EPISODE 134: Why Most Habits Don't Stick, and What Actually Works

100 days is not a small number. It's enough time to build a habit, stress-test it during the holidays, and walk into January already ahead instead of starting from zero.   This week, Coach Steph and I get into how to use these last 100 days to build real, lasting change without the extreme overhaul that burns you out and ends in you quitting on your plan.   What we cover: Why one small habit does more than a total lifestyle overhaul when you're working with a shorter runway How to pick the one process goal that'll actually move you forward before New Year's Day A way to practice with foods you feel out of control around, instead of white-knuckling past them The "never miss twice" rule, so one off day doesn't turn into a lost month Using the holidays to practice instead of an excuse to wait   You don't need next year's plan figured out. You need one habit, and 100 days to integrate it into your life.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.   Be the first to know when we're opening the doors to our signature psychology-based weight loss program, Outsmart Overeating (and get exclusive access to early bird discounts and fast action bonuses), join the Interest List.      If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

You know that thing where you eat the "bad" food in secret, then act totally normal five minutes later like it didn't happen?   Coach Steph and I get into why smart, capable women do this.   Turns out there are two totally different personalities behind it: the "disciplined one" and the "I'll start Monday" type.   One is protecting an image of perfection they've spent years building and protecting.   The other already believes other people view them as "lazy" or "out of control," because they live in a larger body. They're terrified someone will catch them eat "bad" foods and it will prove the narrative true.   Both end up overeating behind closed doors.   In this episode, we discuss:.   Why restrictors binge big behind closed doors while permitters never stop with the small stuff What both personalities are actually protecting when they hide food, and it's not about willpower The childhood pattern behind both, and why neither is your fault Why eating the "off-limits" food in public, on purpose, is what breaks the secrecy for good   By the end, you'll know exactly which one you are and what to do differently tonight.   Not sure which one you are? Take the diet personality quiz linked below.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.   Be the first to know when we're opening the doors to our signature psychology-based weight loss program, Outsmart Overeating (and get exclusive access to early bird discounts and fast action bonuses), join the Interest List.      If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

You lost the weight. So why do you feel fatter than ever?   That's the real question behind a Reddit post Coach Steph and I dig into this week: a woman down 55 pounds who looks in the mirror and still sees the body she started with. If you've ever hit a goal weight and felt... nothing, or worse, this episode is for you.   We get into why your brain lags behind your body, why extreme diets set you up to feel out of control the second real food is back on the table, and why "just lose the weight" was never going to fix how you feel about yourself.   In it, you'll hear:   Why weight loss can make your body image worse, not better The exact mental script Steph used to quiet a decade of "I hate my thighs" How to tell if your current diet is setting you up to fail (hint: check the calorie count) A simple neutrality practice you can try in front of your mirror today Why the women who skip the body image work are the ones who end up back in our inbox a year later   You don't need another meal plan. You need a brain that finally allows you to feel comfortable in your own skin.   What would change if you believed your body wasn't a problem to solve?   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.   Be the first to know when we're opening the doors to our signature psychology-based weight loss program, Outsmart Overeating (and get exclusive access to early bird discounts and fast action bonuses), join the Interest List.      If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

Doors to Outsmart Overeating are OPEN, y'all! Click here for program details.   Our signature program is live now through Thursday, and today's episode is the perfect place to start if you're on the fence.   Because here's the thing: two versions of you exist a year from now. Same starting point, completely different lives. The only thing that decides which one you become? What you do today.   In this episode, we get real about why your relationship with food feels stuck on repeat, and why more willpower isn't the fix. We're talking future self-continuity, the "marble in the jar" concept, and why decades of dieting have wired habits that aren't your fault, but are yours to change.   Here's what you'll walk away with:   Why your brain defaults to old patterns, and the one shift that interrupts it The "two versions of you" exercise to get clear on where you're headed How tiny decisions, not dramatic overhauls, actually rewire your identity around food Why visualizing "success" the wrong way keeps you stuck in willpower mode A daily practice you can start today to build evidence you're becoming someone new   This is a real, practical look at how change actually happens, one decision at a time.   Full program details avaiable in last week's episode and on the website here.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.     If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

It's 9pm. You told yourself today would be different. And here you are, standing in the kitchen, eating something you swore off, already planning how you'll "start over" tomorrow. Again.   This doesn't happen because you lack willpower. It's what happens when your diet is so extreme your brain eventually rebels. Feeling deprived from your dieting rules is what's driving the binge, not the other way around.   Coach Steph Miramontes and I break down Outsmart Overeating, our six-week program that helps women stop binge and emotional eating for good, plus exactly what's inside it.   In this episode:   The 3 types of women who struggle most with food (you'll probably clock yourself in one) Why restriction, not lack of discipline, is what's actually driving the bingeing A week-by-week look at the program: from the MindShift Method in week one, to breaking the binge/emotional eating cycle in week three, to tackling self-sabotage in week five What you get each week: live group coaching, 1:1 attention, and a 100% money-back guarantee The fear hiding underneath "what if I gain weight if I stop dieting"   Plus, the doors open for our next Outsmart Overeating group August 31 - September 3rd. Click here to join the Interest List. No obligation to join, just first access to the program details and exclusive fast action bonuses.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.     If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

Why does discipline seem to work everywhere else in your life except with dieting? Why do you white-knuckle a diet for months, then binge on the one thing you "weren't allowed" to have? Why does getting "back on track" never actually stick?   Agne asked herself those exact questions for 20 years. Cabbage soup diets, keto, six-day CrossFit weeks, a coach who told her maybe her body was just built to stay stuck.   She joined Outsmart Overeating in 2023 and shared her story on the podcast in fall 2024. Listen to that episode here.   Now she's back, two years later, with the real answer: the food rules were never the problem. Her thinking was.   This episode breaks down exactly what changed and how, so you can start applying it today:   Why you can't diet your way out of a mindset problem How rigid, perfectionistic rules create the exact bingeing they're meant to prevent What it actually looks like to loosen your grip on control without your life falling apart Why needing support again after progress isn't failure (and what to do when it happens)   If you're tired of "getting back on track," start here.   Doors open for our next Outsmart Overeating group August 31 - September 3rd. Click here to join the Interest List. No obligation to join, just first access to the program details and exclusive fast action bonuses.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.     If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

Ever notice how right before you're about to make a change in your life, your brain immediately comes up with a thousand reasons why you shouldn't?   That's fear. Your brain's only job is to keep you safe and familiar, not happy or fulfilled. That's why you keep going back to the same diets and rules that have already failed you, over and over.   Same fear that keeps people stuck in jobs or relationships they've outgrown. It shows up at your dinner table too.   Coach Steph and I get into why your brain hands you a pile of excuses the second you try something different, even after what you're doing now hasn't worked.   I also share the scariest thing I've ever done (quit my career, sold everything, moved to NYC with two suitcases) and what it taught me about acting scared instead of waiting for the fear to pass.   What you'll get:   Why your brain fights change, even good change How to tell real intuition from fear in disguise Why more of what hasn't worked won't get you anywhere new What it feels like when food stops taking up so much space in your head   Nothing changes if nothing changes. Pick one thing and use it tonight.   Doors open for our next Outsmart Overeating group August 31 - September 3rd. Click here to join the Interest List. No obligation to join, just first access to the program details and exclusive fast action bonuses.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.     If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

Client, Beth, spent 33 years on the diet hamster wheel. Six feet tall since high school, she never fit the mold, so she spent decades running the numbers: calories counted, macros tracked, every bite calculated before it hit her plate.   She swore she wasn't an emotional eater. Turns out, wanting to eat something just because it tastes good IS emotional eating. Nobody told her that.   Today, on her 53rd birthday, she's eating cake without the guilt spiral. No calorie math. No "I'll start over Monday." Just food, freedom, and sleep that isn't wrecked by shame.   Here's what you'll walk away with:   Why "emotional eating" doesn't look like sad-girl ice cream binges, and what it actually looks like for high-achievers The real reason trigger foods lose their power (hint: it's not willpower) How to tell the difference between over-desire and actual hunger Why going "overboard" with a forbidden food can be part of healing, not a relapse The exact self-talk that replaces number-crunching at every meal   If you've built a successful career and a solid life but can't crack this one thing, Beth's story will hit different. This isn't about another diet. It's about learning to trust yourself again.   Doors open for our next Outsmart Overeating group August 31 - September 3rd. Click here to join the Interest List. No obligation to join, just first access to the program details and exclusive fast action bonuses.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.     If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

Goals feel amazing to set. They just don't work.   "Once the kids are back in school, I'm starting fresh." You've said some version of that sentence more times than you can count. You set the goal, you get the rush, you white-knuckle it for three weeks, then you fall off. Then comes the guilt. The shame. The "why can't I just stick to anything" spiral.   Here's the truth: goals aren't the problem. They're the easy part. It's the boring, unsexy habits underneath them that create real, lasting change. Nobody wants to talk about that, because habits don't come with a before-and-after photo.   In this episode, Coach Steph Miramontes and I break down why even well-intentioned goals collapse under real life, and what to build instead. You'll learn:   Why goals have a finish line and habits don't The mindset shift that changes how you approach food for good The exact keystone habits creating outsized results for our clients Why waiting for the "right time" sets you up to fail How to stop negotiating with yourself over every bite   You don't need an overhaul. You need one small, repeatable habit. Pick one. Start today.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.   Be the first to know when we're opening the doors to our signature psychology-based weight loss program, Outsmart Overeating (and get exclusive access to early bird discounts and fast action bonuses), join the Interest List.      If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type

You've counted the calories. Weighed the food. Followed the plan to the letter. So why are you still standing in the pantry at 9pm, promising yourself Monday will be different?   Here's the uncomfortable truth: this isn't a food problem. It's a thought problem.   Every diet has you managing the action: track this, skip that, get back on track. But if the thought underneath stays broken, "I already blew it, might as well keep going," you'll keep landing in the same place no matter how well you follow the plan.   Wrong address, perfect directions. Still lost.   Steph and I break down the real mechanism behind change this week:   Why changing what you eat has to start with changing how you think, not the reverse The thought → feeling → action chain running every single bite The exact reframe for the second you think "screw it, I'll start over tomorrow" Why identity, not discipline, decides what you do next Where this overlaps with therapy, and where it doesn't   You'll leave with a shift you can use tonight, standing in front of that same pantry.   You can also connect with Leslie & Steph on Instagram.   Be the first to know when we're opening the doors to our signature psychology-based weight loss program, Outsmart Overeating (and get exclusive access to early bird discounts and fast action bonuses), join the Interest List.      If you want to learn how to not-only lose weight, but also lose the struggle along side it, you can get started by taking the Weight Loss Psychology Quiz: Discover Your Diet Personality Type