Confessions of a Grieving Mother

Parenting after loss can bring a unique mix of love, gratitude, fear, and grief. In this topical conversation, Tracy and Khristina talk about how pregnancy and infant loss continues to shape the way we parent our living children. From navigating everyday moments and milestones to managing fear, talking about the baby who died, and balancing gratitude with grief, they explore the many ways loss shows up in family life. Whether you're parenting after loss or supporting someone who is, this conversation is a reminder that you can deeply love the children in your arms while continuing to miss the child who isn't here. Both can exist, and there is room for all of it.

Type of loss: Second trimester lossMore about this story: In this episode, we talk with Melia Breed as she shares the story of her daughter, McKenna, and the heartbreak of losing her at 18 weeks and 4 days into pregnancy.After experiencing a premature birth during her second pregnancy, Melia's third pregnancy came with additional monitoring and high-risk appointments. At what was supposed to be a routine appointment, Melia and her husband received the devastating news that their baby no longer had a heartbeat.Melia walks us through the shock of that moment, the experience of being induced, and the heartbreaking reality of delivering her daughter knowing she wouldn't be bringing her home. She shares openly about the moments that forever changed her and the deep grief that followed.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.We close our series with Finding Purpose in the Pain.After losing a baby, the idea of finding purpose can feel impossible, especially in the early days of grief. There is no need to rush toward meaning or make sense of something that never should have happened.Purpose can look different for everyone, and sometimes it simply means continuing to carry our babies with us as we take the next step.As we close out Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, we hope this conversation offers a little hope to those who are still finding their way and reminds every grieving parent that there is no timeline for healing, and there is no wrong way to carry your baby’s memory forward.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.This week, we are talking about something that can be difficult to navigate after loss: boundaries.Grief can change what we need from the people around us. Situations that once felt ordinary, like pregnancy announcements, baby showers, holidays, or family gatherings, can suddenly feel incredibly difficult.Setting a boundary is not about shutting people out. Sometimes, it is simply a way of giving ourselves the care and space we need.If setting boundaries has been difficult for you, we hope this conversation helps you feel a little less alone and reminds you that it is okay to take care of your heart.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.This week, we are pausing to remember our babies and celebrate the lives they lived, no matter how short their time with us may have been.In this special Wave of Light episode, we talk about Remembering Our Babies: Honoring Their Lives and Their Legacy.We explore the different ways families continue to honor their babies, from saying their names and creating traditions to remembering important dates and including them in their family’s story. We also talk about what it means to be a parent after loss and the lasting impact our babies can have on our lives.During Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, we hope this conversation serves as a gentle reminder that our babies are worth remembering, their lives matter, and their stories deserve to be told.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.This week, we are talking about The Loneliness of Loss: Finding Connection After Baby Loss.Pregnancy and infant loss can leave parents feeling incredibly alone. Sometimes it can feel like the world keeps moving while you are trying to find your way through a loss that changed everything.If you have ever felt alone in your grief, we hope this episode reminds you that your feelings are valid, your story matters, and there are people who understand.

Throughout the month of October, Confessions of a Grieving Mother is honoring Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month with a special five-part panel series exploring the many different parts of grief, healing, and remembering our babies.We begin our series with Making Space for Grief.After losing a baby, grief can take up more space than we ever expected. In this conversation, we talk about what it means to give ourselves permission to grieve, especially in a world that often encourages us to return to “normal” before we are ready.If you are grieving the loss of a baby, we hope this conversation reminds you that there is no right timeline for grief and that you deserve the space to grieve in whatever way you need.

Type of loss: SIDSMore about this story: In this episode, we talk with Kristen Payne and Spencer Johnston to hear the story of their son, Derrik.Derrik was born happy and healthy on June 1. Then, in the early morning hours of June 7, everything changed. Kristen woke to feed her baby and realized he wasn’t responding. In a moment of unimaginable fear, she called 911 while Spencer began CPR. Despite their efforts, Derrik was pronounced dead in the emergency room at 4:30 a.m.Kristen and Spencer open up about the devastating loss of their son and the profound impact it had on their lives and their relationship. Their grief ultimately changed the course of their partnership, and they now navigate life separately while continuing to co-parent their living child.

Type of loss: Neonatal lossMore about this story: In this episode of Confessions of a Grieving Mother, we talk with Kim Setterlund to hear the story of her son, Dylan, who was born at 22 weeks and 5 days.Kim shares the unexpected circumstances that led to her premature labor after a placental abruption while she was working at a daycare. Dylan fought bravely during his time in the NICU. Despite his strength, Dylan developed necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC), a serious intestinal condition that ultimately left his doctors with no surgical option that could save his life. Kim and her family were faced with the heartbreaking decision to remove Dylan from life support.

More about this story: In this episode, we talk with Tabbitha Swisher about her journey to becoming a surrogate after experiencing the loss of her son, Rosco.After walking through the unimaginable grief of losing her baby, Tabbitha found herself facing a very different kind of pregnancy journey: carrying a baby for another family. She opens up about the complicated emotions that came with making the decision to become a surrogate, including the joy of helping another family grow alongside the fears, triggers, and grief that can accompany pregnancy after loss.