The Fun Road with Kass & Steve

We've been so conditioned to think about others first, that we've started to believe that prioritizing our own wants, desires, and needs makes us a bad person. Being selfish is viewed as a negative thing in our society and being labeled as selfless is almost worn like a badge of honor, regardless of what it costs the individual. We’re here today to flip the script on that thinking! Being selfish isn’t always bad and being selfless isn’t always good! It is actually possible to practice a healthy level of selfishness in your life. Being healthy selfish is all about meeting your own needs first so that you can show up as your best self, with presence and power in your own life. In this episode, Kass and Steve talk about the difference between good and bad selfishness. It's not about the act of focusing on yourself OR focusing on others—it’s about finding a way to do both by prioritizing your own needs first.

Connection is a huge part of every relationship and human interaction in your life. We cannot have healthy, authentic, meaningful relationships without connecting on some level. And those connections are a huge part of what makes our lives happy and fulfilling. Whether it's your coworkers, your boss, best friend, partner, spouse, kids, whoever—communication is key to connection. Do you ever find yourself struggling to speak up and voice your opinion? Or maybe you feel that even when you do, you’re misunderstood? Do you ever find yourself communicating ineffectively because you’re too reactive? We as human beings have a deep desire to be loved and understood, to feel heard and seen. It’s impossible to do that if we are unable to communicate effectively in order to connect with those around us. In this episode, Kass and Steve discuss how to connect on a deeper, more authentic level through effective communication.

Ever heard of paralysis by analysis? It’s basically when over analyzing or over thinking a situation causes forward motion or decision making to be “paralyzed.” When you end up not even making a decision because you’re so wrapped up in trying to figure out the best option. Here’s another one for you:  Decidophobia - the fear of making the wrong decision. It makes sense to weigh your options and consider the risks of making a decision one way or another, but sometimes it can really halt your progress in life when it goes on for too long. Sometimes, the heaviness of carrying an unmade decision can outweigh the decision itself. It’s like Steve says, it’s like a little bag you add a stone too every time you think about the decision without making it—over time it gets heavier and heavier. As soon as you make the decision, you can drop that heavy bag.  In this episode, Kass and Steve give 4 tips on how to overcome paralysis by analysis and decidophobia so that you can move forward with your life. After all, action brings clarity.

As we travel through our day to day lives, we all experience a myriad of emotions! Whether you’re happy, sad, content, angry, frustrated, joyful, or whatever it may be—it’s important to pay attention to how you are expressing that. Saying things like “I am mad” or “I am frustrated” comes pretty naturally to most of us, but is that the most effective or healthy way to express or think about your emotions? When we use “I am” statements with negative emotions, we are labeling ourselves as a fleeting emotion, something that we don’t want to be forever. You are not mad, you feel mad, and though that may not seem like a big difference—changing the way you think about and vocalize your emotions can help you take back your power. In this episode, Kass and Steve talk about the difference between “I am” and “I feel” statements, and the power behind the words you use to describe yourself.  After all, we are the creators of our lives. So what you say matters, because it dictates your future.

We all run into a midday slump from time to time and it sucks! You know those days where you start off strong and productive and then you leave for your lunch break and by the time you get back, your drive is gone? It’s like you hit a wall and suddenly you just feel drained and out of focus. It can be super hard to get back in your groove. This is a super quick episode, all about finding a way to recharge and reboot so you don’t get stuck in that midday slump! Are you spending your breaks scrolling through social media, being bombarded by hundreds of other people’s emotions and  energy? Do you let others distract you from actually resting when you’ve got the time? Maybe you’re even unknowingly keeping yourself from utilizing that free time to revitalize your energy. In this episode, Kass and Steve share what works for them and give a few suggestions on how you can keep your energy and productivity up!

