How to Trust Yourself with Anna Holtzman

Hello, dear listener.I'm popping in today with a little update about the podcast.I've decided to take a hiatus from the podcast for the rest of the year to rest, reset, and make some space for what's next.One of the things I talk about so often on this show is the importance of listening to ourselves, honoring our needs, and giving ourselves permission to do things differently, even when we're used to just keeping going. And as you might imagine, these are things I'm continually practicing in my own life, too.Over the past several months, I've been feeling a new direction emerging in my work, and with it, a new evolution of this podcast. I'm really excited about where things are heading, and I want to give myself some breathing room to let that next chapter take shape rather than rushing into it.So I'm going to take a little time away from recording and publishing new episodes, and I'll be back in the new year with fresh conversations and some new things I'm excited to share with you.In the meantime, there are more than 140 episodes in the archives, so if you're craving a little company or inspiration, I hope you'll revisit some of those conversations.And I just want to say thank you. Whether you've been listening for years or you've only recently found your way here, I'm so grateful that you're part of this little community.I hope the rest of your year brings you some opportunities to slow down, reconnect with yourself, and make space for whatever is next in your own life.Until we meet again, take good care of yourself. And you can always find me at...www.annaholtzman.comwww.instagram.com/anna_holtzmanhttps://substack.com/@annaholtzmanwww.linkedin.com/in/anna-holtzman

What happens when the life you’ve built no longer feels like the only life available to you?In this episode, Anna sits down with bestselling author, award-winning podcast host, publisher, bookstore owner, entrepreneur, and mom of four Zibby Owens to talk about reinvention, identity, creativity, and what it means to begin again before you have the whole plan figured out.Zibby’s new memoir-in-essays, Between Chapters: How I Started Over, Took Some Chances, and Found the Plot, traces a decade of enormous personal and professional change, including divorce, remarriage, motherhood, friendship, loss, and the creation of a whole new career in the literary world. Press releaseIn their conversation, Anna and Zibby talk about why meaningful change often begins with something very small, how to follow curiosity without needing certainty, and why loving what you’re doing can matter more than having a perfect strategy.They also explore what happens when a woman who is used to putting everyone else first finally gives her own needs a seat at the table. Zibby shares candidly about judgment, people-pleasing, big feelings, writing as a way of processing experience, and learning to tolerate the discomfort that can come with becoming more fully yourself.At the heart of the conversation is a simple but powerful message: it’s never too late. You don’t have to overhaul your entire life today. You just have to take one small step in the direction of what is calling you. That message is also central to Between Chapters, which Zibby hopes will help other women feel less alone and remember that reinvention may still be ahead of them. Press releaseIn this episode, Anna and Zibby discuss:• Why you don’t need to know the whole plan before you begin• Starting small when change feels overwhelming• The difference between fear that signals danger and fear that may actually be excitement• What happens when other people are uncomfortable with your growth• Giving your own needs “a seat at the table”• People-pleasing, judgment, and the fear of disappointing others• Why passion can come before strategy• Writing as a way to process pain, change, and identity• Reinvention in midlife• The importance of letting yourself be in the messy middle• Why it’s never too late to begin againConnect with Zibby OwensWebsite: www.zibbyowens.comInstagram: @zibbyowensPodcast: Totally Booked with ZibbyBook: Between Chapters: How I Started Over, Took Some Chances, and Found the PlotConnect with Annawww.annaholtzman.comhttps://substack.com/@annaholtzmanhttps://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzman/[email protected]

