The Late Night Lounge Episode 3

"I'll take three times more security for six times less liberty" and other sordid tales feature in tonight's drawing room patter between our resident P.I.M.Ps.

Ever given up something valuable for a greater good? Give it all up, and then some more, for your favourite emcees Aaron and Mike, laying down an offering worthy of the gods here.

Imagine life is a choose-your-own-adventure where your avatar has to select one superpower. What are the pros and cons and which power would our two chin-strokers select? Decant yourself a fine brandy and recline in your chaise longue to find out.

Cower ye not, because Aaron and Mike are investigating the sources and consequences of that renowned dread that seeps into your marrow in unguarded moments. Whether it's darkness, phantoms or sock puppets that make you tremble, you can be sure it will be touched upon in an appropriate manner.

In a new bonus format to celebrate 100 shows on Spotify, Aaron and Mike will relax in a proverbial drawing room, dressed like pimps and quaffing brandy and smoking Cuban cigars while tripping over peacocks. Their mission? To take a more mature look at things in a much truncated format: that is fifteen minutes. Expect philosophy, sociology, existentialism and maybe some pop culture. The general theme of tonight's edition is the prospect of limited time travel of the soul and its ramifications. Let us know what you think and maybe the lounge will be a regular feature.

We know you prefer when Late Night Large goes low and goes vulgar, so here it is: a discussion on bizarre sexual fetishes submitted for your approval. Largey Smalls makes an appearance in his best smoking jacket to give a thumbs up or down to the most bizarre, shocking and rancid catalysts for sexual gratification known to us not-so-great apes.

Whether you need a holiday, to see extended family or flee from the authorities, most of us will need to engage with aeroplanes at some point. We've all led the cops a merry dance to the airport before barrelling our burning stolen vehicle into a departing passenger jet to watch it explode in GTA, but in real life such horseplay is frowned upon. Airport decorum, leg room and lost luggage are among the topics called aside to be cavity searched in this thrilling episode of everyone's favourite podcast.

You only need to see software that you used to just purchase but now need to pay a subscription for to understand what platform decay is about. We might easily apply it to social media platforms, but does it apply more widely to other areas of our cultural and economic life? Mike and Aaron tussle with this contentious term in order to figure out what the hell went wrong and if there's anything we could do to reverse this alarming trend that's pissing all of us off at a rate of knots.

In movies, a preponderance of exposition ruins our enjoyment. But, in real life, many would give their right arm to know just what the hell is going on, and, more importantly, what is going to happen going forward. Oracles, seers, mystics, clairvoyants, shamen, soothsayers, psychics, and fortune tellers alike have claimed to foresee the future through the ages. Do they have the gift of second sight, or are they just elaborate charlatans? Our own two experienced charlatans debate fate in this thrilling episode.

Well honk our horns and cover us in custard; the time for clowning is now. Being a buffoon is serious business you know. Our two hosts go on to realise that they are too sadly too amateurish to be true buffoons and can only peak at the rank of fool.