The Big Lad Podcast

Why do so many men struggle to open up about their emotions? Why are we more connected than ever, yet increasingly isolated? And are we actually getting the right advice when it comes to looking after our mental health?In Episode 141 of The Big Lad Podcast, I'm joined by Finn Plattel and Fliss Downes for a brutally honest conversation about mental health, emotional vulnerability, masculinity, relationships and the pressures of modern society.We explore why men often struggle to communicate how they're feeling, how our upbringing shapes the way we deal with emotions, and why trust and feeling safe are so important when opening up to someone.We also discuss the differences between men's and women's experiences of mental health, why men are significantly more likely to die by suicide, and whether the advice we're giving people is actually helping them.But this conversation goes much deeper than mental health statistics.We talk about the male loneliness epidemic, the importance of male friendships, how social media is changing relationships, the pressure to be independent, and why we're losing the ability to simply enjoy life without constantly chasing the next achievement.In this episode, we discuss:- Why men struggle to open up about their feelings.- How childhood experiences and generational conditioning shape our emotional behaviour.- Why trust and emotional safety are essential for vulnerability.- The differences between men's and women's mental health.- Why men are three times more likely to die by suicide.- Whether traditional therapy is always the right approach for men.- The importance of male friendships, brotherhood and community.- How social media is contributing to loneliness and unrealistic expectations.- Why being independent doesn't mean having to do everything alone.- How to communicate better with your friends and partners.- The importance of finding hobbies, enjoying downtime and reconnecting with your inner child.One of the biggest takeaways from this conversation is that you don't necessarily need to sit someone down and have a deep conversation about your mental health. Sometimes you just need to spend time with your mates, do something you enjoy and remind yourself that you don't have to navigate life alone.A question to leave you with:"What if the life you're desperately trying to build is actually preventing you from enjoying the life you've already got?"Connect with our guests:Finn Plattel: https://instagram.com/finnplattel_Fliss Downes: https://instagram.com/iamflissdownes📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10

How much of your life are you spending waiting for the “right time” to start living?We tell ourselves we'll travel next year, spend more time with family when work calms down, get into shape after the next big project, or finally do the things we've always dreamed of once we have enough money.But what happens when later never comes?In this episode of The Big Lad Podcast, I explore why we keep putting life on hold, how our perception of time shapes our priorities, and why we risk reaching the end of our lives with a list of things we always meant to do.Drawing on Stoic philosopher Seneca and psychologist Laura Carstensen's socioemotional selectivity theory, I discuss the relationship between time, ambition, happiness, regret and the importance of living in the present.I also share a personal example: my lifelong dream of owning a Porsche 911, and the dilemma of whether to keep saving for the future or finally pursue something I've wanted since I was a child.This isn't about spending recklessly, abandoning your ambitions or ignoring your financial future. It's about finding the balance between preparing for tomorrow and actually enjoying today.Because you can spend your entire life preparing to live.You can work hard now to retire later. Save now to enjoy life later. Build your body now so that you'll feel confident later. Keep putting off experiences until the timing is perfect.But time isn't guaranteed. Neither are your health, energy or the opportunities you have today.So, what are you putting off? What conversations are you avoiding? What experiences have you been promising yourself for years?And here's the question I want you to think about:Imagine you're 80 years old and get one hour with the person you are today. What would you tell yourself to stop worrying about, and what would you tell yourself to start doing?That might tell you more about how you should be living than another five years of planning ever will.👇 Join the conversation: What have you been putting off, and what's one thing you want to make happen?If you enjoy honest conversations about self-improvement, personal growth, philosophy, mindset, fitness and living a more intentional life, subscribe to The Big Lad Podcast.CHAPTERS00:00 Your life is shorter than you think00:28 Finding the balance between now and later01:03 A lifelong dream: the Porsche 91102:20 How our perception of time changes our priorities03:09 Stop putting off people and experiences03:47 What will you regret never doing?04:15 Seneca and the time we waste04:37 The paradox of preparing to live05:19 Why your health and energy matter05:59 Dreams, regret and what matters to you06:41 Stop living for “later”06:55 What would your 80-year-old self tell you?07:39 Your turn: share your thoughts#SelfImprovement #PersonalGrowth #Philosophy

Are you tired of the modern world, endless screens, and artificial intelligence taking over everything? In this episode of The Big Lad Podcast, we take an honest look at why life in the 90s, 2000s, and 2010s felt so much simpler compared to today's hyper-connected, AI-driven reality.From deepfakes, misinformation, and online noise to the automation of skilled professions and the fitness industry—is modern technology genuinely making our lives better, or are we losing human connection and real skills along the way?Drop your thoughts in the comments below: Do you miss life before smartphones and AI, or are we just looking back through rose-tinted glasses?📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10#ModernWorld #ArtificialIntelligence #Podcast #Nostalgia #Technology

