We Read All the Queer Books

~Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao~ Have you ever wished the queer book you were reading had 500% more murder? Friends, let us introduce you to Iron Widow, a sci-fi epic inspired by Chinese history and folklore. It stars Wu Zetian, a young woman who’s favorite hobby is crushing the patriarchy with giant robots whilst laughing maniacally. Iron Widow also has two of our favorite male characters of all time and a beautiful love triangle (but like, the good gay kind, we promise). We loooove Iron Widow; it also breaks our usual ‘no gratuitous violence’ rule. Here are the trigger warnings from the front of the book: violence and abuse, suicide ideation, discussion and references to sexual assault (though no on-page depictions), alcohol addition, and torture. We do touch on all of these topics in our full review, though the spoiler-free review only has discussion of suicide ideation. For the spoiler-free review, stop around at 8:00 or when the drums kick in. Got book recommendations? Email us at [email protected]!

~Six of Crows & Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo~ Meet Kaz Brekker, aka the leader of the Dregs gang, aka Dirtyhands, aka the Bastard of the Barrel, aka our favorite murderer. Oh, you’ve met Kaz? Well then he’s already stolen your wallet, your watch, and every one of your secrets. On the bright side, now there’s nothing to distract you from watching him and his crew pull off a series of increasingly impossible heists. These books are a masterclass in pacing and character development. They include 3 big heists, about 1000 mini heists, 6 fully fleshed out characters who each get their own healing journey, and multiple romances. ALL IN TWO BOOKS. We seriously can’t recommend these enough. For the spoiler-free review, stop around at 10:50 or when the drums kick in. Got book recommendations? Want Baz to answer all your questions in life? Email us at [email protected]!

~The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi by Shannon Chakraborty~ Come sail the high seas with Amina al-Sirafi, a legendary pirate captain who has come out of retirement for one final job! This is a story (within a story) of found family reuniting and creating safe and joyful spaces. It’s also an immensely fun, fast-paced adventure. It’s ALSO a history lesson about the Middle East and southwest Asia during the Middle Ages. For the spoiler-free review, stop listening at 13:15 or when the drums kick in. Got book recommendations? Email us at [email protected]!

~Nona the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir~ BEWARE - THERE BE SPOILERS HERE!! There is no spoiler-free review in this episode. Although we primarily talk about Nona the Ninth, there are also spoilers for Gideon and Harrow the Ninth. For a spoiler-free introduction to this series, check out our episode on Gideon the Ninth. In this episode, we nominate Baz for god 2024, a character as the bitch of our hearts, and this series as our #1 obsession. Got book recommendations/strong opinions about Griddlehark? Email us at [email protected]!

~Harrow the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir~ BEWARE - THERE BE SPOILERS HERE!! There is no spoiler-free review in this episode. Although we primarily talk about Harrow the Ninth, there are also spoilers for Gideon and Nona the Ninth. For a spoiler-free introduction to this series, check out our episode on Gideon the Ninth. In this episode, we pitch a necromantic reality show and confirm that we understood about 70% of what happened in this book but love it anyway. Got book recommendations/strong opinions about Griddlehark? Email us at [email protected]!

~Victories Greater Than Death by Charlie Jane Anders~ Space — the queerest frontier. These are the voyages of Tina, an teenaged alien raised on earth, and her chosen family. Their continuing mission: to defeat evil-doers, to save the universe & find their place in it, to learn alien pronouns, to explore teen feels, to give consensual hugs, to embrace some YA tropes while subverting others. To boldly go where no gay has gone before.

~The Scholomance Trilogy by Naomi Novik~ In this episode, we cover the Scholomance trilogy — A Deadly Education, The Last Graduate, & The Golden Enclaves. We had a lot to say, so we split this episode in two. Welcome to part two of our queer disaster podcast! For the spoiler-free review, listen to part one. In the world of the scholomance, wizard teens have a slim chance of survival. So for their own safety, they are locked away in a magical high school/prison. Inside of this school/prison is our heroine El, who is destined to become the dark goddess of her world. El is pissed off about this. El is pissed off about pretty much everything, hence why we love her so much. The Scholomance trilogy is a new take on an old trope. It has perfect pacing. It has amazing twists. It has a queer, powerful, angry heroine. It has strong female friendships. It has stealthy anti-capitalist messaging. We love everything about this series and award it 5/5 fingerguns on our gay rating system™.

~The Scholomance Trilogy by Naomi Novik~ In this episode, we cover the Scholomance trilogy — A Deadly Education, The Last Graduate, & The Golden Enclaves. We had a lot to say, so we split this episode in two. Welcome to part one of our queer disaster podcast! In the world of the scholomance, wizard teens have a slim chance of survival. So for their own safety, they are locked away in a magical high school/prison. Inside of this school/prison is our heroine El, who is destined to become the dark goddess of her world. El is pissed off about this. El is pissed off about pretty much everything, hence why we love her so much. The Scholomance trilogy is a new take on an old trope. It has perfect pacing. It has amazing twists. It has a queer, powerful, angry heroine. It has strong female friendships. It has stealthy anti-capitalist messaging. We love everything about this series and award it 5/5 fingerguns on our gay rating system™. For a spoiler-free review, stop listening at around 6:50 or when the drums kick in.

~Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree~ Legends & Lattes follows Viv, an orc mercenary who lays down her sword to open up a coffee shop. It is theoretically a cozy sapphic romance. A lot of people love this book - our feelings were… complicated. Liz felt neutral to affectionate. Baz wanted to burn everything. Content warning for stalking behavior. For a spoiler-free review, stop listening at about 7:35 or when you hear the drums.

~Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston~ Welcome to the lightest timeline, where a badass woman won the 2016 presidential election and her son falls in love with a prince of England. This book is both fluffy and deep. The characters are so real that we feel like they’re our friends. Don’t @ us and try to prove they’re just fictional characters, we refuse to listen. For a spoiler-free review, stop listening around 9:15 or when you hear the drums.