What happens when a role, relationship, career, or version of yourself that once defined you no longer fits — but you don’t yet know what comes next?In this episode, Anna sits down with Functional Medicine Nutritionist, writer, educator, and entrepreneur Andrea Nakayama for a deeply personal conversation about transition, identity, endings, and the uncertain space between who we were and who we’re becoming.Andrea’s own life has included profound transitions. After losing her husband to brain cancer while raising their young son, she left a career in book publishing and entered the world of functional nutrition. She later founded the Functional Nutrition Alliance, growing it into a global health education company that trained thousands of practitioners before selling the business and, years later, ultimately leaving the company she had created.That experience brought Andrea face-to-face with a question many of us encounter in different forms throughout our lives: Who am I without the role that has defined me?Anna and Andrea explore why transitions can feel so destabilizing, why our culture offers so few rituals for endings, and why the in-between period isn’t necessarily something to rush through. Andrea shares the idea of “provisional states” — the seasons when we’re trying on possible versions of what comes next — and how learning to honor that experimentation can bring more compassion to ourselves and others.They also talk about motherhood, aging, menopause, discernment, narrative medicine, and what happens when we loosen our grip on the life we thought we were supposed to have and become curious about what might be emerging.In this episode:• Why identity can become so intertwined with our work and roles• The three choices Andrea saw when she realized something no longer fit: fight, swallow, or leave• Why endings deserve ritual and acknowledgment• What “provisional states” can teach us about uncertainty• The difference between looking for a new identity and learning to tolerate not knowing• Why transition can feel especially intense in midlife• How aging changes our relationship with striving, fixing, and acceptance• The role of writing and narrative medicine in making sense of our lives• Why pausing can help us hear our own voice amid everyone else’s messages• The difference between grasping for what was and opening to what might be• Andrea’s experience of letting go as her son moved across the world• Why discernment has become central to Andrea’s current work• How remembering what other women have survived can help us trust our own capacity to move through changeConnect with AndreaWebsite: https://www.andreanakayama.comSubstack: https://andreanakayama.substack.comInstagram: @andreanakayamaConnect with AnnaWebsite: https://www.annaholtzmantherapy.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzmanLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/annaholtzman/

What if the biggest obstacles in your financial life aren’t really about numbers?In this episode of How to Trust Yourself, Anna talks with trauma-informed financial wellness coach Katy Chen Mazzara about the emotional stories, childhood experiences, and nervous-system patterns that shape our relationships with money.Before becoming a coach, Katy spent more than 15 years as a freelance television producer and development executive, experiencing firsthand the feast-or-famine cycle that is so common in creative careers. Her own desire to understand how to create financial stability eventually led her to study financial planning at UC Berkeley and become certified in trauma-informed somatic coaching.Today, Katy brings those worlds together, helping creatives, freelancers, and entrepreneurs understand both the practical and emotional sides of money.Anna and Katy explore why simply knowing what we “should” do financially often isn’t enough to change our behavior. They talk about the money beliefs we absorb in childhood, the cultural mythology of the “starving artist,” and why shame, fear, and self-punishment can actually make financial change harder.They also explore what it means to feel safe enough to receive more, advocate for yourself, raise your rates, invest, or pursue opportunities—and why releasing attachment doesn’t mean releasing responsibility or effort.In this episode, Anna and Katy discuss:• How childhood experiences shape our unconscious beliefs about money• Why financial problems aren’t always solved by spreadsheets or better information• The “starving artist” story and the ways it can keep creatives small• The connection between self-worth, advocacy, and earning• Why shame and self-punishment can perpetuate financial struggles• How trauma-informed and somatic work can help shift entrenched money patterns• The difference between releasing attachment and giving up effort• Why play, ease, and nervous-system safety can sometimes help us move forward• Money as part of an interpersonal and energetic exchange• How greater emotional freedom can ripple into work, relationships, creativity, and finances• Why it’s never too late to create a different relationship with moneyKaty’s work offers a compassionate alternative to the idea that financial change requires being harder on ourselves. Instead, she invites us to become curious about where our beliefs came from, create enough safety to examine them, and begin making more conscious choices about what we want to carry forward.Connect with Katy Chen MazzaraFree Mindful Money Mastery Guide: https://www.subscribepage.com/mindfulmoneymasteryWebsite: https://www.katychenmazzara.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katychenmazzara/Connect with Anna HoltzmanWebsite: www.annaholtzman.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzman/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anna-holtzman/

What happens when the signals coming from your body feel real, urgent, and convincing — but may not be telling you what you think they are?In this episode, I welcome Dr. Howard Schubiner back to How to Trust Yourself for a conversation about chronic pain, neuroplastic symptoms, emotional expression, self-trust, and the complicated process of learning how to interpret what our bodies are telling us.Howard is an internist, Clinical Professor at Michigan State University College of Human Medicine, and a leading voice in the field of mind-body medicine. His work played an important role in my own recovery from chronic migraine, and it has deeply influenced the way I think about the relationship between emotions, the nervous system, and physical symptoms.Howard joins me to talk about his new book, Unlearn Your Pain: The Science of Recovering from Chronic Pain, Fatigue, Anxiety and Depression, and about how his understanding of chronic symptoms has evolved over more than two decades of working in this field.We explore what it means to say that pain and other symptoms can be generated by the brain — without suggesting that they are imaginary or “all in your head” — and why understanding neuroplasticity can open up new possibilities for recovery.But our conversation also goes beyond chronic pain. We talk about the connection between symptoms and authenticity, what can happen when you’ve spent years suppressing anger or avoiding conflict, and why beginning to express yourself more honestly can sometimes initially feel worse rather than better.We also explore one of the central questions of this podcast: How do you trust yourself when your own brain can sometimes misinterpret danger?In this conversation, we talk about:• What neuroplastic or brain-generated symptoms actually are• Why emotional pain can sometimes show up as physical pain• How the brain learns and reinforces patterns of pain, fear, anxiety, and other symptoms• Howard’s evolving understanding of predictive processing and how the brain creates our experience• The role of Emotion Awareness and Expression Therapy (EAET)• Why suppressing your authentic self can contribute to physical and emotional symptoms• The difference between privately processing anger and publicly expressing it• Why asserting yourself may initially trigger guilt, fear, or even physical symptoms• How people-pleasing and conflict avoidance can become deeply ingrained nervous-system patterns• Why repetition and practice can help the brain learn that new ways of responding are safe• Howard’s own experience with symptoms and health anxiety while launching his new book• How to distinguish between a symptom that needs medical evaluation and one that may be neuroplastic• The risks of both over-focusing and under-focusing on bodily sensations• Why “trust your body” isn’t always as simple as it sounds• How to cultivate discernment rather than blind trust• Why getting conflicting opinions can sometimes help you realize there may not be one objectively “right” answer• The importance of becoming your own advocate• How trusted relationships and co-regulation can support self-trust• Why certainty, belief, and flexibility all matter when navigating uncertainty• The role authenticity can play in healing• Why humor, connection, and community are such important parts of this workConnect with Dr. Howard SchubinerWebsite: https://www.unlearnyourpain.com/Book: Unlearn Your Pain: The Science of Recovering from Chronic Pain, Fatigue, Anxiety and DepressionAssociation for the Treatment of Neuroplastic Symptoms: https://www.symptomatic.me/TMS Wiki: https://www.tmswiki.org/Connect with Anna HoltzmanWebsite: https://www.annaholtzman.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzman/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anna-holtzman/

What if the very patterns that helped you become successful are also the patterns limiting how much success, joy, ease, and visibility you can actually hold?In this episode, Anna talks with Chartered Psychologist Farya Barlas about what Farya calls trauma-led success — the ways that perfectionism, hyper-independence, overworking, people-pleasing, and other survival adaptations can become highly effective strategies for achievement.These patterns aren’t inherently bad. In fact, they may be part of what helped you build the life or career you have today. But at a certain point, the same strategies that once protected and propelled you can begin to create a ceiling.Farya shares how she helps high-achieving women move from success fueled by survival into what she calls reparative success: building from desire, capacity, creativity, choice, and a deeper sense of self-trust.Anna and Farya also explore why healing doesn’t have to mean losing your edge, why discomfort isn’t always a sign that something is wrong, and how nervous-system work can support expansion rather than simply helping us stay comfortable