhaina talk about why it can be beautiful and beneficial to distribute the "significant other" title across many people, what it looks like to treat friendships more like life partnerships, the  friendship tradition and where we might have lost passionate platonic significant otherships, and the important work of letting the ones who love us see our mess.In the Bookend, Ben and Caitlin discuss friendship, awkwardly thank each other for their friendship, and make further learning and reading recs. And thank you, listeners, for bein' a friend. :)Caitlin's Rec: Rituals Roadmap by Erica Keswin Ben's Rec: Caitlin's Guide on Adult Friendship and The Lonely Century by Noreena HertzTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code friendship.Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi! Find Caitlin on instagram at @cschills https://www.instagram.com/cschills/[2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist 

Here's a chilling thought: experts are saying that we may soon be sustaining 100-year work lives. If that's true, then how many careers might we have? How will we know where to upskill? And how will we keep bagged lunches interesting for so many years? Michelle R. Weise, researcher and author of Long Life Learning: Prepare for Jobs That Don't Even Exist Yet, offers ways to think through and prepare for the long life of work ahead. She outlines five principles for the educational ecosystem that can support the future workforce, offers ideas on how AI can actually help you become more marketable, and gives a super straightforward framework for knowing which skills you should develop to stay relevant in your job. You'll also learn about what it means to become a "skills translator," able to showcase to future employers your unique aspects that lend a competitive edge over AI. Plus: listen up for why we all really need to stay alert to our discomfort on the job—it might be telling us something important. Caitlin's Rec: Farai Chideya’s Simplify EpisodeMichelle's WebsiteTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code reflect.Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist   

Today, our guest is an award-winning beauty reporter and critic whom you might have stumbled upon while reading her super popular newsletter, The Unpublishable, which, as HuffPost says, "basically gives the middle finger to the entire beauty industry." Writing about what the beauty industry won’t tell you, Jessica DeFino has built an identity as a reporter on a mission to reform it.It all started, however, in a place as opposite as it could be: a few years back, Jessica was a product-obsessed editor for the Kardashian-Jenner Official Apps, embedded in the core of the beauty industry. This exact "behind-the-scenes" angle and her own beauty-product mishaps led her to start bravely and compellingly writing about what she experienced: mass marketing manipulations, pseudoscience, and consumerism that have become endemic to the beauty industry. Her fearless truth-telling on topics such as the politics of appearance in the Barbie movie, or why Madonna’s plastic surgery is not as subversive as she claims, makes her one of the most beloved analysts and writers on beauty culture out there.Jessica doesn't reject beauty. Instead, she seeks to reveal the industry and culture built around it. Beauty remains an essential force we all crave as humans, but in order to reveal its roots, we have to dismantle the boring, mass-produced thing that beauty has become.Recommended by Jessica:  Disobedient Bodies by Emma DabiriThe Book of Ayn by Lexi FremanRecommended by Caitlin and Ben: Happy Fat by Sofie HagenChatter by Ethan CrossTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code beauty. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stephane Obadia at Blinkist

This week's episode of Simplify brings you a special collaboration: a conversation with Dhiraj Mukherjee, who is not only the entrepreneur behind Shazam (the app we all love and use so much!), but also a devoted impact investor focused on social good.Drawing from his experience at Shazam, Dhiraj learned firsthand that the best way to predict the future is to create it. That’s why today, his work mostly focuses on investing in mission-driven companies aiming to create a better future for the planet, addressing critical issues such as climate action and inequality.In this interview, Dhiraj shares some of his most valuable insights across his career, emphasizing the crucial importance of tapping into your instincts and developing your own taste and intuition. Moreover, it leaves us with a short but important reminder that optimism matters: every valuable change once started with nothing but hope for a better future.UN 17 Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs)Recommended by Dhiraj: How to Avoid a Climate Disaster by Bill GatesRecommended by Caitlin and Ben: The Social Animal by David BrooksThe Business of Good by Jason HaberTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code impact. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Ben Jackson at Blinkist

Although we're at the tail end of 2024's symbolic new beginning, we're still confronted with the flood of discounted "detoxes," "cleanses," gym promotions touting a "New Year, new you," and the latest buzzword, "resets." Despite our desire to think that fad diets are relics of the past and that we have collectively moved away from diet culture, we may instead have fallen for a wolf in sheep's clothing.Drawing from her personal narrative and investigative reporting experiences, Cole Kazdin, an Emmy Award-winning journalist, scrutinizes today's diet industry and the disorder it spawns in her debut book, 'What's Eating Us - Women, Food, and the Epidemic of Body Anxiety.' Walking us through the issues in our generation, she interviews women and the world’s most renowned researchers, revealing disordered eating as the crisis it is—a mental illness with the second-highest mortality rate (after opioid-related deaths)—and a topic that no one wants to talk about.In this week’s episode of Simplify, Cole generously shares with us her hard-won wisdom for navigating true health while still living in a dysfunctional world. Even more importantly, the conversation will leave you with a gentle but revolutionary reminder of how gratifying it is to focus on how health is lived and felt in the body rather than the size you’re wearing.Recommended by Caitlin and Ben: Simplify Interview: Sonya Renee Taylor: Love Yourself, Save The World Intuitive Eating by Evelin Tribole and Elise Resch Try Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code kazdin.Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist

Today, we bring you Simplify's first ever crossover episode with the  #1 Technology show on Apple Podcasts and Spotify: Acquired!For nearly 9 years David Rosenthal—today's guest—and his co-host Ben have been sharing the strategies and history of 200+ of the world's most successful businesses. From Sequoia to Sony, through to TSMC, Amazon, The New York Times, the NBA and Oprah, Acquired's hosts go deep—sometimes 3 hours deep!—into the details of each business's ups and downs. In this episode of Simplify, we had the unique chance to tap into David's unique wisdom and expertise and ask: what are the patterns you've seen across these success stories? Caitlin and David focus on 3 big lessons from David's gleaned through years of research and immersion. He shares one powerful lesson on customers, one on product, and one that extends out to collaborations. They scrutinize and highlight the insights and attitudes that have helped some of the world's most notable companies thrive. What’s more, with an experience of two hosts and expert interviewers, they reach some everlasting wisdom on quality, connection, and authenticity— applicable both in business and life! Check out Blinkist's exclusive collection that offers concise and insightful Blinks, revealing the secrets behind Nike's global triumphs, tailored for listeners of the Acquired podcast. Recommended by Caitlin and Ben:Powers of Two by Joshua Wolf ShankThe Everything Store by Brad StoneTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code acquired. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist

In 1971, Joni Mitchell released Blue, an album teeming with stories of a life shaped by romance, desire, longing, and the default path of sharing life with another person. The ideal might persist to this day, but what happens if the romance we are  told will give life meaning... never shows up? How gorgeous and fulfilling can we make our lives, sans romantic partner? Amy Key, the celebrated British essayist and poet, sets out to explore exactly these questions in her memoir, Arrangements in Blue, with Joni's seminal album as its scaffolding. Amy embarks on an intimate, sometimes painfully candid journey to search for all the things a soulmate was supposed to deliver, working out how to live well in this culture that prizes romantic love. And she shares her findings with us.Amy’s wisdom and tenderness guide us from an important shift in ideas about intimacy and solitude to the painful feelings we are often too ashamed to discuss: loneliness, envy, grief, and the sensation of wanting. In this episode, learn about the importance of building a home, how to travel alone, the importance of recognizing your own milestones, and why we should consider expanding the remit of friendship.Recommended by Caitlin and Ben:Living Your Best Single LifeSimplify episode - Rebecca Traister and The Power of Being SingleAll the Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover TawwabRecommended by Amy: Kick the Latch by Katherine ScanlanTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code arrangement. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist

What do people mean when they say, 'I'm a perfectionist'? The colloquial and widespread opinion would sound like this: A perfectionist is someone who desires everything to be perfect at all times and becomes upset when things aren't perfect. This definition is often followed by the (generic) advice that the best way for them to set themselves free is to get rid of their perfectionism.According to Katherine Morgan Schafler, a psychotherapist and a former on-site therapist at Google, this is not only wrong but also causes more harm than good. After spending years dismantling perfectionism, Katherine wrote 'The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control,' offering a new and unique approach for all those who are sick of being given the generic advice to 'find balance' and feel ready to embrace their perfectionism for what it is—a gift.In this episode, Katherine shares her practical knowledge of understanding various perfectionist traits and how to make them work for you, not against you. By introducing us to the five different perfectionist types in detail, Katherine demonstrates that with the valuable gifts each perfectionist type naturally brings to the table, you can learn to embrace and even enjoy your perfectionism beyond merely managing it. Which of the five types of perfectionist are you? Classic, intense, Parisian, messy, or procrastinator? Take the quiz!Recommended by Caitlin: The 80/20 Principle by Richard KochRecommended by Katherine: Push Off from Here by Laura McKowenBuild For Tomorrow by Jason Feifer Try Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code perfection. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist

When we experience a traumatic event or decide to pursue healing, what often follows is the tendency to isolate and hide from the world. Shame, exclusion, and the feeling that no one understands remain intertwined with the term "healing." However, this can and should be different—and that 's the message licensed social worker and therapist Minaa B. is here to spread."Owning Our Struggles," Minaa’s first book, as well as her work in general, stands out for its unique approach and strong emphasis on social justice and community care. In this week’s episode, she shares powerful and practical insights on how to heal holistically, while also focusing on shared emotional struggle, from overcoming dysfunctional family patterns to developing emotional maturity and moving past isolation and despair.Whether you want to pursue healing, build authentic and safe relationships, or break free from family dysfunction, this conversation and Minaa’s book are a roadmap to healing by creating communities that support self-fulfillment, intimacy, and a happier life.Recommended by Caitlin: Shortcast - Dr. Ken Druck: Caring for an Aging Parent by host Eric ZimmerTry Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code healing. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller [2], Ben at @bsto https://twitter.com/bsto [3]. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Ben Schuman-Stoler, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist

We might say that “age is just a number,” but if we're really honest with ourselves, a lot of us still think of “old” people as stubborn hoarders who eat dinner (too) early and are forever talking about their aches and pains. Why is that? And could there be another way?These questions prompted Steven Petrow, an award-winning journalist and author to begin compiling a list of things he won’t do when he gets old shortly after his 50th birthday. The list, which included “You won’t have to shout at me that I’m deaf” and “I won’t blame the family dog for my incontinence," was mainly based on all the things he thought his then-70-something parents were doing wrong. The list became first an essay and then a book, now praised as an "essential guide on how to age with grace, wisdom, humor and hope."In this episode, Steven and Caitlin tackle ageing with honesty and compassion, exploring together how we can live a little better and a little more gracefully than the generations before us. The beauty of intergenerational friendships, (internalized) ageism, and perennials are just a few of the topics covered—with the beauty of the interview lying in the shared conclusion: everyone benefits immensely from understanding people for who they are, not how old they are.Book recommended by Caitlin: Wiser by Dilip Jeste and Scott LaFeeBooks recommended by Steven: How I Won a Nobel Prize by Julius Taranto Tom Lake by Ann Patchett This is Not Going to End Well by Daniel Wallace Try Blinkist for free for 14 days by going to [https://www.blinkist.com/simplify\][2], tapping on Try Blinkist at the top right, and entering the code petrow. If you'd like to receive the Simplify newsletter with great insights, questions, and quotes from each episode to get a look back or a taste of what’s to come, you can sign up here:  https://substack.com/@simplifybyblinkist?utm_source=profile-page. Let us know what you thought of this episode, or just come say hi on Twitter! Find Caitlin at @caitlinschiller https://twitter.com/caitlinschiller. You can write us all an email at [email protected] [4].This episode of Simplify was produced by Caitlin Schiller, Maria Levacic & Stéphane Obadia at Blinkist