Ep 189 Emotional Banking

Marriage is hard and Sophia, a 14-year-old from NY, wants some answers to what she has been learning. Zach answers her questions and is able to learn a bit about the life and relationships of "kids today".  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After a false start recording, Zach and Laura kick off the episode with some intros for new listeners. They go on to discuss the concept of "being triggered". Why does it happen? And what can you do about it? Sponsor: Target the root cause of aging with OneSkin. Get 15% off by using code MTR at https://oneskin.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After some discussion of Ted Lasso and Gray's Anatomy, Zach and Laura hear from Charisse Cooke https://charissecooke.com/ about her work and new book The Attachment Solution. Charisse shares about the origin of the styles and how they deeply impact our relationships. You will end this episode with some great tools to better understand yourself and your partner. Sponsor: Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to  https://rocketmoney.com/mtr Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach wishes his brother a happy birthday. Laura reminisces about old crushes.  Zach presents a concept about seeing greater options in your potential responses to your partner and constantly choosing the response that moves you away from conflict and toward connection and intimacy. Sponsor: Paired. Download the PAIRED app at https://www.paired.com/MTR  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Laura admits to a potential crime in the most privileged setting possible. Zach drops his wife off for surgery after an argument in the car. After starting strong they return to your questions. The answers to these questions from individual listeners contain insight that will benefit all relationships. Sponsor: Target the root cause of aging with OneSkin. Get 15% off by using code MTR at https://oneskin.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach and Laura welcome spring by answering a couple of questions listeners have sent in. They share both their clinical perspective as well as their personal experiences in this first in an AMA series. Sponsor: Target the root cause of aging with OneSkin. Get 15% off by using code MTR at https://oneskin.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach and Laura chat with author Matt Fray https://matthewfray.com/ about his book This is How Your Marriage Ends https://matthewfray.com/order-book/. Matt's wisdom was hard-earned after a divorce that forced him to look deeply at the skills and habits he lacked in his marriage. You will end this episode with insights that will improve your relationship. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Laura is working to get in the best shape of her life. Zach is celebrating women and recognizing he sometimes gets the Man Flu.  They share some great resources that can support you as you seek to grow your relationship. Sponsor: Paired. Download the PAIRED app at https://www.paired.com/MTR Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Laura is moving back into her house. Zach recaps his trip to Costa Rica to receive training from Esther Perel and Terry Real. Sponsor: Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to  https://rocketmoney.com/mtr Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Zach and Laura are both seeing ADHD be raised as a topic, if not an issue, in their practices. So they are delighted to get to sit down with Melissa Orlov to learn how to address its impact on a marriage. Melissa is a leading expert on the impacts of ADHD on marriage and relationships, the author of The ADHD Effect on Marriage, and the founder of ADHD & Marriage. Their discussion is insightful for those in a marriage impacted by ADHD, or anyone interested in this underdiagnosed neurodiverity. Sponsor: Target the root cause of aging with OneSkin. Get 15% off by using code MTR at https://oneskin.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices