Forbidden Cinema

Ok, we will be the first to admit that this has been a little delayed.  This last year has been our year personally, but we have fallen a little behind in this artistic side project. If you can read this, you are loved. In this episode we answer the questions that nobody thought to ask about our coverage of Beetlejuice.  As usual, Zack delves deep into what was going on in pop culture at the time and deep dives local newspapers and men's magazines.

Join us as we continue through our coverage of movies that were forbidden (or in this case, maybe should have been) that have had recent upgrades, remakes, or sequels. Ok, we have made some recommendations in the past, but this is top 3 one of the best movies we have covered.  If you haven't seen it in 35 years (like both of us), go out and immediately watch it.  We will wait for you.  Then join us as we go full nostalgia and revel in this masterpiece.

Welcome back as we answer the questions that nobody bothered to ask about our our episode covering the 1984 classic buddy cop action comedy, Beverly Hills Cop. Zack tries to figure out who Eddie Murphy was and how big of a star he was in 1984 (spoiler alert:  HUGE).  We dig into the numbers and discuss how this is one of the most successful movies ever made.  We also look at the very limited number of roles for women in this film. We talk about how Mythbusters ripped this movie a new tailpipe and go over the reviews of the time. Zack digs into newspapers and men's magazines from December of 1984 to discover a Christmas shrimp sale at the Holiday Motel, the Supreme Court hearing a case about the morning moment of silence at schools, a nude pictorial of Suzanne Somers, an article by Steve Martin, Alec Guinness as the spokes model for a tuxedo designer, a 4 color graphing typewriter, a 2-inch flat-screen TV, and pictorials of Lee Major's wife and daughter.

We are all hearing the theme in our head, right?   We watched Beverly Hills Cop from 1984 and had a blast doing it.  Thanks for bearing with us during our unplanned hiatus.  Life has really caught up with us.  We are going to try to get back to a regular release schedule.  Stay tuned.

Welcome back as we tackle the questions nobody bothered to ask about our episode on Young Guns starring Emilio Estevez and everyone else who was hot in 1988. Zack gives us a brief history lesson about the Lincoln County War and how this film is surprisingly probably the most accurate representation ever put on film.  We go in detail about which of the Young "Buns" actors has showed his buns the most on screen and can't even believe the number that Charlie Sheen puts on the scoreboard.  Side note, one of the actresses in an early sex scene with LDP is someone Zack knows very well from Battlestar Galactica / Jenny from Pretty in Pink (and is apparently the daughter of the bad guy from Ernest Goes to Camp, small world). We play a brief game to see if Jenny can name a single current celebrity that is the age of the Young Guns cast.  Zack hits up more numbers than you would ever care to know about the box office and release schedule.   In print, we see the issue of Hustler magazine that started The People vs Larry Flynt was on the news stands when this movie was released.  In Playboy we are introduced to Cooper Hefner, who seems to be much less of a creep than his father.  Zack also realizes that he was lied to when he was told he was in the Guinness record holding conga line.  Jerry Seinfeld makes a very poor prediction about his future. In the Washington PA Observer Reporter we cover a few current events, but much more riveting was the Friday Night TV schedule and an article about the ladies boxing competition at the local fair getting much more spicy than the children in the audience were prepared for.

We are back and this time with a proper movie.  We watched Young Guns from 1988.  There were 80's heartthrobs all over the place in what bizarrely seems to be maybe the most historically accurate film depicting the Lincoln County War.  That's right, this is a biopic about Billy the Kid.   Spoiler alert, it is kind of serious and Bon Jovi is nowhere to be seen.  We think all of our preconceived notions about this film were from Young Guns 2.   Come along with us as we see a Fagan-like General Zod teach a wayward band of misfits about how to be cultured only to be gunned down in the streets by a business rival.  We get to see all of the shootin and cussin and jokes about bodily functions you would want in a film like this.  We have one of the wildest drug scenes in the history of film.  We get a little buns shot for the ladies from Coach Bombay that sadly does nothing for Jenny.  We get a less DILFy Dermot Mulrooney who nobody knew yet, so he has to just be gross.  Did we mention Lou Diamond Phillips and Howard Hughes are in this? Watch this movie and then come along for the ride on something that was even more forbidden than we realized.

One last time into the fray! We have done it.  We are now surely the internet's best and most complete resource for the first 2 seasons of 90's cable erotica Red Shoe Diaries. David Duchovny and Stella are back to read another letter from a Parisienne ad executive and her old flame / impossible to work with auteur commercial director.  We have (surprise) red shoes in an episode for the first time in forever.  There are random elevator shots, no crazy bedroom sets, stair sex, and a very low abdomen shot of our lead actor for the ladies. Come along for one last ride before we get back into movies.  Come for the uneven amount of time our lead actress's right nipple has compared to the left, but stay for the stubbled Jordan Padalecki lookalike lead actor tipping over chairs and screaming "Touch Me!"

Join us as we continue what has to be the most exhaustive deep dive of the nineties erotica for women cable show Red Shoe Diaries.  We are winding down this season hopefully to get back to some movies just like David Duchovny.   In Alphabet Girl we have a young model in a not terribly torrid affair with her famous photographer.  There is not really a love triangle with his young assistant.  Mostly everybody gives each other the space and time they need to grow, except for that one time where the photographer breaks into the assistant's house and they wrestle on top of a huge painting. We finally get an episode that is basically what Zack was staying up late to watch all those years ago.  We have really beautiful sweaty naked people in well lit scenes having sex for an extended period of time.  At this point though, we are missing a little bit of the wackadoo.  That being said, there is a race on a bedroom catwalk between someone on roller blades and a bicycle, so there is that.

Damn Gina... This episode is wild... I mean the last episode was wild, but this one was almost incomprehensible.  Off to Paris at the houseboat next to the Highlander we get an American woman who (hopefully doesn't murder) and assumes the identity of her Parisienne benefactor.  It's the Talented Mr. Ripley meets a Harlequin romance novel. This was probably the worst episode yet from a technical perspective, but we are here with you to work through the trauma of this atrocity.  We are only 2 weeks away from getting back to actual movies. God save us all.

Stop what you are doing, fire up Tubi, and watch this episode. I know we usually talk about stuff from our childhood that our parents would not let us watch, but this is something special.  This episode completely breaks the mold of the moody/broody/dreamy 90s erotica for women anthology series and goes bat crap insane. This is 30 minutes of your life that you will be happy to have spent with us. I can't imagine many people have watched this in the last 30 years, and they are missing out. We have multiple guns, people barking like dogs, oversized sweater dresses, a trunk full of zoot suits, shotgun weddings, scaffolding over beds, camcorder honeymoon sex tapes, threesomes, sex across 2 rows of seating in a 60s convertible, and sex scenes lit so that every single body hair on both sexes is in the spotlight.  Come along and watch this glorious calamity with us.  This is the lowest rated episode of the series so far.  Jenny is confused.  Zack is begging for more.