Seen with Pandora Morris

What do all mental health conditions actually have in common?On this episode of Seen, I sit down with Dr Dan Siegel, the psychiatrist who named the field of interpersonal neurobiology. He was the training director in child psychiatry at UCLA, he created the Wheel of Awareness practice, and he is the person who came up with the phrase window of tolerance. He has spent more than thirty years on one question: what actually is the mind?We go through what that looks like in real life. The Wheel of Awareness, and why uncertainty turns out to be another word for freedom. What the psilocybin research shows about a brain dropping out of its old high probability patterns. Temperament and personality, and the twelve year old client who told him OCD should really be called overactive checker deployment. Dan also explains the three things every child needs, which he calls seen, soothed and safe, and why repairing a rupture matters far more than getting it right first time. He says the research puts the number of children without secure attachment somewhere between 35 and 45 per cent.We also talk about dissociation, whether talking therapy always helps, and how the window of tolerance widens when somebody is willing to sit with you in the hard feeling.In this episode, you'll learn:- What integration means, and why Dan says every psychiatric condition shows a loss of it- The three things every child needs, and why repair matters more than getting it perfect- How shame convinces you that you are defective, and why that belief is not evidence- What the window of tolerance is, and how it widens when someone bears witness with youThis conversation stretched my thinking more than almost any I have had on this show. I hope it leaves you feeling a little less broken and a little more whole.Chapters:What Is The Mind, And Is It The Same As Your Brain? (00:00)Why Your Mind Is Not Only In Your Head (09:13)What Integration Means, And Why It Matters For Mental Health (16:04)Can You Rewire Your Brain After Years Of Struggle? (28:39)Seen, Soothed And Safe: What Every Child Needs (35:17)Surrender, Energy And What Spirituality Really Means (43:46)What is DID (49:46)What We Get Wrong About Living Well (58:53)This episode is for education only and isn't medical advice. We talk about eating disorders, OCD, trauma, dissociation and psychedelic research. If any of it feels close to home, please speak to your GP or a qualified therapist.Connect with Pandora Morris💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🌐 Website: Discover more about Pandora, explore past episodes, and find resources to support your wellbeing.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: Follow Pandora for meaningful conversations, personal insights, and updates from Seen.https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/🎧 Spotify: Follow Seen on Spotify and never miss a new episode.https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfa🍎 Apple Podcasts: Listen and subscribe to Seen on Apple Podcasts for more honest, thought-provoking conversations.https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

Why does overthinking feel like it’s solving a problem, when all it really does is send you round in circles?I’ve lived with OCD my whole life, which makes me an expert overthinker. For four years I’ve had the privilege of talking to experts about it on this show, and in this solo episode I’m sharing three tools they’ve taught me that actually help.I also tell you about the night a lovely evening with a friend turned into a full doom spiral on my way to the tube, and the message that proved my brain completely wrong. If you’ve ever stared at two blue ticks waiting for a reply, or replayed a conversation over and over, this one’s for you. You can’t think your way out of a thinking problem. The goal isn’t to stop thethoughts. It’s to stop feeding them.In this episode, you’ll learn:TimestampsIntroduction: Why You Can’t Think Your Way Out of Overthinking (00:00)Tip 1: Catch the Loop With 3 Questions (00:41)How One Goodbye Turned Into an Overthinking Spiral (01:04)Unanswered Messages and Fear of Rejection (02:50)Why Overthinking Is a Form of Self-Doubt (03:46)Tip 2: Give Your Worries a Time Slot (05:08)Why Everyone Else Seems Calmer Than You (06:06)Tip 3: Get Out of Your Head and Into the Room (07:19)Don’t Stop Your Thoughts, Stop Feeding Them (09:22)Recap and the 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Test (09:53)How to Notice the Positives Again (11:39)Join the community:💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life. https://substack.com/@seenwithpandoraNever miss an episode of SEEN! Listen to the podcast anytime, anywhere.Sotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfaAple Podcasts: htps://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453connect with Pandora Morris🌐Website: https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 instagram: https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.→ htps://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEEN:Hosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

