231: The Danger of Holding Out for "The One"

So you just realized you actually like someone?  Hold up a second . . .   When we fall for someone in the early stages of dating, it’s very easy to drop our standards and lose sight of our boundaries. We check our texts constantly. We cancel other plans for them. We agree to live on their schedule.    This situation is especially dangerous for people who have a more anxious attachment style and tend to respond to relationship uncertainty by bending over backwards to keep someone happy.   In today’s new episode, I explore how different attachment styles respond in this situation, and how you can attract a healthy relationship where your standards and boundaries won’t be trampled. ►► Get Vulnerable Stories, Real Insights and Practical Tools Delivered Straight to Your Inbox Every Friday. Sign Up Now For My Weekly Newsletter, The 3 Relationships.com → http://www.The3Relationships.com ►► Get My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com

There’s a line from the movie Vanilla Sky that I’ve always loved. It’s when Tom Cruise’s character realizes: “The little things... There’s nothing bigger, is there?”  That’s often true in attraction too.    So many people are looking for the huge epiphany, instead of the subtle-yet-powerful changes to their behavior that can skyrocket their results.  As you’ll hear in this episode, turning someone’s head doesn’t have to be complicated. --- ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com  

Over the past week, so many of you have expressed how much Angela’s story in my new book, Love Life, touched you deeply (in the chapter titled “Have Hard Conversations”). So this week I thought I’d share the actual interview with her from my Live Retreat. I’ve found that one of the biggest confidence-killers in dating happens when we dwell on the reasons why someone may not be attracted to us. Our looks, our age, our past, even the fact that we have kids—the fear of rejection for who we are can stop us before we get started. Angela’s story is one of the most impactful I’ve heard on confidence and insecurity, and I think you’ll love hearing it in her own words. ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com ►► Transform Your Relationship with Life in 6 Magical Days. Learn More About My Retreat at. . . → http://www.MHRetreat.com

Labels sometimes take longer to come than the feelings themselves, and our fear of getting hurt can make us all reluctant to be vulnerable and express what we feel.  As a result, so many people come to me asking . . . “Are we living in a time when people just don’t want to commit anymore?” “How do you know if someone is ready?”   These two questions pop up A LOT, and that got me thinking about my own thoughts on the subject . . .   In this rewind episode, I give you 11 specific signs to look for to determine if someone is serious about you. --- ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com

Today Matt sits down with Lisa Bilyeu, author of Radical Confidence, to talk about how to escape our toxic cycles in relationships, overcoming low self-esteem, communicating with your partner (even when you have different love languages), attracting the right person, and how to figure out who is right for you. ►► Follow Lisa @LisaBilyeu ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com

When we like someone, it’s tempting to move fast, let our emotions take over and simply do what feels good. But in this frenzy of excitement we can inadvertently end up on a path we don’t want to be on… In this clip I answer a question from someone who didn’t want to repeat the last 2 years of her life, which she spent in a ‘friends with benefits’ situation.   ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com

You’ve been on a date or two with someone and things are going pretty well. Then suddenly they ask you, “Wanna come over to my place and watch a movie tonight?” Is it too soon? What if you like this person but you feel it’s moving a little too fast? In today’s video, I share 5 things you need to know before you “Netflix and chill” if you want more than just a casual hookup. ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com 

We may not realise it, but many of us subconsciously hide from real love because it forces us to be honest and show who we really are. And when we get threatened, we either go cold, hide, or lash out with passive aggression.  If you've struggled with emotional unavailability or always choosing the wrong people, this might be why... ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com

My brother and I sit down to talk about why I wrote my new book "Love Life", how dating has changed in the last 10 years, choosing the right person, and how to break toxic cycles in relationships.  ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com 

Friends...it's finally happening :) ►► Get Your FREE Ticket to Find Your Person LIVE on May 4 PLUS a Chance to Win a 1:1 with Matthew & SO Much More! Order Your Copy of Love Life to Enter the Love Life Giveaway at. . . → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com