The Dating Orange

In the last episode we looked at the systems that keep the swing scene running. This time we go to the people inside it. What happens to your confidence when strangers desire you — or your partner? How do couples handle jealousy when it inevitably appears? What does it feel like to experience compersion for the first time? And where’s the line between treating swinging as a fun hobby you can pick up and put down, and treating it as something closer to a lifestyle? We hear from people who found unexpected self-worth, couples who hit the jealousy wall and found different ways through it, the unusual friendships that form in rooms where half the people have it all on show, and what the scene can do (for better and for worse) to a long-term relationship. This is the human side of Irish swinging. To hear the next unreleased episode of the series now become a member of HeadStuff+ to access early episodes of Swing State, bonus episodes and ad free listening. Just go to ⁠https://headstuffpodcasts.com/show/the-dating-orange/ Sources: • Young et al. (2023) – ADHD and sexual interests/practices • Walsh-Adams et al. (2026) – Autistic traits and consensual non-monogamy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Once you step through the door, what does the Irish swinging scene actually look like? Episode 2 walks you through the basics: the clear line between quiet socials in public bars and full play parties, how people find events, and the unspoken ranking that decides who gets attention and who struggles. We look at verifications, filters, site supporters, the simple rules organisers stick to so things don’t go balls-up, and what a full weekend away in the Midlands really involves - cabins, communal breakfasts, playrooms and all. Plus the public moments that spill into hotel bars, the different energies of different rooms, and why the better nights stay selective on purpose. This is the systems episode: how the scene tries to keep itself running, and keep people safe. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever thought about how people actually find their way into Ireland’s swinging scene? In the series opener of Swing State, we start at the door. My week-long experiment on Fab Swingers reveals a dramatic gender gap in attention. Origin stories from real-life swingers range from chance kitchen conversations and post-breakup curiosity to couples in long relationships deciding to explore together or trying to fix their marriage. Journalist Aoife Moore defines what swinging actually means in an Irish context, while people already inside share the gap between what they expected (alternative looks, pure porn, key parties) and what they found: ordinary people of all ages, strict-ish rules, and a lot more talking than outsiders in the 'vanilla world' assume. First nights, first nerves, filters, free single women, and the quiet machinery that keeps the scene ticking over. Curiosity, apps, and a delivery of veg. This is how you get in. To hear episode two of the series now become a member of HeadStuff+ to access early episodes of Swing State, bonus episodes and ad free listening. Just go to https://headstuffpodcasts.com/show/the-dating-orange/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Beyond the old myths of keys in a bowl and pampas grass lies a quiet but strong subculture operating right across Ireland. Swing State is a new five-part investigative podcast series that takes an unvarnished look inside the country's swinging and alternative dating scene. The series combines real-life stories, event insider perspectives, and a week-long app experiment that yielded 387 messages in just seven days. Over five episodes, we examine how people first find their way in, what the nights and systems actually look like on the scene, what this does to relationships, where it starts to go wrong, and what remains when someone decides to walk away. Grounded, candid, and non-judgmental, Swing State cuts through the noise to deliver an honest look at Swing culture in Ireland today. Episode one is out Tuesday the 27th of October! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week the orange is joined by Jenny for the first of a two-part bonus series. Jenny shares what life is really like living in rural Ireland in a poly household. Jenny opens up about sleeping arrangements, handling jealousy, and how clear communication keeps their relationship thriving. To hear the full episode and unlock ad-free listening become a member at ⁠⁠https://headstuffpodcasts.com/show/the-dating-orange/⁠⁠ This show is part of HeadStuff Podcasts. Thank you for supporting the pod! 🍊 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week the orange is joined by Jenny for the first of a two-part bonus series. Jenny shares what life is really like living in rural Ireland in a poly household. Jenny opens up about sleeping arrangements, handling jealousy, and how clear communication keeps their relationship thriving. To hear the full episode and unlock ad-free listening become a member at ⁠https://headstuffpodcasts.com/show/the-dating-orange/⁠ This show is part of HeadStuff Podcasts. Thank you for supporting the pod! 🍊 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, the Orange co-hosted by friend of the show Justine Stafford sits down with creative director Hloni Coleman to explore alternative dating and break down how polyamory actually works. Hloni shares his personal experiences with polyamorous relationships, setting boundaries, and managing jealousy. Plus, they react to real listener stories about alternative dating in Ireland and offer advice on navigating hierarchy in relationships. To support the show and access ad-free listening and bi-weekly bonus content become a member at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠headstuffpodcasts.com/membership⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ This show is part of HeadStuff Podcasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to part two of my conversation with Roisin from Daters Gonna Date. This week we discuss the rest of the venues we both visited, vendors, music & entertainment options. To hear the full episode and unlock ad-free listening become a member at https://headstuffpodcasts.com/show/the-dating-orange/ This show is part of HeadStuff Podcasts. Thank you for supporting the pod! 🍊 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, the Orange sits down with Roisin from the Daters Gonna Date podcast to break down the reality of wedding venue hunting across Ireland. From capacity caps and costs to barn setups, and mountain estates, they share the pros and cons of the spots they toured and why some fell flat. A must listen for any bride to be, so tell your friends who are engaged! If you're enjoying this chat part two will be out exclusively for bonus members next Tuesday. 🍊 To support the show and access ad-free listening and bi-weekly bonus content become a member at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠headstuffpodcasts.com/membership⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ This show is part of HeadStuff Podcasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Your friend was in a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship, but five years later they’re still talking about him, looking for contact with him and his family, and searching for closure. When does the need for closure stop being healing and start becoming self-harm? And when do you have to accept that you can’t keep helping someone who isn’t ready to move on? I speak to Justine Stafford about a recent situation with a friend that ultimately led me to end the friendship To hear the full episode and unlock ad-free listening become a member at https://headstuffpodcasts.com/show/the-dating-orange/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices