Ep 27: Disappointment and Expectations

In this episode Julie and Ginger talk about the 3Es of trauma. SAMHSA, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration of the US government, coined the term “the 3Es” and this has become core to the definition of trauma. The 3Es is a very basic concept but, while it is very basic, it isn’t simple. To determine if something is traumatizing, we can’t judge based on whether we think the event should be traumatizing. It is very individualized. SAMHSA says, “Individual trauma results from an event, series of events or set of circumstances, that is experienced by an individual as physically or emotionally harmful or life-threatening, and that has a lasting adverse effect on the individual’s functioning and mental, physical, social, emotional, or spiritual wellbeing.” The 3Es are: Event, Experience, and Effect. Events happen and that doesn’t mean it is traumatizing. Not everyone present at the event is traumatized. It depends on how you experience the event and how it affects your life. It is truly individualized. Listen in as Julie and Ginger talk about what makes an event more likely to be traumatizing and how this can be mitigated. Remember – Your trauma is not my trauma! And, no one gets to pick their trauma. It is truly the nervous system’s response.

In this episode, Julie and Ginger invite Robyn Gobbel into the studio. Robyn loves cultivating deep, resonant connections with anyone who is up for it, and especially loves teaching anyone who will listen how to harness the power of neuroscience so they can cultivate deep, resonant connections, too. Robyn says, “Really, what would change in the world if we could all see, be with, feel, and deeply know each other…and ourselves. I think everything would change!” Before the COVID-19 pandemic, Robyn was a therapist for almost 20 years, specializing in complex trauma, attachment, and adoption. Now, she creates communities and educational experiences grounded in regulation, connection, and felt safety for parents and professionals all over the world. Robyn is an author, podcast host and parenting coach. Robyn’s approach is based in neuroscience. She takes that complex topic and brings it to a level where parents can grasp it. Once we understand neuroscience, we can really begin to trust our intuitions. Neuroscience helps us stop applying band aids to behaviors. Instead, we can comprehend what is going on underneath the behaviors. This changes our approach. Listen in as Robyn talks about specific behaviors, such as lying. That a big one! She breaks down the difference between normal lying and abnormal lying. And then she talks about what is really going on beneath the lying. She says that it all boils down to felt safety, connectedness and regulation. For more information about Robyn, go to her website at RobynGobbel.com. There you can find a lot of free resources. To order her book, Raising Kids with Big Baffling Behaviors, go to ATN’s Bookshop at https://bookshop.org/p/books/raising-kids-with-big-baffling-behaviors-brain-body-sensory-strategies-that-really-work-robyn-gobbel/19679331?aid=22880&ean=9781839974281&listref=resources-for-parents-912ec909-948a-4642-aa54-957538d26cb8.

In this episode, Julie and Ginger invite Yvonne Johnson into the studio. Yvonne is the 58th president of the National PTA. She is committed to being intentional about creating more inclusion and diversity in schools, and she focuses on strengthening family and school partnerships. Yvonne has been involved in the PTA for over 30 years! The PTA’s mission is “Making sure that every child reaches their full potential by engaging and empowering families and communities to advocate for all children.” Yvonne says that she serves as the voice for families around all education issues. Listen in to learn what led Yvonne to be so passionate about trauma-informed education and learn more about the PTA’s current initiatives. These initiatives include federal, state, and local policies that keep our students healthy, supported and safe. A safe school is a priority for the National PTA. ATN is so honored to be mission aligned with the National PTA. If you want to learn more about the initiatives that were mentioned, go to: https://www.pta.org/home/advocacy/ptas-positions/Individual-Position-Statements/Position-Statement-Trauma-Informed-Care https://www.pta.org/home/events/National-PTA-Legislative-Conference https://www.congress.gov/bill/118th-congress/senate-bill/1426?q=%7B%22search%22%3A%22The+RISE+Act%22%7D&s=1&r=3

In this episode, Julie and Ginger invite Jen Alexander and Jennifer Dickey into the studio. They have come to talk about executive function skills and working memory. You may recognize Jen Alexander, as she has been in the studio several times. She is an educator, national certified counselor, school based registered play therapist and a leader in the movement to build trauma-sensitive schools. Jen is the author of Building Trauma-Sensitive Schools: Your Guide to Creating Safe, Supportive Learning Environments for All Students. Jennifer Dickey’s passion is in designing academic and effective support for divergent learners. She is the founder of Lotus Cognitive Solutions Groups, which provides coaching for children and adults with ADHD and Dyslexia. She is a classroom teacher, a gifted and talented specialist, an academic language specialist, and a full-time college professor. Together, they have developed a new guide to help educators, entitled Supporting Students’ Executive Function Skill in the Trauma-Sensitive Classroom: Focusing in on working memory. The guide has 8 colorful panels with practical advice broken into bite sized chunks. It explains how to recognize working memories challenges and how to shift your paradigm from “Why aren’t you doing your work?” to “What is difficult about this work?” Listen in to learn exactly what working memory is and why it is critical to school success.

Today, Julie and Ginger invite Dr. Susan Hopkins into the studio. Dr. Hopkins, along with Dr. Stuart Shanker, will be keynoting at ATN’s 7th Annual Creating Trauma-Sensitive Schools Conference in February 2024. Dr. Shaker is the MEHRIT Centre and Self-Reg Founder, and Dr. Hopkins is the Executive Director of the Self-Reg organization. Together they have authored several books. They are a powerful team! To learn more, go to www.self-reg.ca. Dr. Hopkins has over 20 years of experience in all levels of education, including roles as teacher, vice-principal, curriculum developer, and inclusion coordinator. Oh, and she is a mom. All of this experience has made her well-equipped to show us the need to be self-regulated. In this episode, Dr. Hopkins tells us exactly what Self-Reg is about, and she explains how it is anchored in understanding the brain-body science of stress. We all understand the meaning of self-regulation, but the Self-Reg Framework consists of 5 steps to deal with stress so that we can experience calm in our minds and bodies. At the MEHRIT Centre, people who care for and work with children and youth are taught the skills needed to better support dysregulated kids. Listen in as Dr. Hopkins reviews the five steps of this framework and gives examples of how to implement each one. You don’t want to miss this! And, you don’t want to miss hearing Drs. Shanker and Hopkins speak at our upcoming conference. For more information, go to www.attachmenttraumanetwork.org/conference.

In this episode, Julie and Ginger invite Lorraine Schneider into the studio to chat about the episodes from season 3 and there were some really great ones! Lorraine is a member of the ATN hard-working staff and one of her responsibilities is to edit the podcasts. As a result, she has listened to every one of them! As Lorraine says, “Yes, I have listened to each podcast and every one has great nuggets to take from it and apply to life each day.” Julie follows that up with, “You can’t go wrong with any of our episodes, we hate to brag, but….” Listen in as Julie, Ginger and Lorraine chat about the episodes that left an impression on them and why. We hope that you have a few extra moments to listen to some of our favorites during this holiday season. It’s a great time to catch up!

In this episode, Julie and Ginger welcome Dr. Aimie into the studio.  Basically, Dr. Aimie is amazing.  She is a double board-certified physician, boarded in both preventive and addiction medicine.  Additionally, she is a foster mom and an adoptive mom. Through her journey, trauma became her own personal story.  She realized that we talk about feelings but there is a biological piece that has been missing. As Dr. Aimie says, “Life experiences become one with biology.”  Listen in to hear what she has to say about the connection between one’s biology and one’s attachment style.  Also, listen and learn how we can use biology to alter attachment.  Fascinating stuff! Visit Dr. Aimie’s web page at www.TheEmbodyLab.com.  There you can find many resources including a guide to specific imbalances that occur in the body that hinder attachment. Dr. Aimie wants us to remember that “We have to integrate the biological approach with the therapeutic approach.” The two go hand-in-hand.

In this episode, Julie and Ginger delve into the definitions of trauma-informed. While this seems very simple, there are many definitions floating out there and we wanted to clarify exactly what ATN uses in its definitions. When ATN was created, there was no true concept of trauma and its effects on our children.  Thankfully, the trauma-informed movement has gained momentum throughout the last decade and half.  As a result, we see a lot of people throwing around the word “trauma” when they really mean something else. So, at ATN, we researched many resources to develop our definitions. In this episode, we first define trauma-aware. The next level is trauma-informed. Then comes along trauma-sensitive. The final step in the process is being trauma-responsive. Listen in to learn what these terms mean. One thing we learned along the way is that you can’t just learn to be trauma-sensitive.  Julie says, “It is something that you truly become.”  Julie and Ginger explain what that paradigm shift means. ATN is currently developing a Certification Program with levels for individuals, schools, and organizations.  Stay tuned to learn more about this program and its expected release in the Spring of 2024.

Today Julie and Ginger are talking about the 3 G’s: Gratitude, Grounding and Glimmers.  These are basic mindfulness strategies that provide emotional safety in both the home and the classroom. This is a hard time of year for those of us who are emotionally stressed, and our stressors really start to build up with work schedules, school schedules and work schedules during the holiday season. People can actually start to dread this time of year.  But, as Ginger says, “Not only can we survive, but hopefully we can learn to thrive.” You must give yourself permission to pause, reflect, make things smaller, dial down the craziness and really focus on what is important. Only then will the season truly shine. We need to know that “These are practices we must learn and seek out.  We can’t wait for them to come to us,” says Julie. Listen and learn how to find your Gratitude, Grounding and Glimmer ideas that you can use throughout this holiday season and beyond. To view the resources that are discussed in this podcast go to: https://www.attachmenttraumanetwork.org/wp-content/uploads/Triggers-and-Glimmers-map.pdf, https://www.attachmenttraumanetwork.org/wp-content/uploads/Glimmer-personal_profile_map.pdf and https://www.developgoodhabits.com/mindfulness-worksheets/

In this episode, Julie and Ginger talk about the school to prison pipeline with Leonard Webb. What an important topic this is!  Leonard retired from law enforcement and now uses his experience to address the issues of exclusionary discipline, implicit biases, and structural racism.   His goal is to improve the educational outcomes of students by improving relationships between administrators, teachers, parents, and students. Leonard provides equity-based solutions by bringing accountability to school leaders while increasing attendance and decreasing suspensions and expulsions.  He was appointed by Governor Hogan to the Juvenile Justice School Board in the state of Maryland. Listen in to learn what the school to prison pipeline really is, why it is important, and how we can work to reduce its numbers. Mr. Webb states, “Underfunded schools lead to overcrowded prisons.”  There is a direct correlation and many ways to make a difference.  He uses the concept of RISK - establish Real relationships, have Intentional interactions, create Safe spaces, and Keep asking questions. Yes, it takes us out of our comfort zone but that is what a risk is. It is a shift of our focus. Leonard tells us that it may not be easy, but it is really very simple. To learn more about Leonard Webb and his program, visit his Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/webbolutionary/ or go to http://endtheschool2prisonpipeline.com/. You can also email him directly at [email protected].