What to Do When Everyone Thinks You're Great - But You Feel Like a Failure

This episode is sponsored by Musician's Maintenance - safe, simple, maintenance exercises that specifically address the muscle groups that matter most for musicians.* * *Ever have one of those days where it feels like the more you practice, the worse you sound?Or perhaps you've had a lesson with a student, where the more you try to help, the more frustrated and overwhelmed they seem to get?Sometimes it only feels like we're getting worse or making things worse, and the reality is that this is just part of the learning process. Kind of like what happens when you clean out your closet, and have to make things messier, before you can make it better.But sometimes this is not just in our imagination, and we could actually be regressing or slowing down the learning process! 😳 Fortunately, there's a very specific reason why this might be happening. As well as specific strategies we can use to get around this issue.Get all the nerdy details right here:Feel Like You’re Getting Worse? Here’s Why That May Not Just Be Your Imagination.* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

As you might imagine, there are a ton of research papers out there.Some are exceedingly useful. Others are interesting, but of questionable usefulness (like the one which explores the physics of buttered toast tending to land butter-side down).And then there are those which might seem silly at first, but make you think, and end up being quite useful (like the one which found that cows which have been given names produce more milk).So I thought it might be fun to look at a study in this latter category today.It’s a study that involves cute kitten and puppy photos, but is fundamentally about enhancing focus and performance on tasks that involve fine motor skills and attention.So if you find that your attention tends to wander in the practice room, and you could use a little boost in your focus from time to time, this study might give you another tool in your attention control toolbox to try out.Get all the nerdy details here:An Unconventional Way to Enhance Your Focus in the Practice Room* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

This episode is sponsored by Musician's Maintenance - safe, simple, maintenance exercises that specifically address the muscle groups that matter most for musicians.* * *When you think of your favorite musicians or performers, how much fun do you think they’re having on stage? And how much fun do you think they have in the practice room?Wait...fun in the practice room is allowed? 🤨I recently edited and polished up an old 2016 interview from the archives with violinist Frank Almond, who shares some of the ways in which he integrates fun and play into his practice routine.It’s reassuring to hear why this should not only be allowed, but encouraged. So if your practice sessions tend to be all work and no play, I hope this episode will not only give you permission to experience more joy in your daily practice, but also give you some ideas on how to make that happen.Get all the nerdy details here: Frank Almond: On Work, Fun, and the Importance of Both in Dealing with Adversity* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

Whether it's our children, our students, or our pets, I think it's pretty natural and automatic to want to offer praise for a job well done.We're happy for them, and pleased to see them do well. But what happens when they fall short in some way? Whether it's a subpar performance, a mediocre grade, or a mistake on the carpet, does our praise help to offset the pain (or shame) of these moments? Or do things not work quite this way?A 2014 study reveals some interesting details on the specific kind of praise that works best, and the kind that can actually increase a child or student's feelings of shame - especially if they are already struggling with confidence and self-esteem.Get all the nerdy details here:How the Wrong Kind of Praise Could Increase a Student’s Feelings of Shame* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

This episode is sponsored by Musician's Maintenance - safe, simple, maintenance exercises that specifically address the muscle groups that matter most for musicians.* * *Much like hair, there are good practice days, and there are not-so-good practice days. 🤣The bad practice days can be filled with frustration, irritation, and maybe even a hint of shame. They can make you lose hope, question whether you have what it takes, and feel like giving up. At least for the day, if not sometimes longer.On the flip side, the good practice days, can be pretty terrific. You feel confident, capable, and think to yourself, yes, you do deserve to have some guacamole on your burrito bowl!How can we have more of those good days?Well, it seems that an external focus of attention during practice could make a real difference.What does that mean exactly?Click below to get all the nerdy details:Learn Faster by Thinking Less?* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

When it comes to improving technical aspects of your playing, it's easy to assume that this is mostly a physical issue. Where the solution is to do more practice, and more "correct" repetitions. But what if part of the problem was mental?A 2009 golf study (and many others both before and since!) suggest that what we're thinking about when we're playing can affect our accuracy quite a bit. And that the thing we think we should be thinking about may actually be the least helpful!Get all the nerdy details here:To Play More Accurately, Change Your Focus?* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

This episode is sponsored by Musician's Maintenance - safe, simple, maintenance exercises that specifically address the muscle groups that matter most to musicians.* * *I think we've all been told that we should look at the conductor or at our musical colleagues in chamber music settings. But how important is this really?Isn't it enough to have good ears, and simply listen really attentively? Or do we miss out on something when we're more focused on the music on the stand than our music-making partners?A study of the Afiara and Cecilia string quartets provide some clues.Get all the nerdy details here;Why Good Ensemble Playing May Require More Than Just Your Ears* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

For many toddlers, performing seems to come naturally and easily, whether it's an impromptu dance performance in the living room or comedy routine from the back seat of the car.But as we get older, we can start to get self-conscious and worry about negative judgment or what other people will think.Which makes us want to avoid performing. Which only makes performing seem scarier, gives us fewer opportunities to practice getting better at performing, and could lead to more negative experiences on stage, and more avoidance.So how do we interuppt this cycle? if we're uncomfortable playing for an audience, how can we practice performing and build up more confidence and positive performance experiences? Short of just doing it anyway and hoping for the best?A 2014 study about young readers (it's more relevant than you might think) may provide some clues!Get all the nerdy details and this week’s practice hack right here:A Gentle Way to Help Kids (or Adults) Build Performance Confidence?* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

Ever find yourself being distracted in the practice room by random thoughts and worries?Like worrying about all the other music that you need to learn. Or the entrance you missed in the last rehearsal. Or whether you're prepared for the upcoming SAT's.Like in-laws who live across the street, these worrisome thoughts like to spontaneously pop into our personal mental space at the most inconvenient times, and make it difficult to focus effectively on the thing we're actually doing in that moment.And there is an emotional cost too, as worrying can make us more stressed, anxious, and tense.So...is there anything we can do to reduce these worries and get better at single-tasking and focusing on the thing in front of us at the moment?Get all the nerdy details right here:A Simple Strategy for Reducing Worries and Practicing With More Focus* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa

When I praise the family dog for doing a good thing, I'm not sure if it matters what words I say to him. He seems equally excited and happily wags his tail whether I say "good boy!" or "bad doggie!" as long as I use the same tone of voice.Of course, people are different, and the words we use do matter in the feedback we offer. So if we're trying to build up a student's confidence, and embolden them to take on new challenges, what kind of praise works best?A 2014 study suggests that not all praise has the same effect. And that even if well-intentioned, one particular type of praise can backfire and even heighten a student's fear of failure. 😳Get all the nerdy details right here:Why the Wrong Kind of Praise Could Heighten a Student's Fear of Failure* * *Have you ever wondered why it is that things often sound better at home than they do on stage? If you’ve been confused (and frustrated) by the inconsistency of your performances, I put together a FREE 4-minute quiz called the Mental Skills Audit, which will help you pinpoint your mental strengths and weaknesses, and figure out what exactly to adjust and tweak in your preparation for more consistently optimal performances. It’s 100% free, takes only 4 minutes, and you’ll get a downloadable PDF with a personalized breakdown of where you stand in six key mental skill areas. You'll also get the Pressure Proof Practice Challenge, a free 1-week email course where you'll learn specific practice strategies that will help you perform your best, even under pressure. Take the quiz here: bulletproofmusician.com/msa