inside familiar patterns.They discuss money, ambition, visibility, identity, inherited beliefs about success, and the subtle signals that can tell us we’re ready for something more — even when, from the outside, everything appears to be going well.In this episode, we explore:• What “trauma-led success” looks like in high achievers• Why survival strategies are often rewarded professionally• The fear that healing will make us less ambitious or successful• The difference between trauma-led success and reparative success• Why nervous-system regulation isn’t always about avoiding discomfort• How perfectionism and hyper-independence can become a ceiling• The difference between authentic visibility and performing visibility• How childhood and intergenerational beliefs can shape our relationship with money and receiving• Why people often enter this work through business, leadership, money, or relationship challenges rather than a desire to “heal”• How Farya helps clients build greater capacity for asking, receiving, earning, and being seen• Why healing can be the foundation rather than the destination• The question at the heart of Farya’s work: How good can it get?About Farya BarlasFarya Barlas is a Chartered Psychologist with more than 23 years of clinical experience. Her work focuses on helping high-functioning, ambitious women understand and move beyond subconscious survival-based patterns that can limit their capacity for success, visibility, wealth, leadership, and fulfillment.Drawing from trauma work, nervous-system regulation, psychology, identity work, and decades of clinical experience, Farya helps clients move from simply surviving their success to fully inhabiting it.She is also the host of the podcast From Trauma to CEO.Connect with FaryaWebsite: https://www.faryabarlas.comInstagram: @faryabarlas.psychologistPodcast: From Trauma to CEOFarya also generously offered listeners access to her trauma-led success checklist along with one day of Voxer access to explore what comes up as you work through it. Find the link in the show notes.Connect with AnnaWebsite: https://www.annaholtzman.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzman/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/annaholtzman/

What if your capacity isn’t a limitation to overcome, but information you can build around?In this episode, Anna talks with business strategist and coach Nikita Williams about what it means to create a business — and a life — that works with your actual energy, needs, and rhythms rather than constantly demanding that you override them.Nikita is the founder of Crafted to Thrive and host of the Business With Chronic Illness podcast. Since 2017, she has helped creatives, holistic practitioners, and entrepreneurs living with chronic illness build sustainable businesses that create consistent revenue without requiring them to constantly do more.Together, Anna and Nikita explore the shame that can arise around having limited or changing capacity, the pressure to follow one-size-fits-all formulas, and the surprising discomfort that can come with allowing things to become easier.They also talk about visibility, self-trust, boundaries, nervous system patterns, identity, and why so many entrepreneurs unintentionally recreate the same rigid systems they wanted to escape in the first place.In this conversation, you’ll hear about:• Why “increase your capacity” can be such an unhelpful message• Learning to treat your energy as something to steward rather than exploit• How chronic illness shaped Nikita’s approach to business• Why ease can feel uncomfortable, even when it’s exactly what you need• The vulnerability of being visible and sharing who you really are• How success can still be unsustainable• Why boundaries are essential to building freedom• The difference between having offers and having an actual business model• How doing less can sometimes create better results• What it means to trust that your pace is your pace• Why Nikita believes business is deeply personal• Building around your values, strengths, health, and real life instead of someone else’s formulaOne of the central ideas in this episode is simple but powerful: your pace does not have to match anyone else’s.As Nikita puts it, “My pace is my pace.”This conversation is for anyone who has ever wondered whether they’re doing enough, moving fast enough, working hard enough, or somehow falling behind — and wants to experiment with building from a place of attunement instead.Connect with Nikita WilliamsWebsite: https://thrivewithnikita.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thrivewithnikita/Podcast: Business With Chronic Illness, available wherever you listen to podcasts.You can also explore Nikita’s free business audit and join her email community, Built to Breathe, through her website.Connect with Anna HoltzmanWebsite: www.annaholtzman.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzman/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anna-holtzman/

