Talkin about Midlife

In this episode, I sit down with artist Leah — a former accountant turned figurative painter known for her portraits of women — to talk about art as a language for the body when words run out.We trace Leah's path from the audit floor to the easel, sparked by an unexpected, almost hormonal pull toward painting during her first pregnancy, and unpack why the hands are one of our most primal, expressive tools — closely tied to speech, gesture and emotion long before we could name what we felt. Leah opens up about painting women as a form of self-discovery, why every portrait carries a bit of darkness, and how the studio became a grounding, almost meditative anchor through early motherhood.We also get into archetypal territory — the "autumn woman," the Maga (sorceress) season of midlife, and what it means to move into the wise-woman, guardian role — plus a fun detour into colour psychology, why green and blue are so relaxing, and Leah's complicated love affair with pink.A conversation about creativity, embodiment, motherhood and the seasons of a woman's life — through the eyes of a painter.Find more of Leah's work at www.leahmariani.com. You can find Leah on Instagram @leahmarianiartspace or Tik Tok @leahmarianiartspace.

What if the most transformative journey you could take wasn't to a faraway place, but back to yourself?In this episode, I sit down with Damianne President, a coach who helps midlife women use intentional solo travel as a catalyst for self-discovery. Damianne has lived and worked across four continents — from St. Lucia and Canada to India, Sudan, Japan, and now Prague — and her extraordinary cross-cultural life is the foundation of her work.What you'll hear in this conversation:How a Sufi teacher in India told a 20-something Damianne she was "watching her life from the window of a train" and how that moment set her on a completely different path,Why travel, especially to unfamiliar countries, is one of the most powerful developmental tools available to us, and how it works on the nervous system in ways our everyday routines simply don't,The crucial difference between escaping yourself through travel and genuinely meeting yourself and what it looks like when people confuse the two,How Damianne supports clients to stay regulated when travel gets uncomfortable, including Tara Brach's RAIN practice and her own beautifully simple "5 more minutes" approach,Why midlife is such a potent moment for this kind of work, identity is formed but something feels quietly off, and the anonymity of a new place offers the freedom to experiment with who you want to be,The integration piece: why the real transformation happens not on the trip, but in the intentional reflection that follows.There's also a rich conversation about belonging and nervous system regulation, the grief that lives inside unmet aspirations, the way our neurobiology pulls us back toward the familiar, and why shared humanity is the thing that consistently surprises people most when they travel deeply.Damianne makes a distinction that stayed with me long after the conversation ended; the difference between searching for yourself and meeting yourself. They're not the same thing.Connect with Damianne:Website & free guide for beginners: freedomlookslikethis.com/goaloneSocial media: @Damiannecoaching

What if the systems that have shaped our world for centuries aren't just political structures but are actually living in your body right now? In this rich conversation, I sit down with my dear friend Sasha Ostara, writer, coach and decolonisation educator, to explore how capitalism, white supremacy, patriarchy, and human supremacy don't just exist "out there"; they show up as chronic tension, hypervigilance, collapsed chests, shame, and the relentless hum of never-enough.Drawing on Sasha's viral blog post and Rupa Marya's book Inflame, we trace how colonisation becomes embodied and what it means to begin the slow, tender work of decolonising from the inside out.In this episode, we explore:The four "legs" of colonialism — human supremacy, white supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism — and the distinct somatic signatures each one leaves in the body,Why decolonisation isn't just a political act, but an embodied one: the ideas that have lived in our nervous systems for generations can't be thought away,How white supremacy lands differently in different bodies, as hypervigilance, fear, shame, and disgust; and why those experiences are more interconnected than we often assume,The somatic cost of patriarchy: the tight throat, the collapsed chest, the learned habit of making ourselves smaller and policing our own voices to stay safe,Why men are often the first and most hidden victims of male supremacy; cut off from their own feeling, craving connection but conditioned to perform disconnection,Capitalism as extraction: how the "never enough" of consumerism mirrors the same extractive logic we apply to our bodies, our time, and our life force,What actually happens in the body when safety begins to return — and why healing often feels heavier before it feels lighter,The invitation to move from a mechanistic relationship with our bodies to an ecological one — drawing on Robin Wall Kimmerer's Braiding Sweetgrass and the concept of the Honourable Harvest.There's also a gorgeous thread on the gifts hidden inside perimenopause, the "hungry ghost" of consumerism, and why — as Sasha puts it — the moment we start seeing these systems clearly, we begin changing the paradigm for everyone around us.Find Sasha at: sasha-ostara.com, on instagram @sasha-ostara, tiktok, and facebook.