Who is Michael Smoak, the man behind HigherUpWellness? In this episode of The Big Lad Podcast, I sit down with Michael for an honest conversation about life, personal growth, masculinity, relationships, grief and what it really means to become a better version of yourself.Michael has built an audience around self-improvement, wellness and challenging the way people think. But rather than simply rehashing the advice he's shared elsewhere, we explore the person behind the public image, question some of the ideas we take for granted, and get into the uncomfortable realities of trying to live a better life.We discuss why self-improvement can sometimes become another way of telling yourself you're not good enough, whether suffering really makes us stronger, and the difference between taking responsibility for your life and ignoring the circumstances that shape it.We also explore the impact of losing a parent, how grief changes your perspective, what masculinity and emotional vulnerability really mean, and whether we're genuinely trying to improve ourselves or simply trying to prove something to the world.This is a conversation about questioning your beliefs, confronting your insecurities, understanding yourself and working out what actually matters.If you're interested in personal development, mental health, philosophy, masculinity, emotional resilience or simply having more honest conversations about life, this episode is for you.📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10Chapters00:00 Introduction: Who is Michael Smoak?03:56 Cultural Differences: UK vs. US Attitudes07:17 Fear of Failure and Its Connotations11:22 Misunderstandings About Michael’s Tone and Intent14:36 Dealing with Online Hate and Criticism20:22 The Reality of Public Opinion and Detachment25:24 Living with Purpose Amidst Loss30:04 The Final Message: Empty the Tank34:56 Self-Improvement vs. Self-Actualisation40:21 Embracing Greater Challenges for Growth41:09 The Never-Ending Pursuit of Service and Love42:07 The Love of Walking and Loving the Process43:02 The Never-Ending Search for Enough44:01 The Illusion of Achievements Filling the God-Shaped Hole45:21 Celebrating Achievements Without Losing Joy47:02 Investing in Growth and Learning from Goals49:11 The Power of Creating for Its Own Sake50:34 The Redemptive Power of Art and Authenticity52:26 The Motivation Behind Creating Content53:42 Evolving Beliefs About Relationships55:18 Love, Sacrifice, and Selflessness in Relationships58:10 Polarity and Authenticity in Love01:00:15 The Role of Faith and Sacrificial Love01:02:42 The Fragility of Life and Living Fully01:04:26 Lessons from Personal Tragedy and Purpose01:08:03 The Impact of Hardship on Identity01:12:21 Living Without Regret and Embracing Mortality01:19:24 Reflecting on Life, Achievements, and Faith01:21:26 Final Reflections: Living a Life of Service and Purpose#HigherUpWellness #HigherUpWellnesschallenge #PersonalGrowth #SelfImprovement

Can you actually make a full-time living from writing online, or is the reality far harsher than people admit?In this episode of The Big Lad Podcast, writer and creator David McIlroy joins us to pull back the curtain on what it really takes to turn words into a sustainable income. We dive into the brutal traps aspiring writers fall into, why chasing vanity metrics and viral views won't pay your bills, and how to build genuine audience trust that translates into a viable creative business.If you’re a writer, content creator, or freelancer wondering how to turn your craft into a career, this conversation breaks down the practical realities most people avoid talking about.David's Substack - https://substack.com/@thedavidmcilroyDavid's Instagram - https://instagram.com/thedavidmcilroyDavid's Masterclass - https://david-mcilroy.kit.com/products/substack-growth-sessions📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10Chapters00:00 Introduction: Why Authenticity Matters in Content03:08 Storytelling and Humor as Trust Builders04:36 Managing Content Creation and Avoiding Follower Fatigue05:07 Using AI Tools Like Whisperflow for Content Repurposing06:02 The Importance of Consistency and Long-Term Planning07:28 The Risks of Relying Too Much on AI08:23 Human Error and Authenticity in Content09:11 Deliberate Mistakes and Demonstrating Realness10:21 Inspiration from Childhood and the Love of Writing12:47 Turning Passion into a Business14:23 Key Moments of Success and Growth17:03 Building a Community and Listening to Your Audience19:22 The Reality of Long-Term Content Creation23:58 The Value of Consistent Effort and Repetition26:32 Growing Subscribers and Avoiding Follower Fatigue30:37 Turning Audience into Business and Monetization36:20 The Importance of Saying No and Vetting Clients43:29 The Long-Term Perspective and Patience in Growth50:26 Content Strategy: Quality Over Quantity55:29 Upcoming Projects and Future Plans#Writing #ContentCreation #OnlineBusiness #CreativeCareer #Podcast

We just hit 1,000 subscribers on The Big Lad Podcast! To celebrate, I sat down to answer your most asked questions—covering everything from my 5-year channel roadmap to my core spiritual beliefs, the single best piece of advice I’ve received, and the biggest lesson I’ve learned along the way.Whether you're looking for actionable life advice, personal mindset insights, or a behind-the-scenes look at the future of the podcast, this episode dives deep into the journey so far.📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10Chapters00:00 Introduction and recent podcast milestones01:58 The origin story of the Big Lad Hikes03:54 Growth and challenges of the podcast06:10 The impact of guest appearances and future guests07:58 My approach to content authenticity and growth10:07 Balancing personal life, work, and content creation12:04 Strategies for YouTube growth and promotion13:47 Maintaining motivation and discipline15:58 Podcast editing process and content distribution18:00 Upcoming episodes and in-person guest plans18:52 Personal beliefs and lessons learned21:54 Handling multiple relationships and communication24:07 Goals, control, and future plans26:10 Hiking adventures abroad and lessons from Scotland27:05 Hosting tips and interview insights27:55 Advice for aspiring content creators29:01 The importance of change and taking action29:57 Personal obsessions and winding down routines32:10 Childhood passions and outdoor activities33:52 Closing remarks and future outlook#ContentCreator #PodcastTips #SelfImprovement

Why aren't you where you want to be?Maybe it's your job.Maybe it's your partner.Maybe it's your parents.Maybe it's the economy.Maybe you don't have enough time.Maybe you weren't given the same opportunities as everyone else.And maybe some of those things are genuinely true.But at what point do you stop explaining why your life isn't where you want it to be and start asking what you're actually going to do about it?In Episode 135 of The Big Lad Podcast, I'm talking about accountability, personal responsibility, excuses and the modern tendency to blame external circumstances for the things we're unhappy with in our lives.This isn't about pretending everything that happens to you is your fault.It's about recognising that you don't have to be responsible for creating a problem to be responsible for what you do next.We get into:- Why people blame external factors for their failures- The psychology of the self-serving bias- Internal vs external locus of control- Why making excuses can feel better than taking responsibility- Jocko Willink and the idea of Extreme Ownership- Stoicism and focusing on what you can control- The difference between being a victim and living with a victim mentality- Why a legitimate excuse can still hold you back- How accountability can actually give you your power back- The uncomfortable questions you need to ask yourselfThe most important question isn't:“Whose fault is this?”It's:“What am I going to do about it?”If there's something in your life you're unhappy with, this episode is your reminder to stop looking everywhere else for the answer and have a look in the mirror.The Big Lad Podcast is about becoming a better man physically, mentally and personally — without the bullshit.If this episode hits home, send it to someone who needs to hear it.Subscribe to The Big Lad Podcast for more conversations about self-improvement, discipline, fitness, mindset, relationships, masculinity and becoming the best version of yourself.📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10Chapters00:00 Introduction to personal responsibility and accountability02:08 Understanding the self-serving bias and its impact on accountability04:14 Jaco Willink's extreme ownership and its application06:07 Overcoming excuses and prioritizing actions07:20 Victim mentality versus genuine adversity07:43 The mirror test for self-assessment and taking control#Accountability #PersonalResponsibility #SelfImprovement #Mindset

How much of your life are you actually living for yourself?If you're constantly worrying about what other people think, you might be giving away more of your life than you realise.In this episode of The Big Lad Podcast, I talk about the hidden cost of caring too much about other people's opinions — how the fear of judgement can stop you from taking risks, pursuing your goals, expressing yourself, setting boundaries and ultimately living the life you actually want.We massively overestimate how much other people are thinking about us. This is known as the spotlight effect — and once you understand it, you start to realise that most of the judgement you're worried about exists far more in your own head than it does in everyone else's.We also look at:• Why you shouldn't treat everyone's opinion as equally valuable• The difference between constructive criticism and meaningless judgement• Why people pleasing can leave you living someone else's life• How fear of judgement stops people taking action• Why you can't control what other people think of you• The importance of becoming comfortable with being misunderstood• How to stop seeking constant approval• Why your time is too valuable to spend managing other people's opinionsThe uncomfortable truth is that somebody is going to judge you regardless of what you do.So the question is: are you going to let their opinion determine how you live your life?This is a short solo episode about confidence, self-worth, authenticity, people pleasing, overthinking and learning to care less about what other people think.📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10Chapters00:00 Introduction: The Cost of Caring About Others' Opinions01:47 The Spotlight Effect: Overestimating Others' Attention03:52 Controlling Reactions, Not External Events06:03 The Courage to Be Imperfect and Vulnerable#SelfImprovement #Confidence #PeoplePleasing #mentalstrength