How can you tell if you are coping or escaping?In this bonus episode of Seen, I’m back with Lauren McQuistin, author of How to Build a Life That You Don’t Want to Escape From. We pick up where the main episode left off.Lauren explains the difference between coping and escaping, and why shame keeps you stuck in a version of the past that no longer exists. She walks me through what recovery looks like day to day, from her first 10 minutes each morning to learning how to cook. She also shares how she sits with difficult emotions, by naming exactly what she feels and asking if she needs a fire or a blanket.If you feel stuck and don’t know where to start, Lauren’s advice is simple: start with the smallest change you can make.This episode is for education only and isn’t medical advice. We talk about addiction, eating disorders and suicidal thoughts. If any of it feels close to home, please speak to your GP or a qualified therapist.Connect with Pandora Morris💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🌐 Website: Discover more about Pandora, explore past episodes, and find resources to support your wellbeing.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: Follow Pandora for meaningful conversations, personal insights, and updates from Seen.https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/🎧 Spotify: Follow Seen on Spotify and never miss a new episode.https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfa🍎 Apple Podcasts: Listen and subscribe to Seen on Apple Podcasts for more honest, thought-provoking conversations.https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

What is dissociative identity disorder, and what does it actually feel like to live with?On this episode of Seen, I sit down with psychotherapist Sally Maslansky, author of the memoir A Brilliant Adaptation. Sally was 37 when she was diagnosed with DID, which was still called multiple personality disorder back then.We also discussed the difference between everyday dissociation and DID, why so many therapists still tell clients they cannot work with them if they dissociate in session, what Sally found when she finally looked at the DID conversation on TikTok and Instagram, and the day she drove past the house she grew up in and felt nothing but joy.In this episode, you'll learn:- What dissociative identity disorder is, and how it differs from the dissociation most of us experience- Why amnesia and losing time are often the clearest signs, not separate identities living separate lives- What disorganised attachment is, and why Sally calls DID a brilliant adaptation rather than a disorder- What helped Sally most in therapy, and where to start if you think you might have DIDAbout Sally Maslansky:Sally Maslansky is a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT) based in North Carolina and the author of A Brilliant Adaptation: How Dissociative Identity Disorder and the Power of the Therapeutic Bond Saved Me (New Harbinger, 2026). She was diagnosed at 37 with what was then called multiple personality disorder, and she worked with Dr Siegel for ten years. She went on to train as a therapist and works with adults and adoptive families. She has presented with Dr Siegel on dissociation, including at the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium, and she writes the Substack Making Sense.Connect with Sally Maslansky:https://sallymaslansky.com/ https://bsky.app/profile/sallymaslansky.bsky.social Join Sally’s community:https://makingsensewithsallymaslansky.substack.com/ Timestamps:Who Sally Maslansky Is, And What DID Means (00:00)What Are The Signs Of Dissociative Identity Disorder? (06:09)Can You Fully Recover From DID? (09:18)Why She Wrote A Brilliant Adaptation (14:09)Why So Many Therapists Get Dissociation Wrong (17:38)Everyday Dissociation And DID: What Is The Difference? (25:54)DID On TikTok: Self-Diagnosis And Social Media (31:24)Why Trauma Does Not Have To Be A Lifetime Prison (34:17)Implicit Memory: Why The Past Can Feel Like Now (38:54)What To Do If You Think You Might Have DID (40:53)Join the community:💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.→ https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🎧 Never miss an episode of SEEN! Listen to the podcast anytime, anywhere.Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfaApple Podcasts:https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453Connect with Pandora Morris🌐 Website: https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.→ https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

Have you ever had a setback in recovery and thought, “This is as good as it’s ever going to get”? Someone who loved me once said exactly that to me. Five years later, I’m still not fixed, and I’m freer than I’ve ever been. I’ve lived with OCD and an eating disorder for most of my life, and I’m still in the messy middle, so this is an honest one.Join the community:💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🌐 Website: Discover more about Pandora, explore past episodes, and find resources to support your wellbeing.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: Follow Pandora for meaningful conversations, personal insights, and updates from Seen.https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/🎧 Spotify: Follow Seen on Spotify and never miss a new episode.https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfa🍎 Apple Podcasts: Listen and subscribe to Seen on Apple Podcasts for more honest, thought-provoking conversations.https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

