Embrace Fertility podcast

What to do when the clinic rings with bad news mid cycle

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Episode 75: Something a little different for you today. Last week I have had two clients reach out to me, both who were mid IVF cycle and both had been given bad news from their clinics. Information that means that although they are still in the race their chances had diminished.

Both were struggling with how to cope with the racing thoughts and what ifs? that come part and parcel with the phone call from the clinic.

I was going to make a personal video for each of them as that is how I usually support clients but thought in this instant I would record as audio and the advice might help others as well.

Notes what I talk about:

Step 1 : CBT the hell out of your thinking. Look at what type of thoughts you are having. Many of those I imagine are time travelling back into the past or into the future Are you creating a story? One that is a complete nightmare and scaring you? Question those thoughts, Is it true? Is it helpful? Until the clinic say it is the end you are still in the race.

Step 2 : Distract yourself and do everything you can to turn your mind to any other topic. Reach for your Lego, paints, remote, there are times when we DON'T want to numb out and we want to embrace our thinking and work with it/through it, midway through a cycle IS NOT that time. Just do what you can to distract your thoughts and cling on for the ride.

Step 3 : Remind yourself why you are doing this, really zoom out and think about the bigger picture. Even if this cycle is not successful that does not mean that you will never become a mother. Even if it’s your last cycle and you have told yourself this is your absolute last chance in reality there are other decisions that could be made. However now is not the time to be making those decisions to keep focused on the fact that you just need to keep plodding through this cycle and deal with the outcome when you actually get there. Beginning to grieve an unsuccessful cycle before you actually get there is not the best use of your time and energy right now.

Step 4 : Bring a sense of safety to your body. Practice techniques to bring you back into the present moment like the balancing breath, the self hug, Yoga, Quantum Flow or really simple EFT Tapping on the thoughts that are causing you most distress I let this go, it’s safe for me to let this go, I choose to let this go.

EFT Tutorial and info:

https://embracefertility.co.uk/eft-tapping-for-infertility-and-fertility/

All of the techniques above are ones that I teach in the Embrace Fertility Method. If you would like to know more about what it’s like to be supported by me please reach out and let’s have a conversation [email protected].

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