Today I talk with Ashely Miley, a sacred intimacy coach, about how we can develop a deeper connection with the our sensuality and sexuality. With our life force energy. Ashley talks about her own journey of connecting with her sexuality after long periods of disconnection from her body and what was helpful for her. We discussed how trauma, particularly for people with a history of sexual trauma, disconnects us from our bodies as a strategy of protection and how we can understand that when we look through the contextual lenses of the nervous system and embodiment.Ashely studied music at University and was an orchestral oboe player. For many years this gave her an avenue for self-expression however it got to a point where the rules and processes of a professional classical music career became too constricting for her and she was not able to express who she was anymore. This lead her to pursue training in sexuality and relationship coaching. We talk about this was a natural avenue into connecting with her life force energy and embodied expression.We also discussed:How sensuality is a fabulous bridge to pleasure and often a great starting point when we are feeling really disconnected from our body,We define sacred intimacy and what is actually means in partnership and for also developing a very deep connection with ourselves,How sacred intimacy can take us from performance to pleasure particularly when we are in long term relationships where we might experience intimacy as something we do rather than something we feel,What foundation conditions need to be in place for couple’s to experience greater intimancy especially when their is a history of trauma within the relationship, How reclaiming our sexuality in midlife can be incredibly healing.You can find Ashely at www.thesacredintimacytemple.com .

One of the most challenging aspects of midlife transition for many women is coming to terms with your own mortality and ageing. The paradigm is indeed different for men, there is more acceptance of the ageing man with grey hair. But for women, aside from menopause, there is great fear in ageing and becoming irrelevant. This largely has been perpetuated by the cosmetics industry and popular culture. How many role models of women ageing on their own terms do we see in the media, social media or television and films?In this podcast, I talk with Faith Agugu, psychotherapist and founder of Silver Sirens, an ageing positive community for women over 50+. We discuss why the traditional narrative around ageing for women is not only limiting but harmful to wisdoms self-esteem and well-being. When you embrace your second half of life with curiousity and confidence you are setting yourself up to live well.In the podcast we discuss:How the narrative we were told about ageing as a child greatly influences how we approach our own ageing process,How popular culture and media impacts how we feel about our bodies and mental health as we age,How fear drives increased stress in our lives in this transition and what is misunderstood about getting older,How there is a different paradigm of ageing for women than there is for men,How many women describe midlife as a time when old identities fall away—roles, ways of being, expectations. What we see as therapists of this transition emerge when women are supported through that transition well?The common myths Faith would love to dispel about ageing,How intergenerational wisdom around ageing can be passed down through family systems,What Faith believes is the most compassionate first step you can take as you approach both midlife or elderhood.You can find Faith through her therapy practice The Healing Process or her community group Silver Sirens or on instagram or Facebook..

A quick little podcast with just me today. I have been reflecting on how some people struggle through growth and healing, more in terms of being lost in the liminal space. In the darkness we might say. I did write a blog about the anatomy of life transitions where I talked about it a few months ago but I think with a podcast you can sometimes say a little bit more.Recently, I had an experience where something of mine came up again and I was thinking wow I have al the resources, training and skills to know what is going on. What I noticed is that the impact of it was significantly less than in the past. Minimal really. It was more a noticing and then I was able to resource myself.So often, when people begin trauma healing or embark on a personal growth journey, they imagine it will be a straight line: one step after another, always moving forward, never looking back. But real healing and growth rarely follow that kind of neat, linear path. Instead, they are more like a spiral or a tide, flowing in cycles, circling back, rising and falling.Healing also has the rhythm of the tide. There are moments of expansion, clarity, and energy—like the incoming tide that fills and nourishes. And there are moments of retreat, rest, and stillness—like the tide going out, leaving space for reflection and integration. Neither state is better or worse; both are necessary.When we expect healing to be linear, we can feel shame or discouragement when old triggers resurface or when we find ourselves “back where we started. Recognising this cyclical rhythm allows us to meet ourselves with more compassion.