Do you ever get stuck overthinking, going round and round in circles and only feeling worse? In this Seen Session, I’m joined by clinical psychologist and bestselling author Dr Jessamy Hibberd to talk about why trying to think our way out of anxiety so often backfires, how healthy reflection differs from rumination, and why modern life is such a recipe for overthinking. Jessamy shares a simple tool to set up in advance for when you feel a spiral coming. She also shares her own non-negotiables for getting out of her head and back into her life.Join the Community:💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🌐 Website: Discover more about Pandora, explore past episodes, and find resources to support your wellbeing.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: Follow Pandora for meaningful conversations, personal insights, and updates from Seen.https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/🎧 Spotify: Follow Seen on Spotify and never miss a new episode.https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfa🍎 Apple Podcasts: Listen and subscribe to Seen on Apple Podcasts for more honest, thought-provoking conversations.https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

Why do we sabotage the things we want most?On this episode of Seen, I sit down with Lauren McQuistin, former Yale opera singer and author of How to Build a Life That You Don't Want to Escape From. Lauren has been sober for over eight years. She opens up about drinking before the auditions that mattered most, why she ruined her own chances on purpose, and what recovery really looks like.In this episode, you'll learn:- Why we sabotage our own success- Why stopping a behaviour is not the same as recovering from it- How to challenge shame, starting very small- Why there is no such thing as healedThank you Lauren for being so open.Chapters:Building A Life You Want To Escape (00:00)Hiding Behind Success (02:12)Drinking At 13 (06:56)Getting Sober At 25 (08:54)Being Ready To Accept Help (10:36)Self-Sabotage At Yale (13:51)Fear Of Failure And Success (16:32)How To Challenge Shame (20:37)Why We All Want To Escape (25:50)Loneliness And Screens (30:36)There Is No Healed (34:22) Stop Judging Your Past Self (40:53)If You Feel Beyond Saving (43:41)When Lauren Felt Seen (45:37)This episode talks openly about addiction, self-harm and eating disorders. If any of this is close to home, please speak to your GP or a support service such as Mind or Beat.Connect with Pandora Morris💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🌐 Website: Discover more about Pandora, explore past episodes, and find resources to support your wellbeing.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: Follow Pandora for meaningful conversations, personal insights, and updates from Seen.https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/🎧 Spotify: Follow Seen on Spotify and never miss a new episode.https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfa🍎 Apple Podcasts: Listen and subscribe to Seen on Apple Podcasts for more honest, thought-provoking conversations.https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

Do you ever get stuck in a spiral of intrusive thoughts and can’t step away from them, even when you know they aren’t true?In this solo episode of Seen, I’m sharing what more than 25 years of living with severe OCD has taught me about handling intrusive thoughts. I’m not a therapist, and I’m not claiming to be an expert. These are the tools that have helped me most, and I hope they help you too.Almost everyone has intrusive thoughts, whether or not they have OCD. The thoughts themselves aren’t the problem. What matters is what we do with them. I talk openly about my own experience: the bedtime prayers I felt I had to repeat for hours as a child, the fear that I’d done something terrible, the contamination fears, and the all-or-nothing thoughts I still have around food and exercise.Join the community:💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.→ https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🎧 Never miss an episode of SEEN! Listen to the podcast anytime, anywhere.Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfaApple Podcasts:https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453ABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.Connect with Pandora Morris🌐 Website: https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.→ https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resources