Sometimes we get wrapped up in our responsibilities and life seems to drift into a mundane routine. We’ve got work and family responsibilities and all the day to day tasks to keep up on. But life should also be full of excitement and passion!  So what can you do when you feel stuck in this heavy rhythm? It’s time to revitalize and refuel with a passion project! I know you might be thinking, “How could I possibly find the time for another project??” The thing about passion projects is that the return on investment is so much higher than the cost! A passion project can re-introduce a level of excitement and drive into your life that you may not have felt in a long time. It’ll yank you right out of that feeling of being stuck and maybe even bored, and give you something to look forward to each day. Plus, you get to decide how much time and effort you put into it. Passion projects don't have to be a huge, all consuming thing. In this episode, Kass and Steve talk about finding time for personal projects, shifting your mindset to make space for them, and aligning your passion with purpose.

Have you ever gone to a restaurant, a store, or a service provider and had a really sub-par experience?  Maybe you’ve even had one of those experiences that was so bad, you just had to get on Yelp or Google and leave a one star review. On the flip side, have you ever seen a really good movie? The kind that makes you want to share it with everyone, and you can’t stop talking about how good it was with all your friends? We’re constantly reviewing the experiences we pay for, whether we actually write a review or not, but when was the last time you did this in more personal aspects of your life? Do you ever leave a get-together with a friend and wish you’d just stayed home? When you get off work do you feel totally drained and discouraged thinking,“Wow, this is really what I spend 40 hours of my week doing.” In this episode, Kass and Steve talk about writing a review of your own life. Learning to take inventory of and analyze your experiences, relationships, your job, and the activities you participate in is vital to a happy life.  When you learn to analyze that way, you learn to find solutions and you learn to take positive steps forward in your life.

These days, it can kind of feel like everything is a tough topic! Speaking your mind can be a scary thing, especially lately with the world feeling unstable or out of wack with the pandemic, the political climate, and growing division in our communities. We’re living in a world where it feels like speaking your mind will separate you from those that have a different opinion, even if you love them. It doesn’t have to be like this though!  Part of the beauty of this world is the diversity of its people. If everyone was the same, the world would be grey instead of color. There is power in recognizing that your world and the way you view it, is not the only world or the only way… and that’s okay. That’s good even! In this episode, Kass and Steve dive into why it’s important to use your voice, and how we can do that without devaluing the opinions or experiences of others. Let’s seek to understand others the way that we hope they will try to understand us!

Society has conditioned us to believe that we can’t have it all. It’s either this or that, not both. You can have a career OR you can have a family. You can make a lot of money OR you can have a job you love. You can have this OR that, you have to choose. But do we really have to choose? Or can we have this AND that? In this episode, Kass and Steve talk about the limitations that we sometimes place on ourselves and our expectations for life. They talk about breaking out of a “this or that” mentality and living with the mindset that you don’t have to choose between two great things, you can have them both. You can have a happy home life AND a thriving career. You can have a job you love AND make good money. “Your brain always finds solutions to what you are planting the seeds for. It'll always be looking for solutions.” Don’t get stuck in the “it’s not that bad” cycle that leads to settling for less than what you want and deserve. Stop compromising on things that you don't HAVE to compromise on. Stop placing limitations on your happiness and embrace a life where you can have this AND that.

We as humans are flawed! It’s what makes us human, and it’s beautiful! However, it’s pretty natural for us to have insecurities and sensitivities, and there will always be people who capitalize on those things and try to use them against us. Oftentimes we give too much power to those kinds of people (bullies) and we can tend to let the words of others dictate how we feel about ourselves.  Sometimes bullies are strangers on the internet, but sometimes they can even be our friends or family. More often than not, bullies are projecting their own insecurities or flaws onto us and either intentionally, or unintentionally hurt us. So how do we ‘block the haters’ and move forward, loving ourselves with all our imperfections? In this episode, Kass and Steve share some of their personal experiences with bullies and how they’ve learned to handle the negativity in a positive way. They talk about the importance of setting boundaries, communicating in a non-reactive way, learning to laugh at your flaws, and taking the high road when you feel like you’re under attack.