What happens when you’ve spent decades becoming exceptionally good at succeeding inside a system — and then decide to build something of your own?In this episode, Anna sits down with Deb Boulanger, founder of Life After Corporate, who works with accomplished corporate women leaders making the transition into consulting, fractional leadership, coaching, and advisory work.Deb knows this transition from the inside. After a highly successful corporate career — including growing a new business from zero to $32 million in 30 months and leading a team of more than 50 people — she reached a point where the pace was no longer sustainable. Burnout, the end of her marriage, caregiving, motherhood, and menopause all converged into a larger question: What do I actually want my life to look like now?What followed was not simply a career change, but an identity shift.In this conversation, Anna and Deb explore what happens psychologically when the title, team, salary, and company name that once reinforced your sense of competence are suddenly gone — and you have to trust your own judgment in a whole new way.They talk about:• Why leaving corporate can bring up unexpected self-worth wounds• The role perfectionism, people-pleasing, procrastination, and fear play in entrepreneurship• Why market research can feel much more emotionally loaded than it sounds• The fear of being perceived as “salesy” — and how Deb reframes selling as service• Why visibility is essential if you want to be discoverable• The connection between pricing and self-worth• Deb’s powerful reminder: “No one is buying your self-esteem.”• Why underpricing can lead to burnout, resentment, and blurred boundaries• The difference between overpricing and overpromising• Why one failed webinar, launch, or sales conversation is simply a data point — not proof that your business won’t work• The financial and emotional “wobbles” that often happen when building something new• How to keep going when your nervous system wants immediate proof that your efforts are working• Why leaving corporate and building your next chapter can become something much deeper than a career moveDeb also shares stories from her work with women who have moved through uncertainty, rebuilt their confidence, and turned decades of experience into sustainable businesses and high-value advisory relationships.At its heart, this conversation is about learning to separate your value as a human being from the results in your business — and trusting that the expertise you built over decades did not disappear when you left your corporate role.Connect with Deb BoulangerWebsite:https://lifeaftercorporate.com/LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/debboulanger-thegreatdo-over/Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/deb_boulanger/You can also find the Life After Corporate podcast wherever you listen to podcasts.Connect with Anna HoltzmanWebsite:www.annaholtzman.comLinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/anna-holtzman/Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/anna_holtzman/

What if you didn’t need to know exactly where your creative path was leading before you took the next step?In this episode, Anna talks with Margo Tantau, creative industry veteran, founder of Tantau Studio, and host of the beloved Windowsill Chats podcast, about the winding path of a creative life and career.Margo has spent more than 30 years working across art, product development, licensing, creative direction, retail, manufacturing, coaching, and artist representation. Rather than following one perfectly mapped-out career plan, she has built her work by staying curious, noticing what lights her up, and following the opportunities, people, and ideas that pull her forward.Anna and Margo talk about what it means to create a career that feels unmistakably like you, even when you can’t see the destination yet. They explore the importance of keeping your creative flame alive, why connection can be more useful than trying to solve everything alone, and how allowing other people to support your work can make a creative life more sustainable.They also get into the vulnerability of visibility: sharing your work, telling your stories, putting an offer into the world, and trusting that what comes naturally to you may be exactly what someone else has been looking for.In this episode, we talk about:• How Margo’s winding creative career evolved from design and retail into product development, licensing, artist representation, teaching, and podcasting• Why you don’t need to know the destination before beginning a creative path• Following curiosity and paying attention to the things that “turn your head”• The difference between forcing creativity and allowing inspiration to emerge responsively• Why keeping even a small thread of creativity alive matters• The role of specificity and storytelling in helping people connect with your work• The fears that can come with sharing your work and making yourself visible• Why putting an offer into the world sometimes reveals a