I Learned Nothing

Pat was feeling unique so Ben blasts his precious little perspective right out of the water by introducing him to the Twin Earth thought experiment. In one fell swoop, Ben destroys Pat's commitment to semantic internalism thanks to Hilary Putnam and his view that "meaning just ain't in the head." If you know anything about philosophy of language, you'll recognize this thought experiment for the earth shattering mental exercise that it is. If you know nothing about philosophy of language, FUCK YOU! Check out our Patreon for bonus episodes: patreon.com/ILearnedNothing

Pat was feeling murderous so Ben tamps that rage with the devout moral reasoning of near-canonized Catholic saint and Wittgenstein acolyte Gertrude Elizabeth Margaret Anscombe. One of the big heavy hitters of Ordinary Language Philosophy and pioneer of Virtue Ethics, G.E.M. Anscombe started her career as a Catholic convert, then Wittgenstein's protege/favorite, then went toe-to-toe with the 20th Century's greatest mass murder, Harry S. Truman over his trigger-happy bombings of innocent civilians. CHECK IT OUT! Also check out our Patreon for Bonus Content: www.patreon.com/ILearnedNothing

Pat was feeling haram, so Ben sat his infidel ass down and explained to him the groundbreaking philosophical developments unleashed by the Islamic world. Centuries before Christian thinkers like Thomas Aquinas and Albertus Magnus (Latin for Fat Albert) were even potty trained, Muslim philosophers from Spain to Persia shed a guiding light on the other wise very Dark Ages. This dream team includes the likes of Avicenna (Ibn Sina), Ibn Arabi, and Al Ghazali, who expounded on the metaphysical & philosophical underpinnings of the hottest new super-religion on the scene: Islam. Learn about the Tawwhid, Sufi mysticism, and Al Ghazali's nutty theory of occasionalism in this epic TWO PARTER! Buckle up, buttercup, and don't forget to check out our Patreon (patreon.com/ILearnedNothing) for some sweet sweet extra credit.

Pat was feeling pretty self-conscious so Ben explains it's because of all his damn Qualia, stupid! Qualia is a concept in philosophy of mind referring to that mushy notion of what it's like to experience something, like the color red, the smell of wet ham, or feeling cool as hell. It's that certain je ne sais quois of how life feels as our subjective consciousness navigates the objective world. Do they only apply to emotions? Sense-data? Can they be further applied to thoughts, memories? Some cheeky pricks (*cough* Daniel Dennett *cough*) don't even believe they exist? Can you believe that? So tune in folks. Keep on thinking hard. Oh also patreon.com/ILearnedNothing for more stuff.

Pat was feeling trapped so Ben tuned him on to the wacky linguistic thought experiment developed by Ben's Main Man Ludwig Wittgenstein. Are humans capable of having a private language? Not just shibboleth for your crew but a private language only YOU know about? Wittgenstein says NO, you idiot. And it has something to do with a beetle in a box. Fuck you.

Pat was feeling sluggish so Ben ramps him up to accept the new outrun philosophy of Accelerationism all over his face. The WisdomBois begin with a quick recap of Gilles Deleuze and Felix Guatarri's theory of deterritorialization and cap it off with a snappy rundown of Marx's thoughts on Late Capitalism and its prophesied self-destruction before exploring Accelarationism's darker, right-wing side espoused by British philosopher/twat Nick Land. This one's a wild one so strap in. We love you. Also, check out our Patreon: patreon.com/ILearnedNothing.

Pat was feeling shrewd so Ben clued him in on the HOTTEST ethical theory of the past 3 centuries: Utilitarianism! That's right folks. Ben and Pat are tackling Utilitarianism and you better believe it's a motherfucking two-parter. Conceived by the debauched mind of Jeremy Bentham and developed by English philosopher, MP, and fiend John Stuart Mill, Utilitarian is a consequrentialist theory of morality that operates under the central axiom that "it is the greatest happiness of the greatest number that is the measure of right and wrong." Seems legit right? Except when you explore specific scenarios that highlight "the greater good" at the expense of individual dignity and suffering. Would you kill an innocent person to save the world? What if that person was your mom, you sick fuck? That's Utilitarianism. Strap in!

Pat once trusted the bedrock reliability of logic so Ben went ahead and shattered that nonsense by teaching him about The Liar's Paradox, the oldest, most stubborn, and most infuriating logical paradox in the history of paradoxes, SON! Check THIS out: "This sentence is false." Is the preceding sentence true? Or false? If it's true, then it's false. If it's false, then it's true. What the?! Tune in to find out how mad Pat get's as we try to solve this humdinger. Also, for more truth, knowledge, and righteousness, check out our Patreon: www.patreon.com/ILearnedNothing

Folks! Put on some sunscreen and pull out your floaties because Pat & Ben are taking you on a tropical, aquatic adventure! We're releasing one of our COVETED Patreon episodes so you can get a taste of what you've been missing. In this installment, Pat teaches Ben about possibly the most ludicrous experiment in the history of science. What happens when you mix a loony neuroscientist, a 22 year old intern, 3 dolphins, and the 1960s in a house full of water? Listen to find out! Spoilers: It gets very erotic. And, for just $5 a month, you can access hard-hitting exposés like this one every single week. Well how about that? Just join our Patreon at patreon.com/ILearnedNothing

Pat was feeling epiphanic so Ben brings him into the fold. The Religious Fold, that is! Don't worry. We haven't gone religious. But Pat couldn't help ask: What does is it all mean, Basil? And why is God involved? It seems that we as humans always need to talk about the Great Beyond, even if (or especially because) we claim to not believe in it. What a world! Listen in as Ben and Pat talk about what and why we believe in Him, Her, They, It and whatever you call Religion! (tl;dr Roman Catholicism is the correct religion.)