What if getting more sex from your wife had less to do with asking for more sex… and more to do with becoming a better man?David Rainwater is the creator of The Fuckable Husband Project — an experiment where he started filtering his behaviour through one simple question:“What would a more fuckable husband do?”The results went far beyond sex.In this conversation we talk about marriage, attraction, sex, masculinity, fitness, mental load, competence, communication, social media, boredom, self-improvement and why so many couples stop putting effort into their relationship once they're married.David explains why doing the dishes doesn't mean you've “earned” sex, why competence can be attractive, why trying to make marriage 50/50 can create unnecessary conflict, why social media is distorting our expectations of relationships, and why the boring parts of marriage might actually be the most important.We also get into the uncomfortable question:If you're improving yourself because you want your wife to sleep with you more, are you actually improving yourself — or have you created a contract?And ultimately, what does it actually mean to be a “fuckable husband”?If you're married, in a long-term relationship, or simply interested in becoming a better man, there's plenty here to think about.Subscribe to The Big Lad Podcast for more conversations about fitness, self-improvement, relationships and becoming a better version of yourself.#Marriage #Relationships #SelfImprovement📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE10Chapters00:00 Introduction to the Fuckable Husband Project02:02 The core idea: Behaviours filter through the question of attractiveness04:20 How the project is perceived by the wife and its impact07:39 Building habits quickly and using identity as motivation12:10 The importance of honesty and self-awareness in self-improvement16:19 The role of social media and societal influences on relationships20:32 Leveraging strengths and dividing labor in marriage24:04 The long-term benefits of consistent self-improvement28:46 The importance of boredom and monotony in relationship longevity36:39 The distortion of reality by social media and comparison44:49 The value of internal reflection and self-assessment01:02:27 Effective communication and repeated conversations01:09:26 The holistic view of a fulfilling marriage01:13:56 Practical steps for men to improve their relationships01:18:55 Defining what it means to be a 'fuckable husband'

Unlock the secrets to long-term gym success with me as I share the most impactful lessons from his 15 years of fitness experience. Forget the myths and the latest fad diets—discover the real strategies that will help you achieve consistent, lasting results. If you're tired of quick fixes and want to build a sustainable workout routine, this episode is a must-listen!I dive deep into the core principles that can transform your fitness journey. I reveal why more is not always better when it comes to training frequency, and how starting with a manageable routine can set you up for success. You'll learn about the importance of consistency over intensity, and how to overcome the common pitfall of ego lifting that leads to injuries.You'll discover:- The critical role of patience in your fitness journey and why it’s crucial to embrace the boring work that leads to real progress.- Why nobody cares about your gym performance as much as you think they do—helping you let go of gym anxiety and focus on your own journey.- The essential link between diet and exercise—how nutrition underpins every workout and why you can’t out-train a bad diet.- Effective strategies for progressive overload that don’t just involve adding more weight, ensuring you’re building strength safely and sustainably.- The vital importance of recovery, and how to differentiate between mental fatigue and the need for physical rest.Understanding these principles can save you from burnout and injury while maximising your results. This episode is not only packed with transformative insights but also serves as a rallying cry for anyone eager to make a lasting change in their fitness life. Tune in to hear my practical tips and actionable advice that are perfect for beginners and seasoned gym-goers alike. Essential listening if you want to build a workout routine that lasts a lifetime!📲 Join the Big Lad Mailing List for exclusive content & early access: https://mailchi.mp/799f9d66ee7f/the-big-lad-podcastMy Instagram - https://instagram.com/gw_fitThe Big Lad Podcast - https://instagram.com/thebigladpodcastSubstack - https://substack.com/@thebigladpodcastNeutonic - GEORGE100:00 Intro: 15 years of gym lessons1:10 1. More isn’t always better3:19 2. Don’t change your program too often5:36 3. Nobody is judging you at the gym7:18 4. Form over weight—don’t ego lift8:55 5. You can’t out-train a poor diet11:36 6. Food is fuel13:18 7. Progressive overload isn’t just adding weight14:22 8. Recovery matters as much as training16:13 9. Supplements are the finishing touch, not the foundation20:10 10. Don’t compare yourself to others22:59 11. Progress takes longer than you think26:09 Final lesson: don’t quit28:10 Recap: five principles to follow29:44 Closing and call to action