need you didn’t know was there• Building a creative career through practice rather than waiting for one breakthrough moment• How Margo manages a multifaceted creative business without trying to do everything herself• Learning to ask for help, collaborate, and let your work be held by more than one pair of hands• The importance of creative community and finding people with whom you don’t have to explain yourself• Margo’s encouragement to follow the small tug toward whatever interests, excites, or intrigues you nextAbout Margo TantauMargo Tantau is a creative industry veteran who has spent her career elevating artists and turning ideas into thoughtful, successful products. With over 30 years of experience in product development, art direction, and creative brand building, she’s collaborated with hundreds of artists, championing their work, mentoring their growth, and helping shape collections that truly resonate.Now, as founder of Tantau Studio, Margo formally represents a curated roster of surface designers and illustrators, continuing her long-held passion for connecting art with opportunity through strategic, heart-led representation.She also hosts Windowsill Chats, a beloved podcast where she shares candid conversations with artists, makers, and industry leaders about creativity, business, and the satisfaction of building a life in art.Margo believes that doing more of your own thing, boldly and consistently, is the key to building a career that’s true to who you are. To her, that’s what real creative success looks like.Connect with MargoWebsite: margotantau.comPodcast: Windowsill ChatsInstagram: @windowsillchats and @mtantauConnect with AnnaWebsite: www.annaholtzman.comInstagram: @anna_holtzman

What happens when we stop trying to outrun the parts of our story we wish were different—and begin to understand that those very shadows may hold some of the material for our healing?In this episode, Anna sits down with Cassidy Gard, a three-time Emmy Award-winning television producer, former Good Morning America correspondent, and author of Cosmic Goodness: Surrendering the Shadows to Live in the Light. Cassidy writes and speaks at the intersection of spirituality, motherhood, sobriety, grief, and reinvention.For years, Cassidy made a career out of telling other people’s stories, covering breaking news, mass shootings, the Me Too movement, and some of the most emotionally intense events of our time. Behind the scenes, she was carrying a story of her own: growing up with an alcoholic father, childhood anger and shame, grief, anxiety, and the exhausting work of masking the parts of herself she didn’t yet know how to hold.Cassidy began journaling at seven years old, and writing became both a refuge and, eventually, a way back to herself. In this conversation, she and Anna explore what happens when we turn toward our own inner world, recognize the breadcrumbs we’ve been leaving ourselves all along, and begin trusting the story that wants to emerge.They talk about:• Being highly visible while still hiding in plain sight• Why Cassidy began journaling as a child and how her relationship with writing evolved• The “cosmic winks” and seemingly small clues that can guide us through reinvention• Moving from telling other people’s stories to claiming your own• The emotional toll of working in breaking news and covering traumatic events• Cassidy’s experience caring for her estranged father at the end of his life• Grief, alcoholism, estrangement, and finding peace without receiving the closure you wanted• Why writing a memoir can require giving yourself permission to own your lived experience• Motherhood, sobriety, and intentionally creating a different kind of family life• Why spirituality doesn’t have to mean being endlessly “easy breezy”• The idea that the shadow isn’t the enemy—and that we can’t surrender what we haven’t first acknowledged• How to begin writing when you don’t have huge blocks of uninterrupted time• Trusting that your story is worth telling before you have proof of where it will leadCassidy also shares a powerful reminder for anyone who feels intimidated by the idea of writing: start smaller than the big picture. A voice memo, an iPhone note, ten minutes stolen from an otherwise full day—all of it counts. The work can accumulate before you ever know exactly what it is becoming.As Cassidy puts it, “The shadow is also where the medicine is that you’re seeking. You cannot surrender what you have not identified and acknowledged.”Connect with CassidyLearn more about Cosmic Goodness: Surrendering the Shadows to Live in the Light at CosmicGoodness.com.Follow Cassidy on Instagram at @cassidygard.Cosmic Goodness is available wherever books are sold. If you read it, consider leaving a review on Amazon or Goodreads—reviews can make a meaningful difference for debut authors.Connect with AnnaFollow Anna on Instagram: @anna_holtzmanLearn more about Anna’s work: www.annaholtzman.comSend Anna an email and tell her what stayed with you from this episode: [email protected]