If I Had Legs I'd Kick You: Everything Is Under Control

Joe and Graham from Films at First Sight join Caitlin to cover Tiger Stripes, a 2023 Malaysian body horror film. We talk about menstruation, coming of age, friendship, bullying, folklore, and more. Tangents include: the Sleepaway Camp franchise, podcast titles and evolutions, chicken wings, and were-animal preferences.

Maddie joins Caitlin to review Saccharine, a new release that tackles what many critics are calling "Ozempic horror." We cover binge eating disorder, fatphobia, bodies (and body dysmorphia), weight loss, GLP-1s, and more. This is a tricky one, but it's also important. Stream it now on Shudder. Tangents include: sandwiches of RVA, favorite words, tinned food, sock WYRs, "the big one," imagined new pop singles, the downfall of AI, fantasy public infrastructure, jumbotron messages, and pet astrology.

Caitlin is joined by favorite tattoo artist Tannis to review The Cell (2000). We talk about surrealism, psychology, art history, memory, and more. This one holds up, and it's a fav for the weird/goth/art babes in your life. Tangents include: horror-themed tattoos, movie run times, media literacy, favorite horror movies, upcoming films, and first tattoos. Be sure to check out Tannis over at Black Rabbit.

The beautiful boys of the Straight Chilling Podcast join Caitlin to cover 1993's The Good Son. It appears to have been a critical miss at the time, but a longtime fan favorite for genre lovers. We talk about child psychopathy, monstrous motherhood, 90s parenting, and more. Tangents include: Straight Chilling's upcoming 600th episode, evil children, a spooky FMK (and the resulting discussion on spectrophilia), Daniel Radcliffe vs Elijah Wood, Soju's beef with Elijah, Macaulay Culkin's name, Stephen King's Maine, DVD shopping, breakfast for dinner, sleeping with fans on, and fragrance.

Christian of the Boiled Milk Podcast joins Caitlin to review The Drama, a 2026 black comedy from A24. Although not a traditional horror movie, this provocative film does go some scary places. We cover subjective morality and what it means to "sit in the gray," among other challenging topics. Tangents are many and include: nervous puking, theoretical unforgivable confessions,"worst thing" confessions, love languages, the unreliability and subjective nature of memory, intent vs impact, hetero wedding nonsense, Christian's wedding-role EGOT mission, movie teasers vs movie trailers, Plug It Up merch, empty coffee cup props, Al vs AI, and reversing pretty privilege.

Mary and Nichole join Caitlin to cover 2011's We Need to Talk About Kevin, a monstrous-motherhood modern classic. We discuss themes around memory, reluctant motherhood, "bad seed" children, and what it means to love (and hate) a monster, especially when that monster is your child. We carry a lot of empathy for Eva, which seems to be an unpopular take. Where do you land? Tangents include: psychopathy, podcast catalogs, favorite museums, bows and arrows instead of guns, a Kevin FMK, John C. Reilly, Tilda Swinton, pro-choice movies, pet peeves, and evil kids. Also forgive my temporary misgendering of Ezra Miller, who uses they/them pronouns.

Charlie joins Caitlin to cover a heavy hitter in the horror genre: The Silence of the Lambs. It's a titan of cinema, and we love it... almost as much as we love doing impressions. We talk about gender and sexuality, and we, of course, dig into the background, details, and legacy of the movie. Tangents include: first horror movies, best shapes, irrational annoyances, toilet paper preferences, latest obsessions, stalkers, and the ol' long pig. And I must correct myself: haramuki is spring rolls; mukimame is shelled edmame.

Mary and Christian join Caitlin to review Obsession, the record-smashing (and face-smashing) new horror hit from director Curry Barker. We discuss autonomy, consent, rejection, and the danger of "the nice guy." #bearbad - you heard it here first. Tangents include: the pledege of allegiance, animal deaths in movies, first horror movies, annoyances, AI, the best shapes, toilet paper preferences (someone please take my side on this one), our latest obsessions, and obsessive relationship stories.

Soju from the Straight Chilling Podcast joins Caitlin to review Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person, a charming vampire movie from 2023. We discuss themes around coming of age, burgeoning sexuality, and empathy. This is a very sweet one; find it on Shudder. Tangents include: other podcast ideas, lost items, recurring nightmares, soju (the drink), comfortable shoes, and a good ol' FMK (creepy-crawly edition). 

Charlie joins Caitlin to cover Swallow, a fan favorite from 2019. We talk about themes around pica, motherhood, class, marriage, and abortion, and we praise the movie's writing and direction. It's a great one; find it on Shudder. Tangents include: Diet Coke, my garden, birds, clocks, swallowing things, bad haircuts, TV volume, instagram, and strange foods.