Caroline Shabaz is a colleague, mentor and friend who I am so happy to talk to today. She is a meta psychotherapist, who is deeply experienced and who has trained in many different therapeutic modalities. She is a Clinical Psychologist, has a masters degree in Depth Psychology, is trained in Family Constellations work, is a certified in providing psilocybin assisted therapy and has trained in many wisdom traditions and modalities. Caroline is also a member of the kink community and she trains other therapists how to work with Kink and BDSM.We talk about how relationships are crucibles for our transformation and growth throughout our lifetime. They trigger our core wounds so that we may heal and burn away who we think we are. We learn how to be in relationships through our family system and internalise much of this from our parents and caregivers, but we are born into a cultural narrative or story that shaped you and often our growth is about reclaiming part of that or alternatively it may be about letting go what we no longer need.You will also hear:Understanding the midlife narrative through the Jungian Lens. We also apply an astrological frame to it (Neptune square Neptune),How our hormones and the changing hormonal cocktail we have facilitates changes through our lifetime,Understanding the deeper architecture that drives the general level of disatisfaction in midlife many of us experience,The Hero and Heroines Journey and how they are an archetypal framework for the many initiations we face in our lifetime,The concept of the Shadow and how it plays out in our relational life,The different alchemical stages of relationship transformation.Caroline runs a program called Transforming Relationships that is for couples and individuals who want to explore themselves deeply in a group container.You can find Caroline at Transformingrelationships.com.au or metapsychotherapy.com

Many people have heard of Flight, Fight and Freeze when it comes to our autonomic nervous system’s defence responses but not all of us have heard of Fawn. Fawning is a pretty sophisticated response that shows up as people pleasing or appeasement. Some practitioners also call it hypersocialisation. We fawn to stay in connection with others, to stay safe. The tricky thing about Fawning is that it can sometimes look like it is a personality trait which I guess we could say is true for many responses driven by Trauma.Today I talk with Rae Halder who is a somatic trauma resolution practitioner about the Fawning response. Rae is a fantastic person to talk about this and she works with many clients with strong Fawn responses.We also get into talking about sexual fawning and how that shows up in our intimate relationships. When we say yes to intimacy because our brain says yes but our body is a big No to it. What happens when we do this repeatedly and how does it get in the way of authentic connection with our partners and lovers.You will hear us talk about many different aspects of trauma healing when it comes to the Fawn response, how it shows up in our body when it gets sick of us doing it repeatedly, why we do it, what is underneath it all and how can we connect with our erotic imprints.If you would like to take the Erotic Blueprints quiz we talk about in the podcast here is the link.You can find Rae on her website www.raehalder.com, on instagram @rachel.rae.halder or on her FB page

Today I am talking to Moira Cormack, my multi talented colleague and friend about Human Design. I have to tell you this podcast was a lot of fun because Moira is fun. Moira is a coach, parenting expert, human design expert and all round super human being. This is Moira’s third time on my podcast, if you didn’t catch the last two on inner child and creativity you should check them out also.Moira doesn’t so much go into the different human design profile, rather she gives us the bigger context of why we would use Human Design. How does it help us be more human, how does it help us connect with our deeper self.We talked about:Why we would use Human Design and how, at this point in time, Human Design is helpful to people to further their personal growth and development,How life is made up of many decisions and choices we make each day and how human design helps us, through understanding our profile, how to better make decisions to align with our energy system in our body,How many of us end up in careers, influenced by our family systems, not doing what we really love.How energy systems in different types work and why not listening to our body leads to health issues,How when we move outside our design, we often experience a discordant note or emotion and this is a sign we are not listening to our body.You can find Moira on Gates of the Moon FB Group, on instagram she is @moira_coach and she has a substack she writes on.

In this episode, I talk with Daniella Matutes who is a somatic coach, breathwork teacher, a very talented human really, who has a not for profit focused on healing gender based violence against women in two generations. We discuss her own journey of healing from abuse and how a body based approach to healing trauma has helped her to process the trauma in her body.Daniella has created an approach called Pleasure Alchemy that offers a road map to individuals with trauma that helps them to understand the healing journey by orienting and resourcing to pleasure and building capacity in the nervous system to feel more. More sensations, emotions, feelings.In this podcast you will hear:Daniella describe her own experience of healing trauma and the different ways she experienced healing,How trauma is passed down generationally through our attachment system and within the physiology of the body,Different survival strategies and how they show up in our body,How the culture we grow up in is internalised and significantly impacts how we show up in the world,Leadership culture in large organisations and how individuals trauma plays out on a daily basis,Our inner ecology and how it influences what we see in the outer world.You will find Daniella at www.somaticself.love, on Instagram, Facebook and Substack.