Where do you start when life feels like too much?On this bonus episode of Seen, I'm joined again by Toni Tone, author of Soft Life. We pick up where our main conversation left off, with the small, practical shifts that make life feel a little more gentle.Toni shares why she'd start with what you can control and what you can stop doing, not with something new. We talk about why rest doesn't have to be earned, why sitting still can feel so uncomfortable, and the phone boundary most of us need. She also gives me a brilliant question for telling a real want from a "should".In this episode, you'll learn:- Where to start when you feel overwhelmed, and why stopping is easier than starting- Why rest doesn't have to be earned, and why resting can feel so uncomfortable- The one question that shows whether you really want something, or just feel you should- Simple ways to make your life 10% softer this week, from sleep to time with friendsChapters: Feeling Overwhelmed? Where To Start (00:00) Why Rest Doesn't Have To Be Earned (01:11) How To Learn Contentment And Stop Always Striving (02:51) The Boundary Most Of Us Need: Using Our Phones Less (03:58) Should Vs Want: How To Tell The Difference (05:58) When A Should Is Still Worth Doing (08:15) How To Make Your Life 10% Softer This Week (10:12)Connect with Pandora Morris💌 Substack: Subscribe to Pandora's newsletter for honest reflections and thoughtful conversations about mental health, wellbeing, and life.→ https://substack.com/@seenwithpandora🎧 Never miss an episode of SEEN! Listen to the podcast anytime, anywhere.Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1Ku2D90pNwBLM17HvLxlB1?si=fbcad6ff3bb24bfaApple Podcasts:https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/seen-with-pandora-morris/id1649515453Connect with Pandora Morris🌐 Website: https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/seenwithpandora/💛 Recommended Resources: Explore Pandora's collection of mental health and wellbeing resources for additional guidance and support.→ https://www.seenwithpandoramorris.com/resourcesABOUT SEENHosted by Pandora Morris, Seen is a podcast featuring bold, brave, and honest conversations about mental health, wellbeing, relationships, and the experiences that shape our lives. Through personal stories and expert insights, Seen creates space for understanding, connection, and healing.

How do you actually stop overthinking?On this episode of Seen, I sit down with clinical psychologist Dr Jessamy Hibberd, author of The Overthinking Cure. Her book opened my eyes to so many tools I had never thought of.Jessamy calls overthinking the problem that disguises itself as the solution. It feels useful, but she says the research shows it does not solve problems, and it should come with a health warning. We talk about rumination and worry, what happens in your brain when your mood drops, the expectation gap, perfectionism, and why modern life makes it so easy to overthink.Then we get practical. Jessamy explains what a doom spiral is, why you need to shift your mood before you try to think your way out, and why the research suggests it takes only about eight minutes. She walks through the five steps from her book and explains why clarity comes from action, not before it.In this episode, you'll learn:- Why overthinking feels productive, and what the research actually says about it- The difference between rumination, worry and healthy reflection- How to shift your mood first, and why Jessamy says it takes about eight minutes- The five steps to breaking the cycle, from noticing a thought to facing the fearIf your own mind has felt exhausting lately, I hope this one gives you somewhere gentle to start.Chapters: What Overthinking Is, And When It Turns Destructive (00:00) Why Overthinking Is The Problem Disguised As The Solution (02:45) What Happens In Your Brain When Your Mood Drops (04:52) The Link With Anxiety, And How To Spot Your Triggers (06:29) Why We Reach For Food, Busyness Or Addiction Instead (09:05) Comparison, Control And Why Modern Life Fuels Overthinking (10:31) Why Your Predictions Are Rarely Right, And Going Anyway (16:13) Doom Spirals: What They Are And How To Notice One (19:31) How To Break A Spiral, And Why It Only Takes 8 Minutes (21:14) Why Overthinking Preys On What Matters Most To You (23:14) The Spotlight Of Attention, And Why Thoughts Aren't Facts (29:16) The 5 Steps To Breaking The Cycle (34:19) Rebuilding Trust In Yourself, One Decision At A Time (38:58) Can An Overthinker Change, And What If You Feel Trapped (43:06) When Jessamy Felt Truly Seen (45:30)This episode is for education only and isn't medical advice. We touch on anxiety, addiction and disordered eating. If any of it feels close to home, please speak to your GP or a qualified therapist.