Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

If you've read Feeding the Mouth That Bites You and thought, “Well, that would have been helpful five years ago,” this episode is for you! Today, we're tackling one of the most common questions we receive: Is it too late to start Planned Emancipation if your teenager is already 16, 17, or even out of the house?Dr. Ken and Cynthia discuss why there's no need to panic and cram five years of parenting wisdom into the next six months, why waiting until your teen is "ready" to handle freedom might be missing the point, and how admitting you've gotten a few things wrong can actually work in your favor. We're also talking about the differences between strong-willed and passive teenagers, why control and influence aren't the same thing, and why parents might be giving themselves a little too much credit (and blame) for how their kids turn out.Whether you're starting late, starting over, or realizing you've been doing a little more parenting than your teenager actually needs, we've got plenty to talk about today.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today, Dr. Ken and Cynthia are talking about one of the most important parts of planned emancipation: the PR campaign. It's not just about giving our teenagers more freedom and responsibility, but making sure they know we see them as young adults, not children.From video game limits and sibling relationships to including teenagers in family decisions, Dr. Ken explains how small changes in the way we communicate can make a big difference in how our teenagers respond to us.We also tackle what happens when your teenager isn't acting remotely like an adult—or, even worse, seems perfectly happy letting you do everything for them. 😂 Plus, Dr. Ken shares what he's learned after years of helping families navigate planned emancipation and why parents need to let go of the pressure to guarantee how their kids turn out.It's a great reminder that our goal isn't just to get our teenagers ready to leave home, but to build a healthy relationship with them that lasts long after they do.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Is your teenager just moody, or is there something more going on? And when did we start calling every difficult emotion a "chemical imbalance"?Today, Dr. Ken and Cynthia are talking about teenage moodiness, anxiety, depression, and whether we've become too quick to medicalize the normal struggles of adolescence. Dr. Ken explains why the popular idea of a chemical imbalance isn't as scientifically established as we've been led to believe—and why medication can still be helpful in certain situations.We also get practical about how parents can tell the difference between normal teenage moodiness and something that needs professional attention. Plus, why it matters whether your teenager is struggling at school, with friends, and in other areas of life—or if they just seem to be miserable whenever they're around you. 😂It's a helpful conversation about knowing when to seek help, when to give your teenager some space, and why not every bad mood needs a diagnosis.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

There is a LOT of parenting advice out there right now—and not all of it is bad. The problem is what happens when we start piecing together a little calm parenting, a little connection parenting, a little neurodivergence content, and whatever else showed up in our feed that week.Dr. Ken and Cynthia talk about why parents need to understand the bigger philosophy behind the advice they’re taking in, especially when raising teens and young adults.They also explain why the Feeding the Mouth approach works best when you stay consistent with it: your teenager is moving toward adulthood and autonomy, and your job is to steadily work your way out of managing their life.You can learn from lots of good sources along the way—but if every new idea causes you to rethink the whole plan, you may end up working against the very independence you’re trying to build.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The recent case out of Cornell has brought up some really hard conversations for parents of teens and college students.Dr. Ken and Cynthia talk about whether parents should bring cases like this up with their kids, how much detail is appropriate, and how to talk about alcohol, consent, and safety without turning it into a giant lecture.They also get into the importance of teaching our kids to step in when something isn’t right—even if it means calling an adult, upsetting a friend, or being the unpopular one in the room.It’s a heavy topic, but also one that opens the door to some necessary conversations. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Dr. Ken’s least favorite parenting word may officially be “dysregulated”—which is unfortunate, because that’s exactly what we’re talking about this week.What happens when our teen gets worked up and we match their intensity? Or when one particular kid knows exactly how to push every button we have? Cynthia and Dr. Ken talk about anger, overreacting, emotional parenting, and how our own upbringing can shape the way we respond to our kids.If you’ve ever walked away from an interaction with your teen thinking, “Well... I could have handled that better,” this episode is for you.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you walking on eggshells around your teen? Lecturing when you meant to have a conversation? Reminding them of everything because you’re afraid they’ll drop the ball—or getting pulled too far into problems they need to learn to handle themselves? You’re not alone. Parenting teenagers has a funny way of bringing out communication habits we swore we’d never have.This week, Dr. Ken and Cynthia unpack four common communication pitfalls: the Path of Least Resistance Parent, the Parent Struggling to Stay in Their Lane, the TED Talk Parent, and the Reminder Machine.If communication with your teen feels tense, exhausting, or just plain ineffective, this episode will help you recognize what may be getting in the way—and hopefully laugh a little at yourself along the way.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How much freedom should parents actually give their teenagers?Doing their own laundry. Choosing what they wear. Picking their friends. Dating someone you’re not crazy about. Spending their own money. And yes… even tattoos and piercings.This week, Dr. Ken Wilgus and Cynthia Yanof are back for Part 2 of their conversation about reasonable expectations—and what it really looks like to “hand the bar over” as kids get older.They cover laundry and appearance, tattoos and piercings, friendships and dating, money, and honesty—along with the bigger question underneath all of it: When should parents step in, and when is it time to let go?Cynthia also has to rethink her longtime “no tattoos on our payroll” policy, and Dr. Ken talks about why teens sometimes need room to make their own decisions and experience the outcome.If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re letting go too much—or still trying to control too much—this episode is for you.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How much should parents actually expect from their teenagers?Good grades. A clean room. Trying hard in sports. Going to church. Being grateful. Making good choices. And preferably doing all of it with a great attitude. 😂This week, Dr. Ken Wilgus and Cynthia Yanof are talking about unrealistic expectations—and whether giving teens more independence means parents are somehow lowering the bar.Spoiler alert: Dr. Ken says parents aren’t necessarily lowering the bar. They’re handing the bar over to their teen.They cover grades, sports and activities, church and faith, and even gratitude—along with why constantly managing kids toward success can sometimes backfire when those kids eventually leave home and have to manage life for themselves.And yes, somewhere in there Cynthia tells the story of discovering ants in her child’s bed thanks to an entire summer’s worth of secret snacks. So clearly, they are not advocating for zero expectations. And stay tuned—there are plenty more expectations to tackle, next week on Part 2 they will cover things like money, laundry, friends and dating, honesty, clothes, tattoos, piercings, and more.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Meta is rolling out major new restrictions for users under 18 on Instagram and Facebook, and Dr. Ken was fired up enough about it that we interrupted our Parenting Pitfalls series to talk about it. After comparing our own slightly horrifying screen-time numbers, we dig into the new limits on usage, overnight access, notifications, like counts, age verification, filters, and parental supervision.But the bigger question is what parents do with all of this. Dr. Ken explains why these changes give parents some much-needed backup when it comes to setting limits—and why they also create a great opening for better conversations with our kids. Because for the first time, it’s not just parents saying social media might be too much. Meta is saying it too.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy